7. Life as it was

seven

Life as it was

*ELDEN*

F rom one day to another, in the blink of an eye, they have all left. Dad isn’t here anymore, and Gamma Tobias is gone, too. I don’t know where he went, just that his leaving caused a lot of whispers and rumors. At least Beta Oliver is still here, and he looks worried and tired, every day a bit more.

I’ve never had much of a relationship with him, he was always more Dad’s friend, and as that I never really trusted him. But he is still here while Dad is gone, Mom is gone, and Gamma Tobias is gone. I try not to bother Beta Oliver or Hazel with anything. They both feel like they need to keep an eye on me, to make sure I am alright, but it’s not the first time I have to watch out for myself.

Dad’s never really been around, even when he was here.

I spend my days doing my homework, learning, training… the usual. Studying comes easy to me, and it’s a welcoming distraction to go to school and to my classes with Jace and Flora. It feels like I’m in a different world then, with the other children laughing and playing. It’s just me who feels out of place. I try not to think of Mom, how she isn’t here anymore, and how her warmth has left with her.

There is nothing warm in the packhouse since she has gone. It’s cold and gloomy, and sad. Flora keeps inviting me over to her cottage for sleepovers, though, and Hazel has prepared a small guest room for me to stay in whenever I want to, and for how long I want to.

“Consider it your room,” she keeps saying.

It’s the only warm place in the pack. It has Hazel and Flora’s aura all over it. Even my lycan is more relaxed here.

“Do you have plans for the weekend?” Flora asks me.

She is the only one in the pack not avoiding me; the only one interacting with me normally instead of casting me pitiful and sad glances. Hazel told me not to hold it against the pack members, she explained that they just feel sad for having lost their luna, and also a bit angry for their alpha constantly abandoning them. She believes they don’t know how to approach me, out of fear of hurting my feelings or saying the wrong things.

At least now that Dad isn’t here to control me, I could actually hang out with some of the other kids. But I don’t feel like doing that anymore. I don’t care. I just want my peace.

“Elden,” Flora’s voice reaches me again. “The weekend?”

“Oh,” I shake my head to focus back on her. Hazel has just made dinner and invited me over. The upcoming weekend is my birthday, but she doesn’t need to know that. It’s not like anyone will remember, anyways, with the recent happenings. “I have nothing planned.”

“Then let’s do something,” she says. “Let’s play!”

“I don’t feel like playing,” I mutter.

“Oh, then how about we go for a walk?”

“That’s a lovely idea,” Hazel encourages us. “The fresh air will do you some good.”

“And maybe we can find new plants,” Flora says.

I don’t hate that idea. Flora knows the forest even better than I do. It’s like she never gets lost and she finds the most beautiful plants, usually. It’s quiet and relaxing to walk with her. “Okay,” I say without much motivation, but it’s still better than sitting at home and staring out of the window in my room.

At least I won’t be alone on my birthday.

The following days pass by without much change to my usual daily routine. The head of the kitchen staff, an elderly omega, dotes on me, just like the other maids do, and makes sure I have everything I want to eat. I never noticed how warm they are, and how kind. Dad used to look down on them and was mad when Mom spent too much time with the staff, but they are so nice. They talk about Mom too, sometimes, and about how much they liked her, and how she was always fair and kind to them.

She didn’t make them feel less. She remembered their birthdays and helped them with their private problems. She even helped one of them meet her mate.

I like to hear these stories, because they know Mom in a different way, in a way I didn’t know her. It makes me happy and sad at the same time how much they loved her and mourn her now.

Saturday comes, my birthday, and the kitchen staff make sure to have a beautiful cake prepared for me. Beta Oliver takes time off to have breakfast with me. He even has a present for me. A new bicycle, a pretty fancy one, which leans against the table in the dining hall of the packhouse, where he and I are having breakfast. It’s the alpha table, which used to be inhabited by the ranked members and my parents.

Now it’s just Beta Oliver and me.

“Do you like it?” Beta Oliver asks, hopefully.

The bike is great. It means I can finally go on a ride with Flora and Jace.

“Thank you,” I say genuinely. “It’s perfect!”

Beta Oliver smiles. “I’m glad to hear that. I thought a young man like you might like to have his freedom occasionally, and just take off. Just don’t do it too often, or I will grow some gray hair.”

“I promise,” I reassure him.

“That’s not all,” he says before handing me two parcels. A smaller one and a bigger one. “This arrived for you today.”

I glance at the sender, my hope however, is crushed immediately by Beta Oliver. “It’s not from the alpha,” he says quietly. “I… I am sorry. Tobias sent both of them.”

That does pique my interest though, and once Oliver has left for work to fill in for both Dad and Tobias, I return to my room, opening the bigger package first. There is a big, plush wolf in it, a little letter and a small box.

Dear Elden,

Happy birthday to the bravest young alpha. I know you will think this is stupid, but I thought about you and Regis when I saw this wolf.

As for the little box…

She would have wanted you to have this. It was part of her dowry. She always hoped that one day you would gift this to your mate.

Stay strong, Young Alpha.

I curiously open the box, blinking in surprise when I find a beautiful necklace, earrings and bracelet set inside it. It looks old but pretty. The necklace carries a deep blue stone; against the light it looks like there are little stars in it.

My gaze shifts towards the smaller package. Opening it, an envelope falls on the ground together with a small photo album. I open the latter first, skimming through it. To my surprise it’s full of pictures of Mom and me, and some people I don’t know. Old pictures… and old people.

One woman in particular catches my eye. She looks so much like Mom, and I guess she also looks a bit like me.

Beatrice Donna Alcott, it says.

Alcott. That’s my mom’s maiden name. Judging by her age and the yellowed paper I guess it might have been Mom’s grandma. I carefully peel the photo out and turn it over, and indeed, on the back of it I can see grandma written on it, and Elden’s great-grandmother.

Mom did that! She made this album for me, and she also put the names and descriptions at the back of every photo. I don’t know much about her family, but maybe that way I will finally learn about them.

For now, I put the album aside and grab the envelope that dropped to the floor. I have a sinking feeling in my stomach, like bricks suddenly gathering in my stomach. Once opened, I take a sheet of paper into my hands, swallowing thickly when I notice my mom’s handwriting.

I knew it.

But, maybe it’s just a happy birthday card. Something short and sweet. Something she wrote before she died.

My dear Elden,

I don’t know how to start this letter. When you read it, I will already be gone. I apologize from the bottom of my heart for not having been any stronger. I love you so much, you are my everything. I wish I could still be with you.

I hope you know it’s not your fault.

She wishes she could still be here?

It’s not my fault?

My eyes get blurred, and I close the letter again without reading the rest of it. I can’t. I just can’t. Why did you do this Mom? If you wanted to stay with me, if you loved me, why did you leave? I grab the letter and the photo album and put them away, suddenly feeling angry.

So angry, that I have difficulty breathing. I flex my fingers around the empty envelop, crunching the letter between them, my body shaking. I feel hot all of a sudden, sweat pooling on my forehead.

She abandoned me, like Dad abandoned me.

Well, at least she made sure I got a letter on my birthday. I should probably be thankful, because Dad didn’t even call! He couldn’t even do that much!

Why am I even surprised?

While still venting in my anger, I hear footsteps coming closer. Light footsteps. Someone is running and then without further ado the door to the Alpha Suite gets ripped open, the footsteps coming closer until my door gets kicked open, also.

Flora jumps inside and throws her hands up in the air. “Happy Birthday, Elden!”

“Flora?” I ask, surprised.

She twirls around me and grabs my hands. “We will have the best day ever, today! It’s your birthday. I planned it for days.”

I stare at her. “But…how did you know…”

“Did you think I’d forget!? That’s why I asked you for your plans, you big dummy!” She grabs my hand. “Come, Grandma and I prepared all your favorite dishes. Of course, we don’t know your favorites yet, so we just made everything. And I have a present for you!”

I forget about everything else. I forget that my father didn’t even bother checking in with me on my birthday, I forget that my mother took wolfsbane and threw herself out of a window in front of my eyes. I forget the anger, the resentment, the sadness.

I just follow Flora to her and Hazel’s cottage, my eyes widening when I see it beautifully decorated with balloons and a huge ‘Happy Birthday’ sign. Jace is already waiting for us and waves excitedly, while Beta Oliver helps Hazel carry some plates outside.

The beta smiles at me. “Are you surprised, young crown prince?”

“I am,” I admit.

“Wait till you know that everyone is coming,” Flora beams.

“What do you mean with everyone ?” I ask her curiously, just to be interrupted by footsteps coming closer. Some of the pack’s children are running towards us and waving. I can hear lots of happy birthdays as I'm surrounded by everyone.

I never had a birthday party, not one like this. Not with other kids.

I guess that’s the good side of Dad not being here. At least I have no one to yell at me or hit me.

“Flora decided everyone should be invited,” Hazel says with a gentle smile. “Beta Oliver helped me with everything.”

“I can’t possibly accept this,” I mutter, as I watch the other kids putting their presents on the gift table and chatting excitedly.

“Of course, you can,” she says.

“You and Flora gave so much to me,” I tell her.

“As did you to Flora,” Hazel says. “This, here, wouldn’t have been possible just two months ago when she was still getting bullied by everyone.”

I turn my gaze towards Flora, watching how she sorts the parcels on my gift table, making sure no one steals them away. She waves at me and beams.

“Mom would have liked this too,” I admit, my anger from before vanished completely. I feel bad for having felt so angry with her.

“Carolina was a kind and gentle woman,” Hazel says, her eyes clouding over. “She was always looking out for others, and would have given everything she had to save whoever was in need.”

“Really?” I ask curiously.

“I knew her well,” Hazel tells me. “When she was younger, she was said to be the most beautiful young she-wolf in the country,” she chuckles. “And such a kind woman. Every young man was courting her.”

“And then Dad turned out to be her mate?” I ask.

Something in Hazel’s eyes seems to flash, but she soon smiles at me. I don’t want to bother her with questions, but I make sure to remember her reaction for a later point.

“Go now,” Hazel gently nudges me towards the other kids, “and have fun."

The birthday party Flora organized manages to raise my mood for a couple of days, then the euphoria passes. I’m not as sad as before, but I realize I’m not the same anymore. I’m not the same as before Mom died. It’s not as easy to pretend to be happy anymore, not that I ever truly was.

I slowly start going on playdates with Jace and Flora again, both of them happy for me finally coming out with them again. We even take the bikes sometimes, and take detours to the lake in the pack. Once, we also met at Jace’s pack and played there.

It’s a month after my birthday, when Beta Oliver tells me that we’ll soon be hosting high guests. Two elders of the council who will come here to help him lead the pack, but also to help me with my powers and with the prophecy.

“I wonder who they are?” Flora mutters, furrowing her brows.

She and Jace have made sure to visit me on the arrival of the two elders, and look like they are about to go on a secret spy mission, like in the comic we read recently. They have their faces pressed against the window of my room, while we watch the road leading to the pack house. A gray car comes closer, and Beta Oliver approaches it the moment it halts.

He opens the door for an older woman to get out, followed by an even older man. “Elder Geneva,” Beta Oliver greets the woman with a smile before turning to the man. “Elder Samuel. I’m honored you are visiting us.”

Jace, Flora and I continue watching them as they walk towards the pack house, until Hazel approaches them and hugs Geneva.

“Grandma knows that woman,” Flora says, staring at the scene with intense concentration. “She hugged her, so she can’t suck.”

“I agree, if she is Hazel-approved, she is alright,” Jace says.

Hazel turns to Samuel, nodding at him and shaking his hand politely.

“Not so sure about him,” Flora says.

“At least Hazel didn’t punch him.”

“I don’t think Grandma would ever punch someone,” Flora frowns.

“I bet she does,” Jace beams. “She is a cool grandma.”

The two of them bicker for a bit, while I keep looking outside. Geneva raises her head, gazing towards my window. For a moment, our eyes meet and she smiles warmly at me, raising her hand to wave.

I wave back at her.

For an hour or so, nothing happens until there is a knock at the door to the Alpha Suite, and Beta Oliver leads the guests inside. Flora and Jace have positioned themselves next to me like they are my bodyguards.

“Hello Elden,” Geneva is the first to greet me, coming closer to me and taking my hand into hers. “You look just like your mother.”

“You knew her?” I ask.

“Of course, we were good friends.”

I glance towards Hazel, noting how she nods encouragingly at me. “It’s nice to meet you,” I tell Geneva, feeling how my tension melts away a little.

She smiles, gesturing towards Samuel. “That’s Samuel. He is working with me. He is nice, although he looks grumpy.”

Samuel shifts around, looking flustered, but he nods eventually. “We are here to help,” he says.

“With what?” Flora asks bluntly.

“The pack,” Geneva explains patiently. “And Elden is the future Crown Prince. He will have questions eventually, about the prophecy, his legacy, his powers. And so will you.”

Flora blinks, looking at Geneva in shock.

“Why are you surprised?” I ask her. “You are part of the prophecy, too, and you have your lycan already.”

“Right,” Flora beams. “I am cool, too.”

“So, are you his friend or his bodyguard?” Samuel tries with a joke.

Flora just shakes her head, as if he asked the most stupid question ever. “Clearly,” she says, grabbing my hand. “I am his princess.”