38. Changes

thirty-eight

Changes

*FLORA*

T he world keeps moving, and it’s weirding me out. It’s just so hard to wrap my head around the fact that Grandma isn’t here, that I am living in a world without her, and that Dad wanted to return to me, but never made it. Somehow, my life keeps going on, and there are hours when I forget to be sad. I throw myself into my work, so that helps. It also helps that I don’t need to go to school anymore, as my exams are done. I will miss the time I spent with my friends, but I am glad I can focus on other things now.

Sometimes, I pause and wonder how I can even move on, how it’s possible to live my life the way I do, but then I try to remember what Grandma wanted for me and what she always taught me. Elden made sure we send her off the way she deserves it with the whole pack allowed to be present to watch the pyre, and a feast for everyone. She always loved to give more than she took.

Most of the day I spend time with Elden or work. To my surprise I am really starting to enjoy what I am doing. I thought becoming luna would overwhelm me completely, but with Emilia’s help and her years of experience from her old pack, I am learning some neat new tricks. She encourages me to try new things and to follow my ideas, and that failure is part of the process.

Elden’s douchebag dad is a true idiot for the way he treats her. He could have benefited so much from her. It’s mind-boggling how little he cares for anything.

Sometimes, like today, we are all in a meeting together. “I see,” Geneva says, before she closes the folder Elden has prepared with his betas. “There is nothing I can add. You clearly have very valuable support and some great ideas yourself.”

“The pack will benefit greatly from you,” Samuel agrees. “I know you and Flora are both very young, and so is Vincent, but I think the time has come.”

“You mean for us to take over the pack?” Elden asks.

“Flora will turn eighteen tomorrow,” Geneva says. “I agree with Samuel. Let’s not postpone it any further. You are already doing the work of an alpha, and Flora is already very much doing her luna duties. You can still do what you do now, learn and collect experience by having the official rank.”

“What will Caelum say?” Emilia asks. “I do agree with what you said. By now, handing them the official title will just be a technicality. The pack already sees them as their leaders. Flora and Elden will continuously learn in their rank, but will Caelum agree?”

Geneva turns to look at Samuel. He nods at her. “Let that be my problem,” he says.

“What do you want, Elden?” Geneva asks. “Are you ready?”

“I don’t think I will ever be truly ready,” he says. “But I want to take over the pack. It will be much easier for me to make decisions and improve everything with Vincent’s and Calvin’s help, when we all have the official ranks and authorization. And I believe Flora thinks similarly. Do you?”

He knows I do, we have talked about it, but I am happy he allows me to voice my own opinion in front of everyone. “I agree with Elden. It’s going to be easier for me once I am officially luna. I will not be a quiet luna, either, and very much intend to do as much for the pack as possible.”

At that, both Emilia and Geneva look happy. “A pack needs a luna,” Geneva says.

“Yes, don’t be afraid to make changes,” Emilia agrees. “Silverlake is a big pack, much bigger than any pack I have encountered by now. It needs all the strength you can muster.”

“I certainly don’t want to rule on my own,” Elden explains. “Flora is going to be my equal.”

My heart makes a little jump of joy at his words. With all the grim experiences I have had and the awful truths I have learned, Elden remains my constant. He is respectful, loyal and hot as fuck. How did I get so lucky?

Well, our grandma is the Moon Goddess, Celeste chimes in. One could say we have connections.

I don’t think it’s just that, I say. Elden was able to see beyond the weird, creepy girl I was and probably still am. He sees me, and he has never been scared or grossed out by who I am. I believe this is why he was chosen as my mate.

Maybe he was chosen as my mate because he truly was the one for me. I have always felt like that. Elden is, furthermore, a blessed royal lycan, and Regis is strong. He still hasn’t reached his full potential, but I want to believe we will be quite the match.

You are right, we were probably matched for a reason. And tonight, we will mark our man!

I startle at her words, my blood suddenly running hot. Goddess, tonight I am turning eighteen! I completely forgot. I will mate with, and mark, Elden, and I will shift for the first time! It’s all going to happen tonight.

As if it forgot how to beat, my heart stutters slightly, before picking up its pace, hammering against my chest. I suddenly feel so alive. The last days and weeks have passed in a blur, and suddenly it feels like I can have something to look forward to again.

Elden reaches out his hand under the desk and takes mine, squeezing it slightly. He looks worried. I grin inwardly. Oh, if only he knew what I was thinking.

Well, he will get to know soon enough!

The meeting drags on for a couple of hours though, and there is no time for ogling Elden. Instead, I have my own ideas to present, happy that everyone seems to agree with the changes I want to make.

“I don’t know about all of you,” Vincent says, when we finally wrap up everything. “But I am hungry as fuck.”

“That’s not exactly how I would voice it,” Geneva chuckles. “But I agree.”

“I will have the kitchen prepare something for us swiftly,” Emilia promises.

“Do you want to hang out afterwards?” Vincent asks us.

My heart sinks at his suggestion. He really is such a great person, and a good friend, especially to Elden, but also to me. I don’t want to shoot his offer down, but I want to spend the night with Elden and celebrate into my birthday.

“We can’t,” Elden says. “Flora is turning eighteen tomorrow, and we want to spend midnight together.”

“Oh, right, she will be able to shift then,” Samuel says.

Geneva snorts. “Right,” she chuckles. “That too!”

Calvin has listened to the exchange, his eyebrows furrowed, now however, it seems to dawn on him what Geneva was hinting at. Fantastic, everyone here now knows of our plans. Well, on second thought, that’s not too bad. Now that they know, they will hopefully stay away from us for the remainder of the night. I perk up inwardly. That’s a good thing, let them all know!

I take Elden’s hand. “He is all mine tonight,” I say bluntly. “Unless you want to join, please stay away.”

“What? No one is joining!” Elden exclaims, his eyes narrowing to a glare while he looks at his friends.

“Don’t worry,” Vincent mutters. “I am not insane.”

“I won’t join, either,” Calvin says. “Flora is not my type. No offense.”

Elden does take offense though, by the way he looks at him, clearly annoyed at the way he is talking about me, but I couldn’t care less. “I prefer you not lusting over me, anyways,” I say. “I don’t find you hot either.”

Calvin nods. “That’s good to hear.”

“See?” I look at Elden, hoping this will reassure him. “We have a mutual understanding.”

Elden doesn’t look reassured at all. He smiles at me, before he tosses Calvin another glare. Calvin doesn’t seem to really mind, though. I don’t think he truly likes me or can relate to me. I actually think, that although he seems to like Elden, he also can’t relate to the way he cares and loves me. But that’s okay. Just like Janice said, he doesn’t need to be my person.

Emilia returns together with two omegas from the kitchen staff and stops both my thoughts and the conversation. Maybe it’s for the better. She brings freshly made omelets and sandwiches for us. Food always successfully shuts us all up, especially when we are as hungry as we are now.

“Finally alone,” I sigh, stretching slightly when Elden and I leave the packhouse and walk to my cottage. “It was a long, successful meeting, but… did I mention how long it was?”

Elden takes my hand and twirls me around playfully. “It took forever,” he exclaims, stopping abruptly and making me stumble into his arms.

I laugh, wrapping my arms around his neck while he lifts me up. I allow my fingers to move through his hair. It’s getting longer, but I like it that way. I don’t think Elden could ever do anything that would make him look unattractive.

Well, maybe if he went bald. Then, Celeste and I would need to focus fully on his inner values and his other amazing traits.

“What are you thinking about?” Elden asks. “You seem to be deep in your thoughts.”

“I was trying to imagine you bald,” I say bluntly.

Elden bursts into laughter, making my heart do backflips in joy. I love it when he laughs. He has the cutest dimples, and just looks so happy. I am so grateful he considers me a safe space and allows himself to let his guard down. “So, I should cut my hair?” he jokes.

“Please don’t!” I groan.

He puts me back on the ground, taking my hand again and tugging me along. “I wonder what I would look like,” he muses as we step into my cottage.

I grin. “Well, let’s say: be happy you have other things going for you.”

“Would you still love me if I go bald?” he asks.

I wrap my arms around him and snuggle against him. “That’s a silly question,” I say. “It doesn’t matter what you look like, you will always be my Elden.” I gaze up at him. “What about me?”

“You mean, if you went bald?” he jokes. “Well, I bet you would look hot with or without hair.” He wraps his arms around me, gently swaying us. “No, seriously, you will always be my beautiful flower.”

“Elden,” I say. “I want you to mark me tonight.”

“Definitely,” he says. “You are finally turning eighteen. I am not going another day without you being fully mine. Regis and I can’t wait to be fully connected to you and Celeste.”

“Good thing I was born between midnight and one minute after,” I smirk. “I have never been patient, it seems.”

“I didn’t know that,” Elden says. “At 0:01? You have always been special. But that’s no surprise, seeing whose daughter you are.”

We both stay quiet for a moment. “I haven’t been easy to deal with recently,” I admit. “I know that.”

“Flora-“

“There was a lot of trauma dumping on you, as if you didn’t have enough problems already.”

“So what?” he says. “You experienced a major loss, and then faced another traumatic truth. And all in such a short time. Besides, if anything, I have been trauma dumping on you my whole life! This here-“ he makes a wide gesture into the room. “Is what I am here for. The amount of drama I unloaded on you can’t even be measured. Yet, you were there for me through it all, and I will be there for you.”

“I am feeling better recently,” I admit. “But I am scared I will feel worse again.”

“It’s a process,” he says quietly. “Don’t pressure yourself, Flora. It’s an up and down, and that’s okay. You are allowed to grieve.”

“I want to be strong for the pack,” I say. “They will need me.”

“But you don’t need to be strong for me,” he says. “You let me cry over my mom as much as I needed to, and I will let you grieve for as long as you need it.”

I take a deep breath, suddenly feeling a lot lighter. “That sounds good,” I say.

He looks at me gently. “It’s what mates are for.”

“It’s 11 PM now,” I say before jumping into Elden’s arms, happy when he catches me. He has had another growth spurt recently and now easily towers over everyone else. My hot alpha with his sexy ass, and his even sexier personality! “Let’s not waste any more time!”