13. Travis

travis

. . .

T wo days. For two of the longest days of my life, I’ve waited for a knock at my door. When it finally happens, I shrug it off as a salesman or Cay. Except, Caleb has a key. Maybe they’ll go away if I pretend I’m not home.

I fucked up, forcing Cass into an impossible situation. We’re consenting adults, but she’s engaged. I never should’ve encouraged what we did.

I can still taste her.

Since I’m leaving tomorrow morning to help with the fire construction work, Pop invited me to have lunch with him. I’m not sure if Cass or Caleb will be there; it could only be the two of us. It’s almost better that way. There’s another succession of three knocks. My pup is eagerly rushing to my front door as if my future wife is on the other side of it.

I’m projecting, but Inferno loves Cassidy, so it could actually be her, but she has a key.

I set down my iced tea, only making it half way out of my seat before a key is in my lock and Cass comes storming in, looking as if she hasn’t slept in days. She makes a beeline for my coffee maker with a quick, “Hey, Inferno. We’ll play later after I talk to your daddy.” I rush over to her, and as I reach the kitchen, the first thing I check is her ring finger. Empty. I’m about to ask what happened when she steamrolls over me, hands braced on my counter. “I broke it off. But that doesn’t mean I’m yours.”

“Cass, I…”

She breaks.

Lowering her head, sobs rattle her whole body, and without a second thought, I turn her to face me. Wrapping her in my arms, I refuse to let go. Her tears wet my shirt as I slide my hand into her hair and hold her close.

“I’m sorry, so sorry about the other day,” I tell her softly. “How can I fix this?”

Cass pulls back to look at me, and I wipe away her tears with my thumbs. With her face in my hands, I’m desperate to kiss her, but it’s not what she needs right now. She takes a deep breath, her eyes searching mine. “What is this? What are we doing?”

“Do you love Zack?”

Shaking her head, she admits, “I told him everything and he still wants to marry me.”

“That doesn’t answer my question.” I tuck a few rogue strands of hair behind her ear and ask again, “Do you love Zack?”

“I do, but I’m not in love with him. There’s never been fire or passion; no fireworks. If I married him, I would be marrying a friend who I care deeply about. But that’s what we’re supposed to do, right? Marry your best friend? That’s the dream that’s sold to us, but I want… more. ”

“I guess by that logic I’m screwed. Caleb is my best friend, and he’s off the market.”

Cass rests her forehead on my chest and huffs a small laugh. “I’m being selfish.”

I kiss the top of her head and whisper into her hair, “No, you’re not. You want someone who makes the whole world melt away when you’re with them. That’s not selfish, Cass.”

I’m grateful she doesn’t look up as she asks, “Is that what you want?”

I hold her tighter. “Yeah. I want someone who embraces my chaos, supports and encourages me, loves my flaws and sees them as strengths. Someone who, for so many years, I fought how I felt about them, because I was too afraid they wouldn’t love me back.”

“That’s very poetic, but that’s not me.”

“Are you sure about that?”

“I don’t know anymore,” she admits softly.

“What do you want, Cass?” I tilt her chin to look at me. Her puffy, red-rimmed eyes are filled with hope and longing. “You can’t have us both.”

“I know. I broke it off with Zack because he deserves better than a woman who wants someone else. He insisted he’d wait for me to figure everything out, but?—”

“I’ll stop you right there. You deserve to be happy. Hell, all three of us do. Without worrying about what you think he deserves or how I feel about you, what do you want?”

“I want a chance to fall in love.”

I lean in, the side of my nose brushing hers. Neither of us closes the distance as we share a breath. My voice is strained as I offer, “I want to be the one you fall in love with.”

Cass slides her hands up my chest and cups my neck, pulling me the last inch until our lips finally meet. She lets out a relieved sigh as I angle her face to deepen our kiss. It’s not rushed; she lets me taste and tease her, and I’m getting hard from a single kiss. Her soft moans have me teetering on the edge of losing control. I grip behind her thighs to pull her legs around me and set her on the counter. As much as I’d love to taste every inch of her skin, I resist stripping her bare in my kitchen.

We break apart, panting; her eyes are wild and dark. I’ve always wanted Cass, and now that I have a chance to keep her, I never want to let her go. “I can give you the fireworks you crave, but just like you, I want more.” I rest my forehead on hers. “I want the same love my grandparents had; what Cay and Ingrid have.”

“That’s a tall order,” she teases.

“It is, but I think we’ll manage.” I can’t help teasing, “So, do I wife you up now, or later?”

Cassidy laughs, wrapping her arms around my neck, and I tug her hips to me until our bodies are flush. I’m not an easy man to love, but Cass is an easy woman to love. We’ll probably break each other’s hearts; a problem for another day.