19. Nineteen

19

NINETEEN

W hen I was a kid, I always thought I wanted to be part of the “elite” Las Vegas crowd. I was convinced that the glittery night life, the high-end food, and the endless cocktails were for me. Somewhere along the way, I’d lost sight of that dream. I hadn’t dropped it as much as it had disappeared. Being part of that world had made those memories rush forward.

I was not the same teenager who wanted that, though. I was an adult, and now I understood how empty this world was.

“Enjoying the appetizers?” Cora asked as she appeared at my elbow. Zach had been back with his father a full thirty minutes at this point, and I was starting to get worried. It didn’t help that I didn’t know these people. What made matters worse was that I didn’t want to know these people. Not even a little.

I swallowed the stuffed mushroom cap I’d been nibbling on and smiled. “They’re very good,” I assured her. Honestly, I wasn’t much of a cook, but I had a mean stuffed mushroom recipe. They were one of my favorites so I’d learned how to make them when I was in college. I got pretty good at it. “I can’t wait for the rest of the food.”

“Yes, they’re setting up the prime rib carving station now.” Cora pointed, and I jerked my chin in that direction, frowning when I realized how the room was shaping up.

“Wait … this isn’t a dinner,” I realized out loud.

“What?” Cora cocked her head. “It’s a party.”

“I thought it was a full dinner, though.” My disappointment was boundless. “This is one of those things where you take a plate around and get teeny-tiny samples of food and pretend it’s dinner.”

Cora’s lips turned down. “That’s what’s popular right now.”

“Yeah, but … after a full day of golf, I want a full dinner to go with it.”

Cora blinked. Then she blinked again.

“Never mind.” I waved my hand. “I’ll make Zach take me to Popeyes.”

“Is that a new restaurant I haven’t heard about?”

“It’s like KFC, but with better chicken. The mashed potatoes and gravy are awesome too.”

Cora looked horrified. “You can’t be serious. We have oysters here.”

“Fried or raw?”

“We don’t do anything fried.” She said it as if I’d suggested putting human babies on the menu after deep frying them.

“Actually, I don’t know why I asked that,” I admitted. “Oysters taste like snot whether they’re fried or not.” I shook my head. “I think I’ll stick with the Popeyes.” I craned my neck to look down the hallway where I knew Zach and his father were holed up. “How long do you think Ryder will be crying in his golf shoes?”

Cora worked her jaw.

“I’m just asking because I’m trying to manage my expectations,” I explained. “I can’t risk getting to hangry territory. I’m a monster when I’m hangry.”

“What’s hangry?”

“You know, hungry and angry. I’m getting close to that point now.”

“I don’t… I…” Cora studied me. “You’re not what I expected for Zach,” she blurted out of nowhere.

I shouldn’t have been surprised by the sentiment, and I wasn’t. I was surprised that she came out and said it to my face. I had to give her credit for that, because her type preferred backstabbing to honesty.

“Who did you see him with?” I asked, rather than going with my gut and giving her a piece of my mind.

“Someone who went with the flow,” Cora replied. “Someone who understands that he’s going to be the center of her world, for better or worse. Someone who lets him shine and doesn’t expect anything in return.” She hesitated. “Someone like me.”

That was a lot to unload in a short amount of time. I darted a look toward the hallway again, then focused on her. “I don’t happen to believe that one person should be the center of anybody’s world,” I explained to her. “I believe two people should give and take in equal amounts. That doesn’t mean one half of a couple isn’t going to be needier than the other at any given time, but the only way a marriage truly works is if there’s balance.”

Cora didn’t immediately respond. She just stared.

“I don’t want Zach to give me the world,” I continued. “I just want Zach to help balance my world. I want to give to him as much as I hope he wants to give to me.”

“But … he’s going to be the head of Stone Group at some point,” Cora argued. “He’s going to be large and in charge.”

“Are you sure he wants that?”

“Of course he wants it. I mean … it’s the chance of a lifetime.”

“A chance for him,” I pressed. “Why didn’t his sisters get that chance?”

“Oh, has Opal been bending your ear?” Cora rolled her eyes. “I should’ve known that she would try to get you on her side. You can’t listen to anything she says. She’s bitter.”

“I don’t blame her,” I replied. “I mean, I don’t know her well. It’s entirely possible she’s a crap worker with a bad attitude. However, if she’s not, I think she deserves the same opportunities that are being afforded to Zach.”

“Does he know you believe that?” Cora asked. She almost acted as if I was betraying him.

“He believes that,” I replied. “Do you have any idea how hobbled by guilt he is? He loves his sisters. He also feels guilty because he believes they were overlooked in favor of him. He lives in fear of them a bit, too, which I think is kind of a funny. Almost all of that isn’t his fault, though.”

“And whose fault is it?” Cora demanded.

“It’s Ryder’s fault, and your fault too, because you could’ve stood up for your daughters.” I shouldn’t have been saying this to her. It wasn’t my place. Honestly, it was likely to cause issues for Zach. I couldn’t seem to stop myself though. “Your son is a good man. He’s one of the best men I know. You’ve put him in a position where he feels paralyzed, though.”

“It’s his job to take over the company,” Cora insisted. “Do you know how many people would kill to be in his position? Pretty much everybody in Vegas.”

“But you didn’t let him choose that position for himself. You assigned him his place in life at birth. I mean… I never once heard Zach wax poetic about being an astronaut when we were kids.”

Confusion knit Cora’s eyebrows together. “I don’t understand what you’re getting at. Zach wouldn’t do well in space. They have to eat meat out of a bag.”

Ah, of course that’s what she would worry about. I had to fight hard not to let my laughter fly. “I’m not saying that he would’ve been a good astronaut,” I replied when I was reasonably assured I could speak without losing it. “Actually, I think he probably would’ve been a terrible astronaut. Math isn’t his strong suit, and you’re right about the food. That’s not the point, though.”

“And what is the point?” she asked primly.

I leaned in closer to her. “When I was five, I wanted to be a ballerina.”

“I didn’t even know you took dance lessons.” She looked me up and down. “I’m not quite certain you have the build for it.”

“I was never going to be a ballerina,” I said. Good grief, could this woman get more literal? “I just saw a ballerina on stage and dreamed of being her. A couple months later I wanted to be a pirate. Those Pirates of the Caribbean movies were popular at the time. It wasn’t reasonable that I would be a pirate, but my parents didn’t dissuade me. They let me dream because they knew that I would pick my own path eventually.”

“I still don’t know what you’re getting at.”

I kept pushing even though I recognized it was likely a wasted effort. “Zach never got to dream,” I replied. “He never got to pretend to be an astronaut … or a cowboy … or a police officer. From birth he was told he was taking over the Stone Group. That became his whole identity.”

“It’s a good job.”

“Maybe, and he might even want it.” The truth was, Zach had never expressed hate at the idea of taking over Stone Group. He had, however, expressed fear that he would never live up to his father’s legacy. That was an entirely different thing. “You guys need to let him breathe, though. He can’t decide what he wants if you’re suffocating him.”

Cora was clearly affronted by what I’d said. “We’re good parents.”

“I think you want to be. Especially you. You have to listen to be a good parent. You guys don’t listen.”

“Of course we do.” Cora was getting riled up, which was a first because I’d never seen her like this before. “I’m here whenever Zach needs to talk.”

“I hope you mean that. My problem is that instead of dealing with your big crybaby husband, you sent Zach in there to deal with what I’m sure amounts to a toddler tantrum.” I looked up when I sensed a pair of eyes on me and found an exhausted looking Zach standing in the hallway. It was obvious he’d been through the wringer. “Look at him,” I said in a low voice.

Cora followed the direction of my chin and stared at her son.

“He’s exhausted. He’s working so hard. None of his efforts are ever acknowledged, though. All your husband does is tell him what he did wrong. Nothing he does right is ever touched on. Zach is a really good man, but he’s going to drown if you guys don’t throw him a lifeline.”

Slowly, Cora tracked her gaze back to me. “Is that what you are? His lifeline I mean.”

I shrugged. “I’m whatever he wants me to be, and I will be however long he wants me to be it. Sometimes the best thing you can do is let someone figure things out on their own. Just be there and when they’re ready, they’ll come to you.”

Cora absently ran the fingers of her right hand over the knuckles on her left hand. I thought for sure she was going to shut me down. Instead, she nodded out of nowhere. “You’ve given me some things to think about.”

“I have?” I was floored.

“You’re opinionated.” A ghost of a smile played around the corners of her lips when she glanced back at me. “You remind me of my daughters.”

“Is that a good thing?”

She laughed, although the sound was stilted. “Yes, it’s a very good thing.”

“Well, thanks for that … I guess.”

“You should take him now,” she said, her voice low and urgent. “Before Ryder comes out and starts drinking and complaining. Take Zach somewhere fun.”

“You want us to skip your party?”

She snorted. “You’re going to be looking for the quickest escape possible to get … whatever that food you mentioned before was. Go with my blessing. Zach has the weekend off. Take him somewhere fun.”

“Just not on a spaceship, right?” I teased.

“I don’t know where you should take him. Just let him dream.”

I squeezed her hand. “I know just the place. Thanks for letting us cut out early. Today has been … well, not fun, but it was illuminating.”

“Run,” Cora said. “You guys have earned it.”

“Thanks. I’ll make sure he enjoys the rest of his weekend.”

ZACH’S MOOD WHEN I FOUND HIM IN the hallway could only be described as surly. He didn’t want to talk about his conversation with his father—he kept making muttering noises whenever Ryder was brought up—and he definitely didn’t want to listen to me go on and on about the breakthrough I was convinced I’d had with his mother. Rather than let him sulk, I snagged his keys and hopped in the driver’s seat of his Jaguar.

“Where are we going?” he asked as he slid into the passenger seat. “Don’t wreck my car.”

I waved off his worry. “We’re going on an adventure.”

“Is that code for stopping at Popeyes, picking up chicken, and spending the entire weekend in bed?” Zach looked hopeful. “Because I could be up for that.”

I laughed, grateful that some of the light was returning to his eyes. “Well, I considered that,” I admitted as I pointed us toward the strip. “I’m worried that if we’re in the penthouse that we’ll be interrupted.”

“We’ll put up a ‘do not disturb’ sign.”

“That won’t stop Rex.”

Zach hesitated. “Probably not,” he said finally. “He doesn’t know about us.”

I wanted to ask him what “us” he was referring to, because things felt as if they were shifting beyond what we’d agreed to before. I didn’t want to rock the boat, though. Not only was I having fun with Zach, but I also wanted him to get some emotional downtime. I could only think of one way to do that at present.

“What are the odds you have sleeping bags?” I asked when the silence had stretched on for almost a minute.

“Sleeping bags?” He made a face. “We don’t need those if we’re going to be naked in our room.”

“We’re not going to be naked in the penthouse.”

“Why not?” Zach looked pained.

“Because we’re going to be naked somewhere else.”

“Really?” Intrigue lit his features. “I like the sound of that.” He whipped out his phone, taking me by surprise. “We need a place where Rex doesn’t have an in. If we check in to the Bellagio say, or the Wynn, your brother will know we’re there before we even get our bags to the room.”

He hummed to himself as he searched. “ARIA is out. He dated three of the front desk workers there. MGM is out. The Cosmopolitan is out. Mandalay Bay and Treasure Island are out.” He turned thoughtful. “Maybe we should go off strip. That’s always frightening, though.”

“I’m not thinking of a hotel,” I said.

“Oh, an Airbnb.” He tapped the side of his head. “That’s the smart way to disappear. We can hole up there and have the weekend of our lives. I’ll try to get one with a hot tub. We can sit in there, have sex, and prune.”

“As lovely as that picture you’re painting is, I wasn’t thinking of that either.” I turned into a familiar parking lot and shut off the engine to the Jaguar. “How much do you trust me?”

Zach eyed the pot dispensary sign looming overhead. “This feels like a trick question, Livvie.”

I waited him out.

“I trust you,” he said in a soft voice when it became apparent I wasn’t going to say anything. “I trust you with everything I have.”

“Good, because I have an idea.”

Zach’s eyes went back to the sign. “You want to get high?”

“I was thinking we could get some indica, maybe a few gummies, whatever else strikes your fancy. Then we could hit up the camping goods store.”

That did it. Realization sparked in his eyes. “You want to go camping.”

“It’s the only way we can be certain we’ll be alone. Just you, me, a cooler, some pot, and a beautiful desert sky. We can do whatever we want?—”

“You better mean each other when you say that,” Zach groused.

“We can sleep in. We can talk. We can do whatever we want in the moment. All we really need is two sleeping bags, a tent, some food—I’m voting for Popeyes—a cooler, and forty-eight hours of us.”

Zach pressed his lips together, debating. “I’ve never been camping,” he said finally. He almost looked embarrassed.

“Well, I have. We’re not going to be roughing it. I thought we would go over to Lake Mead. There are designated campgrounds there. They have bathroom facilities so we don’t have to worry about that. Nobody will know us over there, though.”

Zach studied me for a long time. “If I tell you I’m afraid to camp, will you laugh at me?”

“No. I will protect you, though.”

“See, that makes me want to laugh at myself.” He drummed his fingers on his knee. “Basically you’re saying you want to get stoned and eat s’mores.”

Oh, I hadn’t even thought about that. “S’mores!” I raised my fist in the air.

He laughed, and it deflated a lot of the tension we were both feeling. “Fine. We’ll go camping. I want a decent tent, though.”

“Okay, but that’s going to be expensive.”

“I don’t care. I want a decent tent, one of those sleeping bags designed for two people, and an air mattress.”

“Wow, that’s really roughing it,” I drawled.

He ignored me. “I want good liquor, a cooler full of ice, whatever pot we can scrounge up, and s’mores. I also want a lot of sex.”

“Dude, we’re seriously going to spend the entire weekend talking about what you want to take camping instead of actually going camping.”

He grinned, and whatever happened with his father an hour before was already a memory. “I like this idea, Livvie. It will be a first for me.”

“So, you’re on board?”

“I’m on board.” He leaned in and pressed a hard kiss to my mouth. “Let’s do this. Let’s have some fun.”

I grinned. “Let’s dream,” I agreed.

He shot me a confused look. “I don’t know what that means.”

“You will,” I promised. “You’ll see when we get out there.”

“Then let’s do it. Although, what are we going to tell your brother?”

“I thought we would just leave him a note.”

“You don’t think that’s going to irritate him?”

“Isn’t there a Taylor Swift concert in town this weekend? He’s going to be too busy with her fans to worry about us.”

Zach brightened considerably. “You’re a freaking genius. Has anybody ever told you that?”

“No. It’s always nice to hear, though.”

He kissed me again. “This is going to be great.”

“Don’t get ahead of yourself,” I warned. “We still need to pitch a tent.”

His lips swished.

“Get your mind out of the gutter,” I intoned.

He laughed. “Come on, baby.” He shoved out and headed toward the dispensary. “Adventure awaits.”

I laughed as I followed him. This was the Zach I wanted to see every single day. This was the Zach who could be happy.

Which Zach would he ultimately become, though? The jury was still out on that one.