19. Carter

NINETEEN

CARTER

M y watery knees threatened to give out, my lungs wanted to burst, but still I blew on the photonic flute. The kaleidoscopic miasma swirling through the air told no cohesive story, nor did it paint a portrait or make an artistic statement.

It did, however, serve a purpose. Floran ran a crystal-tipped rod through the air over Arael's sweating, panting form, sparing a glance for the pattern on the ceiling now and again.

"Just keep watching the ceiling, Arael. Your lifemate says it will help with the pain."

The elderly Physicker couldn't quite hide his disdain for my unconventional pain management technique. The midwives, who did the real work of helping women through labor, however, had been open minded.

By creating specific patterns of color set to precise tempos, I could inhibit the pain receptors in Arael's neural network. It wouldn't eliminate the pain, but tamp it down considerably.

Combined with a native Masari root powder, Arael appeared far more comfortable than I would have thought possible.

"Men go to war. Women give birth," Pageus had told me earlier that day. "And the greater danger is faced by the women."

The thought of something going wrong gnawed away at me day and night all through her pregnancy. Now that the big day had finally arrived, I needed to play the photonic flute. It was the only way to keep myself sane.

"The child is crowning," cried one of the midwives. Floran moved his instrument lower and frowned thoughtfully.

"She is correct."

He didn't catch the glare the midwives gave him. I wondered if my social reforms had led to them viewing me in a better light, but I doubted it. The rivalries between castes were ingrained and hard to excise from Masari society.

"Push, Arael," cried one of the midwives. "You have nearly birthed the son of a chief."

Arael cried out, her face contorted in agony. She let out a long groan, and then collapsed back onto the bed. The midwives cut the snakelike umbilical cord. The child's tail covered its privates, meaning I couldn't tell whether I had a son or a daughter as of yet.

The midwives, knew, though, as did Arael.

"He's perfect," she said as they handed the child to her. Arael's eyes snapped over to meet my gaze. "Come and meet your son, Gro."

I came over to her side, my heart threatening to burst. The scrunched up, wrinkled face pressed against Arael's breast should have been ugly, but I saw with more than my eyes.

"He's beautiful."

"Yes, he is. What should we name him?"

"I'll have to think about it."

The Masari midwives and Floran all gasped at me.

"You must name the child before it's been in this world for an hour, or bad fortune will follow him for the rest of his life."

From time to time, I ran into a cultural nuance that surprised me. I had given some thought to names, and even discussed it with Arael but we'd never made a solid decision.

Everyone stared at me. On impulse, I blurted out the first of the discussed names that came to mind.

"Ajax. The boy's name is Ajax."

"Your father's name," Arael muttered, half conscious.

"Your father's name?" Floran blinked in confusion. "Your father's name was Tarou, was it not, Gro?"

I actually had no idea. This was the first I'd heard of it. I chose not to answer, and instead put an arm around my wife's shoulders. I stroked my finger across the child's cheek. It may have been a boy, but I thought Ajax looked a lot more like Arael than myself.

I'd been warned about the sleepless nights, and the endless weight of responsibility that came with having a child. However, nothing can truly prepare one for their first child.

I soon became accustomed to having vomit or other bodily fluids staining my clothes at any given time. My son never seemed to sleep, so I grew used to getting by on three to four hours of rest per night, if I were lucky.

According to the tribe, Ajax was a particularly noisy child. He also had zero fear, and constantly pushed the boundaries we tried to set for him. He learned how to climb down from his bed when he was only a month old. He stood, crawled, and walked far ahead of the usual development of Masari children.

I wondered if my dual nature might have something to do with his unusual development. Whatever the cause, he presented a lot of challenges to first time parents like ourselves.

And if I had thought him to be a handful before, he became triply when he started talking. Ajax wanted to know everything about everything. He plied every adult he could find with questions until they grew fed up and begged for mercy. As the chief's son, he was probably indulged a lot more than he would have been otherwise.

When Ajax reached five years of age, we officially abolished the Castes. There was some opposition, and two tribes dropped out of the Republic because they could not give up their traditional ways.

I returned home after a contentious Tribal Congress, lost in thought. The tribes we had lost controlled vast treasure troves of Precursor technology. Losing access to that tech would hurt. Though I no longer wanted to get back to my old life, I still wanted to improve the lives of the Masari in general, and my family in particular.

When I came through the door, Arael looked up at me from the divan with a knowing smile.

"You'd best be careful. There's a dangerous predator around."

"Oh, is there? Then I had best be extra careful, hadn't I?"

I crept through the living area. Ajax leaped out from behind the divan and wrapped his arms around my leg.

"I got you, Da!"

"Yes, you certainly did. You're going to make a great warrior someday."

"And a Sage, and an Engineer, and a midwife."

I chuckled and patted his head. He still looked more like Arael than me, at least in my opinion. He had her same twilight purple eyes.

"You really want to be a midwife?"

"I want to do everything."

"And I'm sure that you will, Ajax. I'm sure you will."

I ate dinner with my family, then relaxed on the divan with Arael while Ajax slowly drifted off to sleep between us. She squeezed my hand as I wrapped up my story about losing tribes because we ended the caste system.

"I'm sorry. I know you wanted to look at the artifacts they have at their disposal."

I shrugged and gave her a small smile.

"It's not the end of the world. Besides, it's not like I would have time to even look at the artifacts anyway, let alone study them. Ending the caste system means that I'm going to be quite busy for the time being."

Arael stared at me for a long moment, then turned her gaze on the fire.

"I hope you won't be that busy. At least not in about eight months or so."

"Why? What happens in eight…"

My voice trailed off as I noticed the glint in her eyes.

"We're having another baby?"

She nodded, then looked at me.

"Are you happy?"

"Of course I'm happy."

I held her close, then put my son to bed so Arael and I could properly celebrate. I returned to work the next day, forging the new direction of the Republic.

My second child was born during a terrible thunderstorm. She was a breech birth, and Arael nearly died, but we all made it through.

Liara was a lot quieter than Ajax. But she was also a lot smarter. I thought she looked more like Gro than Arael, but it was a toss up. I tried my best to split my time between the chieftainship and my family, but it proved challenging.

It took years to incorporate the changes wrought by demolishing the caste system. It took even longer for Masari culture to reap the benefits. Ajax celebrated his twelfth birthday on the same day that a former Shunned Sage discovered how to expand an antigravity field enough to get a ship into orbit.

It was only an unmanned ship, but still, quite the achievement. I realized that we would likely see the ability to achieve faster than light travel within my…within Gro's lifetime.

Masari lived somewhat longer than humans, with an expectancy of two hundred years or so. Because of differences in their metabolism and anatomy, Masari enjoy good health and mobility until their final decade or so.

Still, it was hard to watch as Zey and Pageus slowly succumbed to Father Time. Pageus was replaced as War Chief by Nikor, and spent his time training warriors rather than fighting himself.

Zey's faculties left him before his body gave out. His grandchildren attended to his needs until the bitter end.

Twenty turns of the seasons after I had awakened in Gro's body, both the great chiefs were dead. I found myself the elder, rather than the stripling at council meetings.

I still came back home to my beautiful lifemate. Other things had changed, however. My son Ajax moved out, announcing his attention to start his own family. Liria spoke more and more of joining a Sage's college some eight hundred miles from the village's usual migratory path.

My life changed, and stayed the same. I worked hard to improve the lives of the Masari, and make my family happy.

If the cost was the life of one petty, angry, and small minded human scientist, then so be it. I would willingly pay the price again and again for just one year with my family. I thought losing my old life was a bargain.

When Liria left for the Sage's college, I stood in my home, which now felt so terribly small and empty. I held my lifemate in my arms and waited for her to weep. Yet, she did not.

"Are you all right, my love?"

I lifted her chin, looking deep into her eyes. She smiled, and gave a slight nod.

"I'm good, beloved."

"You're not worried that you will be lonely without the children?"

"Oh, no, I'm going to enjoy the peace and quiet while I have the chance. You should, too."

I cocked my head to the side.

"What do you mean, I should too?"

I followed her gaze as it dropped to her midsection. I put my hand on her belly and laughed, joy surging through my heart.

"Again?"

"Again. Don't worry, beloved. We should be experts this time."

I sighed and bent over to kiss her on the belly.

"Somehow, I doubt it will be that easy, but I can't wait to find out."