CHAPTER THIRTEEN

Two weeks later

C ADE GROANED , clinging to his sanity, the pleasure threatening to burst through his veins like wildfire as he thrust heavily into Charlotte, barely aware of the power shower thundering down on them both.

Not yet. Not yet. Hold on.

His mind blurred, his knees trembling, his fingers digging into her hips as he held them both upright with the last of his strength, adjusting his thrusts to stroke the spot inside her he knew would take her over.

Her body tightened on his, her sob of surrender triggering his own orgasm as he crashed over at last. He groaned, the climax intensifying as he sank his face into her wet hair, drowning in brutal sensation. Again.

How could their chemistry still be so damn strong? So damn frantic? When they’d been making love like rabbits for two weeks straight. Every morning, every evening and any stolen moment in between...

He stood, letting the vicious afterglow wash over him, only vaguely aware of the water jets still pummelling his back. Until she shifted, reviving from the titanic orgasm first.

‘We should get out of here before we dissolve,’ she murmured.

He let out a rough chuckle. And how could she still captivate him? When he’d been living with her for three weeks?

Shouldn’t he be bored by now? Eager to consider other living arrangements?

She was over the morning sickness, hadn’t had an episode since that first one in New York. She didn’t need him to watch over her so closely.

But not only couldn’t he keep his hands off her in the bedroom—and everywhere else in the apartment, even the damn kitchen counter yesterday evening—he had become addicted to her company, too.

They ate together each evening now, and although her attempts to pry more details out of him about his past had started to become problematic, he’d deflected them by exploiting their voracious appetite for one another whenever she got too close. It was bad enough she knew the truth about his mother. He didn’t want her to know any more.

Luckily, their lovemaking gave him an easy out from the probing queries, the questions he had no intention of answering...and in the last few days, she’d stopped asking them.

But that wasn’t the only cause for concern.

He found it next to impossible now not to return from work early—or surprise her at her workspace in the Ferry Building so he could escort her back to the apartment in the evenings—because he enjoyed spending time with her so much. He loved hearing about the latest news on her commissions, checking out the designs she was working on—not that he knew a damn thing about haute couture. Her enthusiasm was captivating, and he was proud of what she’d achieved in such a short space of time.

‘Water off,’ he demanded, grateful for the voice-activated controls. Then lifted her from him.

She left the cubicle, and he took the opportunity to check out the subtle changes caused by her pregnancy before she had wrapped a towel around her naked body.

Her breasts had become fuller and more sensitive, and although he couldn’t see a bump yet, her waist had thickened slightly. Although that could be the food he’d been feeding her every chance he got. Charlotte had a voracious appetite for his cooking too, and he loved to watch her eat.

But what he enjoyed more was the surprise on her face when he made the effort for her.

Kind of weird, because he’d never been a nurturer, but he couldn’t seem to shake the feeling of connection. Their upbringings couldn’t have been more different—but in many ways they’d survived the same loss. When she’d talked about losing her mama too, the vulnerability on her face had stirred something inside him he couldn’t explain.

However wealthy her folks had been, she had grown up without their emotional support. But while he’d built a wall around himself so he didn’t need the validation of anyone but himself, he sensed she had never done that.

It made him ashamed for having once dismissed her as spoilt and entitled when she’d been the opposite. But her open, generous nature also made him wary. Was he becoming too dependent on her company? That kinetic connection? The spectacular chemistry? Should he be weaning himself off her before her pregnancy became more pronounced? He couldn’t afford to get suckered into needing anyone. He’d been there as a kid, and it had nearly destroyed him.

He strolled out of the shower, feeling the familiar throb of awareness when her gaze skimmed over him. Colour heightened her cheeks as she looked away again.

‘I should probably head to the other bathroom to get ready for tonight,’ she said, all business. ‘What’s the dress code again?’

‘Smart casual, I guess,’ he said, trying to remember what event it was and why he had accepted the invitation—when all he wanted to do right now was have her again.

He hooked a towel around his waist, but when she headed past him, he grabbed her hand. ‘We don’t have to go if you’re tired.’

She blushed, then smiled—the dazzling smile which always made his heartbeat slow.

‘Hmm...’ she said, stroking her chin like a professor discovering the meaning of life. ‘Is that a Landry euphemism for “Why don’t I jump you again so I can tire you out even more?”’

He tugged her into his arms, enjoying the way she always challenged him, the hunger increasing. ‘You got me,’ he murmured.

‘Not gonna happen, Galahad,’ she said, dancing free, still smiling provocatively. She took a few more steps back as she wrapped the towel tighter. ‘This is another great opportunity to show off one of my creations, which I am not about to throw away because you are completely insatiable. So have a cold shower and I’ll see you in the lobby in twenty looking fabulous.’

He swore under his breath, really wishing he hadn’t accepted the invite. He didn’t want to share her for the rest of the evening with anyone.

He forced himself to ignore the thought.

The plan—such as it was—had never been to keep her forever. It was time he started getting a handle on this obsession.

But as she walked away, the yearning gripped his chest regardless. And it occurred to him it was going to be a lot harder than he had ever thought it would be to let her go. Eventually.

She turned at the door.

‘Changed your mind?’ he quipped.

‘Nope,’ she said despite the flush of arousal. ‘I forgot to tell you. My first sonogram is next week. Dr Chen has scheduled it for the Friday before Labor Day. I thought...’ She hesitated, panic stabbed under his breastbone.

‘Is there a problem?’ Was there something she wasn’t telling him? ‘With the baby?’

‘Oh, no, not at all,’ she said. Relief made him feel light-headed as she continued. ‘I just thought you might like to put it in your diary...so you can come, too.’

He opened his mouth ready to say he’d be there. He wanted to see the life growing inside her. He’d thought about it often, especially late at night, when she was sleeping and the thoughts he couldn’t control bombarded him.

Would his child— their child—be a boy or a girl? Would it have her charisma? His drive? What would they call it?

But right alongside those thoughts had been the yearning which he recognised from long ago. The desire to belong, to be a part of a family, to have someone care for him, the way his own mother never had. The yearning which had never been fulfilled. And could destroy him if he gave in to it again.

With that yearning came the memory of fear and panic, the scent of floor cleaner and the gentle voice of the guard asking, Where are your folks, boy?

He swallowed the knee-jerk answer and took a mental step back.

‘You sure that’s smart?’ he asked, trying to think of a viable excuse not to go. ‘We don’t want to get photographed going into an obstetric clinic together. Because that would reignite the press attention we don’t want.’

‘I see your point,’ Charley said carefully. Even though she didn’t.

It had taken her days to mention the appointment to him. Because she wanted so desperately for him to come. But she had been waiting for an opportunity to mention it, and it hadn’t materialized.

Cade never willingly spoke about the baby.

She’d tried to convince herself that was normal. That men probably didn’t really connect with their baby until it felt more tangible to them, more real.

And he seemed invested in the pregnancy itself—insisting on cooking nutritious and delicious meals for her. And always asking her how she was feeling. She’d noticed the careful way he caressed her breasts when they made love, aware of how sensitive they had become. And she loved the possessive way he rested his palm on her belly, where their baby grew, when he thought she was asleep.

So many times she had wanted to turn over and ask him what he was feeling, what he was thinking. But she’d held back, scared to risk breaking cover. All her old insecurities told her she might not get the answer she wanted, so it was better not to ask.

They had time, lots of time to deal with the reality of becoming parents before the baby arrived. They’d only been together for three weeks, and they weren’t a couple in the traditional sense.

But despite all those careful qualifications, her determination not to let his reticence bother her, she could feel the chill running through her at his blank expression now.

For a moment there, she’d seen the flicker of excitement in the deep blue of his irises. And hope had blossomed like a flower in her chest. Why had she been such a coward about telling him? Why had she avoided talking about the baby, too?

But the excitement had disappeared so swiftly, she wasn’t sure if she had imagined it.

She didn’t want to be needy, to seem insecure. Things were good between them. Things were great. In many ways they’d become friends as well as lovers in the last few weeks.

She loved it when he touched her. Adored indulging the raw passion. But she found his attention even more intoxicating. She looked forward now to the conversations they shared each evening. He’d shown genuine interest in her business—and had offered her some invaluable advice, while also escorting her to numerous events which would give her creations exposure.

But she couldn’t contain her dismay at his reasoning now. The press attention which had forced them together in the first place had died down a lot in the last month. Ever since they’d appeared at the High Line event together, the media had lost interest and moved on to the next big celebrity scandal... After all, Cade Landry wasn’t a one date wonder any more, and she wasn’t a wild child. Now they had shacked up together.

‘The media could just as easily photograph me going to the clinic on my own. And put two and two together,’ she said, deciding to press. She didn’t want him being prevented from this seminal moment in their baby’s life because of something which was unlikely to happen. ‘But anyway, the only time we’ve been photographed recently is at public events. I don’t think we’re much of a story any more.’

‘I guess,’ he said, but she could still see the reluctance in his eyes.

Maybe she was making a big deal about nothing? Whether he came to the scan or not didn’t have to mean anything. Perhaps his reluctance to attend the appointment really was just about logistics.

And anyhow, why did it matter how involved he wanted to be at this point? They were still months and months away from the birth. They hadn’t even spoken yet about where she would be living when that happened. In theory, she would be back in the UK. But that was another conversation she’d avoided.

‘How about you let me think about it,’ he said carefully. ‘I’ve got to be in Manhattan on Labor Day itself. And I may have to head to the East Coast a couple days ahead of schedule.’

‘No problem.’ She forced herself to smile. The jaunty I’m-all-right-Jack smile she’d perfected as a child whenever her mother looked right through her as if she wasn’t there. ‘I’ll see you in twenty, then,’ she said, and fled.

But as she retreated to the guest room—where she kept the array of designs for the public appearances they made—and put together a suitable outfit, she didn’t feel her usual excitement about showing off her work. And when they arrived at the exclusive garden party in the Presidio, and her hand rested on Cade’s forearm as he led her into the event, she felt the bitter pang of loneliness she remembered from so much of her childhood, even though he was right beside her.