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Chapter 29

29

Harlow

It’s not in my nature to trust. If something seems too good to be true, it undoubtedly is. The three of us in a real relationship… That feels the very essence of fantasy. We’re too messy, too fractured as individuals. One of us will fuck it up.

But not tonight.

And maybe not tomorrow.

Maybe we’ll have just enough time to sink into the possibility of us before it’s ripped away.

As I lay between Abel and Eli, their breathing low and even in the darkness, I don’t know how to battle the thought of what the future brings. I want this. I want this so bad, I have to fight not cling to these men until they have bruises of my fingerprints in their skin. At the same time, I know that giving myself over to this is simply a faster route to heartbreak.

We will fuck it up. How can we not when we’re all still so new to the idea of happiness?

My breathing is coming too fast, too harsh. I think I might be panicking. The hysterical thought rolls through my head that I won’t have to wait for my heart to break because I’m having a heart attack right now. Surely that’s what’s causing this horrible pain in my chest, the tightness that I can’t inhale around. It’s the only thing that makes sense.

I start to sit up, the need to move overpowering thought and reason, but both men tighten their arms around me. Abel shifts closer and props his chin on the top of my head, a strange sort of anchor, while Eli moves until his face is pressed to my neck, his breath a warm and steady exhale against my skin.

They anchor me, but it’s not enough.

Here, in the dark, it’s horrifyingly easy to spill my fears onto them. “We’ll fuck this up.”

“We’ll stumble.” I feel Abel’s words against my back as much as I hear them.

I can’t twist to look at him, not with them effectively pinning me between them, but it wouldn’t matter anyway. I can’t see him. “That’s what I said.”

“Stumbling is not failing.”

Eli presses a kiss to my throat. “We won’t fail, Harlow. Not now that we’ve decided on this path.”

If I could draw a full breath, I might scream at them for being so calm, so collected right now. “One day ago, you were ready to literally kill each other. That kind of hate doesn’t just go away.”

“Neither does the friendship we had for twenty-eight years.” Eli shifts down and presses another kiss to my upper chest. “Like Abel said, there will be stumbles. We’re human, and we’re bound to fuck up. The stumbles matter less than how we deal with them.”

Abel strokes his hand down my side to squeeze my hip. “Don’t shoot us in the knee before we’re even out of the gate, sweetheart. Give us a chance to prove that this is possible.”

Their calm, the weight of them against me, the feel of their skin sliding against mine… It starts to slow the frantically spinning thoughts in my head. The tightness in my chest doesn’t entirely abate, but the urge to scream fades a little. “I’m afraid.”

Afraid that I already care too much. It doesn’t matter if this falls apart in a week, a month, a year. Or if it falls apart in ten minutes. I’ve loved Eli for years, and there’s no denying that I’ve gone and fallen for Abel. There is no way I leave this situation intact.

Strangely enough, the realization settles me the rest of the way. The worst has already happened. I’m emotionally compromised. There’s no reason to fear it happening because it already has happened. Now all that’s left is to ride this roller coaster to the finish and hope it doesn’t hurtle me off a cliff.

I take a slow breath. “Okay.” Another breath, slower yet. “Okay,” I repeat.

It’s only then I understand what’s happened. I frown into the darkness. “Neither of you were asleep.”

“Hard to sleep when you’re tense as a brick between us,” Abel rumbles.

“I know you, Harlow.” Eli shifts closer yet, sliding his leg between mine. It’s not exactly sexual, but I’d have to be dead not to react to him touching me. Especially with Abel still tracing idle patterns on my hip and outer thigh. Eli presses another light kiss to my throat. “You don’t trust it when things take a turn for the good.”

I swallow hard. “Can you blame me? My track record proves that it’s better to expect the other shoe to drop than to believe the situation is as it first appears.”

“No, I don’t blame you.” His breath ghosts against the skin damp from his kiss, raising goose bumps over my skin and causing me to shiver. Eli’s thigh slides higher to press against my pussy. “How can I when I’m part of the history you hold up to come to this conclusion?”

I open my mouth to deny it, but I can’t lie to him. Easier to say nothing at all, but that’s the coward’s way out. “It took the two of us to get here.”

“And it will take the three of us to get out again.” His hand slides past me, and I don’t have to see to know he’s drifting his fingers over Abel’s arm. “We should sleep.”

“In a little while.” Abel moves, wedging his free arm under me so he can reach around and cup one of my breasts.

I give a little breathy laugh. “You can’t solve everything with sex.”

“This isn’t about solving things.” He plucks my nipple, and I instinctively arch back against him. He grabs my hip and pulls me back even farther, until his cock is pressed against my ass. “This is about bolstering the foundations. Sex is the one time none of us are fucking this up. We’d be fools to ignore that asset.”

Eli’s rough laugh hardly sounds like him. “Sounds to me like you just want to get your dick wet again.”

“With the two of you in my bed, can you blame me?”

“No.” Eli slides down my body. Abel brings his other hand up so he’s cupping both my breasts, pressing them together in a way that feels like he’s offering them to Eli, who lavishes my breasts with kisses until I’m writhing and reaching for him.

Abel releases my breasts from one hand and snakes it between my thighs to stroke my pussy. I jolt, and then Eli’s hand is there, too. They take turns toying with me, squeezing my thighs, dragging their fingers through my folds, spearing me with one finger and then two, and then both of them fuck me at once. It’s overwhelming in the best way possible. Abel begins circling my clit while Eli wedges three fingers into me and, after a little adjustment, flicks his fingertips against my G-spot.

I’m trapped between their larger bodies, trapped with their hands on my pussy, trapped by pleasure. And just when I think it can’t get any hotter, Abel’s voice rumbles in my ear. “You’re ours, sweetheart. No matter how bumpy the road gets, that’s the fucking truth. And tonight, we’re going to prove it to you.”

Eli nips the underside of my breast. “Ours,” he agrees. He keeps up that agonizingly good stroking against my G-spot. Abel shifts his touch, lightly rubbing back and forth over my clit with the length of his blunt fingers.

I open my mouth to say… I don’t even know what. Instead a moan erupts from my lips, and then I’m coming, clamping down around Eli’s fingers.

The bastards don’t stop.

The orgasm swells to new heights, my body locking muscle by muscle and turning my lungs to lead. I make a gasping sound that might be a curse, and then it sucks me under entirely.

Eli and Abel do one of those silent communication things again. I don’t know how they manage it when we’re all barely more than shadow, but they turn me in their arms so that Eli is at my back, and Abel pulls my leg up around his hip.

Eli drags his hand up the back of my thigh to the small of my back. Such a small touch, but so fucking tender that I can barely stand it. Just another indication of how well we’re balanced when we get out of each other’s way. Soft and hard and intense and sweet. We can have all of it. Eli kisses my neck and presses a fingertip to my ass. “Let us claim you, Harlow.”

It takes my pleasure-drugged brain several moments to understand his meaning. “Both of you?”

“Yeah.”

I’m already nodding before I can think better of it. “Yes.”

Eli rolls away for brief moment, and then he’s back, pushing a lubed finger into my ass. “Let us do all the work.”

I make a sound that might be a laugh. “That’s probably for the best. I can’t feel my legs.”

Abel cups my chin and lifts my face to his. “Better get used to that, sweetheart.” He kisses me as Eli pushes his cock into my ass.

We’ve done anal enough times that I know the drill. I shiver and relax into the penetration. He goes slow, working into me in short strokes that take him a little deeper each time, until he’s finally sheathed to the hilt. He releases a shaky exhale. “You good?”

I shift back against him, rocking a little, and grin when he curses in response. “Yeah, I’m good.” Better than good. Now that the aftermath of my orgasm is easing, my desire ramps up again. I stroke my hand down Eli’s arm. “This isn’t going to be the best position for this.”

“I know.” He gives a rough chuckle. “Hang on.” He bands an arm across my hip and rolls onto his back, taking me with him.

Abel follows us, ending up kneeling between our spread thighs. I can’t see his face clearly, but the way he drags his hand down the center of my body feels possessive in the extreme. He pauses to cup my pussy, idly pushing two fingers into me, and then his hand is gone, and Eli jerks under me. No doubt Abel is playing with his balls.

Eli curses. “If you keep doing that, I’m going to come before we even get going.”

“Have to work on that restraint.” But Abel says it almost kindly, almost like a promise.

He wraps his fist around his cock and presses it to my entrance. The slightest movement forward and he’s pushing inside me. Both he and Eli are large enough on their own, but with both of them inside me…

It’s almost too much.

I can’t catch my breath. “Fuck, fuck, fuck.”

Abel hesitates, his cock half buried inside me. “Sweetheart, talk to me.”

“You’re too big.”

He goes still for one eternal moment and then laughs. It’s a deep, happy sound, and I’ve never heard him make it before. He leans down and catches my mouth in a rough kiss. “You know how to turn a man’s head.”

“I’m serious.”

“I know.” He hesitates. “Do you want to stop?”

“Fuck no.”

“Thought so.” He gives another low laugh. “Eli.”

Apparently no further words are needed because Eli starts kissing my neck, zeroing in on the spot that makes me go melty, and reaches between me and Abel to lightly circle my clit. I’m still so sensitive that I can’t take much more pressure than he’s giving me, but after a tense moment, I give myself over to it. To all of it.

Still, Abel doesn’t move for several long seconds. “Ready for more?”

Eli sets his teeth against my neck. “You can take it, can’t you, Harlow? Just let him sink in a little more. All this cock, just for you.”

“I can take it.” The words burst out, an instinctive response. I don’t want this to stop. I don’t ever want this to stop.

“Good girl.” Then Abel is slowly sliding the rest of the way into me. I fight to relax, to simply let him do the work, but a steady pressure begins to build to the beat of my racing heart. They hold perfectly still, caging me between their bigger bodies and, gods, it’s almost too much.

Almost, but not quite.

Slowly, oh so slowly, I catch my breath. “I’ve got it.”

Abel begins to move, fucking me in slow strokes. From the way Eli’s hands tighten on my hips, he can feel every inch, too. Abel gives me a wicked grin. “Next time we do this, we’re both going to fuck you, sweetheart.”

“You’re both fucking me right now.”

“No, we’re not.” He executes another slow thrust, filling me again. Over and over again. It’s too much, far too much, and then suddenly it’s not enough. I start moving to meet his thrusts, which has me sliding on Eli’s cock in my ass and, holy shit, that feels good. But it’s still not enough.

“Please.” I sob out the word.

Abel moves first, guiding us onto our sides and shoving one of my legs up and wide. He holds me easily and glances over my shoulder at Eli. They begin to move as one, easing out of me, leaving me horrendously empty, and then filling me up with both of them. I’m helpless to do anything but take it, and I’m barely able to do even that.

Between one stroke and the next, I come. I orgasm so hard, my toes curl and my foot cramps. Eli’s seated in my ass, and he curses, barely pulling out of me before his come lashes my back. Abel isn’t far behind, pounding into me and then orgasming with a curse. He kisses me and then leans over me to kiss Eli. “Shower, and then let’s switch the sheets.”

“We’re going to have to buy more sheets if we keep doing this,” I mutter.

“Worth it.” Eli stretches in one long move, and then he’s tugging me up and to the bathroom. Abel follows us into the shower a few minutes later, and when we return to the bed, it’s to find he’s already replaced the sheets.

This time, when we all lie down together, I’m too exhausted and content to do anything but sleep.

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