Chapter 1

Nausea rolls through me as the landau pitches from side to side. It's not through any fault of the driver, of that, I'm sure. However, it doesn't help the stab of fear rolling through me as I glance outside to watch the trees go past.

After the forced ride from Hades with Mister Beaumont, every step into a carriage of any sort is cause for alarm. My heart pounds so hard in my chest I fear it will leap from me and onto the other passengers sharing this mode of transportation. Glancing about at the myriad of faces, I force the dread back down where it belongs.

Besides, it wouldn't be good to upend the contents of my stomach all over the dowager duchess to my side or my new siblings in front. The girls blink up at me, their wide eyes growing even larger as they stare at my face. No doubt I must look a fright. Sliding my hand over my stomach, I clench my fingers inward, willing breakfast to stay down.

Next to me, the older woman reaches over to pat my knee, a glimmer of pity shining in her expression. I don't want or need anyone's compassion; however, having a warm, comforting hand certainly doesn't go amiss. I take her wizened fingers in my grasp and hold on, allowing her strength to pour into me.

Guilt slams into me hard, nearly edging out the panic threatening to bubble up to the surface. The only reason we're making this trip is because of her poor health. I should be attending to her and not the other way around. Glancing back, I notice a hint of a smile tilting up her lips.

In truth, these last few days, she's seemed in much brighter spirits than when I was first introduced to her at my marriage breakfast. She looked so pale, so frail. Now, it seems as if she glows from the inside out with some strange mirth she keeps to herself.

Perhaps it's relief at going back home to the country? Honestly, it causes the guilt to ease just a touch. Perhaps everyone worried for nothing. With the way she looks right now, I surmise she might have many years left in her.

It's my prayer, seeing as I've had far more brushes with death than I care to think about. A shudder wracks my body as the phantom pain from the broken bond twists my insides. It's far better now that both William and I have claimed each other, but some days the agony threatens to steal my breath.

Turning my attention away from such morose thoughts, I look at the scenery as it goes by, repeating to myself that it's not the same. These aren't the same trees, these aren't the same roads, and my travel companions certainly aren't the same.

I watch as my new brother, the Duke of Blackport, rides alongside us, his stance rigid in the saddle. I can't see his face, but his body speaks of an alert and watchful eye. Truthfully, since William cannot escort us, I'm happy to have his brother instead.

With him traveling with us, no harm will come to his mother or sisters, and by proxy, that means I am safe as well. I should be able to allow ghosts to lie, knowing he will fight to the death if need be to keep us safe. Still though, I cannot keep the tingle of awareness away for any longer than the span of a few minutes.

Hopefully, once we're out of this dreaded landau, I can finally breathe again. In front of me, the sisters hold their heads together, tittering laughs drifting from their side. Next to them, the new governess grips her skirt, her fingers digging in as if holding on for dear life. Strange, but she seems just as ill at ease as I do.

"Do you not travel often?" I inquire, desperate to put my mind on other things.

She looks over at me, her light brown eyes darkening for a second as a waft of fear drifts through the carriage. Both sisters stop whatever it is they are doing and look over at her, curiosity evident in their eyes. Again, that sense of unease drips from the governess as she looks at their questioning gazes.

"Forgive me," I murmur, sliding back further into the seat. "It was not my intent to put you on the spot."

"Nonsense," the dowager duchess cries, her smile growing wider. "‘Tis far too long of a trip not to be regaled with some tale of mystery and woe. Tell us then, child, what has you so uncomfortable?"

Red tinges her cheeks as she glances out the window, only to train her gaze swiftly back onto her hands. "Forgive me, Your Grace," she whispers. "I have never been in the presence of someone as great as you before. I- I find myself a little unprepared."

"My child," the older woman chuckles. "You will find me to be far more affable than most. I did not garner my title by being one of high esteem. In fact, I started out much like you, a governess to someone in a very high position."

At those words, the younger woman glances up, something akin to hope shining in her eyes. Again, she lets her gaze dart out the window, and for a moment, I wonder if this has anything to do with Blackport. To my knowledge, they haven't even met properly. Could she already have designs on a stranger?

Then again, I knew nothing of my William, and yet my heart knew in an instant he was the Alpha for me. I will, however, keep my lips sealed in case I'm incorrect in my line of thinking. It could very well easily be that she looks to him as a guardian of sorts and doesn't wish to alarm him with her troubles?

Leaning forward, I give her a soft smile and a conspiratorial wink. "Do not fret. I am sure no one outside this carriage can hear your tale. The pounding of the horses" hooves should drown out any scandalous stories you might have."

"A scandal?" the older sister, Lady Margaret, pipes up, her blue eyes shining. "Oh, I do love a good intrigue!"

The dowager duchess gives a loud harrumph as she leans back in her seat. "Not at your age, you should not."

"It's not fair," she pouts, crossing her arms. "You never allow me any fun."

"Fun is for when you're married off to a respectable man, and not before."

The governess and I exchange glances, the ghost of a smile tilting our lips as the mother and daughter go at it. Thankfully, Lady Margaret knows nothing of my fall from grace, or else she'd be absolutely besotted with the scandal which I found myself embroiled in. As it is, it will remain my dirty little secret, never even leaving me on my deathbed.

"Fine. If you do not wish to allow me any fun, I shall turn the conversation to something far more sinister. I have heard tales that highwaymen are in abundance, traversing these roads in search of gold and trinkets." There's a smug look of satisfaction on Lady Margaret's lips as she leans back and crosses her arms.

If my face is anything like the governess's, we both look pale and shaky with fright.

"Hush, child," the dowager duchess chides, shaking her head. "We are perfectly safe. Why do you think your brother rides next to us? And the men controlling the landau, do you think they're merely for show? Every man accompanying us has our safety at heart. Nothing will happen."

With another huff, Lady Margaret slumps just a touch. "Of course nothing will happen. Nothing ever happens."

Sighing, I glance back out the window, my heart thumping in time with the wheels carrying us away. "Take it from someone who knows. Nothing happening is usually a good thing."

"I knew it!" she cries out, sitting at attention once more. "Something did happen to you! I knew the rumors had to be true."

Once more, fear's icy grip wraps around my heart and squeezes. "There are rumors?" My fingers shake as I lay my hand across my chest.

An odd haze impedes my vision as it crosses over my eyes, making everything fuzzy for a moment. My insides flip, as if my body is rolling about, turning feet over head. However, the instant my terror becomes too much, a familiar warmth spreads through my body.

My love. Are you well? William's deep tenor rolls through my brain, driving away the madness with his overwhelming heat.

F- forgive me, I answer back, my vision clearing enough to see four pairs of eyes staring at me, concern wavering in their depths. Your sister has heard rumors about me, and I panicked.

Has she said what these rumors are? Perhaps you can dispel them? If not, I will be on my way shortly and can address them when we meet up.

No, I admit, shame twisting my insides. I didn't even get the chance. I felt faint before she could say more.

His fingers brush along the inside of my mind, bringing a soft sigh to my lips. They wrap around me in a tight hug, firm enough to bring all the jagged splinters of my soul back together as one. The love he feels for me pours in, reminding me I'm not alone.

"What do you suppose she's doing?" Lady Elizabeth whispers to her older sister.

"I'm not sure, but it looks odd. As if she's staring right through us. Perhaps we are now ghosts? Specters only to be talked of but never seen?"

Their voices sound muddled and thick, as if I'm hearing it underwater. Shaking my head, I do my best to bring myself back to the present, just in time for Lady Elizabeth to shriek.

"I do not wish to be a specter. I am a flesh and blood girl. Please, Mama, I do not want to be a ghost."

"Enough," the dowager duchess grinds out, her gaze flitting over to the governess. "Are you sure you still wish to be in our employ? Seeing as the girls are prone to theatrics and hysterics?"

"I bet she's talking to William," Lady Margaret bursts in, her lips tilting up into a smug smile.

Lady Elizabeth looks about the landau, her gaze looking at every nook and cranny. "But he is not here, and I did not hear her speak?"

"You"re too young to understand." This time, Lady Margaret's voice matches her haughty demeanor.

"As are you," the dowager duchess counters. "Where do you even get such ideas?"

"Mama, it's not as if I'm blind. When Father was still with us, I saw how you both would stare off into the distance, and then smile as if some lark passed between you. Since Catherine is now married as well, I can only assume she's doing the same. In fact, I would surmise that it's the act of marriage which opens up this strange portal between husband and wife."

The older woman and I exchange a glance. If only it were that simple. Resisting the urge to touch the mark over my heart, I mourn the idea that all it takes is a simple act of nuptials. If that were the case, I still wouldn't feel as if a piece of me was missing, ripped out when William had the bastard who kidnapped and marked me executed.

Never once did I say any sort of thing that would constitute binding myself to that loathsome man in marriage, and yet, here I am, still mourning the part of me he stole. Wrapping my arms about my waist, I continue to listen as Lady Margaret pours out her theories on marriage and the boons it brings with it.

Thankfully, most of them are incorrect, laughable musings proving she's still very much an innocent. It's what I would want for her. I revel in the idea that she knows nothing of the depravity which can take a woman and strip her of everything she holds dear.

Turning my gaze out the window, I watch as more trees go by. If only I had stayed behind and come up with William, but he insisted I go. Not only would I have had my mate alongside me, keeping me safe and in his care, but we could start our honeymoon early. With everything that's happened, we've been in a whirlwind since coming back to London.

Though I know William in the most carnal sense, I still feel as if I could learn more about the man himself—his likes, his dislikes, his passions… Well, the passions which don't include ravaging me every moment he can.

A different warmth runs through me as arousal threatens to make me squirm. I cannot allow these thoughts to continue. Not when four other ladies can no doubt smell it. Even now, as I glance over at the dowager duchess, she smiles at me with that knowing grin of hers.

Oh, the humiliation. It's enough to drive all thoughts of William from my mind. "Pray tell, Lady Margaret. Which rumors have you heard?"

She turns away, unease flitting from her. "I do not wish for you to be wroth with me."

"I doubt you can ever do anything to cause my anger to burn toward you. Besides, I have a younger sister of my own, and I know they can be prone to teasing."

"I-" she pauses and looks over at the dowager duchess. "I heard you were kidnapped. That William had to save you from the clutches of a madman."

Grief strikes at my heart as I take in her unsure expression. "And what else," I manage to croak out, needing to know the worst of it.

"And that you and he are a rare love match. Is that why you can talk to him in your mind? Mama? You too?"

With a sigh, I sit back, relief flooding through my veins. If this is all the rumors are saying, then I can live with that. "And that's all?" I question.

She nods, her eyes holding no trace of guile in those bright blue depths. "That's all."

"Then let me reassure you. Unfortunately, the rumors are true. I was stolen away by a terrible man, but rest assured that he can no longer hurt me or anyone else. Your brother saw to that."

Next to her, Lady Elizabeth beams. "William is so strong and brave. I'm happy he saved you."

Smiling down at the younger girl, I nod. "As am I. I truly don't know what I would do without him."

Next to me, the dowager duchess sniffs and dabs at her eyes. "A true love match is rare, my darling girls. What your father and I had, what Catherine now shares with William, is what I want for you both. But do not let that cloud your judgment when it comes to suitors. Do not allow your minds to run away with thoughts of love. It will come in time."

Again, she pats my knee, giving me a watery smile. I grab her hand in my own, drawing on her strength. Since my mother and sister are no doubt back at Overton, she's stepped in as a surrogate for me. I couldn't ask for a better mother, a proxy in my own Mama's stead. She has treated me with nothing but kindness, causing my heart to ache as she turns from me and coughs.

The landau is quiet, save for the rattling sound as the dowager duchess continues to wheeze. We all look at her, our souls hurting. It will only be a matter of time, but hopefully, it will not be so soon. Closing my eyes, I send up two small prayers.

May the dowager duchess find peace and healing back at Whitmore Manor, and may William close the distance fast and get to us. Already, I ache, desperation flooding my veins like lead. It's not just because I worry about his mother, though that is a large part.

The distance eats at me, sends shafts of pain into my heart. With us being parted, it allows the festering wound of that illicit bond to open, driving pain into my heart until I can barely breathe. It helps to feel William within my soul, but soon, I'll need to touch him, to remind myself he's here with me physically.

Soon, my love, he whispers into my mind, driving out the agony threatening to overwhelm me. I'll be by your side by this evening. Just hold on a bit longer.