Chapter 11

11

E dina was returning home from the village school two days after the confrontation with Aidan—she could no longer think him as Lewis—thinking about him and feeling immensely guilty. She should never have taken him up to the turrets, she realised, because the fear on his face had been sad to behold, and she was ashamed of herself because she had behaved so cruelly.

She had knocked on his door that night intending to apologise, but he had dismissed her without a hearing. Having thought about it, Edina did not think she could blame him. The way she had acted had almost been an act of torture.

Edina had not seen hide nor hair of him since then, but she put it down to his habit of isolating himself in nature or losing himself in the company of the guards or the huntsmen occasionally. However, on the second morning after their confrontation when she still had not encountered him, she asked Lady Findlay where to find him, still being careful to call him Lewis.

"He has caught a little chill," she replied. "And I know why. The stable lads were doing a lot of coughing and spluttering the other day, and I think he picked up whatever they had. He hangs about there too much. He is resting in bed, but I think a bit of sleep and a lot of willow bark tea will help him. The healer is seeing to him, and she is very good at what she does. She has been treating the family for years."

"Can I go and see him, Milady?" she asked. "I just want to see if he needs anything."

"I think it is better if he is not disturbed," Lady Findlay replied. "All he wants to do is sleep at the moment. I have never seen him so sick before, but Mistress Gibson tells me it is nothing serious, and I must not worry about it."

She sighed, then looked at Edina anxiously, and she saw with dismay that there were tears in Lady Findlay's eyes. "However, I am a mother, and worrying about my children is my job."

Now Edina felt even more guilty than before. He might have caught some sickness, but hauling him up to the turrets against his will had not done him any good at all, and had likely aggravated it.

She went through the rest of the day in the usual manner, seeing to the schoolchildren, writing letters to her friends and cousins in Inverness and chatting to the seamstresses who worked in a big room beside the kitchen. However, Aidan was at the back of her mind all the time, and many of the women she met commented on how distracted she looked.

When she almost cut herself on a pair of sewing shears, one of the seamstresses caught her hand before she leaned on the sharp instrument lying on the table.

"Mistress," she said, frowning. "Be careful! These things are mighty sharp an' can hurt ye very bad!"

"Thank you, Flora," Edina let out a huge sigh of relief and passed her hand across her forehead. "I do not know what is the matter with me today!"

Flora, a plump woman in her middle years, smiled at Edina. "Dinnae worry, Mistress, we a' have days like that!" she said.

Edina blushed hotly, feeling utterly foolish. She laughed self-consciously, then said quietly, "It is a woman's thing."

This was a lie, but Edina knew that all the women would believe her.

"Oh," Flora nodded knowingly. "I see. I know just how ye feel, Mistress."

Somehow, Edina managed to get through dinner, even though she could think of nothing else but Aidan. She was still trying to process the fact that his name was actually Aidan and not Lewis, and was terrified that she would slip and give herself away.

"Do you know if Lewis is feeling any better?" she asked of no one in particular.

"He is a strong man," the Laird answered, looking very unconcerned. "I doubt if a little chill will do him much harm. I can assure you, Edina, since you have been away, he has been through much worse than this. He has had chicken pox, measles and mumps, and is still alive to tell the tale. Do not worry so much."

Edina nodded, but caught an expression of extreme sadness on Lady Findlay's face that seemed quite out of all proportion to the situation. However, it passed as quickly as it had come, then Edina smiled at Laird Findlay and forced herself to finish her meal. She had an extra glass of wine with her food, hoping that no one would notice, and fortunately, no one did. When it came to drinking, she was very abstemious and she had never been more than a little tipsy in her entire life.

After her wine, she yawned, politely covering her mouth with her hand.

"I think I will go to bed early," she announced. "It has been a really busy day, and I am very weary."

"Yes, you look tired," her mother remarked, frowning. "Please make sure all these matters you are attending to are not too much for you, Edina."

"Just because I am a wee bit tired does not mean I am going to collapse with exhaustion, mother!" Edina laughed softly and patted her mother's hand. "I am fine. Truly."

"All the same, you are right, Edina," her father agreed. "My own mother always used to tell me to listen to my body. She said it was always right and would never give me any bad advice. Have an early night."

He stood up and smiled at her, then at Laird and Lady Findlay.

"Do we not have a beautiful daughter, Lady Eleanor, Laird Davie?"

The Laird and Lady Findlay both smiled warmly. "Indeed you do, Roy."

"You are making me blush!" Edina said, waving away their compliments. "Goodnight, everyone."

She kissed her father and mother and left.

After the door had closed behind her, Eleanor Findlay smiled at Bettina.

"And it is time she was married!"

"I doubt she would agree with you." Bettina laughed. "Edina is a free spirit, and the thought of being tied to a man does not appeal to her one bit at the moment."

"She always was!" Eleanor agreed. "But she cannot stay a spinster forever, Bettie. She will have to marry at some point. You want grandchildren, surely?"

"We do," Roy told her. "But we will not force Edina into marriage, Milady."

"Well, there are many eligible young men around," Lady Findlay went on. "Not sons of Lairds and Barons, of course, but squires, stewards, and gentleman farmers. She will be spoiled for choice, and I am sure she will have plenty of offers. Not only is Edina beautiful, but she is clever, and it is a myth that men don't like intelligent women."

Bettina laughed, but she had picked up the subtle warning in Eleanor's words. Lewis was not for Edina .

"Are there any more ceilidhs coming up?" she asked. "Perhaps we should start thinking about more new dresses, Eleanor!"

Lady Findlay clapped her hands.

"Laird Kennedy is having a sixtieth birthday celebration next month!" she cried gleefully. "We can alert the seamstresses tomorrow. Oh, and Edina, too!"

Edina went to her bedroom immediately after dinner, and climbed into bed at once. Her eyelids were drooping, and even though her mind was still full of Aidan, she simply could not stay awake, and she fell asleep almost instantly.

A few hours later, she woke up abruptly. She had been dreaming about Aidan, of course. They had been entwined in a passionate kiss, but the bedroom door had opened abruptly, and their parents had walked in. That was when she opened her eyes, terrified, her heart pounding, before she realised that the kiss had been no more than a fantasy, and she breathed a deep sigh of both relief and disappointment.

The moon was almost full that night, and when she woke up, there was a sliver of light coming through the gap in her curtains, drawing a silver line across the floor. The fire had gone out, and her chamber was cold, but she rose from bed anyway, then wrapped her robe and a blanket around herself before putting on a thick pair of slippers.

Edina looked outside. The sky was clear that night, but when there were no clouds it was always colder, and after a moment's thought she went to fetch a second blanket and wrapped it over the first. She opened and closed the door as quietly as she could, then padded along the corridor to what had been Lewis's room since they were kids, glad of her warm footwear as she remembered her freezing feet the day he had carried her upstairs.

Edina had never been carried in a man's arms before and thought it's one of the most pleasurable experiences of her life. She did not realise that she was smiling from ear to ear at the memory until she arrived at the door, then her expression changed to one of apprehension as she reached for the handle. Would the door be open?

Fortunately, it was, no doubt, to allow the healer to come and go. Edina closed the door quietly and turned down the lantern she was carrying in order not to wake Aidan as she moved across the room to the bed. She looked down at him for several minutes, unable to tear her gaze away from him.

Aidan was an untidy sleeper. He lay on his back, his limbs spread all over the bed. The blankets and sheets were tangled all over and around him, evidence of the fact that he was extremely restless.

Edina smiled as she looked at him; this was what she should have expected, she thought. She could never imagine Aidan laying his head on the pillow and sinking into slumber at once, then lying practically motionless all night.

She could hear that his breathing was hoarse and rasping, and he coughed now and again, but he did not seem to be in too much discomfort. Edina breathed a sigh of relief, having reassured herself that all was well.

She loved being there with him, her only regret being that she could not climb into the bed alongside him and hold him until he was better.

By the faint light of the lantern she could see that he had not been shaved for two days and stubble glinted on his face. How she longed to run her hands along its rough surface, since it always raised goose pimples and caused a delightful tingling on her flesh when she did so.

However, Edina knew she would wake him up if she touched him, so instead she sat on the chair beside his bed. Eventually, she fell asleep with her head pillowed on her arms on the rumpled blankets. Later, she would reflect that she had never had such a good, sound sleep in her life, but she woke to the sound of the household stirring. Then she crept back to her room, but not before planting a soft kiss on Aidan's lips.

Aidan was summoned to his father's study to meet with the tenant farmers that morning, and was surprised to find that he felt much better than he had the night before. His coughing had stopped, for one thing, and the pain and huskiness in his throat was gone. What had caused this seemingly miraculous improvement, he wondered?

He had no time to think about it any longer, however, since the men were gathering in the Great Hall. The Laird looked him up and down and smiled.

"You seem to be much better this morning, Son."

"I feel better," he answered. "Perhaps it's because I had such a good night's sleep."

The Laird nodded, and the meeting began. Once more, however, Aidan was finding it hard to concentrate. He had been dreaming that Edina was by his side during the night. In fact, he had even been able to smell her, and at one point he even thought he was touching her hair.

When the meeting was finished, his father took him to his study, bade him sit down, then sat behind his desk and stared at him for a long moment.

Eventually, he said, "What is wrong with you?"

Aidan was mystified.

"What do you mean?" he asked. "There is absolutely nothing wrong with me apart from a little cold, Father."

"That is not what I mean, and you know it!" the Laird growled. "You know that you should be starting to court suitable, eligible young ladies, but what are you doing? Riding with the guards, hunting, and worse still, you have been seen with Edina McCarthy. Hell, you were seen carrying her upstairs the other evening. What was that all about?

Every time you are seen with her, the news is all over the castle in seconds. You know that servants' gossip spreads like wildfire. Did you not listen when I warned you about this last time? If you do not choose a suitable young lady, then I will choose one for you! You are the Findlay heir, act like it!"

Aidan jumped to his feet. If there had been a time when he had been angrier, he could not remember it. He leaned across the desk so that his face was inches from the Laird's, and his voice throbbed with menace.

"You can choose whoever you like, Father, but you cannot force me to marry her. My bride will be my choice." He thumbed himself in the chest to emphasise his point. "So unless you want to be thoroughly and completely humiliated in front of the family of the lady you pick for me when I refuse her, I think you should leave this to me. I've done everything you have asked of me, so let this one pass, Father."

Father and son glared at each other for another few moments before Aidan turned on his heel and left, slamming the door behind him.

Aidan strode across the courtyard, then took the first set of stairs which led to the bedchambers upstairs. He went to his own room first, then threw himself on his bed. His mind was still full of Edina, and he could think of no way of banishing her image, unless it was to confront her openly about how he felt. That way she could reject him outright, and he could put all his foolish thoughts about her out of his head.

Having decided what to do, Lewis marched determinedly out of his bedroom and along the passage to Edina's. He had no idea whether she was in or not, since it was one of her school days, but he was determined to try. He hesitated outside the door for a moment, then thrust his chest out, squared his shoulders, and let out a long breath before knocking.

A moment later, the door opened and Edina stood looking at him, eyes wide with surprise.

"A–Lewis," she said faintly, looking if anyone heard her.

She stood aside to let him in, and an instant later he found himself wrapped in her arms as she hugged him tightly. He was somewhat surprised, but tightened his own arms around her, loving the feel of her soft, pliant body.

"I am so glad you're better," Edina said softly, smiling. "I was so worried about you that I did something I should not have done last night."

She looked slightly embarrassed, he thought.

"What did you do?" he asked, frowning.

"I came to see how you were," she replied, blushing, "but I ended up falling asleep myself. I woke up just before dawn in time to make my escape before anyone saw me. But I am so glad to see you looking well."

Because of you, he thought.

Somehow, Edina had had a beneficial effect on him which he could not explain—but no, that was fanciful, he said to himself. However, when he touched her hair he had thought it was a dream, but it had obviously not been, and he had not been dreaming about her scent either.

Something about Edina had done him good, and it was at that very moment that he realised she always would, that she was the woman he wanted by his side forever. In many ways, she was his opposite. She was outgoing and funny, driven by her ambitions, determined and confident, but she could be tender and sympathetic too, and he knew that she would be an excellent listener if ever he needed one.

A few seconds later, Edina found herself in the circle of Aidan's arms with his lips on hers as he bestowed a searing kiss on her. Edina pressed her body hard against his and plunged one hand into his thick hair, while she rested the other on his chest to feel his rapidly beating heart. She was sensitive to his body's reaction to her by the hard ridge pressed against her belly, and felt extremely proud that she could make him so aroused.

When they drew apart a few moments later, he looked down at her and his eyes were dark with desire.

"Edina," he whispered. "May I lock the door?"

Edina nodded but said nothing. She had no need to ask why.