Chapter 9

9

L ewis had felt restless after their encounter, and found it difficult to concentrate on the paperwork his father had given him. He kept his head down and forced himself to concentrate, however, and after a while he managed to lose himself in his work. So focussed was he, in fact, that he did not notice the time passing. It was only when he realised that it was almost dark, and he was having difficulty in seeingthat he lit a lantern and quickly finished off what he was doing.

He was ravenous, and briefly thought of sending for some food to be brought to him, but he knew that they would be dining on grouse tonight, and that was his favourite meat. His stomach rumbled at the thought of it. It would take at least a week before they could eat the stag, so that was not on the menu tonight.

He sighed, stretched and stood up. The fire in the study had gone out, and realising for the first time how chilled he felt, he left to head for his bedroom. However, he was careful to look around him, not wanting to bump into Edina again. She seemed to be omnipresent, magically appearing wherever he happened to be at any given moment, unsettling him and heating his desire to boiling point.

It was not to be, though. As he left the room, he was approached by the Captain of the Guard, who gave him a resigned look and shook his head.

"If ye are tryin' tae find the young Mistress Edina," he said, "she has gone tae your brother's room."

"Again?" Lewis growled, shaking his head. "I don't know what she hopes to find in there, Jamie."

Jamie shrugged. "She has been askin' in the kitchen about your brother," he told Lewis.

Lewis's heart skipped a beat, and for a few seconds he was mute with panic, not quite knowing what to say next, but Jamie solved the problem for him.

"She just wants tae be in the same place your brother was," the old man said, patting Lewis's shoulder. "Sometimes ye can still feel your loved ones in the place they loved the best. When my Cathy died, I used tae take out her favourite dress an' cuddle it. I used tae smell it because her scent was still there. Whenever I miss her too much, I can take it out an' feel that a part o' her is still with me."

Lewis saw that the old man's eyes had filled with tears as he remembered the wife he had lost to measles five years ago. She had borne him six children and had been the love of his life, and Lewis knew that he still grieved for her, in spite of the fact that he now had twenty-odd grandchildren. He hoped that such a love would come to him one day.

"I am sorry, Jamie," Lewis said regretfully. "I truly did not mean to make you sad."

Jamie wiped his eyes with the heels of his hands and shook his head.

"Ye didnae, Son," he told Lewis. "I miss my wife, but I have nothin' but happy memories o' her."

He gave Jamie a sudden, mischievous smile and winked.

"Somethin' tells me you will be makin' happy ones an' a' soon."

Lewis frowned. "What is that supposed to mean?"

"Well, ye are a young man," Jamie replied. "An' Edina is a lovely young lady. Somethin' tells me she is up tae somethin', an' it has something' tae dae wi' you!"

Lewis's heart skipped a beat. He could not afford to think of Edina this way, even though every one of his instincts told him otherwise.

"She likes to go there because she misses my brother," he told the old man. "She always liked him more than me. But now I have to go. Thank you, Jamie."

The old man was looking at him keenly, and seemed to be wondering about something, but he said nothing, merely patted Lewis on the shoulder again and walked away.

As Lewis watched him go, he wished that his own grandfather had been more like the Captain of the Guard instead of the cold, unbending creature he had been. He was always astounded that his father was the exact opposite. He resolved that when he was a father, he would imitate his own in every way; he was a very fortunate man.

He walked very slowly towards Aidan's room, thinking of what he would say to Edina when he met her. She would no doubt be looking around his stuff, he presumed, and the thought made his heart race. As the notion passed through his mind, he speeded up and was almost running by the time he reached the door.

When he opened it, he found Edina staring at the painted images, but she jumped, startled, as she heard the door opening. For a few seconds, she stood staring at him, then slowly turned to face him with a trembling smile on her face.

"When was this done?" she asked.

"Why are you so interested?" Lewis asked, frowning.

He was playing for time, and they both knew it. He wanted to get Edina out of the room as quickly as possible, so he had to keep her attention as he maneuvered her towards the door.

"I am curious," she answered, looking at the painting again. "It looks as though you were fourteen or fifteen. Who painted it?"

"A friend of my grandfather's," Lewis replied irritably. "Why do you want to know? Are you thinking of having your own portrait done? And why are you asking so many questions about me and my brother?"

As he spoke, he was moving towards her, and he stopped only a yard away from her. As usual, a potent current of attraction passed between them. Edina became acutely aware of the bed beside her, wondering how she would feel if Lewis suddenly took her in his arms and tumbled her onto it, then made passionate love to her.

She looked into his light-brown eyes, now golden in the candlelight, and saw that he looked troubled. Did he feel the same way she did? She put up her hands and cupped his face, loving the rasp of his day's growth of beard. Was there anything more sensual than the feel of a man's face, she wondered?

Lewis almost succumbed to the feel of Edina's gentle touch. He had felt his body respond to her as soon as he saw her, but now he was hard and almost helpless. Whoever had called women weak had been mistaken, because this woman was much stronger than he was. Yet at that moment, as he looked down into Edina's smoky violet eyes, he realised that she could have done, or made him do, anything her heart desired. She was dangerous.

With that thought, he snapped back to reality, and took a step backwards away from her. He swallowed, and passed his hand over his eyes.

"This room troubles you," Edina stated, without answering his question. "You were upset the last time you came here, and you are feeling the same way today. Do you miss your brother Aidan when you come in here?"

"Of course I do!" he snapped. "I miss him all the time. He was part of me. Do you not have a brother or sister you would give your life for?"

As soon as he said it, Lewis realised he had said the wrong thing, having been told about Edina's mother's history of lost babies. He felt wretched.

"Edina, I—" he began, but she held up her hand to stop him.

"My mother miscarried her babies and I have no siblings," she said softly. "There is nothing to be done about it. You made a mistake, Lewis, but I do not hold it against you."

She wondered if she should mention the news that the merchants had told her about the incoming ships, but decided against it. There was no point in raising his hopes only to have them dashed again.

Edina lowered her hands from Lewis's face, then she turned her eyes to the picture one last time. They left the room together, and as they walked towards the courtyard, Edina smiled.

"Do you remember the day we had the bet on who could climb the highest into the pine tree beside the loch?"

Lewis was silent for a moment before answering. In truth, it had been one of the most terrifying experiences of his life, and he shivered all over as he thought of it.

Edina had been the first one to reach the tree. Even though she was obliged to wear skirts, which she hated, she was the fastest of the three of them. The boys were bigger and stronger, but Edina had little fear, and would happily crash through undergrowth and through muddy puddles if it meant winning a game.

Now she stopped at their favourite tree, which was by far the tallest one beside Loch Dubh, and looked up into its branches, having to tilt her head back as far as it would go to see properly.

"I bet I can climb the highest," she said with a devilish smile.

"Do not be so silly," Lewis said sternly. "You will hurt yourself, Edina, and our parents will not be happy. You know who will get all the blame, do you not?"

"Not me!" Edina replied, giggling. "Nobody ever blames me."

Then, before anyone could stop her, she began to scramble up the rough bark of the tree, using the branches as footholds.

For a few seconds, the brothers stood on the ground before Aidan made a sudden leap upwards and began to scramble after Edina. He was nearly as fast as she was, and had begun to catch up to her when his foot snapped a branch, making him lurch sideways and almost fall. He managed to hang on with one hand, but he was frozen with terror and unable to move up or down. He was perhaps twenty feet off the ground, and it was obvious that if he fell he would injure himself severely—or worse.

They had, of course, played tree-climbing games many times before, as was evidenced by the time they had all fallen on top of each other in a heap, but they had never before ventured up so dangerously high.

Edina was above them and saw nothing of what had happened, so she went on climbing, completely unaware of what was going on. It was only when she heard Aidan's squeal of terror that she looked downwards, then for the first time she realised how high up she was, and her stomach lurched with fear. However, she had stronger nerves than Aidan, and she waited while Lewis scrambled up to help his brother to the ground before climbing down herself.

There she found Aidan clinging to his brother, weeping as though his heart would break, swearing to never follow her that high again. Lewis had his arms around him in a tight embrace and was making soft, soothing noises. When Aidan reached home he was literally sick with fear, and had to stay in bed for two full days to recover, and Lewis sat by his bedside for most of that time. Edina had felt dreadfully guilty, but three days after he recovered, she had left for Inverness, and that was the last time she had seen Aidan.

Even at the tender age of ten, Edina had been aware of Lewis's fierce and protective love for his brother, and as she looked at him now, she realised that nothing had changed. He had tried to avoid looking at the portrait, and Edina was sure that it was because he did not wish to make a fool of himself by breaking in front of her.

Men were strange, she thought. They were big, muscular, and strong on the outside, yet they were expected by society to keep their tenderest emotions hidden. Edina knew that if she scratched the surface, things would be utterly different because therein lay the seat of their pity, fear, protectiveness, and most of all, love. She knew this because she had seen it herself.

Abruptly, Lewis asked, "Why are you wearing your bathrobe?"

Edina looked down at herself, suddenly realising that she was naked but for the flimsy woollen robe. Granted, it covered her from head to foot, but her feet were bare, and she was standing on cold stone flagstones. She had not even realised she was shivering, so caught up was she in her interaction with Lewis.

"I—just got out of the bath," she replied, her teeth chattering.

"So you felt a pressing need to run to this desolated room, half naked?" he asked drily.

"I-I wanted to look at the picture," Edina replied lamely, her teeth chattering.

"And you could not wait until you were properly dressed?" Lewis shook his head as Edina turned away.

She began to run, holding her robe shut as she did so, but Lewis could see that she was having trouble.

"Wait!" he called.

Edina stopped, and before she could react, he swept her off her feet and into his arms.

She gave a little squeal of surprise, then relaxed, loving the feeling of being held against the hard warmth of his body and being jogged up and down as he moved. She could have stayed where she was forever, she thought.

"I can walk," she told him, laughing.

"I know, but I have walked barefoot on these floors myself," he replied, "and I know that by now your feet will be nearly numb. Whatever possessed you to come out half-naked like this?"

He looked down at her, frowning, but regretted it at once. Those eyes…those lips. He urgently tore his gaze away from her.

"I was in a hurry," she replied. "I wanted to be back in time to dress for dinner."

"Why did you not dress first?" Then he answered his own question. "Because you were always so impulsive, always scrambling up trees and pretending you wanted to jump off the turrets."

Edina giggled. "I might have done it one day if you two had not stopped me. The lowest one is only about ten feet off the ground."

"Still high enough to break your leg," he informed her as they began to climb the stairs.

Edina said nothing more until he set her down outside her chamber door.

"I wish we had those days back again," she whispered. "Don't you?"

"Sometimes."

His face looked rather sad, she thought.

"I should only take twenty minutes or so to dress," Edina told him. "Can you come and get me? There is something I want to show you."

Lewis looked at her suspiciously. "What?"

"You will see," Edina replied mischievously.

Lewis sighed and looked at her with narrowed eyes. Despite his better judgement, he knew he was going to do as Edina asked; when she was in this playful mood, she was impossible to resist. He pretended to be reluctant.

"I will come with you," he told her, "to keep you safe, although somehow I know I am going to regret it."

Then he watched as she closed the door behind her. His heart was hammering, and he was so preoccupied when he went to his room to dress for dinner that Mick asked him if he was quite well.

"Just tired, Mick," Lewis told him.

It was his excuse for everything these days.

When he had finished dressing, he went to Edina's chamber and waited outside for a moment. When the door opened, and she stepped outside, Edina had a mischievous smile on her face.

"What do you want to show me?" Lewis demanded.

Edina took his hand and led him to the staircase up to the first tier of the turrets, which was barely higher than the outside wall of the castle. They passed this one, and the second one, which was where Edina had found him in tears.

However, as they reached the bottom of the third tier, Lewis hesitated. This part of the keep was the highest part of the castle, and he had no head for heights. He tried to swallow his anger and his terror as he stared at Edina, mystified. She began to ascend the staircase, smiling at him, but he let go of her hand and took a step backwards.

"I know you do not come up here," Edina said, looking down at him. "But the view is spectacular."

"And almost invisible in the dark," he pointed out. "This is a waste of time, Edina. Come. I am hungry."

He turned his back on her and put one foot on the top step of the downward flight of stairs ready to descend, then froze as he heard Edina's voice.

"Aidan!"

Seeing his reaction, Edina ran further up the stairs and arrived at the top. He followed her as fast as he could, defying his terror. Her hair was tangling around her head with the force of the stiff breeze, and she was like a phantom. The parapet wall was about waist high, but she would be able to scramble onto it awkwardly if she wished to.

Lewis knew that Edina would do almost anything for a dare, and she had hurt herself a few times, not badly, but there was always a first time. The parapet was at least fifty yards high, and a fall from it would be fatal.