Chapter 11

CHAPTER ELEVEN

ASHER

“ Y ou can’t just walk out on her, bro, not now.”

I look at Jax as he follows me into the woods behind the house. Harper’s words, every detail echoes in my mind. Everything they did, what he did to her.

“Leave me alone, Jax. I told you I needed a minute.”

“Nope, no can do. She needs us—she needs you.”

I stop turning around.

“How Jax? How do I even look at her in her eyes and not see that? Not see everything she went through and know it’s my fault?”

“You do it because you have to.”

“She was raped repeatedly, and beaten and tortured, and she can’t even talk about the last two men she was sent to, so fuck knows how bad that was… How the fuck do I process that?”

“Asher, I love you, bro, but this isn’t about you. This is about how she is, and we have to help her through that because now she’s relived it, I think she’s going to need us more than ever.”

“She doesn’t need me,” I shout. “It’s my fucking fault it happened. Her being in my life is what caused it. She needs help because of me. The best thing I could do for her is to walk out of her life and never come back—all of your lives. You heard her. Deacon might just be too big for all of us.”

“So, you’ll what? Just quit?”

I look away because I never said that. I just wouldn’t involve them because even if it kills me, I’ll make sure the people who hurt her suffer a hell of a lot more than she did.

Jax nods. “No, what you’ll do is go on some sort of suicide mission to try and do this on your own. Fuck, you’re such a fucking idiot. Don’t you get it? This isn’t just about you anymore! They tried to take Brooke. They nearly killed Nate—they put Harper through something unimaginable. And you still think you’re the only one alone in this. I got sent to fucking juvie for you, man. I’d fucking go to prison for you if it meant I found all of them. Me and Chase would die for you.”

“That’s the fucking problem. You two. You fucking saved me, man. You save me every fucking day. You were the ones who were there for me when my own family couldn’t even acknowledge me, let alone help me when I needed it, and you think I would let you die for me.”

He takes a step forward.

“So, pay that forward because right now, there’s someone else that needs saving, and she needs you more than all of us. She’s a fighter like you, but there’s no way she can deal with all of that on her own. You need to stop punishing yourself because if you can’t, then maybe you’re right—maybe you can’t be what she needs.

“Right now, you can’t see past the guilt. The guilt of not being able to save your sister, Nate, Brooke, Harper. It’s not your fucking fault, Asher. All of it—it happened because of them, because of Deacon. The only one that needs punishing is them. You can leave, but that won’t stop the rest of us because the only way any of us can move past this is by ending it. So, if you leave, you’re leaving us to deal with them alone.

“It’s up to you, brother, but the only thing you should be thinking is how you’re gonna help that girl that loves you. Even still, even after all this, that girl fucking loves you. And for the life of me, I don’t know why cause you’re kinda a mopey douche.”

I crack a smile. That’s the thing with Jax—no matter how bad things get, no matter how lost we are, he’s the one that brings us back.

“Thank you.” I walk over to him, putting my arm around him.

“Well, someone’s gotta tell you how it is.”

“Yeah.”

“You gonna man up and check on your girl?”

“She’s not my girl, Jax.”

“Yeah, she is. You two just need to get through this and work your shit out.”