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23 Blossom Flowers and Old Friends

Blossom Flowers and Old Friends

Savannah,

I know many people wonder why I love cherry blossom trees so much. I always have. We were raised among them. Their colors, their fragility were just something I was fascinated by. Most children counted down until Christmas. I counted down the days until it was cherry blossom season.

As I sit here now, they have bloomed. The blossom grove is full of pink and white petals. It is alive, so alive. The sweet floral fragrance, the stunning beauty that has bloomed, takes my breath away each time I am taken there.

I can no longer walk. I use a wheelchair now. But I don't mind. As long as I get to see my blossom grove in all its beauty, one more time, I am content. Especially with my Rune by my side. We can sit for hours there. I am safe in his arms beneath those trees. Every breath I take is cherished. Every kiss Rune gives me is a gift I didn't think I would have again.

I have taken none of it for granted.

But this year's bloom is bittersweet, as I know it will be my last on this Earth. I know that soon, when the first petal falls, my breaths will become numbered. My heartbeats will be finite. I grow tired, Savannah. Even now, simply holding the pen and writing to you exhausts me. But I feel no fear. I want you to know that. Like the cherry blossom flower, I may have had a short life, but it has been vibrant and full, and so very sweet.

Sweetest when I am with the ones I love. The sweetest when I am with you and Ida. With my Rune.

God knew my life would be short, Savannah. That is why He gave me my love of cherry blossoms. So that I would understand what it was to live a limited but full life. I was born in Blossom Grove to live among the trees my life was so inspired by. I believe that. Nothing is permanent in this life, Savannah. So, embrace its beauty while you can.

When you read this, know that I am in heaven, safe among cherry blossoms that no longer die. And I will be so happy to sit beneath them, thinking of my family, thriving in their lives until they return to me and, like the heavenly cherry blossom trees I wait beneath, stay forever by my side.

Until that day,

Poppy

Savannah

Kyoto, Japan

It was too much to absorb. Everywhere I turned was a blanket of pink and white. Trees lining every pathway, parks full to the brim of blossom trees. The floral scent was infusing every fraction of air, and all I saw, wherever I turned, was Poppy. I was happy that I was seeing Kyoto now, at the end of the journey. Because if I had seen this months ago, when this trip had only just begun, I wouldn't have been able to stand it.

Now, I could gaze at these trees, full of temporary life, and admire them with the respect that they deserved. And I could see Poppy at every turn and not be felled by it. But be strengthened . I smiled, though my chest rose up and down with soft cries as tears dropped from my eyes. They fell to the ground, leaving a piece of me forever in this place—a sister's tribute. Cael held my left hand, just drinking in this wondrous sight with me. I held out my right hand, the breeze weaving between my fingers. And, in my mind's eye, I saw Poppy beside me, holding me tight. She would be gazing upon the trees she loved so much with nothing but love and gratitude in her heart.

"Incredible," Dylan whispered behind us. I opened my eyes and saw birds circling up ahead as if they were breath taken by the sight too. "Is it like the blossom grove, Sav?" Dylan asked. I'd told him all about it.

I thought of home and felt the sharp pang of homesickness. As magnificent as this sight was, nothing could take the place of our small blossom grove. Especially now that my sister rested there. It was a magical place, serene and blessed.

I opened my mouth to reply when a voice beside Dylan said, "Nothing could ever replace our blossom grove."

Shock rendered me immobile for a few seconds. Because I knew that voice. Had missed that voice. I released Cael's hand and stepped around Dylan. And there was Rune Kristiansen in the flesh, beside us in this stunning Kyoto park.

"Rune …" I said, and fresh tears sprung to my eyes. I ran to him and wrapped my arms tightly around him. Rune held me close, and I felt his long, blond hair on my cheeks as he did. This was all so surreal. Being here, among so many blossom trees, now with Poppy's Rune at my side.

I pulled back and wiped my eyes. Rune was dressed as he always was—black jeans, black shirt, and biker boots. He hadn't changed a bit, except now he was a little older. And just like the Rune of old, he had a camera in his hand.

"Surprise," he said, and I shook my head, unable to speak.

He smiled. "I have been in South Korea with my mentor for a few weeks on shoots. We had a couple of days free between projects. He was meeting with some old colleagues, so I decided to hop on a plane and take a quick detour here. I'm only here for a day and night. But your mama told me you'd be here too. I contacted your group's leaders, and they told me where you'd be. I wanted to surprise you."

"You're here," I whispered, still in shock.

Rune's eyes softened and a hint of sadness flickered in their depths for a few seconds. "I never miss the cherry blossoms, Sav." He touched his camera. "I still have to show my girl."

The pictures on Poppy's grave.

Every year at the end of the cherry blossom season, near the anniversary of her death, a new picture of a cherry blossom festival somewhere in the world appeared at Poppy's headstone.

Rune and I shared a long, knowing look, and emotion clogged my throat so tightly that I couldn't speak. Rune dipped his head, and I saw him subtly wipe his eyes. When he faced me again, I saw how much he missed my sister written on his handsome face.

"Peaches?" Cael came behind me and placed his arm around my shoulder, turning me to face him. "Are you okay?" He looked to Rune, confusion in his eyes. Rune's head tipped to the side at how close Cael was to me. Heat filled my cheeks. Clearly, my family hadn't told him about Cael. Rune raised a knowing eyebrow. It broke the heaviness of the moment.

"Cael," I said and gestured to Rune. "This is Rune, Poppy's …" I trailed off, not knowing what to say anymore.

My stomach turned, until Rune said, "I'm Poppy's Rune."

Poppy's Rune … Because he had always been more than a boyfriend to my sister. He was her entire life, the beat of her heart and her soulmate. They were just separated for a little while.

Cael took his arm from around me, and his face lit with recognition. "Cael," he said and shook Rune's hand. Rune smiled and then looked at me the way any big brother would. Like I had some explaining to do.

"Rune?" Dylan said. I turned to my friend, who was looking at Rune in earnest.

" Hei ," Rune said to Dylan, shaking his hand, his Norwegian language sneaking through. I would remember to ask Rune to talk to Dylan at some point before he left. I believed he could help Dylan too.

"Dylan," he said, "Savannah's friend. I'm on the trip with her." Dylan gestured to everyone else as they approached us with interest. Understanding flashed in Rune's blue eyes. One by one he met all my friends. Cael placed his hand on my back, a silent support. Rune gave us all a small smile. He knew exactly where we all were emotionally. He had walked— was walking —this path too.

"I can't believe you're here," I said, finding my voice again.

Rune tipped his head in the direction of the park. "Do you have time to catch up?"

I looked to Mia and Leo, who were behind us. They'd clearly already met Rune, helped him plan this. Mia shooed us away with her hand. I turned to Cael. I'd wanted to see these cherry blossoms with him too. He must have seen that battle written on my face, because he pressed his forehead to mine and said, "I'll go with the group. You take all the time you need with Rune. I'll be waiting for you when you get back." Cael kissed me. It was soft and tender, and shivers ran down my spine.

"See you soon," I whispered, then went to Rune, who had moved aside to give us privacy.

Rune began walking. He put his arm around me and hugged me to his side. "I've missed you, Sav." He released me and really studied me. "You look better." He took a long, relieved breath. "You seem stronger."

"I am," I said and meant every word. "I'm getting better. I'm stronger." I lifted my hand and ran my fingers gently over a vibrant pink blossom bud, just about to bloom. "This trip …" I shook my head. "I don't even know where to begin."

We came to a patch of grass covered in low tables for picnics. Rune gestured for us to sit down. This section of the park was covered by a low canopy of cherry blossom branches—it had made a ceiling of petals. I smiled up at the thick layer of flowers, so many it blocked out most of the springtime sun.

"I'd say we start with the boy who just kissed you," Rune said, humor lacing his voice.

My cheeks blazed with fire. But I was proud of Cael. I was proud he was mine. "You now know his name is Cael," I said, hearing how much I'd fallen for him just by my voice. Rune nudged my arm. I laughed at his playfulness but then sobered up quickly. "He lost his older brother." All humor left Rune too. "Cillian … his brother … he took his own life."

"No," Rune whispered, no doubt picturing Alton in his head.

"Cael saw it happen. Held him afterward." I inhaled deeply to stave off the pain it brought picturing Cael like that. "It's been … he's finding everything really hard."

"Of course he is," Rune said, completely supportive. It was one of the reasons Poppy loved him, I was sure. "Has this trip helped him?" Rune asked.

"It has," I said, but I had to admit the truth to myself. "But he's still in pain. The therapies we've done have brought up things that he is still grappling with."

Rune nodded, then looked up at the flowers. He closed his eyes, and the breeze danced through his hair. I liked to think it was Poppy running her hand through his long strands as she sat beside him. By the smile it pulled on Rune's mouth, he maybe thought that too.

He opened his eyes and said, "When I lost your sister …" He shook his head. "Those early days after she had gone. I didn't know how to breathe , Savannah." Rune's voice broke. Tears sprang to my eyes too. Because I had been exactly the same way. "Then the more time passed, the worse it got. Because I felt her absence. The gap between the last time I kissed her and that present moment felt like such a long time. Too long for me to cope."

Rune lifted his camera, and seeing something I didn't, he snapped a picture. When he lowered it, he said, "Those final months with your sister … with Poppymin , were everything to me." His voice was rasped and raw. I knew those months were special. I'd seen it. Seen my sister and the happiness Rune had brought back to her life for her final days. As much as she'd loved her family, only Rune could have made her passing as beautiful as it was. He had made it perfect for her. And he had come back into her life just when she'd needed him most.

Just like Cael had entered mine.

Rune put his hand on mine and squeezed. "Do you love him?"

There was no doubt in my heart when I said, "Yes. More than I ever thought possible."

Rune smiled. Smiled so big I knew it was on behalf of Poppy too. "Then you've met him," he said. "The boy you'll spend the rest of your life with."

I nudged him and said, "My Rune."

Rune choked on his laugh, and a tear spilled over the crease in his eye. "Your Rune," he echoed.

"He's a hockey player from just outside of Boston," I said.

"Boston, hey?" he said, clearly referring to my future at Harvard.

"He was meant to go to Harvard last fall. On a hockey scholarship. But he walked away from both that and the sport when his brother passed. His brother was a hockey player too, and it became too hard for Cael to keep playing … the memories … they were too difficult."

"Give him time," Rune said. "He's walked a hard path. But he might find his way back there." He turned to me. "Serendipitous, though," he said. "That Cael should've been going to Harvard too …" That's exactly what I had thought. Rune pointed up at the sky. "I'd say this has your sister's mark written all over it."

I laughed. "She did love love."

"She did love love," Rune repeated wistfully. "God, Sav. I miss her so much. Being in these places makes me feel like I miss her more but also that she's right here, beside me, too."

"I know what you mean," I said. Then I asked him what I knew I should have asked him a long time ago. "Are you okay, Rune? Really okay?" I saw in his face that he knew I wasn't asking about in general. I was asking about how he was without Poppy.

"I am," he said, and some tight pull in my chest settled. "Because there's no way I won't see your sister again someday. I know I'll be with my girl once more. I'll get to kiss her again and hold her close. I'll get to hear her laugh and hear her play the cello. I'll get to sleep beside her and just be with her. Like we always should have been. And all the years we have had to spend apart will fade to dust."

I ducked my head so he wouldn't see me break. It clearly didn't work, because he said, "For now, I see her in my dreams, Sav. I talk to her every day, and I know she hears me. I see her perfect dimpled smile. And in my soul, she reassures me she's happy and pain-free. I talk about her any chance I get. It keeps her alive to me." His voice grew hoarse, thickened with emotion. "There'll never be anyone else for me. Even from heaven, Poppy gives me more love than I could ever need." He lifted his camera. "I travel the world and take pictures for her . In her honor. She gives me purpose, every day. And that helps me keep going. Helps me stay away from the darkness of grief." His lip pulled up fondly at the side. "Poppy taught me that. How to cherish and love life. Even with her gone. I owe it to her to live for us both. I promised her. And would never break my promise to my girl."

"Purpose … like studying medicine will be for me," I said, thinking of Tala, of all the kids back in the Philippines, especially those who couldn't be saved.

"Like you studying medicine," he said in agreement. "We honor Poppy by keeping going, in her name. That will be enough for me until I see her again."

He was quiet for a few minutes, our conversation floating above us. "I don't regret a single moment of my life with your sister, Sav," he said. "Even the bad times. The very worst times. When she was down, in the trenches, I was there with her. She knew that. That's what made us so strong. Thrive or fail, I was beside her, holding her hand. Nothing would make me leave her … not even death."

I pictured Cael and knew that was us too. I would be with him through rain or sunshine, when he was dancing in the light or lost in the dark. I just prayed he knew he had me, one hundred percent. I knew he thought himself a burden to me. But he was far from it. He elevated me. Made me soar. I knew he hated when he broke, when he was down and sinking into darkness. But what Cael did not get was that vulnerability only made me love him more. I'd come to understand that we showed our worst to those we love best. There was no judgment. Only complete, unwavering support.

I clutched on to Rune's arm. "I'm real glad you're here," I said and laid my cheek on his bicep. "A piece of home with me halfway across the world." I smiled as the cherry blossoms swayed in the breeze again. "A piece of Poppy."

Rune kissed my hair and we sat in silence, just watching the trees my sister loved so much. Remembering her. Honoring her. Thinking of her.

Loving her.

Forever Always.

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