14. What I Need

"Hi," Sage said when she opened her door at four. "I can't wait for tonight."

"Me neither," he said. They were catching a show at the casino. Going to dinner first, then the show and what they did after would be up to her, he'd told her.

"You look sexy," she said with a big grin on her face.

He had dark jeans on and a light red button-down shirt. She wouldn't call it pink, but it wasn't deep dark red. It had faint silver stripes on it.

On his feet was a pair of brown leather sneaker-type shoes.

It was the most she'd seen him dressed up and it fit him.

He didn't come across as a fashionable suit-and-tie person and she found she wasn't into that.

She'd spent way too many years of her life dating men like that and look at how well that turned out.

"Sexy?" he asked, looking down at himself. "I'd think that was more a description of you."

"Do you think?" she asked, doing a little spin for him with her arms in the air.

She had on brown dress pants that were straight to the floor, a little wide on the bottom so that only the tips of her burgundy pumps were showing. Her shirt was silky in appearance with a big bold blocky pattern of fall jewel-toned colors.

Her hair was pulled back on one side and held in place by one of Rose's metal clips. In the past year, they'd added metal hair accessories to the line and she enjoyed wearing them more than the fabric ones from Poppy's line.

Her shirt had cuffs at her wrist and allowed her to have two thicker bangle bracelets, each with a different flower on them to match some of the colors in her shirt.

"I do," he said. "Let me see those shoes."

She laughed and lifted her pant leg up to show the burgundy pointy toe pumps. "I need the height with these pants so they aren't dragging on the ground. I figured we wouldn't be on our feet that much."

"No reason to be," he said. "Why don't we go get dinner? That will give us plenty of time to get to the show early and find our seats and get a drink."

"Sounds like a great plan," she said. She picked up her brown leather purse—one of Poppy's that had a big poppy flower stamped into the strip of leather—then put the bag on her shoulder. She had her "pimp the product" going tonight.

Sage had never expected how much fun it would be to do this and everything she had at her disposal.

She hadn't been around long enough to get a ton of free products like a lot of the other staff, but with her discount, she'd treated herself to one piece a month. Not to mention Violet had been sending her gifts from Blossoms for a few years too.

The bracelets were actually over a year old and some of her favorite pieces.

Knox held his hand out for her to lock her door. "Are you coming back here and maybe spending the night again?" she asked.

They hadn't talked about it.

"I'd like that but didn't want to assume."

"Do you have a change of clothes for tomorrow?" she asked.

"In my truck."

"Then go get it and bring it up if you want. No reason to leave it out there."

He smiled and then nodded his head and she stepped back into her place while he ran down to do that.

Knox came back up five minutes later. "Where do you want me to put it?"

"You can leave the bag in the living room for now. We'll put your stuff away later."

"Easy enough," he said.

They left after that and got in his truck. It was only twenty minutes to the casino and they had dinner reservations at four thirty close by. That would give them plenty enough time to eat and get to the show with no reason to rush.

Knox didn't say much in the truck. Normally he was more talkative.

"Everything okay?" she asked.

He turned and looked at her. "Sure."

"You don't sound convincing," she said.

He was back to looking at the road as he drove. "It's fine."

Which meant it wasn't. "Tell me about what is fine," she said. "Really. You've got something on your mind. Does it have to do with me?"

"No," he said. "Nothing with you or me."

"Okay," she said. "Guess you don't want to talk about it."

She wouldn't push him. She just wanted to make sure it didn't have anything to do with them or their relationship.

"It's not that," he said. "It's more like drama. No need to bore you."

"Oh," she said. "Bore me. We all have drama in our lives. That is how you get to know each other more."

He laughed, but it was a forced sound.

"Don't say you didn't ask for it."

"I'll be asking for it later," she said, letting out a giggle.

This time he laughed and it was an honest sound.

"You're exactly what I need right now."

"That might be the nicest thing said to me in a long time."

He turned to look at her and the cloud that was floating over him seemed to shift some.

"Good," he said. "You know my history with my mother."

"I do," she said. "You don't talk much or have a good relationship."

He'd told her some of why. That his mother tried to turn him against his father, but it didn't work in the end.

"I don't," he said. "She called me today. She never calls. We text a few times a year. Holidays mostly. I answered because I thought something might be wrong."

"I would have done the same thing," she said. "You just never know."

"She was playing me again."

"How so?" she asked.

He seemed to hesitate and then said, "She told me that Blaze needed help with tuition this semester."

"Your half brother?" she asked. "You help with his college?"

"No," he said. "I don't. I said that is her job and Zach's. That is Blaze's father. By the way, Blaze and Zach have a good relationship. And Zach has always helped Blaze. Or at least my mother said she is annoyed because she knows Zach gives Blaze money."

"It's his son. There isn't anything wrong with that."

"There isn't," he said. "But my mother did the same thing when I turned eighteen. Her child support ended at that age. My father paid for my schooling. Whatever it was going to be, he'd pay for it."

"That's great," she said. "My parents helped, but it's not like they could afford to cover it all. I've got some loans, but they are almost paid for. It's been hard living on Staten Island."

The cost of living was high there and she hadn't been making a ton to do much more than pay a little extra on her loans. It was that or forfeit a savings. She found a happy medium and living here she was able to chip away a lot more.

"Blaze is smart. Smarter than I realized because it's not something we ever talked about. He gets a lot of aid and scholarships, but room and board aren't covered. He has some loans. After I got into it with my mother on a number of things we don't need to talk about, I felt guilty and sent a text to Blaze to see if there was an issue. I mean, I don't want him dropping out of anything. He only has this year and next at this point."

"That was nice of you," she said. She wasn't surprised either.

"He texted me back an hour later and I called him. It's five thousand. Not a ton. His loan is being processed now, but it was held up. He never even said a word to our mother about it. He doesn't know how she found out other than she must have checked on the parent portal. My guess is she does that to see if large amounts are put in there from Zach."

"Which is none of her business if Zach does that."

"My mother just feels slighted by anything she didn't end up with even if she is the one that ruined all the relationships she's been in."

"Oh," she said. "Can I ask why she is always to blame?"

"Cheating. Always cheating and with cheating comes lying. Two things I detest. When someone is in a relationship you don't go find another person. Half the time my mother was sleeping with guys who were married or in relationships too. She didn't care other than she wanted the attention and someone to take care of her."

Sage nodded. It was all she could do. And all the more reason why she'd had to keep what she told him about her relationship with Henry to a minimum.

She was the idiot and had no one to blame but herself for what happened, but it was in her past.And though she agreed with Knox's opinion on cheaters, it was still not something she wanted to put to the test.

No, she wasn't going to blame herself for everything. Just that she had her eyes closed when she shouldn't have. Maybe she should have questioned things more, but most of it made sense at the time.

"So because money from Zach ended a few years ago, she is mad if her son gets something from his father now? That sounds pretty selfish to me."

"That's my mother," he said. "She's always felt that way. My guess is my mother thought maybe she could get me to give her the money for Blaze."

"If Blaze didn't tell her then he wouldn't have needed it," she said. "Does that mean she would have kept the money?"

"No clue," he said. "I'm not that stupid. If I had agreed, I would have paid it directly. Not even given it to Blaze. Not that I think he'd go blow it, but I don't know him well enough to know if he had any hidden things going on. People always have secrets."

Nothing she could say to that either. "Good point."

"Blaze said he didn't need the money. He was good. We joked about our mother a bit and how she is. I don't know if he had it as badly as I did."

"Because he had a relationship with his father and you didn't? Are you a little jealous over that? Not to be mean, but just talking."

"It's not mean. I am jealous. Blaze is really friendly and outgoing. Zach was decent enough, but I was so upset over the move and everything going on in my life back then. Zach knew my mother was married and he still had an affair with her. He said he loved her. He wanted to marry her, but my mother didn't want to get married again."

"Sounds like a lot of men got hurt by your mother," she said.

"More than I can count I'm sure. But again, Zach knew she was married so he's not blameless."

"Did their affair continue while your mother was pregnant?" she asked. "I mean, that whole thing sounds off."

"Don't even get me going on that," he said. "I think Zach truly believed the child was his. He was right. So when it came down to it, he wasn't leaving her because he wanted to know and wait until the baby was born. If Blaze was my father's son, I think Zach would have left. But that didn't happen."

"I guess that makes more sense. Your mother obviously didn't know who the father was?"

"No," he said. "At least she said she didn't. I've heard things over the years. I guess she was on the pill, so it's not like one guy was protected and not the other. My mother is so selfish that I think she was going to make her game plan once the baby was born. Love wasn't going to dictate anything. But the red hair was a dead giveaway and my father took any decision she wanted to make right out of her hands."

"Good for him," she said.

"But I paid the price."

"Sounds like you and Blaze both did and I'm sorry for that."

"Don't be sorry," he said. "Nothing can change that. Anyway, I told Blaze to let me know if he needs anything. To reach out directly. He never will and he even said that. Not only does he wait tables on the weekends but he also tutors. He's always been a worker. He doesn't ask for much and if he does, it's only of his father."

"Sounds like he's got a good head on his shoulders."

"He does. Probably better than me."

"I wouldn't say that," she said, her hand reaching over and patting his leg. "Looks to me like you turned out just fine."

"Amazing, isn't it? All things considered."

"Don't do that to yourself," she said. "Even when I knew you back in school, I didn't think you'd be the type to get down on yourself like this."

"I hid it well," he said, smirking at her.

"No more hiding it," she said. "Or thinking it. I mean it."

"I'll try not to," he said.

"Good," she said. They pulled into the restaurant. "I'm starving. For more than food, but the rest can wait. I had a great time with the girls last night, but all I could think of was spending time with you tonight. Hope you don't think I'm clingy saying that."

"Not at all," he said, smiling. A bright one that told her their night was going to be a great one.