Chapter 29

Drew

“Yo, McCallister,” my new teammate Dylan calls. In the middle of strapping my hand for training, I keep my focus on my palm instead of him. The guy is in my offensive line but smaller than me, which is only the first of my problems with this team.

We’ll win, though.

I need to if I have any hopes of making an impact on the draft this year.

Once everything is taped in place, I look up to Dylan, who’s pointing his thumb over his shoulder with a dumbstruck look on his face.

“There’s some hot chick outside asking for you.”

I sigh and reach for my shirt. Here we go again. This isn’t the first time a girl has tried to speak to me before practice, and I know it won’t be the last. Whether I’m in the library, trying to keep my grades up or eating my dinner in the cafeteria, cleat chasers are all over me. I’m fresh meat at this college. A new player that they haven’t managed to get their hands on, and I swear there’s a competition going over who can get my attention first.

Unfortunately, none of them realize what a lost cause I am. After being burned by Bella, I promised myself that I would stay away from girls until I get drafted. If I get drafted. And that’s looking like a bigger and bigger if every time I train.

“Thanks, man.” I high-five him as I walk to the front doors, rehearsing the gentle speech I use when turning these girls down. Thanks so much for your interest. Unfortunately, there’s a girl back home. We like to keep things private. I can introduce you to my friend if you want. Always the same lines because it kills the conversation instantly. I could ignore the fact that there’s a girl out there, but then I run the risk of having to deal with her after practice.

My feet slow when I see the obnoxiously patterned kilt and long, white socks covering thickly toned thighs. Only one girl I know can get away with an outfit like that and look hot.

“Bella?” I breathe out, my eyes taking in her familiar shoes, tracking up to her French braid.

I must be dreaming, or someone gave me a hallucinogenic drug, so I’d fail my test tomorrow because there’s no other reason she’d be here. Wouldn’t be the first time I’ve imagined her. She haunts my dreams regularly.

She turns, making the skirt flip in its wake, and flashes me a small, unconfident smile. She looks hot as hell in her white sweater and tight shirt underneath, and I bite my cheek to stop myself from showing any reaction.

She drinks me in before her eyes connect with mine. “Hey, Drew,” She swallows, edging ever-so-slightly closer to me. “Long time no see.”

“What are you doing here?” Speaking to my hallucination is a first, but since Dylan saw her, and I can smell her perfume, I’m guessing that maybe it’s not a dream.

“I, uh, needed to speak to you.” Her voice is hesitant, and she hikes her bag farther up her shoulder. Speak to me? After four months?

“What about?” I still haven’t moved from my spot, and I can feel the automatic door aggressively attempting to shut, only to have my bulky body blocking it.

She takes a step back, so I take one forward, the door releasing with the movement.

“Would you believe me if I said I left my hairbrush in your room?” She blushes, her collarbone flushing, and she laughs awkwardly when I don’t respond. “Why would you want to talk to me, right? I ruined your life. Here you are, stuck in California because of me, and you made it clear that you needed to move on without me, but I’m kind of moving, and I wanted to talk to you about what happened between us before I left.”

“How did you find me?” I changed my number when I changed schools, thinking it would be better to start fresh. The only person who got my new number was Jacob, and I know he didn’t share it with Bella.

It wasn’t that I wanted to get rid of her; it was that I knew if I didn’t take affirmative action, we’d be stuck doing the same thing over and over again.

“Do you really think you’d be that hard to find? All I had to do was get to Southern Collegiate and then ask where the gym was,” she smirks, holding back an even snarkier response. God, did I miss her attitude.

“So, you came all the way from Indiana to tell me that you’re my ultimate stalker?”

“No. I came because there are things we need to talk about. Do you have any time to meet tonight?” This time when she takes a few steps forward, I don’t back away. The pull of our bodies is just too great to ignore.

“I’ve got practice for the next couple of hours, but I can meet up with you after?”

“Great. Are you practicing on the field?” She tilts her head toward the door to the stadium, and I nod. “Okay, I’ll just watch until then.”

Watch me? Great. As if I don’t have enough to think about with this team of misfits, I now have her scrutinizing me too.

“You don’t have to do that. I know how much you hate football.”

“It’s never been about hating football. It’s about having a hard time watching a certain player on the field.” She smirks, her eyes taking in my chest as she bites down on her bottom lip. She looks hungry, feral even. Is she flirting? After everything that happened?

I straighten my shoulders and harden my jaw. “Okay, I guess I’ll see you in a few hours.”

Turning on my heel, I cringe at how stilted and awkward that whole exchange was, but it wasn’t like it could go any other way. My ex, if I can call her that, is here, and she wants to talk, so I guess that’s what we’re going to do.

I played like crap today, but who could blame me? Bella Summers, the girl who flipped my life upside down, was watching me from the bleachers. The girl I wanted to get over and never think about again came waltzing back into my life as though nothing happened.

Am I that much of a masochist that I would let her break me again?

It doesn’t help that every time I look at her, all I see are her big doe eyes and puffy lips, constantly reminding me how much I loved kissing her.

My hands are clasped on the table as I twiddle my thumbs. We haven’t said so much as a few pleasantries since I picked her up from the bleachers and took the short walk to a bar just off campus.

Her feet accidently touch mine under the table, and I immediately lean back, ensuring my bulky body is completely devoid of her touch.

Taking a long swig of my water, Bella fingers the rim of her soda can and watches it with sadness. “Why are you here, B?” I ask it in the softest, nicest way possible, but it still feels confrontational.

“You didn’t say goodbye.” It’s a short statement that rips me to the core. Tilting my head, I study her frown. “When you left, you didn’t tell me. I know we weren’t on the best terms, but you treated me like I meant nothing at all to you, and I...I...I didn’t like it.”

When she gets the words out, I drop my gaze to the table. How do I explain why? “I’m sorry. Leaving St. Michael’s was all so rushed. Coach thought leaving without a fuss would help diffuse the situation.”

“And you thought leaving me behind would help it, too? You changed your number. You ghosted me.” Her eyes grow wide with realization. “Oh my God. That was the plan all along, wasn’t it? I’m such an idiot for coming here. You wanted a clean break, and here I am, acting like a clingy ex-girlfriend.”

When the word girlfriend drops out of her mouth, I don’t know what to think. I’d been waiting for her to admit we were together for the longest time, and now she does it when it’s too late.

As I take her hands, I feel them shaking, so I softly rub my thumb against her skin. “It’s not like that at all, B. You should know that. I knew I had to leave you. I didn’t want to draw it out. It wasn’t so simple as just leaving you and never looking back.”

“It never is with us, is it?”

“Is that why you came to LA?” I ask skeptically. “To let me know you were upset that I didn’t tell you I was leaving? Because that seems like a pretty drastic and expensive move,” I joke, trying to lighten the mood. I hurt her, but she hurt me too.

“It was on my way.”

“To?”

“London.” Biting down on her lip, she slips her hands away from mine, placing them under the table. “After you left, I did some serious soul-searching. St. Michael’s wasn’t the same without you there, and I didn’t like that you took all the blame for what happened. So, I told them.”

“Told who, what?”

“I told the Dean of students and my dad the truth. That I lured you in there, and you had no idea what was happening.”

“Bella-” She raises her hand, stopping me in my wake.

“I had to do it, Drew. It wasn’t right for me to stay there after what I did. Especially since Brianna took most of the heat for it.”

I wince, remembering the phone call I got from her when I landed.

“She’s fine now,” Bella assures. “The whole thing has long been forgotten, and she’s dating some guy on the wrestling team. He’s like seven feet tall and has muscles bigger than John Cena, so no one messes with her.”

“Good.”

“Thought you’d be happy about that.” There’s a bitterness in her tone that I’m used to hearing when we’re talking about Brianna, but I’m surprised it’s still there. “Do you guys still talk?”

I shake my head. “Nah. Not much left to say.”

She tips her chin, pursing her lips.

“Is that why you came here? To tell me you were angry I didn’t say goodbye and ask me about Brianna?”

She cracks an awkward smile, which is something she’s been doing a lot of on this impromptu visit. “Ah, not exactly.” She strokes her braid, trying to diffuse any simmering tension.

I take another swig of my drink, waiting for her to continue. “This whole thing seemed like a good idea when I was on the plane, but now I’m just not sure how the hell I say this.”

“By saying it.” I’m blunter than she’s probably used to. “Look, Bella. I’m all for having you come to visit me, but this whole beating around the bush thing isn’t going to work anymore. I’m done pandering to it.”

Her hands drop, and she swallows in surprise. “You know what. You’re right. I’ve got a flight to catch. I just wanted to say that I’m sorry about what happened. I did try to speak to my dad to get you out of trouble, but he refused to listen. Have a nice life, Drew.” She scrambles out of the booth and starts running to the door. By the time I’ve caught up with her, she’s outside the bar hobbling toward the open park area. She has no idea where she’s going; yet, she’d rather risk walking through a shady park in LA than talk to me.

Running away from her problems was always Bella’s style, but today, I’m not going to let her. Too much has happened between us. She followed me out here, and I will find out why.

Bella doesn’t look back, so she has no idea how close I am to catching up to her. I can hear her wheezing and notice the uneven gait in her stance. Clearly, her leg still hasn’t healed after four months.

She darts behind a tree, relaxes against it, and lets out a small squeal when I catch up to her. “Bella,” I grit out, blocking her in with my body and covering her from sight. “What else did you want to say?”

In all honesty, when I landed on LA soil all those months ago, I wanted to forget about Bella and move on from everything that happened. It worked for a while. Football was my only focus, and I felt like I was making a real difference with the team.

But then she had to just stop by, didn’t she?

That perfect braid. Her twinkling eyes. Those dimples. Everything about Bella was designed to draw me in, and I refuse to let her leave without finding out more.

“I already told you. I’m here because I need my hairbrush back.”

Her eyes have been glued to my feet since I caught up with her, so I gently place one finger underneath her chin and tip it up. Her big blue eyes plead with me, and I know that look well. It’s when she wants to be let off the hook. She’s hoping I’ll do that for her since I’ve done it so many times before. She seems to forget I’m a persistent fucker when I want something, and right now, I want the truth.

“That’s a lie, B. You didn’t come all the way to Los Angeles for that or to tell me that you left St. Michael’s. There’s gotta be more to it.”

Come on, B.

Bella sniffles and her eyes dart over my shoulder. She’s doing everything she can to not have to look at me. I want to laugh because she’s being ridiculous. She’s come all the way out here to see me, and she still can’t admit why.

She scrapes a hand across her face, and groans like I’ve just broken her leg all over again. “I missed you, okay? Everything sucks without you around. I know I’ve always been a little selfish.” I snort at that comment, and she tilts her head petulantly. “I know I never considered other people’s feelings, yours especially, but I really did like you. Not putting a label on it made me feel like I had more control over the situation than I did. It made it easier to deny just how much you meant to me. Then everything happened.” She waves her hand over her face in disgust, not wanting to remember the way we left things. “And I faced the reality of being without you for the first time since I can remember. You were gone, and that fact hit me harder than I ever thought it could.”

She drops her head onto the tree trunk, exasperated by the admission, but she’s not done yet.

“What reality?”

Cringing, she sighs. “That I love you.” She blurts it out with so much anger and intensity, I don’t fully process it.

“What?” “You’re going to make me say it again, aren’t you?” She groans. “I love you, Drew.” She screams it louder, her voice echoing across the park. A few people sitting on the lawn clap, and although she notices, I’m too focused on the blonde firecracker in front of me to care about anyone else. With her eyes wide and her lips parted, she looks perfect, and I want her just as badly as the first day I met her. “In fact, if I really think it over, I don’t think there was ever a time that I didn’t love you. Even when we were thirteen, and you whacked me in the head with that stupid ball, I thought you were an angel. You’ve always been there, in the back of my mind, like a taunting presence. You’re all I’ve ever wanted, but I’ve always known I couldn’t have you. You’re too perfect and too good for me.” She’s hardly taken a breath since she started her declaration. Her eyes are watery, her shoulders slumped like she’s a defeated soldier, and for the first time, I can see the tiredness marred across her face. Still beautiful, she looks like she hasn’t slept peacefully in months. Maybe she hasn’t.

“Bella,” I breathe out. She doesn’t look up because her cheeks are reddening.

Before I can get a word in, she continues. “When you left, I thought it would be okay. That I’d get over it and everything that happened between us, but even though the seasons changed, my feelings didn’t. You took a piece of me with you when you left, and I tried to get it back, but I couldn’t. Me without you would never work. I need you more than I ever thought I would.”

Tears well in her eyes when she finally dares to make eye contact with me. “And then you left without saying goodbye. I fucked up, I know. But I could never imagine leaving you without one final kiss. You broke me more than I broke you, and now I’m just trying to piece together who I am without you.”

That’s enough. I don’t want to hear any more of her babbling. I want to show her how I feel about her. “Bella,” I say, but she’s not listening, too caught up in her own admission. “Bella,” I drawl out her name, even cupping her cheeks in my hand, but still no acknowledgment.

Fine.

Pushing her body back against the tree, she groans in what I hope is pleasure. Even dropping my lips against hers isn’t enough to get her to stop the random muffles of words that I can’t make out. “Bella, just shut up and let me kiss you.”

“O-”

I swallow the rest of the word, kissing her until she relaxes in my arms.