Chapter 26

Chapter Twenty-Six

True to his word, Samuel had not returned to the hunting party for the remainder of the week, and Oliver reported his cousin was off to Plymouth in search of Oliver's father. Ryland welcomed four additional friends the morning after he kissed Aurelia, and his days were filled with entertaining them, leaving him no time to see her.

When he had designed this house party, it was meant as a distraction—as he had always done before. Now that it was here, however, it was not the distraction he wanted. He'd have much preferred sitting with Aurelia and Edmund in the library or walking the garden with them or listening to Edmund recite the Latin he was learning.

Instead, he spent each day watching Aurelia and Edmund take part in those activities from a distance while his friends needed his attention.

They had gone shooting each afternoon, eaten their fill each evening, played cards far into the night, and slept well into the morning. It had been a perfect shooting party, by all accounts.

So why was Ryland counting the days until it could be over?

Oh, very well. He knew exactly why, and it involved more of what had happened the other night in the corridor outside Aurelia's bedchamber. He hadn't been able to remove her kiss from his mind. It consumed him when he wasn't with her, growing worse whenever he saw her with Edmund and he couldn't join them.

"You seem extremely distracted, son," Wycliffe said, leaning over the billiards table and hitting his ball. He straightened, resting the end of his mace on the floor.

Most of Ryland's friends were playing cards or lounging on the sofa with their after-dinner bourbon, but Ryland and his stepfather had started a game of billiards. His younger brother, Tom, was upstairs with Edmund, accompanied by Ruth and Aurelia. What did it say about Ryland that he'd much rather have been with them?

"I am distracted," he admitted. "Enjoy it, Wycliffe. It is the only way you will win, I wager."

Wycliffe laughed. "Very true."

Ryland took his turn and stepped back, leaning his mace on the floor.

"Do you need to talk about anything?" Wycliffe asked, his attention on lining his mace up with the balls.

Ryland watched the balls on the green wool. He had never found a confidante in his stepfather before—never had the need. His mother was a sound, reasonable person and her advice always saw him through tough situations. This time felt different. He valued and appreciated Wycliffe, but they had never been close before.

He did not wish to raise his mother's hopes in regard to his feelings toward another woman—not until he knew for certain what to tell her. Would Aurelia accept him if he offered for her? She had spurned the chance at marrying Smedley in order to remain with Edmund, but was that because she didn't desire Smedley or because she didn't desire marriage ? Ryland liked to think it was because she'd chosen him and Edmund and all of Tilton, but he had not asked her outright.

Maybe confiding in Wycliffe was the best option. He spun the mace in his fingers. "I think I've fallen in love."

Wycliffe hit the balls hard, missing his shot and scraping the point of the mace along the wool. He frowned, raising his eyes. "You chose that moment to distract me."

Ryland shook his head, laughing. "The timing was suspicious. I agree."

"Is it true?" Wycliffe raised his eyebrows.

"Yes."

Wycliffe put the mace down and folded his arms over his chest. He stared through narrowed eyes. "You think you have fallen in love, son, or you have fallen in love?"

He had immediately gotten to the meat of Ryland's discomfort. "I do not know." He reached for his pocket watch and rubbed his thumb along the back of it. "I still love Jane. Wholly. She is important to me, and I cannot help but miss her immensely."

"You have similar feelings for another woman?"

"Yes. It is altogether confusing."

Wycliffe leaned back against the billiards table. "That is the beauty of love. It does not have limits. You do not need to sacrifice your feelings for one to have the other. You may love Jane, Edmund, your mother, your sister, your brother, and this new woman. If you have children in the future, your love for them would not take away that which you feel for Edmund, would it?"

"No," Ryland said at once, the very idea of future children making his breath hitch.

"Then why would it be any different for romantic love? Jane was taken from you too soon. You had no choice in the matter. Part of you will always love her. But the love you will feel for a second wife—if you make that choice, of course—will be different. It will be no less for its differences, but it will not be quite the same."

"Is that how you felt when you married my mother?"

"Yes. I will always love Ruth's mother. Nothing can take away from that. What I have with Helena is special in its own way. She would say the same about your father—in fact, I know she has. Part of her will always love him. We have each other now, and our love is pure and strong and true, just as our first loves were."

Ryland felt unaccountably emotional at this declaration. No, not unaccountably. He appreciated hearing that his mother's second husband loved her so fiercely. It had never been a secret, but neither had he asked about Wycliffe's first wife. He hadn't felt he could.

Wycliffe rubbed a hand over his chin, his smile affectionate. "I did not imagine Helena would accept me when I asked, but I was glad she took a chance on me. We have built a beautiful life together. You and Ruth are close, and I am grateful our families were able to blend so well."

Ryland adored his sister. He liked Tom, but he didn't know his brother as well. But Ruth—she was his sister, no blood relation required.

He had always imagined his life, growing old with Jane and their many children, content on their estate, enjoying their horses and the beautiful Hampshire countryside. Life had not turned out the way he had imagined, but it had provided many examples of people who had created their own happy endings—Eliza and Jacob Ridley; Mother and Wycliffe. None of their families were conventional, but that did not make them any less fulfilling. Each of them brimmed with love.

"It is Aurelia Beswick," he whispered, afraid of being overheard.

Wycliffe did not hide his surprise. "I am happy for you."

Ryland appreciated the lack of judgment. He was well aware that marrying his son's governess could send a flurry of gossip through the countryside, but did he care?

Wait, marriage ? The thought had slipped out before he'd actively considered it, but he could sense how badly he wanted it to be his future. He could imagine a life full of light with Aurelia by his side.

"Her brother is Nathaniel Beswick," he finally said.

Wycliffe let out a slow sigh. "I wondered if there was a relation. Does that bother you?"

"Not anymore."

"Your mother once told me that your name means brave . Did you know that? She thought Andrew was a strong choice for a future earl."

Ryland hadn't known this. He gripped his mace, his knuckles white.

"As I've watched you grow and face different challenges through your life, it has been exceedingly clear to me that your given name and its meaning are fitting. You are a brave man, Ryland. You always have been. You can face these challenges as you've faced difficulties in the past, with equanimity and confidence. Whatever you choose, we will continue to stand behind you. Your family loves you, son."

Ryland heard the meaning buried within—that Wycliffe loved him. His body brimmed with warmth. "Thank you."

Pike approached, a worried expression on his brow.

"What is it?" Ryland asked, his mind immediately jumping to Edmund or Aurelia.

"There is a man at the door asking for Miss Beswick, my lord. Shall I allow her to see him?"

His stomach swooped. Without meaning to, he glanced around the room until his gaze landed on Smedley and a sense of relief went through him. "Who is it?"

Pike lowered his voice. "Claims he is her brother, sir."

Nathaniel.

Ryland stiffened, his entire body tensing. He looked at his stepfather, hoping for guidance.

Wycliffe merely shrugged. "This is your choice to make."

"Show him into the study," Ryland said. "I would like to speak to him first."

"Of course, sir." Pike turned away.

"He is fresh from Newgate," Ryland explained. "I'm not privy to the details, but I do not have a good feeling about this."

"Nor do I," Wycliffe agreed. "Shall I accompany you?"

Ryland thought of the years Nathaniel had tormented him at school—hiding fish in his room and drawing obscene images in his schoolbooks. He had locked Ryland from his room on more than one occasion, forcing him to sleep in the cold corridor, and convinced one of their mathematics teachers Ryland had been cheating. He had pretended to befriend Ryland only to steal his work. Nathaniel had been a terrible boy.

Could he have grown into a better man?

No. Ryland had made the mistake of trusting him again after university, only to learn that he'd used Ryland for his title. He couldn't trust the man, surely, but could he trust that Aurelia was safe seeing her brother?

There was only one way to find out. He needed to face Nathaniel.

"I will go alone."

Tom and Edmund worked on their stocking puppets all through the evening, allowing Ruth and Aurelia the opportunity to observe them from a distance and chat comfortably in the schoolroom's window seat. Ruth outlined the list of rules she had created to keep unwanted suitors at bay.

Aurelia found most of Ruth's rules to be amusing, if slightly silly. "Are these rules entirely unbreakable? What if you fall in love with a man from Harewood?"

Ruth straightened, her smile slipping. "I will not."

"You are so certain of that fact?"

"That is why I have rules, Aurelia. To keep exactly that from happening."

So, Ruth was entirely in earnest after all. Aurelia looked through the dark window behind them, the moon shining bright over Tilton's land. "You will make no exceptions?"

"I cannot. If I allow exceptions for one thing, then everything loses its power."

"I see." Though in some ways, she felt the rules were unnecessary. "Do you plan to attend the Season?"

"Yes. I will find a man, fall helplessly in love, and none of my rules will matter there."

Aurelia reached over and squeezed Ruth's hand. "I hope that is the case for you."

A knock preceded Christopher's entrance. He poked his head into the schoolroom, looking about until he landed on Aurelia. When he saw Ruth, however, he hesitated.

"What is it?" Aurelia asked, sitting up.

Christopher looked again at Ruth.

"You may speak plainly," she said, alarm racing through her limbs.

He sighed. "A man arrived, Miss Beswick. Says he needs to speak with you."

Cold ice slid down her stomach. There were only two men who knew to find her here—her father and Mr. Larson the barrister. If either of them were arriving in this manner, it could not be for any good reason. "Who?"

"Don't know, but he went into the study. His lordship wanted to speak with him first." His gaze shifted to Ruth and back. "You haven't been sent for, precisely."

She understood. "Thank you, Christopher. Will you send Tilly up to stay with Edmund?"

"I will stay with Edmund," Ruth said, "until she arrives."

"Thank you." Aurelia stood, following Christopher into the corridor and toward the stairs. She put a hand on his arm. "Thank you for telling me."

"Of course, Miss Beswick. We must stick together."

She smiled. If the servants all knew she'd kissed their lordship in the dead of night, would they still count her as one of their own? She pushed the thought aside. "I will not reveal who told me of this."

He nodded, slipping away to fetch Tilly.

Aurelia hurried down the stairs, her heart racing harder with each step, both from fear someone had brought her bad news and from a sense of eagerness because she would get to see Ryland. It had been days since the night she had kissed him, and with the guests requiring so much of his attention, she hadn't seen him for any great length of time.

She still felt so uncertain, wondering where they were meant to go from there. She would be glad when the party left and she wouldn't have to fear seeing Smedley every time she turned a corner. She'd avoided him well enough so far. After hearing he was still interested in marrying her, she knew it was vital.

Aurelia stopped when she reached the study, glad to find the corridor empty. The men had spent their evenings in the drawing room thus far and, given the noise coming from it, tonight was no different. The sounds of laughter and billiards balls colliding floated through the corridors. She was glad to know they were all on the other side of the house.

Pressing her ear to the crack in the study door, she closed her eyes and listened, inhaling whiffs of wood polish.

Nothing.

Drat the solid wood and its ability to block sound. She turned around, huffing out a breath. The visitor was there to see her , so surely she could open the door.

But she had not been sent for.

Her eyes fell upon the library opposite and she had an idea. Moving swiftly through the dark, she made her way into the library and felt her way along the bookshelves to the end of the room where the hidden door was. Her fingers fumbled among the decorative paneling, where Ryland had shown her the lever. She found it and pressed the release, feeling the door come away from its latch. It was heavy, leaning against her. She held it in place and peeked through the opening.

Aurelia smothered a gasp when her eyes fell upon Ryland's visitor. Nathaniel was here. She supposed it would have been easy for him to find her—Mr. Larson knew exactly where she was. But why was he here ? What exactly did he need?

"You have done well for yourself," Nathaniel said, looking around the study.

Ryland must have bit his tongue. His jaw worked, the muscle jumping. "What do you need from her, Beswick? I will not send for your sister without a clear understanding of your motives here. By your own admission, you have been released from prison for over a fortnight now, so I do not believe the story that you miss her." He gestured toward Nathaniel's face. "Especially not with that ghastly thing. Explain yourself or you may leave my house."

Aurelia's heart thundered. She'd never heard such authority ring from Ryland's voice before, and it made her blood sing. She liked him defending her like this. She couldn't recall when anyone had done that for her before—even her father, upon losing his fortune, left her to fend for herself.

Nathaniel turned, looking again around the room as though it held the answers. Aurelia held her breath, hoping no one would notice the slight break in the wall beside the bookcase. At least the library was utterly dark behind her.

When he glanced over his shoulder, she sucked in a breath. A large, dark bruise marred the skin around his eye and bled down to his nose. He'd been in some sort of fight.

"I haven't much time, Beswick," Ryland growled.

"Yes, yes. You're a busy man." Nathaniel's derision was clear. "But you have no right to come between family. Allow me to speak to her."

"Why?"

"She has something of mine, and I need it back."

Aurelia's stomach clenched uncomfortably. She hadn't taken a thing from Nathaniel.

"That is not enough information," Ryland said. His hand was playing with something on the desk, spinning it in his fingers.

"Who are you to keep me from my sister?" Nathaniel spat. "What is she to you?"

His growing vitriol was concerning. He must have put himself in a precarious position to be arguing like this.

Ryland rubbed a hand over his face. He looked toward Aurelia and froze.

Oh, drat . Had he seen her? She held her breath, waiting to see what he would do. He turned his attention back on Nathaniel. "Allow us to compromise. I will inquire with Aurelia and ask if she'd like to speak to you, then return with an answer."

"You'd use my sister's Christian name?" Nathaniel asked. "What sort of house is this? I was told she came to be your son's governess." In his defense, he sounded exceedingly disturbed.

Ryland merely sounded as though he was reaching the end of his patience. "It is a respectable house, and she is well-cared for."

"I'll say," Nathaniel expostulated. "What of my sister's honor?"

"Her honor is intact," Ryland said icily. He put the item down on the desk and stood. "Wait here. I will return shortly." He strode from the room without waiting for a response.

Aurelia remained at the bookshelf, watching to make sure Nathaniel did not do anything foolish now that he was left alone.

"There you are, my little spy," came a deep voice just behind her.

She yelped and closed the bookshelf with a snap.

Drat. He had seen her.