Chapter Twenty-Three

“Do you want to call into the castle on our way back? It would only be about an hour’s ride out of our way.” Avalon glanced at his husband who’d been riding quietly beside him. They were making their way back to the ship after a night spent camping, away from the mountains, but still in Lowenthorp territory.

His men had arrived at the caves, just as Jasper had said they would, flushed, out of breath, their horses sweating they’d been ridden so hard. So, a stop was necessary. Camping for the night also gave Duncan a chance to voice his opinions on Jasper’s magic usage causing Avalon’s disappearance.

Words such as “careless,” “thoughtless,” “dangerous,” and “irresponsible” had been used more than once, along with a lot of “What were you thinking?” And Duncan hadn’t been stingy in his critique, targeting both Avalon and Jasper equally. But then Merlin complimented Jasper on his new look, which went some way towards quelling Duncan’s anger. Avalon had a mental chuckle at the time because it took Merlin’s comment for Duncan to even notice, he was that het up about Jasper using his magic to spirit Avalon away.

Words were said, opinions expressed, everyone agreed it wasn’t going to happen again, and now it was the next day, and they were heading back to the ship. Jasper had been quiet. Avalon didn’t get the impression he was closed off or fretting about anything. He’d slept in Avalon’s arms, which caused Avalon to have physical reactions he hadn’t had for the longest time, but the night was peaceful for Jasper, by all accounts.

“The fork in the road is coming up,” Avalon added when Jasper seemed to be thinking. “We can go in either direction – the ship or the castle.”

“Did you want to visit with the Queen? Is that expected?”

Avalon frowned. Jasper was speaking much like he had when they had first met – unsure of himself – and Avalon didn’t like that. He really loved the confidence Jasper had shown since he realized his magic could summon the creatures of the sea. Avalon wanted to see that confidence back.

“We don’t have to do anything we don’t want to do. Merlin sent messages to Queen Fiona last night while he was making the report for the World Council, assuring her the trouble was contained and taken care of. He didn’t provide her any details of course, but Merlin did assure her that you and she would both be safe going forward.”

“I must remember to thank him,” Jasper said quietly.

“As for now,” Avalon continued, “I wasn’t sure what you wanted to do. I thought we could sail around a bit more, as that’s something you seem to enjoy. Take a lazy cruise through to Cijan in the next week or so. I only offered that we visit the Queen now because I can’t guarantee when we might be in this part of the world again. Although if you wanted to visit for any reason, anytime, I’d do my best to make it happen.”

“I know you would.” Jasper’s quick smile relieved some of Avalon’s anxiety. But then Jasper looked around. “I feel I could do with your advice about this before making a decision, but there are people…”

Avalon immediately understood. Calling out to Duncan who was riding ahead with Merlin, he said, “Wait for us by the fork in the road, if you will. Jasper and I will be there directly.”

Duncan glowered and was probably muttering something rude under his breath. Avalon wasn’t sure he’d even be allowed to sleep without Duncan outside his door until the man got over the events of the day before. He encouraged his horse to the side of the trail, and Jasper quickly followed, letting the guards who’d been riding behind them move past.

“Is this about your mother?” Avalon asked once the last guard was far enough away that he couldn’t hear their conversation. “I know we didn’t get much of a chance to discuss anything last night, thanks to our friends.”

“Duncan needed the chance to have his say. I think he was remarkably constrained given the circumstances,” Jasper said. “My behavior was irresponsible, but fortunately I can’t think of any other instance when it might happen again. But yes, regarding the Queen, I don’t know what to do. Is it even all right for me to consider her my mother? I’m not sure I can face her right now, knowing what I do.”

“I did wonder, after what Joseph said, if it was that knowledge the Queen was hoping we wouldn’t find out,” Avalon said slowly, keeping his voice low. “Her message was so cryptic, and we imagined it might have had something to do with me learning about your magic, or something similar. Without blatantly asking her…”

“But if we ask her, then she would know we both know,” Jasper said quickly. “I’m not sure, but I think that information, or at least our knowledge of it, would be upsetting to her, wouldn’t it? I’d hate to do that when she’s done nothing wrong in any of this.”

“You know your mother better than most.” Avalon really didn’t have a clue what Queen Fiona was thinking or how she would react to what they’d learned. “I do believe there’s nothing wrong in you continuing to refer to her as your mother – you implied yourself, back at the caves, she wanted to keep you with her not because of any malicious intent, but because when she found out about your magic, she likely feared every day that you would be taken. She wasn’t wrong in her concerns. It was just the reasons you were taken were different from any she’d likely anticipated.”

“I never doubted my mother’s love and affection for me, or for all of her children for that matter. My father, when he was alive, always made sure he knew we were valued, too. If there was a difference in how mothers raise children they adopt rather than give birth to themselves, then I never experienced that. I’m just not sure I can look her in the eyes, without her realizing that we know everything.”

“Ah, yes.” Avalon nodded. “The amazing power all mothers have of knowing more about their children’s thoughts, than the child does themselves. I remember those days fondly. I don’t think that changes even when the child is an adult. It’s a valid concern, especially if you believe it would upset her.”

Avalon shifted in his seat, his horse happy to stand in the shade for a moment longer. “I have to confess I’m not overly keen on visiting there right now either, if you want the truth of it. While I have no issue seeing and speaking to your mother, it’s Luigi’s presence that would concern me most. Knowingly or not, he contributed to the circumstances around your abduction, and I’m not sure I can look him in the eye without wanting to punch him in his face.”

Hand over his mouth, Jasper suddenly burst out laughing. “I’ve thought of doing that so many times. He can be such an entitled ass,” he said between chuckles, wiping a stray tear from his newly restored eye. “So, you won’t think it’s awful of me if we don’t visit there right now? It’s not a breach of protocol, or considered rude among royal families?”

“Technically we’re on a mission for the World Council, so no, it’s not expected that we visit.” Realizing Jasper would prefer to have the decision taken out of his hands, Avalon said, “I think, despite being married barely a week, we’ve not had much of a chance to get to know each other as newlyweds. I get the impression you don’t have an issue with ship life. It would be nice, in my opinion, for us to take some time learning to be around each other before we jump headlong into the social event that I know my father is organizing for later this month.”

“I would like that.” Jasper’s smile was wide this time. “We might see some more creatures.”

“If that’s what you’re hoping for, I also need to spend time teaching you to swim,” Avalon chuckled as Jasper’s eyes twinkled. “You may have an affinity with water, but you’d find it easier, and Duncan would find it a lot less stressful, if you knew how to move around the water under your own volition.”

“My swimming wasn’t awful.” Avalon realized Jasper was teasing him. “The fish found my efforts amusing.”

“Well, maybe, if we’re in the sea together, you might call a few of your underwater friends closer so I can meet them. I think that would be an incredible experience.”

“You’d really enjoy that? You wouldn’t think it was weird?”

Avalon nudged his horse closer to his husband’s. “My precious husband,” he said, his voice deepening, “after what we’ve been through since we’ve been married, I don’t think I would consider anything as weird again – especially when it concerns you. It’s all gloriously normal when you’re with me.”

Jasper looked down at his hands, and then just as quickly looked up, his chin proud. “Thank you. That does make me feel accepted, I suppose that would be the right word, something I’ve not experienced with others before. You should know I have thought of your words spoken in the cave almost constantly since they were vocalized. I hope you realize I have those same strong feelings for you in return, even if I couldn’t stop and give your declaration proper consideration in the moment those words were spoken.”

Avalon’s body flooded with warmth as he recognized how much courage it took for his husband to say those words. “I did believe my feelings were reciprocated, yes, and that is very precious to me.”

“My magic feels your words even in those moments where I might struggle to believe them.” Jasper looked off in the direction of where the guards had gone. They were hidden by a turn in the trail, but Duncan and Merlin were on their horses, situated so they could see both the guards, and Avalon and Jasper. “It is for that reason, because I know your words to be true, I wished to speak to you privately about an intimate matter.”

“Out here, on the trail?” with Duncan and Merlin lurking?

“Yes. In fact, I feel more inclined to speak of this here, than if we were in a more comfortable and private setting.” Jasper inhaled sharply. “Back, when we were making our plans to take care of the people who harmed me, you gave me chocolate, and you wanted to know the details of what I had been through.”

Avalon remembered, although heading in the opposite direction to those caves, he had to wonder why he thought those details were so important. But Jasper had clearly been thinking about it while they were riding and rushed on.

“I promised, if those details were something you were still desperate to know when the situation was resolved, I would tell you. The premise of affection between us, the possibility that we are making a journey to being so much more than friends, compels me to mention this now before we get on the ship. I want to put my past behind us once and for all, as much as we possibly can. So, tell me now, if you have a mind to, how much do you need to know to feel comfortable with me in any possibly intimate and private setting going forward?”

“You’ve changed so much in a matter of just a few days.” As soon as he knew the words Avalon could feel the truth of them. It wasn’t just his eye and hair Jasper had recovered, it was his confidence – that hint of steel in his spine Avalon had recognized from the very first day they’d met, and the combination was sexy.

“I believe that as I could trust you to spirit me through the air to a random destination, and I know with a deep certainty in my soul you would protect me in all things as I would you, that if for some reason I was ever so crass as to do anything around you, or to you, that caused you any discomfort in any way, then you would let me know.”

“You know I would.”

“Then I think the same as you do, that we should put this matter behind us, and move forward towards a future of our own making, that involves whatever intimate acts two people who are affectionate and caring with each other might do.” Avalon felt his cheeks heat. “You should probably know that, for me, this is all still hypothetical. I have strong feelings for you, but I’m not experienced in the ways of men. I do feel we could find our way together, though, don’t you think?”

“You’re not?” Jasper’s eyes widened. “I mean, me neither, and yes. That could make things both fun and interesting, don’t you think?”

“I’m guessing some things are instinctual.” Avalon chuckled, as he gathered his horse’s reins, readying to move. “We’ll find out in our own time. But please remember, should thoughts of your past ever intrude at any time, and you want to talk, please know you can.”

“Thank you.” Jasper’s smile was sweet.

“Right. Well, now, as much as I would love to gently kiss your lips, as a means of cementing our agreement, I am not doing that for the first time on the trail when we are both sweaty and smelling of horse. Are you ready to leave Lowenthorp and head back to our ship?”

“A shower, and a decent bed, with the possibility of a kiss, that all sounds like a perfect idea.”