Chapter Eighteen

Daddy’s Girl

I was once again in that space where shit just felt...off.

There was an explanation this time, but no solution in sight, which was as helpful as a bag of nails when trying to change a tire.

I went the one place where I didn’t have to think. Of course, that meant that I ended up in my parents’ front room, an acoustic guitar propped in my lap as I absentmindedly plucked at the strings. My mama took one look at my face, stared me down for a long minute, and then pulled me in for a tight hug before setting me loose. She left me to my own devices and my daddy replaced her presence less than five minutes later.

“What’s going on with you and Juleesa?”

Sighing, I closed my eyes and hung my head as I continued playing the random tune. I sought out this music room in hopes of escaping the signs of Jucee in my own home, but I should’ve known that I wouldn’t be able to go too long without hearing her name. Not with how entangled our lives had become. And especially not with the way my mama had mugged me when she opened the door fifteen minutes earlier. I honestly expected my daddy to appear in the doorway sooner.

Unsure of how I wanted to answer his question, I boomeranged another back at him.

“What made you ask that, Daddy?”

My eyes were still closed, but I heard the soft slap of his house shoes against the wood as he moved farther into the room. The rush of air leaving the cushions of the chair on my right let me know he sat beside me. Once he settled, the slow, deliberate inhalation of breath through his nose alerted me that he was about to speak.

“Well,” he began in that easygoing tone that always brought me comfort like a warm blanket on a cold day, “your mama said Juleesa has declined her invitation for lunch three times in two weeks. I thought she was being a little dramatic—that Juleesa is probably just busy—but hearing that solemn melody you’re playing told me everything I need to know.”

Immediately, my fingers stilled on the strings and my eyes popped open. That dull ache in my chest throbbed and I lifted a hand to rub at the spot. Twisting my neck, I turned to face my daddy. There was no judgment on his face. His brows were raised; the look he wore was expectant. He was waiting for me to tell him what was going on.

My face crumpled and eyes stung as I tried unsuccessfully not to cry.

“I fucked up,” I whined, setting the acoustic on the floor by my feet, feeling like I was eleven years old again and had to admit to my parents that I’d accidentally dropped a plate while washing dishes.

And just like he did back then, my daddy pulled me against his chest and let me cry it out while he rubbed my back and assured me that worse things had happened. Logically, I knew that he was right, but in that moment my world felt wonky. Everything was knocked off of its axis and nothing was running the way it was supposed to. It was weird because the only thing that changed was Jucee’s presence, but somehow that affected every aspect of my life excluding the music.

Except...according to my daddy, that was affected as well.

I sobbed harder. What the hell had I done? Every time I feel like things with Jucee are close to being perfect, they get fucked up. I fuck them up. Why couldn’t I just let things play out? Why did I have to ruin everything?

When I finished, my daddy leaned back and looked at me. I watched his eyes rove my face, taking in my damp cheeks and red eyes.

“You feel better?”

It was what he’d always asked us after giving us time to cry, and the familiar question made me smile. I nodded and moved back to my abandoned chair.

“Good.” He pinned me with a look. “Now, what are you going to do to fix things with Juleesa?”

“I don’t know if I can.”

“Did you try?”

Scoffing, I gave him a crazy look. “Of course I did! Nothing has worked!” Frustrated, I threw my hands up in the air.

His brows rose again, this time in response to my elevated tone.

“How about you start from the beginning for me, Star Shine? Help me understand what happened, because I’m in the dark here.”

“Juc—” I paused and shook my head. There was no way I could start from the true beginning. I’d always been able to tell my daddy everything, but I wasn’t so sure I was ready to admit out loud that this all happened because Jucee overheard me say something hurtful about her. I didn’t want to color my family’s impression of her, and I was certain that’s exactly what would happen if they knew the whole story.

“I said something ignorant and offensive. My words hurt Jucee and she stopped talking to me.”

“Ah.” Daddy nodded as if everything made sense. “Did you apologize?”

“I did! It was really heartfelt and everything but she didn’t respond.”

A slight frown came across his face. “She didn’t respond?”

I shook my head. “Nope.”

“What did she do? Just...walk away after you finished speaking?”

My lips parted but I froze in place.

Oh.

Shit.

I suddenly felt as if I was watching myself walk headfirst into a wall with no way to stop myself. It was like an out-of-body experience. I knew what was coming and yet I couldn’t prevent the crash from happening.

Groaning, I ran a hand down my face. “We weren’t face-to-face, Daddy. I sent her a text message.”

My daddy straightened, sitting up in his seat and facing me with his undivided attention.

“Did you offend her through text message, as well?”

The head-on collision was happening and all I could do was scream at myself to go the other direction. Closing my eyes, I dropped my head back against my chair.

“No. It was in person.”

“Let me make sure I understand you correctly. You insulted Juleesa in person—”

“I didn’t insult her—”

“—but instead of apologizing in person, you did it through the phone. And not even on a call, but via text message, the most impersonal form of communication known to man.”

“I think ‘most impersonal’ is stretching things a bit.”

“What else have you done to fix this?”

Scratching below my ear, I lifted my gaze to the ceiling. There was a paper-thin line of incredulity that hovered just beneath his neutral tone. It was slight, and if I didn’t know his voice as well as I did, I might’ve missed it. “I texted her twice.”

I waited for a response from him, but none came. Peeling my eyes open, I glanced his way, startled to find his piercing brown gaze.

“Hmm.”

I squinted at him. “What was that about?”

“What?”

“You made a sound. You harrumphed. What was that sound for? What are you trying to say, Daddy?”

He shrugged and leaned back in his chair, hands folded over his belly.

“You said something curious so I made a curious sound. Nothing more, nothing less.”

Rolling my eyes, I picked up the acoustic and placed it on its stand.

“Stop beating around the bush and speak your piece, old man.”

A slow grin eased onto his face, cheeks lifting high and making his eyes seem as if they were the sun disappearing behind a mountain. He was enjoying teasing me.

“Well, you said that nothing you’d tried had been working, but you only tried one thing.” He chuckled, clearly amused at my expense.

“Well, I—”

I cut off my excuse the moment he lifted a finger into the air.

“If the one thing you tried didn’t work, try something else. Maybe go to her in person and apologize. Bring her flowers, take her to dinner, and stop pretending to be too cool for love so you can have a chance to salvage things with her.”

I choked on the air. “Daddy—”

He pinned me with a look. “Yes, Star Shine?”

I couldn’t speak. Talking to my daddy about Jucee in this context had me frozen solid. I was but a mere statue perched at a piano.

“Hmm,” Daddy hummed. “I thought you were about to tell me that you weren’t in love with Juleesa. I’m glad you decided against lying.”

A strangled noise might’ve escaped my throat, but that was debatable.

He gave me an amused look. “When you’re finished, let’s go over your plan to get Jucee back. The sooner she starts accepting Carissa’s lunch invitations, the sooner I can get some peace at night.”