Chapter 10

CHAPTER10

When I arrived at my door with Evren at my back, I could see the trepidation in Eletta’s eyes. She didn’t trust him, and I couldn’t blame her.

I didn’t trust him either.

She had stayed by my side for the rest of the night. Drawing my bath and pouring oils into the water to help me relax. She combed the tangles from my hair as I stared into the small mirror and thought of how Evren’s touch had felt against my skin.

When she asked me if I was all right, I lied to the girl so easily.

But the way she watched my every move told me she didn’t believe a single word.

Part of me wondered if she could see the way I longed for him when she looked at me. She watched me so carefully, and I knew that Eletta wasn’t dumb. She saw more than most, and it was only a matter of time until she realized how deeply my want for the wrong prince went.

As soon as she left my room, I slipped my trousers on under the silk nightgown she had helped me into. I had to search for my boots, but finally found them tucked under the bed as if Eletta never wished to see them again.

I slipped my feet inside and wiggled my toes against the worn leather that felt so familiar and comfortable. I didn’t change from my gown until the fire in my room was low and there wasn’t a hint of sound coming from the hall.

I couldn’t do this. I couldn’t lie here in this gilded palace betrothed to a prince who was bad for me while I secretly lusted for another who was worse.

I had made my decision while I sank under the water of the bath, and I had stayed there until my lungs burned with need. I was going to run.

I wasn’t sure how far I would make it, but I knew that I would never forgive myself if I didn’t try. Sitting here and accepting what they wanted from me made me as bad as my mother.

And I refused to be like her. My father died trying to protect me, and my mother so willingly handed me over to the people who murdered him. I refused to do the same.

I refused to waste his sacrifice with blind obedience.

I quickly changed into one of my shirts and tucked it into my trousers before pulling my dagger from beneath my pillow and sliding it into my boot. The feel of it against my leg brought me comfort, and I took a deep breath before opening the door slowly and peeking into the hall.

I didn’t see anyone. Not a single guard or servant. The halls were hollow and silent, and I gently closed the door behind me, careful to not disturb the palace’s slumber.

I didn’t bother grabbing any more of my things. Everything I took was just one more thing to slow me down, and I couldn’t afford it. I was already so fearful of what they would do if they caught me, but I had to try.

I moved down the long hall toward the library, and I searched for the doorway I knew hid along the stone wall beyond the lamplight. I had seen it days ago, and I knew that it would be my easiest exit.

The door opened effortlessly, and the cool night air kissed my skin in a welcomed embrace. I looked back into the hall one last time before I stepped out of the palace. I should have been looking for anyone that could possibly see me, but deep down I knew that I was only looking for him.

I was looking for him, and it hit me in my gut how badly I needed to leave.

I slid outside, barely opening the door so no one would notice, and my heart felt like it was ready to beat out of my chest as the door closed softly behind me. The back of the palace was dark, but I knew that there would still be royal guards protecting all sides of the castle. I just had to sneak past them and manage to hide long enough until I could figure out how to get through the stone wall.

Nothing was impenetrable. I would climb over it if I had to, but that wasn’t ideal. I needed to cause as little commotion as possible.

I moved down the wall and peeked around the corner. There were two guards standing there, and one was laughing at something the other had said. Neither one of them noticed me. Two royal guards and neither sensed my presence.

I quickly made my way through the small courtyard, watching my back at every turn, and once I made it to the thin cropping of trees, I let out a small breath.

I moved through the trees until I pressed my hand against the cool stone of the wall. It was imposing and suffocating, and I knew that if there were no openings in the stone, then I was going to have to use the trees to help me climb the thing that held me trapped inside.

I moved slowly, careful of every step as I trailed down the wall looking for any changes in the structure.

I heard the snap of a twig, and I crouched down against the wall as I scanned the trees. There wasn’t an ounce of movement, but it was far too dark out to truly be sure. I stayed like that for a long moment, praying that what I heard was nothing more than an animal or my fear.

My fingers trembled as I ran them over my dagger. I was just about to pull it from its sheath when I heard more movement to my right. A man I didn’t recognize charged for me, and I couldn’t even manage a scream before his sweaty hand clamped down against my mouth and forced my head against the rocky earth.

Pain shot through me, and my vision blurred as I tried to kick his body from mine. But he was far too heavy and too strong.

“Hold fucking still, you star witch,” he spat at me while reaching for his pants, and my entire body froze with fear. I had no idea who this man was or what he wanted, but I knew that he wanted to hurt me one way or another.

He kept his hand over my mouth and his body pressed against mine as I struggled beneath him, and the scream I let out was muffled beneath his fingers as I watched him lift a small dagger. His hand fumbled with the weapon as he lifted it toward my chest, and I kicked my legs wildly to try to get him off me.

He wasn’t expecting the movement, and I managed to budge my chest from under his. I screamed at the top of my lungs as his fingers lost their grip on my mouth.

“Fuck,” he cursed and his hand came down hard on my upper thigh. I didn’t realize what had happened until the burning pain tore through my leg.

He dropped the dagger quickly as he stared down at the cut he had just made in my flesh, and I knew then what he wanted. He was watching my blood escape from my skin as if it was a gift from the gods. He pressed his fingers against the cut as I hissed in pain, and when he lifted his bloodied hand into the moonlight, I knew that was my only chance.

I lifted my other leg and kicked him in the chest with every bit of power I had. He groaned deep and loud as he fell to his side, and I quickly crawled back from him and grasped for anything I could to help aid in my escape.

“You bitch!” His stare was murderous as he brought his fingers to his mouth and licked my blood from his skin. “You are going to pay for that.”

I climbed to my knees before he could lunge for me again, but the sound of movement coming from the castle caught my attention. It caught his too.

He was to his feet before I could yell out again, and he disappeared through the trees as quickly as he came. Pain radiated from my leg as I tried to climb to my feet, and I heard one of the guards curse once they saw me.

“Get the prince,” one of them ordered before coming to stand before me. “Are you all right, Starblessed?”

I watched over his shoulder as two other guards took off in the direction that my assailant had just left.

“I think she might be in shock.”

“I’m okay,” I grumbled, and pressed my hand against a tree to take some of the pressure off my leg. “I just need to get to my room.”

The guards looked back and forth between one another. “You’re bleeding.”

“I’m well aware.” My hand tightened on my thigh, and I pushed off the tree to force myself back into the palace. I didn’t know what I was thinking. Here I was ready to run, ready to try to survive the world completely on my own, and I was attacked before I could even escape the wall.

I had a blaring reminder of who I was on my face and back, and no matter where I went, people would know. They would know what I was, and they would want and take from me as they pleased.

One of the guards reached out for my arm as I tried to pass him, and even though I wanted to refuse his help, I couldn’t. My leg hurt worse with every step I took, and my head began throbbing in pain. I knew it would only get worse until I got back to my room and assessed the damage.

Damage caused by someone who was currently on the castle grounds. I hadn’t recognized the man who attacked me, but I knew that he was nobility of some sort. He wasn’t wearing a uniform of the guard, and the fabrics he wore were far too fine to be a servant’s.

Which meant he was a trusted member of Gavril’s court.

“We’re almost there,” the guard spoke softly, and I knew that he could see the pain in my face. “I could carry you.”

“No.” I shook my head and powered on toward the door I had left from.

I tried not to think about what Gavril was going to do or say once he saw me. I had no way to explain why I was outside the palace after dark. He would know the truth without a single word of confession from my lips.

I knew that he would be furious with his future bride, and I feared what that fury would bring.

The guard opened the door and helped me through, and my chest tightened as we made it back into the hall. The lack of air I felt hit me immediately, and I tried to calm my rising panic.

Instead of leading me toward my room, the guard turned past the library and pressed his hand against the stone wall. I sucked in a shocked breath as the wall groaned and the stone moved as if the strength in his hand alone made it so.

He tried to tug me forward, but I dug my heels into the ground.

“This way, Starblessed.”

“Where are you taking me?” My voice didn’t sound like my own. The panic was evident, and I watched as pity flashed in the guard’s eyes.

“To the prince. Please don’t make me drag you there.”

I took a step forward, following him through the wall, and I blinked as the wall closed back behind us and the tight tunnel we stood inside came into view. It was dark inside the walls, but I could at least see in front of me as he led us down the small corridor and toward my consequences.

I could feel the blood coating my fingers with every step we took, and when he finally stopped and touched the wall again, I was desperate just to face the crowned prince and get this over with.

The wall opened to reveal the throne room, and I tightened my hold on the guard as I made my way into the light. But it wasn’t the crowned prince who waited on the other side.

It was worse.

“What the fuck happened to you?” Evren growled as he marched toward me, but the pain in my leg was almost too much for me to care.

“Nothing.” I shook my head and pressed my hand against my thigh. Blood had seeped through my fingers, and I clamped them together so he couldn’t see the damage.

“Like hell.” He reached for me, and I backed away until my heels hit the edge of the dais we were now standing in front of. “Let me see, princess.”

“No.” I stepped backward again, this time onto the dais that normally held his family higher than everyone else. The guard let me go, and I hated that he so quickly walked away and left me in the hands of the prince. “I want to go back to my room.”

“A room you were trying to escape from?” His anger seeped through his words as he moved toward me still.

He was staring at me with so much fury, and when I looked down at his dark-stained fingers, I remembered that this man was capable of so much more than I knew. My fear hammered in my chest, but I still winced when the back of my legs hit the throne behind me.

“Please, Evren. Just let me go back to my room.”

“Sit,” he said the word like a command, and I obeyed him instantly.

The air around him crackled as he knelt before me and pushed my knees apart with more force than necessary. His gaze darkened as he stared ahead at my bloodied hand, but I didn’t dare move it away from the wound.

“You are lucky,” he hissed the words between his teeth, and I winced at the venom they held.

“To be attacked?”

“To still be alive.” He lifted my trembling fingers away from my leg before letting out a curse. He pressed his own hand to my wound before reaching behind him with his other and pulling his dark shirt over his head. “You are lucky that my guards are loyal to their captain and came to me instead of the queen.”

He was kneeled before me with his chest bare, and even as his hand caused pain against the cut on my leg, I couldn’t stop myself from looking at him.

His body was sculpted in a way that could only be accomplished by years of work that wasn’t done inside this castle.

“What are you doing?” I tensed as he pulled his shirt down his arms and reached out for my hand to replace his.

He ripped at the fabric of his shirt, tearing a strip off entirely. His abs bunched and tensed as he worked methodically on the task at hand, and I straightened in the throne as I stared at his muscles.

He had a long scar across his chest, and I wondered if he had gotten it defending the throne at which I now sat.

“I need to get this on to stop the bleeding. Then I’ll take you back to my room, and we’ll clean the wound.” He slid the fabric under my leg and back around until he tied it in a tight knot.

“That’s not happening.”

His shoulders stiffened, and when he looked up at me, fear and lust mixed together and rushed through every part of me.

“Would you prefer that I take you to Gavril? To the queen? Would you like to explain to them how you were stupid enough to try to run from a palace filled with fae and managed to get yourself hurt by someone who craves the power in your blood more than they do the favor of the crown?”

“It doesn’t matter.” I squared my shoulders.

“The fuck it doesn’t matter, Adara.” He stood before reaching out for me and pulling me to my feet. He was angry, but he was still careful not to hurt my leg. “They wouldn’t be tending to your leg if they were the ones that found you. They would already have you locked up, and Gavril would be lapping at the blood seeping from your wound.”

“But you’re not going to?” I asked, and I could see the frustration eating at him.

“Does it look like I’m going to do either of those things? You may be a traitor to the crown, but I know what it’s like to feel trapped. I don’t blame you for trying.”

I looked away from him as my chest ached. I didn’t know what he wanted me to say. He could call me a traitor all he wanted, but being right here with him felt like the most traitorous act of all.

“Don’t fucking do it again.” He shook his head. “I’m already forced to watch you belong to my brother. I don’t want to watch them torture you as well.”

He bent down and gently slid his arm beneath my knees. He lifted me against his chest easily, and I quickly wrapped my arms around his neck before he dropped me. He started down the dais, and I tightened my hold on him.

“I can walk.”

“It’s easier and faster if I carry you,” he grumbled without stopping, and I winced as my leg jostled against his chest.

“I can still walk.”

“Fuck, Adara,” he hissed my name. “Can’t you just let me take care of you?”

I studied his face, and I knew it was foolish to think I could see his worry hiding behind his anger. Worry that caused my own heart to race.

“Who was that man who attacked me?”

He bit down on his bottom lip before he finally spoke. “I don’t know.” He moved down the hall quickly, in the opposite direction of my room, and I realized that I had no idea where Evren’s rooms were. “He escaped my guards before they discovered who had done this, but I promise you, princess. I will find him.”

Every part of me believed him. He was infuriated that someone had done this to me, and I didn’t know if it was for my sake or the crown’s. But I knew that he wouldn’t stop until he had his dark fingers wrapped around the neck of whoever tried to hurt me.

We walked down a long hall at the opposite end of the palace, and I watched as black smoke dripped from Evren’s fingers and into the intricate lock that held his door. I had never seen anything like his magic.

I had never felt anything like him.

My mark sparked to life under his touch and near his magic, and I clung harder to him as his door clicked open. He pushed through his doorway without any hesitation, and I searched his room as he kicked the door closed behind us.

It was set up similarly to mine, although it was far larger, and it hit me how little belongings he had throughout the room. A dark shirt was slung over the single chair that sat in the corner, and his dark bedding was tousled as if he forbade the servants to come in and make it for him.

He sat me down on the edge of his bed, careful with how he laid my leg against the soft fabrics, and he stared down at me for a long moment before he pushed away from me and stalked into his washroom.

I gripped the bedding in my hands as I stared down at his dark shirt wrapped around my thigh. Pain still thrummed through me, but I felt so on edge being alone in Evren’s room that it distracted me from the discomfort.

He walked back toward me carrying a copper bowl that was steaming from the water inside and a stack of white fabrics. It felt like he barely noticed that I was currently sitting on his bed or the fact that my breath hitched in my throat, not from the pain but from the memory of his hands on my body as he kneeled in front of me.

He set the small basin at my feet before slowly untying his shirt from my leg. He didn’t say a word to me as he worked, but I didn’t need his words to know how angry he was. His normally controlled fingers shook with fury as he pulled the soiled fabric away from my skin.

He reached into my boot, surprising me when he quickly pulled my dagger from its home, and I didn’t stand a chance as he moved it out of my reach.

“That’s mine.” I winced as I tried to move for the only thing that still felt like home to me.

“Calm down, princess.” He pressed his hand against my chest and forced me back onto his bed before unsheathing my dagger and bringing it toward my leg.

I held my breath as he dipped his fingers into the tear in my trousers and pulled them away from my skin. Then my dagger followed. The metal grazed my skin just below my cut, and I didn’t look away from it as Evren used my father’s dagger to cut away my trousers from my leg.

“What you did tonight was reckless, Adara.”

“I know,” I hissed as the dagger tore through the fabric at my hip until my trousers were no longer held together on my left leg with a single thread.

Evren shook his head before setting my dagger next to me on the bed and sliding my boots from my feet. “Stand.” His voice was demanding and crass, and for a moment, I wanted to defy him. I wanted to make him finally look up at me like I was more than some sacred blood that had tried to run from his brother.

Instead, I stood on shaking legs in front of him. He stared straight ahead at the apex of my thighs, and even though I shouldn’t have noticed that look on his face when my leg was still aching in pain, it was impossible not to.

“Hold on to my shoulders.” He gripped the back of my thighs, and I did as he said. He slowly pulled what was left of my shredded trousers down my legs before helping me step out of them.

I sat back down on the bed in front of him once he threw my trousers behind him, and I watched as he silently dipped his dark fingers into the steaming water. He wrung out a cloth before looking up at me, and this time, I could see the pity that was hiding behind all his anger.

I swallowed hard as I looked away from him. His anger I could handle. “Fuck,” I cursed as he pressed the hot cloth against my cut. My hips jolted off the bed as my leg screamed in pain, but Evren pushed me back down as if I weighed nothing.

“I have to get it clean,” he growled at me before pulling away the dirty cloth and grabbing another from the water.

“I can do it myself. I want to go back to my room.”

Evren laughed before wringing out the cloth. “Are you going to stitch it yourself too? What are you going to say to Eletta when she sees it tomorrow or the queen when she accompanies you to your next fitting?”

“I’ll say I slipped,” I said the first thing that came to mind, and Evren’s gaze darkened.

“The queen isn’t a fool, princess. If she thought for a moment that you tried to run, she would do far worse to you than she ever did to…”

“My father?” I finished before he could.

He looked up at me again with that same pity in his eyes. “Your father or anyone else who dared betray her. You are everything she has been working toward, and she will not allow you to slip through her fingers.”

He pressed the next cloth against my cut, and this time, I bit down on my bottom lip to stop myself from crying out.

“I don’t want to be here.” I curled my hands into fists and pressed them into his mattress at my sides even as they itched to reach out for him.

“You don’t have a choice, princess.” Evren didn’t meet my eyes. Instead he was staring at my wound as he wiped the cloth against it and cleaned my tarnished skin. “I’m going to have to use magic to heal this.”

“What?” My voice shook, and I knew that he could hear the fear that dripped from it.

“My magic can heal this quickly.” He ran a finger along my inner thigh just below the cut, and I trembled. “Or I can use a needle and thread, but you’ll risk…”

“Just do it.” I clamped my eyes closed as his fingers pushed my legs farther apart.

“It won’t hurt, Adara.” His voice was soft and comforting, but I didn’t dare open my eyes as my mark began to thrum in a steady pulse. My eyes were closed, but I could still sense darkness around me, darkness that was unusual yet breathtaking.

The shadows wrapped around me like a caress, and I couldn’t differentiate what was Evren and what was his magic. But I knew that I didn’t want it to end.

The pain seeped from my leg as if he was taking it into himself, and I sighed as the last of it left my body.

His magic fell away from me slowly, as if it was as resistant to leave me as I felt about losing its touch. But as the last embrace fell away from my skin, I blinked my eyes open and watched as the black smoke that healed me seeped back into Evren’s fingers with a grimace on his face.

“Are you okay?” I unclenched my hands at my sides and pressed them into the soft fabric of his bedding.

“Don’t worry about me, princess.” He nodded toward my thigh. “Has that ever happened before?”

“No.” I shook my head. “No one has ever used magic on me before.”

“That’s not what I mean.” He lifted his hand and trailed it over where the cut had just been, and that was when I saw it. “Have you ever scarred like this before?”

I stared down at the starlight that shot across my thigh as if it were trying to hide my flawed skin. “No.” I swallowed hard as my fingers met his against my thigh. “Never.”

The starlight that marked my skin had been there since birth. Never before had a new mark shown up on my skin, even after all the injuries that had marred it.

And never had my star marks been shrouded in darkness like ink had been spilled on my thigh.

“You need to lie.” Evren’s fingers roamed over mine as he traced my new mark, and I felt it come alive under his touch as if it had been a part of me all along. “If Gavril or the queen sees this, you need to lie.”

“What do I say?” I searched his face, and I could see the hint of panic on his face.

“Whatever it takes.” His fingers contracted against my leg, and he lifted higher on his knees until his body was pressed fully between my thighs.

It fully hit me then that I was sitting on his bed in front of him in nothing but my undergarments and a shirt, and when his fingers tightened on my skin once more, I couldn’t bring myself to be worried about the queen or the crowned prince.

“They must never know that I used my magic on you.”

“What will they do if they find out?”

“I fear that neither one of us truly want to know the answer to that.” His fingers skated up my sides until they settled along my hips.

I widened my legs for him without thinking, and Evren took the opportunity to tug me closer to the edge of the bed and against him.

“And what if they find out about the way I’ve allowed you to touch me?”

My question brought a grin to Evren’s face, and he slowly lifted his hand and moved my hair over my shoulder before letting his fingers fall against my neck. “Are you going to let me touch you again?”

“No,” I said the word without any authority, and Evren knew it.

He grinned harder as his hand pressed against my neck and his fingers dug into the soft flesh of my hip.

“You say one thing, but your body says another.” He leaned forward and pressed his mouth against my jawline. It wasn’t quite a kiss, but like his lips were trying to discover who I was simply by the curve of my jaw. “You don’t need to be ashamed of wanting me.”

I swallowed hard as I took in his words. “A moment ago, you were ready to kill me.”

“I’m still ready to kill you, princess. You put yourself in real fucking danger tonight, and you could have been killed.” His hands tightened further as if he was trying to control himself. “But my anger with you does nothing to extinguish my want. If anything, I somehow want you even more now. I want to mark your beautiful skin with proof of my touch so everyone knows that you belong to me.”

“I don’t belong to—” My words were cut off as his teeth grazed over the sensitive skin of my neck. I inhaled deeply as I reached out and grasped onto his forearms for support. My chest heaved against his, and I could feel his heart racing.

“Don’t say shit like that to me tonight,” he growled. “It already took everything I had not to bend you over that throne and fuck you until no one was confused about the fact that you were mine. Not whoever tried to harm you, not the queen, and definitely not my fucking brother.”

It was on the tip of my tongue to remind him that his brother was exactly who I belonged to, but when I looked at how possessively he was looking at me, all I could do was attempt to press my thighs together as moisture gathered there.

“And now?” I asked hesitantly.

“And now I’m kneeling between your thighs that are marked with a mix of your magic and my own, and I am still desperate to mark you with my fingers just as harshly. But you already have enough to hide, princess.” His fingers tightened once more before he slowly stood before me.

I looked up, searching his face for what he would do next.

“You need to sleep.”

I looked down at my bare thighs before us. “Am I to head back to my room like this or are you going to allow me to borrow some of your royal trousers?”

He chuckled low and soft before reaching down and wrapping his arm around my middle. He pressed his knee into the bed between my thighs before his grip tightened, and he quickly lifted me and dragged me to the top of his bed along with him.

My head hit his pillow, and the scent of him overwhelmed me as if I was smelling it for the first time. Evren laid at my side with his head propped onto his hand, and he stared down at me for a long moment before pulling his bedding up over our bodies.

“Tonight, you sleep here. My guards will bring you clothes to change into, and we’ll get you back to your room before sunup.” He dropped down beside me, and I could feel his breath against my cheek.

“I should go back to my room tonight.”

“No.” He shook his head against me before lifting his fingers, and the light slowly drained from the room. “Tonight you stay with me.”

Evren wrapped his arm around my middle and tugged me into him until my back was pressed against his chest. The warmth of his bare chest seeped into me, and even though I knew I shouldn’t, I let a deep breath fall from my chest as I settled against him.

He pushed his knee forward between my thighs and ran his nose along the back of my neck as if he was breathing me in.

“Sleep, princess. Everything else can wait until morning.”

His request felt impossible, but as his warmth surrounded me, my eyes fluttered closed and I slept more deeply than I had since I had arrived in this kingdom.