33. Rule #33 Good People Can Make Stupid Mistakes

Rule #33: Good People Can Make Stupid Mistakes

Daniel

T he whiskey stopped burning my throat about twenty minutes ago. I'd also stopped pouring glasses, drinking straight from the bottle instead. I needed to stop feeling. The look of pain and betrayal on Zoe's face dug deep into my chest and ripped my soul into pieces.

This was the only way I could protect her. Not going after her was the hardest thing I had ever done in my life. Every muscle in my body had ached to chase her. To beg her to forgive me. But I was a fucking coward.

I had convinced myself that it was better this way. I could take her rage and her hatred, but her devastation was like a kick to the balls. I should have just fucking told her about this. But no, I thought hurting her would push her away. And if she stayed away, even though it killed me to lose her, it meant that she'd be safe. She'd be alive and out of my orbit of chaos and destruction. Except I was the one raining down destruction on her life. I was a bloody idiot .

I'd gotten a text the night before last, Benjamin had been outside her fucking house. He knew where she lived and reminded me what would happen if I didn't fall in line.

I lifted the bottle to my lips, taking another long drink. As soon as Zoe had left, I'd thrown Selena out. Physically. I didn't give a fuck about the old lady who gave me a filthy look when she landed on her knees and one of her red bottomed shoes went flying. Then I scrubbed and sanitized the hand that had touched her. But it did nothing to get rid of the slimy feeling that had coated my whole body.

The door to my office flew open, bouncing against the wall. I'd have to replace it soon if people kept abusing it. Lewis stormed in, slamming his hands on my desk and glaring at me with murder in his eyes. I was a werewolf, but Lewis was a finely honed weapon. He could do very serious damage considering the state I currently found myself in. And I would let him. It was the least I deserved.

"What the actual fuck?" he seethed. "You have five seconds to explain yourself before I rip your balls off and stuff them down your fucking throat!"

I stared at him with pain in my eyes, taking another sip before answering him. I was mildly impressed that I didn't slur my words.

"She killed Benjamin's son in the forest. I have to marry Selena and be his Beta Prime or he'll kill her as revenge."

"Fuck," Lewis swore, sinking down into one of the chairs in front of my desk. I handed him the bottle of whiskey and he took a deep drink.

"I can't… she can't… I just…" I stumbled over my words.

"Yeah," he agreed, then took another drink, looking at me with an assessing eye. "You look like shit."

I took in my appearance. I'd been in the same clothes since yesterday. My light gray pants were wrinkled and so was my shirt. My hair probably looked like a bird's nest with how I'd been pulling at it and I hadn't slept a wink. Although I might have passed out from the alcohol, but I couldn't be sure.

"Why didn't you tell us?" Lewis asked.

"Because they will kill her!" I yelled. "Did you not hear that part?"

"So instead you destroy her in the worst way possible?" he yelled back.

"She doesn't need me. She has you. She has Rory. The world needs her in it more than I need her."

"You broke her," he accused.

A spasm of pain punched through my chest.

"I know," I whispered. The guilt made me sick to my stomach. But I would do anything to protect her, even if that meant she would be hurt in the process. At least she'd be alive.

"That's not how this family works," he said, rising to his feet. "We work shit out together. You're not marrying that bitch. Let's go home."

Family. Is that what this was? I had no concept of family. Just a father who ignored us at best and was a tyrant at worst. A sister who was taken from me too early and a mother who I had never known.

"I can't, Lewis. I can't face her after what I've done."

"Well, put on your big boy pants. It's time to face the fucking music."

We pulled up to the Victorian manor twenty minutes later and I couldn't make my body move. I just sat there staring at it. I couldn't go inside. I couldn't face what I had done to her. Did that make me a coward? Probably. But Lewis appeared outside the window of the passenger side door giving me a look that said he wasn't letting me go.

My heart hammered in my chest and I drew a deep breath that did nothing to steady me.

With the patience of a fucking saint, he opened the door, looked down at me and said, "This is the first and last time I'm opening a car door for you. I don't even do that for the girls I date."

"You don't date," I said blandly .

"Exactly," he replied. "Get out. I've called a family meeting. They're waiting for us."

"Zoe knows I'm coming?" I asked, eyes going wide.

It was his turn to look nervous. "Um, no. She wouldn't have come downstairs if I said you were coming."

"She's going to murder you," I said.

"Both of us probably." Lewis scratched the back of his head nervously. "But I knew there was a valid reason for your behavior. She'll forgive you."

"I wouldn't forgive me," I muttered, following him up the short flight of stairs to the stained-glass front door. He placed a hand on my shoulder, looking me dead in the eye.

"I didn't say she would immediately. She has trust issues and not only did you not trust her with this information but you stabbed her in the heart. But you forget that I know her best. She's not irrational, well for the most part. She'll forgive you eventually."

Blood pounded in my ears. I was in no state to do this right now. At best drunk, at worst heartbroken. This was a bad fucking idea. I couldn't do this. But Lewis had opened the door and was dragging me into the living room.

"What the fuck is he doing here?" Lexi seethed, hovering above the couch. If looks could kill, I'd be six feet under. I'd never seen Lexi angry before, but this was the kind of loyalty that Zoe inspired. The loyalty that I had betrayed.

"Where's Rory?" Lewis asked. The blonde vamp was missing.

Lexi looked uncomfortable as she said, "She took off for a few days."

"What? Why?" Zoe asked, momentarily ignoring me.

"Dunno. She said something about needing some space," Lexi mumbled, not meeting Lewis's eyes. The girl couldn't tell a lie to save her life. I cringed at the thought but had enough self-preservation left not to voice it.

"Doesn't matter," Lewis said, standing in front of the TV, taking charge of the situation.

Zoe's eyes darted around the room, looking for an escape but the only way out was past me and she didn't look like she wanted to be anywhere near me.

"Hear him out," Lewis said. Zoe looked at him then. They had one of those silent conversations they were so good at before she hugged a pillow, burrowing further into the couch. Like if she could make herself small enough, she'd disappear. I hated that I was the one who had done that to her. I had taken her fire away. My strong, beautiful Zoe was an anxious shell. I had done that. And I didn't deserve her forgiveness. But she deserved this explanation.

Lexi took a protective seat next to Zoe, not cutting her glare.

"The wolf you shot in the forest was Jonathan. Benjamin's son and heir. He's demanding blood for blood. Either I marry Selena and become the Beta Prime or he'll kill you. I couldn't let that happen, Zo," I pleaded, willing her to look at me. After a long time, she looked up at me.

"I trusted you." Her words gutted me. "Do you have any idea what that did to me? What seeing you with her did to me?"

"Zoe, I'm sorry. I didn't–"

But she didn't let me finish. "No. I don't want to hear it. You did it knowing how it would destroy me. I gave you everything. We face things together. But you decided what was best for us, for me. Without trusting me with this."

She stood and I would have welcomed her fire, her rage, the gods knew I deserved it. What killed me was her sadness and disappointment. And as she walked past me and up the stairs, I realized that I might have just lost her for good.