Chapter 19

CHAPTER 19

T he Duke of Atherton stood at the bottom of the staircase — posture composed and as regal as ever.

Where is Harriet? He thought to himself. The duchess should have made her way downstairs by now. If she took any longer, they were going to be very late.

However, in the next moment, all thoughts would go flying out the window as he saw the duchess appear at the top of the staircase. As she began to descend its steps, Simon was left momentarily breathless.

She wore a gown of deep burgundy silk, the rich color enhancing the fairness of her skin and the dark sheen of her hair, which was styled in an elegant updo with a few loose curls framing her face.

The gown clung to her figure in a way that was both modest and alluring, emphasizing the curve of her waist and the delicate slope of her shoulders. As she moved, the light from the chandeliers played across the fabric, creating a shimmering effect that made her seem almost ethereal.

Simon had always known Harriet was beautiful, but tonight… well, it was as though she had transformed into a butterfly, fully bloomed into the young woman that she was.

When Harriet reached the bottom of the stairs, she caught his gaze, and the small, hesitant smile she offered him only served to intensify the strange, unfamiliar emotions swirling within him.

“Simon.”

“H..Harriet,” he stumbled on his words for a moment, before quickly clearing his throat. She looked even more stunning up close.

“I am sorry to keep you waiting.”

No need to be if this is what awaited me at the end of it. “Shall we go?” Simon pushed his intrusive thoughts away.

He had been prepared for this evening, or so he thought. The ball was nothing more than another societal obligation, a necessary appearance to maintain the status that his title demanded. But as they walked to the carriage, Simon found himself uncharacteristically tense.

“I was thinking…” Harriet broke the silence as the carriage begun to move. “There will be a lot of people in attendance today, and it is our first ball together.”

“You are correct.”

Simon felt it was wise to keep his responses brief. If he looked in her direction for too long, he risked saying something that would make an utter fool out of him.

“Well, a lot of people will be curious, will they not?” Harriet continued.

“I am sure that they will,” he responded, feeling Harriet growing more annoyed.

“I have a suggestion,” she said. “We should give them the impression that we are quite happy together. It would be good to stop any gossip.”

“Right,” Simon nodded, hesitantly. “How do you propose we do that?”

“Well, you can follow my lead. I will try and laugh at your jokes, and pass you loving gazes…”

The corners of Simon’s mouth twitched into a smile. “Loving gazes?”

“Well,” Harriet nodded. “No need to worry — I have been practicing in the mirror.”

Simon felt his curiosity pique. “Very well then. Let’s see one.”

As Harriet paused, Simon could see the surprise flicker in her eyes. He hadn’t really expected her to take his request seriously — he had been teasing, after all. But now, as he watched her compose herself, he felt a spark of anticipation. There was a playful challenge in the air between them, one that intrigued him more than he cared to admit.

When she finally lifted her gaze to meet his, Simon felt his breath catch in his throat. Harriet’s expression had shifted, her eyes softening as she looked up at him. She tilted her head slightly, her lashes fluttering in a way that was almost too perfect, and then her lips curved into a gentle, adoring smile. It was the kind of look that would make any man believe he was the center of her world.

Simon’s heart skipped a beat. He had expected to be amused, to perhaps share a lighthearted laugh with her, but what he hadn’t expected was the intensity of the moment. The teasing tone of their earlier conversation faded into the background as he found himself drawn into her gaze. There was something disarmingly genuine about the way she was looking at him, as if this was more than just a playful act.

Was it?

“How was that?” she inquired in the next moment, snapping him out of his happy little reverie.

“Uh..” Simon struggled, much to Harriet’s disappointment.

“I thought I had practiced enough. Heavens, I was hoping that it would wor?—”

“It was perfectly fine, Harriet,” Simon replied, cutting her off halfway.

He did not want to acknowledge just how effective it had been. But surely, if she looked at him like that, he would have no other choice but to melt.

They did not speak much for the remainder of the ride. Simon was too busy fighting the urge to sneak glances in her direction, and she seemed to be practicing her ‘loving gaze’ by herself.

But now, it was time to go inside.

As they made their way into the ballroom together, Simon was acutely aware of the glances and whispers that followed them. The ton had noticed their entrance, and the curiosity and speculation were palpable. But the opinions of society mattered little to Simon. What concerned him more was Harriet’s reaction to the attention.

To his surprise, she seemed more composed than he had anticipated, her posture perfect, her head held high.

He was about to comment on how well she was taking all the attention when Harriet gasped loudly — her attention drawn to the sight of her sisters, Esther and Frances, who were already mingling with the other guests.

“Oh, this is lovely,” she clapped her hands together in excitement, and quickly excused herself to join them, leaving Simon to follow at a short distance. He watched as she approached her sisters, noting the way her entire demeanor seemed to shift. With them, she was carefree, her laughter light and infectious as they embraced and exchanged greetings. It was as if the weight of the evening had lifted from her shoulders.

Could it be possible for her to be like that in front of him as well?

As Simon approached the trio, he greeted Harriet’s sisters with a polite nod. “Lady Esther, Lady Frances,” he said, his tone formal but not unfriendly. “It’s good to see you both.”

Esther smiled warmly at him, while Frances offered a more reserved but still polite response. “And you as well, Your Grace,” Esther replied. “I’m glad you could join us tonight.”

“Simon, I’d like to introduce you to Christopher and Phillip,” Harriet said, gesturing to two gentlemen who had joined them.

Christopher, tall and fair with an easy smile, and Phillip, slightly shorter but with sharp features, both bowed respectfully to Simon.

“It’s a pleasure to finally meet you,” Christopher said with a respectful nod.

“Likewise,” Phillip added, his tone more playful. “We have scarcely gotten a chance to do so. Harriet has told us about your busy schedule.”

Simon raised an eyebrow at that, but there was no malice in Phillip’s words, only a hint of mischief. Simon responded with a polite nod. “I’m sure she has,” he replied, his tone neutral.

Harriet laughed softly, the sound easing some of the tension in Simon’s chest. For a moment, he allowed himself to simply observe her, noting the way she seemed to come alive in the company of her sisters and their companions. It was a side of her he hadn’t seen often, and it made him wonder just how much of her true self she kept hidden when she was with him.

“I shall leave you to catch up,” Harriet said. “Come and find me please, when you are done.”

And then — she did it. She gave him that look again. The ‘look of love’. Simon felt himself unable to look away, feeling as though the moment felt too intimate to be shared in public.

She had finally figured out a way to disarm him.

And quite strongly, at that.

As Harriet left, Simon noticed the two men stare at each other and exchange a knowing glance.

Great. Simon thought to himself. Other people had begun to notice, too.

The rest of the night passed by in a flash. While Simon made sure to engage in conversation with different people around the room, he was never too far from Harriet.

It was a strange feeling — this — a weird possessiveness. There was no doubt that she looked ethereal tonight, and that many eyes were wandering over in her direction.

He wanted to remain close by — to fight off any problem that might spring up, or teach a lesson to anyone whose gaze lingered for longer than it ought to.

As the night passed, Simon noticed that Harriet had a change in her demeanor.

The light in her eyes dimmed slightly, and the carefree laughter that had filled the air moments ago faded. She grew quieter, her gaze frequently drifting toward the entrance of the ballroom as if she were searching for someone or something.

Simon’s brow furrowed as he watched her.

She looked… sad, almost.

Then, finally, not being able to take it, he marched up to her.

“Is something troubling you, Harriet?”

It’s nothing,” she said quickly, though her tone wasn’t entirely convincing. “I just…”

“It is clearly something,” he repeated. “Has someone said anything to you?”

“No, no,” she shook her head quickly. “It is more that.. Well, I keep thinking of Catherine.”

“Catherine? But she is safe at home.”

“I know,” Harriet sighed. “It’s just that I have never really left her on her own for this long before.”

Simon was silent for a moment. Firstly, he felt impressed.

How selfless can she be? Even in a crowded room, she is thinking of Catherine still.

And then, he felt a rush of affection. This time, he decided not to push it away as he usually did.

“Dance with me,” he said, offering his hand.

Harriet blinked, clearly taken aback by the unexpected request. “Dance?”

“Yes,” Simon said, his tone gentle but firm. “It will take your mind off things.”

For a moment, Harriet hesitated, as if unsure whether she should accept. But then, slowly, she placed her hand in his, allowing him to lead her to the dance floor.

As they moved into position, Simon felt the eyes of the ton on them once more. It didn’t matter. All that mattered was the woman in his arms, and the opportunity to provide her with some measure of comfort.

The music began, and they started to dance, moving in graceful tandem with the other couples on the floor.

“Allow yourself to be swayed by the music,” he instructed.

Harriet flushed, looking away. “I am trying as hard as I can.”

“No,” Simon shook his head, meeting her gaze once again and holding it. “Your body is too tense — too stiff. You need to let yourself feel the music, focus your attention on the moment.”

Harriet nodded, and Simon noticed her relaxing under his gentle hold on her.

“Much better.”

Simon was acutely aware of how close they were, of the warmth of her hand in his and the gentle sway of her body as they moved together.

He could feel her tension melt away.

For a while, they danced in silence, simply enjoying the moment. But as the music swelled, Simon found himself thinking back to the conversation he had overheard between Harriet and the nursemaid.

It had affected him more than he cared to admit. He felt that he owed her an explanation, even if it was difficult for him to talk about.

“Harriet,” he began in a low voice, “there’s something I need to tell you.”

“Right now?”

“Yes,” Simon nodded. No point beating around the bush, and now was as good as a moment as any.

Harriet nodded, and waited for him to speak again.

Simon hesitated, searching for the right words. “I know that I’ve been distant,” he said, his tone more serious now. “And I know that it has hurt you. I never meant for that to happen.”

Harriet’s gaze softened, but she remained silent, waiting for him to continue.

“In fact, it was not your fault either… it was just…” he sighed. “I suppose I am no better than anyone else. I am just a product of my own circumstances.”

Harriet blinked, once and then again. “Simon, I wish to understand what it is that you are saying to me. But you need to give me a little more than just that.”

Usually, Simon would have never indulged a request like that. But tonight — swaying in the middle of the dance floor, her looking as she did, the growing closeness between them — he would not refuse.

Simon took a deep breath, his thoughts turning to the past. “My father… he was not a good man, Harriet. He was a rake, a scoundrel who made my mother’s life miserable. I grew up watching him betray her over and over again, always chasing after his own desires, never caring about the pain he caused her.”

He said all of this in one breath. It was not rehearsed, but he could not afford to drag it out for long. Expelling the truth in this case felt like taking a thorn out of one’s skin — you never remove it slowly, only roughly and all at once.

Harriet’s eyes widened slightly at the admission, but she didn’t interrupt.

“I swore that I would never become like him,” Simon continued. “I promised myself that I would never hurt anyone the way he hurt my mother. But when I was forced into this marriage, I was afraid. I was afraid that I would end up like him, that I would destroy you the way he destroyed her.”

Harriet’s hand tightened in his, “Simon… I did not know…”