Chapter 41

CHAPTER 41

The day is a blur.

I'm a walking contradiction from the first moment we spoke with Conri to the late hours of the afternoon. On the outside, I am serene and wear a blissful expression. My voice is a level tone that verges on excited from time to time. I work to play it off as enthusiasm for what is to come for me in the night with Conri. This seems to please him, and he is all too eager to begin planning the bonfire as Aurora and I set out with a knight I barely recognized by face at first and now know as Farkolf.

Despite outward appearances, inside I'm all jitters and a stomach that is so tightly knotted that I have to force myself to eat for the sake of filling it as much as I can before we make our escape. My hands tremble from time to time as I gather things like thread and waterskins, all under the pretense of spell work for fertility. But everything I take is something that's going to make our journey easier.

We have the knight escort us back to the king's chambers as the sun begins to set. Conri is in the main hall, still arranging things for the bonfire. We pass by a mountainous stack of wood on the way in, arranged just outside the primary entrance to the great hall. It will no doubt be lit to coincide with the moon rising.

Farkolf takes his position where Evander would usually stand—right at the entrance to the king's chambers. But, unlike Evander, he keeps his back to us and remains at attention. He doesn't lean against the wall, arms folded. He doesn't angle himself inward, looking for me. The differences are a reminder that Evander isn't here with me.

Nasty thoughts drift through my mind of Conri having overheard us earlier. Of him knowing our plan and hunting Evander after he left. The images of the deep scars on Evander's back create strips of phantom pains between my shoulders. Evander could be dead on the ground, ripped apart by Conri, and I wouldn't know. I might never know. He?—

Aurora's hand closes around mine. We're in the bedchamber, sorting through our meager items by candlelight and repacking only what's absolutely necessary. I shift my attention to her.

"He'll be fine." She squeezes my fingers. "And so will we."

"I know," I say. Even though I don't know. None of us do. "I wish he was here, with us, though." I'd feel better if I could see him.

"Soon. Just like soon you'll be able to touch him."

"Touch who?" Conri asks as he slips under the curtain drawn across the entrance.

Aurora releases me and we both straighten from our sorting. Luckily, I had been shoving most things into packs on the floor. The one in front of me I nudge with my toe, trying to subtly push it under the bed. Aurora does the same with the pack she'd been filling as I step around her, my movement distracting the wolf king.

"You, of course!" I say with all the delight I can muster, practically throwing myself into his arms and kissing him on the mouth.

Conri chuckles as I draw away. His hands settle on my hips, toward the back, where they can reach for the curve of my rear. "I do appreciate the enthusiasm. Is it this fertility ritual already taking shape?"

"Perhaps." I look up at him through my lashes. "I am most excited to touch all of you tonight."

"Who says we must wait for tonight?" Conri leans in, nipping at my earlobe. "What's to stop me from just taking you now?"

"My king, the ritual isn't ready yet." I force a coy giggle, as though this is all a mere playful game.

"I can take you without need of siring a child now, and then again later." He leans back, looking down at me with a smirk.

"Should I clear off the bed?" Aurora asks dryly, as if she's seen this play out a hundred times. She probably has.

"Perhaps you should. I think I have a few spare minutes."

Disgust at the idea of Conri pulling me onto the bed wars with pity and sorrow for all the past women he's slept with if he thinks "a few spare minutes" is sufficient. I run my hands up his chest with a sultry smile, as if I'm deeply tempted by the idea. Conri's eyes shine in the low candlelight of the room, like a predator about to feast.

I open my mouth, about to offer my next excuse to stall him a little bit longer. But Farkolf pulls aside the curtain, dipping his head in with a small nod.

"My king, the patrol group has returned. Evander is here to report."

My heart skips at the news.

"Good, send him back." Conri has yet to release me.

"There's been a bit of a complication." That has the wolf king's attention. And mine. Farkolf continues, "He has another warrior bound and gagged."

"Part of the original group sent?" Conri is now giving Farkolf his undivided attention and I'm free to step away. "Or someone else?"

"I'm not sure, my king." Farkolf looks deeply uncomfortable. No doubt because he lacks the information Conri is looking for. "Perhaps it'd be best if?—"

Conri sighs before he can finish. The wolf king glances in my direction. "I never have a moment to indulge myself." He grabs my chin and holds my face in place as he brings his mouth to mine. "Keep that thought, my darling. Let it simmer until you're so hot you can't stand it. We will dance with magic tonight and I will make you mine."

"I am counting down the seconds," I whisper breathlessly.

Conri strides out of the room with a nod in Farkolf's direction; the knight follows. As the curtain falls back into place, my attention locks with Aurora's. We both stare at each other, holding our breath and straining our ears. The men's footsteps fade alongside their voices. Not much is said, and it's hard to make out anything past an initial "…yes, I'll go…" from Conri.

"What do you think?" I whisper to Aurora.

"Is Farkolf still there?" Aurora asks.

I shuffle to the curtain, pulling it aside ever so slightly. Farkolf is positioned back by the entry. I retreat into the room with a nod.

She curses under her breath. "I suppose Evander couldn't find an excuse to make him go, too."

What to do? I ask myself as I quickly round the bed and scoop my pack off the floor. There's no longer time to be judicious in determining what to bring and what not. Everything remaining gets shoved into the pack. Aurora follows my lead.

"We're going to head to the grove."

"All right." Aurora nods. Her implicit trust is apparent. It fills me with confidence as well as a deep sense of responsibility.

I grab her hand right before we leave through the curtain, stalling us one moment that we can't afford, but I need to take.

"I'm going to keep you safe," I vow. "And I'm going to take you to the sirens to have their old god restore your magic and free you of this halfway mortal coil. Nothing will stop me—not a wolf king, or spirit, or fate itself. I swear this to you."

Aurora squeezes my fingers and a surge of magic overtakes me, so much that the world briefly spins. Her brow relaxes and her head tilts slightly to the side. Her smile is one of relief.

"I believe you, Faelyn. You and Evander are the first mortals in a long time that I believed would look after me," she says softly. "Thank you."

"You have nothing to thank me for," I say. "This is long overdue."

"You have my gratitude anyway."

I release her and adjust the pack on my shoulder, hoping that it doesn't register as too suspicious to Farkolf. "Let's go."

We emerge into the central room and I try to set a leisurely pace. As though nothing is remotely out of the ordinary. Farkolf doesn't take notice of us until we're right at his side.

"Is everything all right?" I ask, curiously looking to the left and in the direction of the great cavern.

"Our king is handling it."

"Oh, good." I stop for a moment and clench my jaw to keep myself from asking about Evander. It'd be suspicious if I'm inquiring about him right before I go missing. "So there's no danger?"

"You're safe with me," he says dutifully.

"Exceptional." I turn to the right and start walking. Aurora follows. For a brief second, I don't think he's going to do or say anything at all. But Farkolf decides to be competent at the last second.

"Where do you think you're going?" Farkolf rushes after us, squeezing around our right and stopping in front of me.

"To the grove." I gesture ahead and furrow my brow. "Where else?"

"Are you supposed to be in the grove?" He steps in my way, again, as I try to pass.

I glare up at him.

Aurora answers before I can. "I am the spirit of the moon. Going to the grove to commune with my kin is essential. Especially before we perform any magic."

"Oh, right." He rubs the back of his neck. "Sorry, I'm not accustomed to this sort of thing. I'm usually relegated to menial tasks. But with Bardulf, well, gone…I thought it would be my chance to impress Conri. Maybe move up a bit in the pack."

Farkolf steps to the side and I start walking again. He falls into place at my side, where Conri usually is. I look at him for the first time and realize just how young he is. He can't be older than seventeen. The thick stubble on his chin disguises his youth at a glance. But the skin around his eyes is full. There are no sunken shadows. No lines that come with experience and time.

"I hope I've done all right by you both today. If I offended you just now, please let me know so I can properly make amends. I was probably a bit off-putting at first, wasn't I? Just nerves. I know you're probably more familiar with Evander, and Bardulf—though he's a poor example, I suppose. Given, well, you know… I promise I'm not like him." Farkolf had hardly said a word and now it seems he doesn't know the meaning of silence.

I come to a stop on the start of the path just outside of the caves. Columns arch around us, supporting the rock above. Moss climbs them and flowers and grasses hang from the ledge. Aurora slows to a stop two steps after, looking at me with a curious stare.

"Faelyn?" she asks.

Don't do this. I try and will myself to stop. It's not your concern. He's not your concern. He doesn't matter so just keep focused on what does and get yourself out of here.

But he's just a kid. An innocent bystander. And I am not Conri. I'm not heartless.

"Farkolf," I say sternly. The shift in my tone has him startling to attention. "I'm going to tell you something. I'll say it only once, and you only have a few seconds to make your choice."

"Faelyn," Aurora says more sternly, worry creeping around my name. I ignore it. Trust me , my heart wills her. Grandma always taught that I should trust my gut and use my powers to help this world.

Letting Farkolf get killed because of my plan helps nothing. I keep my eyes locked with his as I speak. My tone is as serious as the grave.

"If you make any motions to go back inside, I will summon a spirit and have the ground swallow you where you stand."

"Wh—What?" he stammers, taking a step back from me.

"I said don't move," I snap, holding out a hand. Farkolf ceases all movement. He has no idea that I cannot summon the spirits in this way. But none of them really comprehend how my relationship with the spirits does and does not work. So I keep the charade. "Here are your choices, Farkolf: You are either going to start running and leave Den as fast as you can. You won't look back and you won't be seen. You're going to leave the lands of the lykin for good—or at least until a new king wears the fang crown—and seek refuge with the elves, or fae, or even across the Fade, if you can make it.

"Or you're going to stand here and die," I finish simply, my gamble made. He's young, which means he's spent all his life under Conri's rule. But he's also young enough that he probably hasn't been a knight for very long. Perhaps he has yet to be fully brainwashed by Conri's efforts. Maybe he hasn't even taken the oaths yet that give him access to the charm, as I certainly haven't sensed any magic around him.

Farkolf opens and closes his mouth. His brow furrows, relaxes, and then furrows again. When Farkolf looks in Aurora's direction, she takes a step closer to me, as if to emphasize that this is her choice as well.

"Could I…simply stand here and say nothing?" he whispers meekly.

"We can't risk that." I glance over his shoulder, making sure there's no movement in the hall. "What's your choice?"

"I—I don't want to die." He really thinks me capable of killing him in cold blood like this. Ending Bardulf continues to yield unexpected benefits.

"Then you'd better get to running," I say, my hand almost trembling from the anxiousness I'm bottling. Farkolf goes to leave, but I stop him for one more remark. "No one can see you. No one can ever know."

"If anyone sees me again, I suspect I'm dead," he says softly. His gaze darts between us. "Though, I suspect if I stayed, I would've been anyway. One way or another."

I lower my hand and nod. Farkolf returns the gesture and then darts between the trees. He goes from man to wolf in an instant. Racing away. Consumed entirely by the thick, silvery trees of the grove.

"Was that wise?" Aurora asks uncertainly.

"I don't know," I admit. "But I know that it will be easier to live with myself—however much longer that is—knowing that I gave him a chance."

"How did you know he would listen?"

"I didn't. He seemed earnest, decent, and I hoped those traits would win out." I look at where Farkolf ran off. He headed north, into the cold and barren wastes past the edge of Den. Evander told me we couldn't go that way when we were making our plans in the grove because it was too harsh. But perhaps it'll be different for a lykin. I hope. But that's all the thoughts I can spare on Farkolf; the rest is up to him now. I turn to Aurora. "Are you ready?"

She looks once more into the dark hallway of Den, and then down to the grove.

"Aurora?" I probe gently. I can't rightly rush her when I also spent time on something for me.

"That was where Bewulf and I met," she whispers. There's a tiny smile on her face, but her eyes are filled with nearly overflowing sorrow. "It's where we wed and where I thought…" Aurora shakes her head and when she looks back to me, it's with a steely resolve. "I'm ready. Let's go."

I take her hand in mine and the two of us start between the trees. I set a swift but not careless pace as we run westward toward the great lake and the freedom and safety that lie far beyond.