Chapter Eighteen

E ach day passed by slower than the last. It frustrated Raine. The calendar read the ninth of November, but it felt more like January. She had too much time to think, which was the last thing she wanted to do. Her thoughts inevitably returned to Keaton, when all she wanted to do was forget him.

November had arrived amid her tears and the fall rain. Harvest and giving thanks signs, cornucopias, straw bales, and autumn-colored gourds replaced the jack-o'-lanterns, bats, spiders, and ghost décor, but she wanted to stop time so December never arrived. That was when he returned.

She better get over him quick.

At the back counter, she prepared sachets of her newest tea blend, Autumn Blessings. Even though she hadn't been scheduled to work today, she'd come in before the shop opened to play around with a new shipment of tea leaves that arrived yesterday in hopes she'd feel better. Finding the right mix of teas and spices kept her focused. Customers would love this.

Raine spooned the new blend into a sachet. "Last one."

Her job was done, but she didn't feel as good as she hoped.

Keep going.

She poured the remaining mix of tea leaves and spices into a jar and wrote the blend's name on it. Tomorrow, Robin could make a fancy label to replace the handwritten one.

It turned out Robin had an eye for design. She'd made the shop a new logo. The branding sheet included colors and fonts that Timmy used to overhaul the website for a class project. He'd added an online store. Raine had been meaning to do that, but she hadn't had the time. Now, Tea Leaves and Coffee Beans was completely branded. That made her happy.

She set down the items and wiped up the bits of mixture she'd spilled.

Yet, something was missing.

You're lonely.

The words echoed in Raine's head.

Callie had said it first, followed by Anna, Pippa, and finally Taryn. Even Timmy, Robin, Parker, Amanda, Jon, and their newest employee Siobhan kept asking if Raine felt okay.

Physically, Raine was fine. More staff meant more days off for her. She slept and ate three meals a day. But being at Tea Leaves and Coffee Beans was better than being at home where it was too quiet. Things weren't as chaotic at the shop, and she enjoyed the din of the customers and her staff chatting behind the counter.

She missed Keaton.

Her chest tightened as if a ton of coffee beans had been dumped on top of her. She wanted to force the memories away, but that didn't always work.

Raine had made her choice, and it was the right one. She hadn't wanted another long-distance relationship with a man who wanted different things than her.

Been there, done that, not about to try again.

Not because she didn't care for Keaton.

She did.

Raine had realized somewhere along the way she'd fallen in love with him. That was why she missed him and why the hurt was still so raw.

But he wanted a completely different life than her.

It would never work. She wouldn't want to even try.

She'd learned that with Emmett. When she'd tried with him, and kept on trying, she only ended up being hurt more.

Keaton had his dreams, and so did she.

That was life.

Lonely or not, Raine was living her dream. Mom and Dad would have wanted this for her. She kept telling herself that. One of these times, the words had to sink in, right?

And someday, she would meet a guy who wanted the same things as her. Anna was correct. A person couldn't force a relationship, and Raine wouldn't. Lesson learned, times two.

Whatever guy was out there for her, she only hoped he didn't show up soon. She needed to get over Keaton first.

The bell on the door jingled.

Margot sashayed inside with a magazine in hand and a big grin on her face. "You won't believe it!"

Raine wiped her hands. "What?"

"Our Boo Bash Scavenger Hunt was listed as one of the top-ten Halloween events in the state of Washington." Margot opened the magazine. "Look. We're number seven."

Raine scanned the article. The photos of kids wearing their costumes, making cards for residents of senior living centers, and stuffing one of the scarecrows brought a rush of memories of Keaton.

Margot smiled. "This is fabulous. Excellent publicity for Silver Falls."

Raine forced a smile. "It is."

"You should be proud of yourself."

"I am, but I didn't put on the event alone."

"No, you didn't." Margot waved the magazine in the air. "But don't let things not working out with Keaton ruin this accomplishment. I owe you an apology for interfering and trying to matchmake when you told me you weren't interested. But this article ranks up there with the kind of press the Christmas decorating contest gets. You should be celebrating. Not moping."

Am I moping? Raine hoped not.

"It is a big deal." She tried to sound enthusiastic, but she wasn't sure if she succeeded. "I hope it brings new visitors to town for the Harvest Festival. And now that we have a new policy on events for the association, no one will be saddled with an event the way I was."

That had been decided at the October meeting. And Pippa, the organizer of the Harvest Festival, was making it easy this year. Raine only had to put a few decorations in her front window and add another autumn drink to the menu temporarily. Speaking of which…

"I created a new tea blend. Would you like a sample on the house? You'll be the second taster after me."

Margot grinned. "I'd be delighted. I'll sit at a table where I can read the article again."

Margot meant she wanted to share it with every person who entered the coffee shop. "Enjoy yourself. I'll bring over the tea when it's ready."

Once, the tea had steeped long enough Raine delivered the cup to Margot. "I didn't add sugar because I wanted your opinion on the flavors alone. You can add some after the first sip."

Margot's blue eyes twinkled. She raised the cup to her mouth and blew. "Old habit of mine after I burned my tongue once."

She took a sip. Tilted her head. Closed her eyes.

Raine held her breath.

Margot took another sip and swallowed. "Simply divine. All the best things of autumn in this cup."

A thrill shot through Raine. "That's why I named it Autumn Blessings."

"Perfect name. You're a blessing to this town, Raine Hanover." Margot took another sip. "This is my new favorite of yours. I thought of your pumpkin spice drinks as the quintessential autumn taste, but this one puts the others to shame."

Raine wiggled her toes. "Thank you."

Margot took another sip. "Do you have the sachets for sale yet?"

"I do. I finished them before you arrived. I can bag them now."

"Perfect. I'll pay on my way out."

Raine headed behind the counter and prepared the tea for Margot.

The bell jingled.

Someone gasped.

Raine looked up to see Emmett.

He came up to the counter. "Hi, Raine."

She stared in disbelief. "What are you doing here?"

"Wanted a cup of my favorite coffee from my favorite barista."

His jeans and boots were the same, but he'd cut his hair and trimmed his beard, so it was more like scruff. He wore a maroon Henley with the sleeves pushed up on his forearms as if to show off his tattoos. "You haven't answered my calls or replied to my texts."

She waited for regret, attraction, something to hit.

Nothing did. "Been busy."

I'm over him for real.

That gave her hope she would be over Keaton soon.

Raine poured him a cup of coffee with a dash of almond milk and a splash of vanilla syrup. She handed it to him. "Here you go."

He took a sip. "My favorite. I've been to more than a dozen coffee shops, and nobody gets the ingredients right. They come close, but…thanks."

"Looking for another box?" Raine had no idea why he was here. She'd heard he'd been home to see family over Labor Day, but he hadn't stopped by. Not seeing each other had taken effort on his part. Which was why his visit surprised her. "I'm positive you got everything out of my garage in July."

He took another sip and smiled. "I'm not looking for another box."

His smile used to make her stomach flutter. It did nothing for her now.

Emmett stared at her through his thick eyelashes.

Oh, no. She recognized that look. He'd been able to get her to try long distance twice, to store his stuff from his apartment when his mom said no, but no way would Raine go there again.

Yes, Emmett was still handsome. That bad-boy vibe was as strong as ever, but he did absolutely nothing for her.

Zero.

Welcome relief poured through her.

Raine had to be careful what she said. She wasn't alone there. Whatever she said could be heard. Her and Emmett's discussion would go viral on the Silver Falls gossip network in minutes.

As he leaned toward her, he gave her his best you-know-you-want-me look. "Raine."

One word, but the way he said her name used to make her melt into a pile of goo. Only this time, it didn't. Her ego did a happy dance, but her heart…

Wanted Keaton, not Emmett.

She took a breath. Weighed her words once more. "There's nothing here for you."

Emmett's eyes widened. His face scrunched, and he drew back. "Are you sure?"

Raine understood the confusion in his voice. She'd never said no to him. Probably why she'd avoided his calls and texts. She'd cared for him and thought she would spend the rest of her life with him. But his actions, the way he'd flitted in and out of her life before dumping her for good, hadn't helped his cause. And he hadn't apologized for any of that, which told her he was still putting himself first.

Raine nodded.

He took a sip as if needing time to think. Then, that charming smile of his returned to his face, but once again, it didn't give her tingles or quicken her pulse.

"There used to be something here for me." He kept his voice light, almost playful as if he could convince her to change her mind the way he had in the past. "I thought there still was."

The ball was in Raine's court. She wasn't good at tennis, but all she had to do was lob it over the net. Too bad for him she was tired of playing.

Game over.

She didn't want to try again.

Nor would she apologize.

Emmett was the one who left, who kept saying he needed more than Silver Falls had to offer.

The same as Keaton.

A jagged pain sliced her heart. She raised her chin. "Not anymore."

Emmett's smile slipped from his face. His lips parted.

"All the positions are filled." Her tone was firm, not in a hurtful way, but Raine wasn't the same woman Emmett had known. "Besides I heard you're happy in Seattle."

"Yeah, about that." A contrite expression formed on his face. He shifted his weight between his feet. "Seattle isn't what I thought it would be."

"That's too bad." Raine kept her tone steady. She showed no emotion. Easy to do when she felt none. More proof she was over him.

Emmett's lower lip stuck out. "That's it? After all these years."

She wanted to remind him that he'd left her. But she didn't want to be petty. "You'll be fine."

Raine nearly laughed at his pout. How had she thought she was in love with him? That he was the one for her. He couldn't love her—or anyone—when all he thought about was himself.

"Look how quickly you moved on the last time," she reminded him. "Try Spokane. It's bigger than Silver Falls, but smaller than Seattle. And you get all four seasons like here."

Emmett stared at her. He opened his mouth, but no words came out. With his coffee cup in hand, he turned and left.

Raine held on to the counter and blew out a breath.

Timmy returned. Concern in his eyes and on his face. "Everything okay?"

It was, and she was grateful.

She smiled at him. "Everything's fine."

"And Emmett?"

"Gone." Raine still needed a minute. "I'm going to clear some tables."

As she walked to the sitting area, Margot stared at her.

Raine sighed. "Please don't start."

Margot threw her hands into the air. "Start what? I don't see anything here that needs fixing. You're where you're meant to be. Doing what you're meant to do."

Raine nodded. She was, but her life didn't feel complete. Someone was missing in her life. And she hated that.