Chapter 16

CHAPTER 16

Jett

Today has been brutal.

Physically, I'm fine.

But emotionally, I'm wrung out.

My brain and body won't agree on much, hence the tears that keep coming. It would be embarrassing if I didn't have the most amazing man at my side.

If I didn't have the most amazing Daddy there ever was.

As the evening wears on, my exhaustion returns. The lack of exercise and focus from practice leaves me wearier than I usually am. It's a strange feeling.

Daddy notices right away and lets our new group of friends know we're going to head out. They move around telling us goodbye and that they'll see us the next morning for breakfast.

It's nice, even though it does bring back that sense of overwhelm I felt earlier.

There's just so many of them.

And they're all so nice.

How am I supposed to cope with that?

My team is great. The guys are close to one another, and they understand me enough to let me do my own routines for game days. When it comes to calling plays, they also trust my mental processes to get the job done.

Even so, they're nothing like Princess Aster and his group. Their connection is soul deep. I can see it by looking at them. It reminds me of Bellamy and Aries. Sure, those two are tight with the team too, but their bond is on a brotherly level.

It's why they're so good on the field too. You can't break a connection like that with a few yards and some opposing linemen.

I bet we could blindfold Bellamy, and he'd still throw in the right direction.

The thought makes me laugh, which halts Daddy midway through his goodbye with one of the other Daddies. I shake my head at his raised brow, then focus on keeping myself upright.

I'm far too heavy for Daddy to carry me down the hall, and I'd be embarrassed beyond reason if one of the other Daddies (or several) had to help.

"Psst…"

The sound comes from behind me. I turn to see Ean standing there holding a gift bag.

"Hey," I say, unsure what's going on.

"Take this. Ask your Daddy to wear it to breakfast. Pleaseeeee." He squeezes his fists together.

I nod, then accept the bag discreetly. I'm more than big enough to keep it out of sight until we're in the room. Then I'll have to get creative to tuck it away somewhere.

Ean rushes away right as Daddy tells me we're clear to go. I follow him out of the train car back towards our room.

Inside the space, he immediately goes about setting up the bed. I toss the bag in the section where our suitcases are, then stand stock still to wait him out.

When he turns back to me, his face takes on an amused expression. At least, I think it's amusement.

Raised brow? Curl of the lips? Sparkle in the eye?

Yep, that's amusement alright.

"You were extra tired earlier. Do you have enough energy to shower tonight, or do you want to wait until morning?"

I wince at the thought of waiting, but I know there's no way I'd make it. The shower stall is just big enough for one person. Maybe if Daddy could fit too, then I'd be ok.

"Sleep, Daddy," I reply.

He smiles at me, then raises his hands. "Can I help you get ready? What does my boy want to do?"

There's another unsaid question: Do you want us to sleep together?

Before our nap earlier, I might have said no. But that was some of the best sleep I've ever had. Something about laying with him gave me enough peace of mind to shut my brain down completely.

I want it again.

"Together. Can we sleep like nap time?" The words are jumbled, only just making sense.

Still, Daddy smiles at me softly. "We can do whatever my sweet boy wants. Why don't you use the restroom first, then I can get you settled."

I do as he instructs, then return to the bedroom. He takes me in from head to toe, his smile near blinding. I don't know what it is about me that makes him happy. I only hope I can continue to keep him that way.

People tend to tire of me over time. I fear he might also fall victim to frustration when it comes to my… quirks, as my mother calls them.

"Sweet boy," he calls.

I focus back in on him, on the moment. "I'm here, Daddy."

He hums. "I don't think you were just a second ago, but I'm willing to let it go. For now. Let's get you ready."

Since we've done this once before, it's not surprising to see him climb on the bed to remove my shirt. He then takes off my pants and gets me settled in bed while he uses the restroom and strips down.

Watching his bare skin come into view sends fire through my veins. It pushes away the tiredness I'd felt, bringing forth desire — which isn't all that good at a time like this.

Daddy is about to get into bed with me. He's going to know something is up.

Not to brag, because really there's no point, but I'm larger than a lot of men. It's all thanks to genetics, though I know others don't take that into account. From my understanding, it can be either good or bad to be well endowed, depending on your partner's preference.

Since sexual arousal is a rarity for me (see also: once in a blue moon), I'm unsure what to do. Should I warn him? Do I hide it? Maybe I could just turn over and pretend I'm asleep until this damn thing goes down?

As I'm going through the answers, Daddy lifts the blanket and climbs in. "Come here, sweet boy."

I freeze.

There's no way to do what he wants without giving myself away. But I don't want to NOT go to him.

A whimper slips free at my internal battle.

Daddy's eyes go wide.

I'm equal parts embarrassed and shocked. I've never made a sound like that in my life.

"What's wrong?" he asks softly, his gaze locked on my every move.

Shaking my head, I force myself to say, "Nothing."

It comes out soft enough I worry he didn't hear me. Instead of taking me at my word, Daddy raises up to look down at me.

Then he shifts over closer in the bed. Panic sweeps through me. I know my face has to show my terror because the man across from me goes stone still.

"Do you want me to get out of the bed, Jett? If I'm making you uncomfortable, I can go."

His voice sounds broken, as if the notion isn't one he wants at all. I admit, I don't either.

I want Daddy here.

And I want to be his sweet boy, not Jett.

"You can't come closer," I tell him. "I want you to stay, just… not closer."

He nods, then lays down in the spot he'd shifted to. It puts him closer than he originally was, though not close enough to feel me. At least so long as I keep myself pressed against the wall.

Within minutes, I realize how inconvenient this entire situation is.

Not only will my erection refuse to go away, but neither Daddy nor I have managed to fall asleep. It's as if we both need to be close in order to feel the comfort we need for rest.

I held out for a few more minutes before breaking. "Daddy, are you still awake?"

We both know I can tell he is. The question is whether he'll entertain answering me.

He sighs. "I am, sweet boy. It's harder to go to sleep now than I thought it would be. Are you ok? Do you need something?"

"I want us to cuddle," I blurt out.

Turning on his side, he smiles at me. "I want that too. Did you change your mind from earlier?"

I shake my head, which, of course, confuses him. With a deep breath and a burst of bravery, I tell him the truth.

"I'm having a problem, and I didn't want you to know. It doesn't happen often. Really ever. But if we cuddled, then I'd have to… have to…"

His eyes move back and forth between mine, analyzing what I'm not saying. Instead of replying, he holds his arms out.

"Come here," he calls.

There's no part of me that wants to turn him away this time. Not even the piece of me that's bound to be mortified when he feels how hard I am.

At first, he doesn't notice. Or I assume he doesn't.

But as he tugs me closer, there's no missing my cock and how it's poking him. I bury my head against his chest, hoping with every ounce of me that my body will calm now that we're closer together. Maybe I simply needed some exposure to dull the hormones currently on overdrive in my system.

Daddy hums, his fingers stroking down my back as he waits me out. Eventually, I pull back enough to look up at him.

"I'm sorry."

He jerks at the apology. "What in the world are you sorry for, sweet boy? This is natural. Your body is responding to me, and personally, I think it's wonderful."

I shake my head. "It's not wonderful. How am I supposed to sleep like this? I couldn't even cuddle you at first, and it still won't go away!"

Daddy makes a noise in his throat; one I don't recognize. "I'm going to repeat myself, Jett."

Uh-oh. If I'm Jett, then I'm in trouble.

"There is nothing wrong with your body responding this way. I have a feeling you've found peace by letting me be your caregiver, is that right?"

I nod, the easy agreement obvious to me too.

"Then it's likely your body is going to do new things since it feels safe. Things you may have never experienced or maybe have only rarely experienced." The way he says the last part is more question than statement.

Burying my face in his neck, I admit the truth to him. The full truth.

"I don't usually feel sexual attraction to people. It's not… I'm not normal that way. Or in a lot of ways, really. The few times I've had to deal with this problem have been easy to correct. Well, all except for a couple, but those ended in sex and that took it away."

The man beneath me shakes with the force of his laughter. "You talk about it so clinically, sweet boy. Did you have bad experiences? Was the sex not satisfying?"

I shake my head, which caused my nose to brush against his skin. Taking in a deep breath of his scent, I allow myself to be even more vulnerable.

"Not really. They both came, which was good. And my body went down after dealing with them. If there's an urgent need, I've touched myself enough to alleviate the ache."

"Alleviate…" he says softly. "Sweet boy, have you ever had an orgasm?"

He sounds incredulous, like the thought that I might not have is baffling. I almost don't nod, but then I think about the honesty we promised each other.

Daddy pulls me back to look me in the eye. What I see there is a fierce look of determination. I recognize it from my teammates on game day.

"That's unacceptable. How could anyone who gets the honor of being with you not ensure your pleasure?"

I don't answer him. His question doesn't seem like one I can, or even should, answer.

"Sweet boy," he says with a firm tone, "would you — will you let me show you a better way to get your body calm rather than waiting it out? I can give you release that will likely help you sleep better as well."

While the idea is nice, I'm not sure if we should. He's already agreed to be my Daddy, which is a big commitment. Accepting that he has to teach me about pleasure and release feels even more significant.

Granted, I know the basics. I took biology like everyone else. I've also watched movies and heard the music my teammates love to listen to for warm-ups. While most are about women, it's my understanding that apart from anatomy, quite a bit of the process is similar when the partners are of the same sex.

"I'm not sure what to do for you," I admit. "What do you get in return, Daddy?"

The man in bed with me gives me a smile that sends shivers down my spine. Even my cock, which had been behaving well enough, bounces at the sight.

"You don't need to worry about me. I can take care of myself after. Maybe show you how I like it. For now, I want to take care of you. Need to show you that this beautiful body can feel really fucking good when treated right."

His hand comes up to my chest. I feel him stroking across my chest hair, then down toward my abs. They tighten on instinct as I start to feel lightheaded.

"What's your answer, sweet boy? I need to know if I have your permission to show you something new."

Channeling all the bravery I can, I tell him, "Yes, Daddy. Please help me."