23. Chapter 23

Chapter 23

Willow

My heart races, echoing in my chest, as I reach for Tripp's shirt and pull him into me. Closer. I need him closer. His stubble is rough on my chin and I kind of love it.

The canceled plans and the whole Bailey situation are in the back of my mind. I have no reason not to trust him, but it feels like I'm blindfolded while trying to walk a straight line.

Is this worth it? Putting myself out there for him? Tripp makes this sound while kissing me that snaps me back to the present. I feel guilty for letting my mind wander.

I think I owe it to myself to give him a chance. Give us a chance. Hell, if it doesn't work, put that in the pile of failed relationships. There's a corner of my chest that pricks and tingles. Doesn't feel quite right. It's the voice that whispers, Get out while you can , before asking, Why would Tripp stay when everyone else has left?

How many times can I put myself back together?

Thinking these things while wrapped up in Tripp feels wrong.

"Want to take the snacks out to the pool?" I ask, pulling away from him long enough to get the words out. I need to quit spiraling.

Tripp picks me up from the island, spinning me around, before he sets me down with a kiss on my forehead. It's like two of the cutest gestures I've ever dreamt of in the same three-second blur.

Instantly, I feel better. The pinch in my chest is almost gone. I grab my shirt, reluctantly putting it back on .

We walk out to the pool, which is one of my favorite parts of the house. Well, the whole patio. This was one of the first home renovation projects we dreamt up, my parents and I. I've always loved the water—pools, hot tubs, the ocean, you name it.

"Wow. It's beautiful out here," Tripp says, spinning around, taking in the details.

"Thanks. We re-did this whole backyard patio area when we bought it."

"Who is we?"

"I bought it, but I had no idea what I was doing. My parents helped."

I can still feel the excitement of planning this whole space. I was so conscious about spending money because I truly hadn't grasped what was happening with my career.

"I bought it the month I turned eighteen. I had signed my first record deal. Claire, my manager, had always encouraged me to find a place kind of conspicuous, and to do it early on. She gave me all these tricks for keeping it a secret and it's worked, so far."

"That's amazing. What was out here before you redid it?"

"Nothing. We planned everything… the pool, hot tub, sitting area, hammock, bar, fireplace, all of it."

This is something I'm proud of. With Tripp, I don't feel the need to play it down.

"How fun was it? Dreaming this up and bringing it to life." We sit down in the loveseat, near the fireplace, and set the snacks on the table in front of us.

"At first, not so much. I was ridiculously stressed about spending too much money. My parents finally convinced me to relax. I had no idea how much money I had since my mom and dad did all of the right things and kept it in several accounts until I was eighteen. We didn't have much growing up, and I wanted to scrounge and save every penny I made. "

I know I'm lucky. There are tons of tales of musicians, under eighteen, who didn't have cautious parents like mine.

"What was the first thing you bought? When you got your first check, or whatever the NFL gives you?" I ask because I have no clue how athletes and their salary work.

"Technically? A bouquet of lilacs. I walked to my favorite flower shop in town and then went to the bank to pay off my mom's mortgage."

"You had a favorite flower shop?" My heart is on the floor. In a puddle.

"Yes." His cheeks flush just enough to know this means something to him. "I went back home to tell my mom the house was completely paid off, and she needed to pick out a new place since I got drafted."

"And you just moved again, right?"

"I did. I decided to get a penthouse in the city. Didn't want to do a house. Not yet. My mom has a place five blocks from me."

"It's nice that you're close."

"It's always been the two of us."

Talking to Tripp is like wrapping yourself up in your favorite blanket—comfortable and warm. Obviously, the physical chemistry is there. I keep thinking about what it would be like to straddle him on this loveseat. Hold my body over top of his, creating friction where I need it.

This might be too easy considering I look at the clock and it's almost midnight. Tripp and I are still on the loveseat, long gone are the snacks. He sits with my feet in his lap, and we each have a blanket. It's still a relatively warm night for August; the blankets are just right.

"I had no idea it was so late," I say, looking at the time on my phone.

"What? How did that happen?" He looks flabbergasted as he runs a hand through his dark hair and grabs his phone out of his jogger pocket.

"Early morning tomorrow?"

"Yes, like five in the morning early. I've gotta get going. "

We reluctantly pull ourselves from the cozy loveseat, collect our snack remnants, and head inside. Once everything is put away, we walk to the door.

"Tonight was—"

"Please don't say nice," Tripp sighs for dramatic effect.

"Fun. I was going to say fun." I laugh and lightly nudge his shoulder. "Thank you for coming over. For being honest."

He responds by wrapping his arms around my waist, lightly touching my lower back. Tripp doesn't need to pull me in because I'm meeting him halfway with a kiss.

It feels like this is brand new and also like we've been doing it forever. He quickly learns what it takes for me to make the little noises he seems so eager for. I search for the ways to make him want to press into me further.

He bites my lip and then slowly pulls away. "Good, because I'm not that nice," he says before kissing my forehead one last time and reaching for the door handle.

"Text me when you get home, please."

"You got it, Lo. Goodnight."

I watch Tripp leave through the window.

I can't help but smile to myself. How can things change so much in a few short hours? Hours that flew like minutes, nonetheless? The doubt comes in waves, but I fight back with the feeling of his lips on mine.

I can't explain it, but I have a feeling things are going to get very interesting.