Chapter thirty

Poppy

My entire body relaxed as I stood back from the table. After working several long days decorating and sculpting, I’d pulled an all-nighter to finish the cookie bouquets. As the sun rose, I’d snuck into the studio to complete what I hoped would be the first model of the sculpture. I’d either be back at some point making a cast of the piece or leaving it, and Theo, behind.

I cried a ton while I sculpted the embracing figures because I knew Theo and I could have a beautiful life together. He just needed to see it as clearly as I did. When I began work on my shadow self, my thoughts focused on all my imperfections. But the longer I worked on the piece as a whole, the more I came to realize that I was enough, flaws and all. I didn’t need to be sweet like Rowan, or perky like Cammie, or citizen of the year like Lauren to deserve the love I wanted. Rowan had inspired Cal to leave his fuckboy lifestyle, but only after she’d ended their casual relationship when she wanted something more. To be with her, he’d had to work through all the reasons he’d been afraid to commit to someone.

I’d pressed every ounce of pain, hope, and love into the clay, adding more and more details because I wasn’t ready to leave. It’d taken hours of sculpting to finally accept Lauren’s advice. If Theo couldn’t heal himself enough to love me the way I wanted, I had to let him go. Because no matter how much I loved Theo or he loved me, only he could do the work he needed.

I’d sculpted without music since I didn’t want to wake him, but as the hours stretched into mid-morning, I started listening for him. Eventually, I heard the thud of boots and the front door close with a finality that made my heart ache. Afterwards, I’d blasted my music and kept working long after I initially thought the piece was complete. Each detail felt like a piece of us I was letting go: Art discussions and shared sushi, my sassy mouth and his kind eyes, our friendship and our passion. The sun had already begun to sink behind the mountains when I finally put down my chisel.

“That’s incredible,”

Mom said, making me jump a foot. The music was so loud I hadn’t heard her come through the slider. I turned off my speaker while she leaned close to the sculpture, her nose almost touching the clay.

“What are you doing here?”

I asked. “The shop must be slammed.”

Mom waved me off like it was any other day and not the evening before the second-busiest day of the year for florists. Only Mother’s Day surpassed the chaos of the next twenty-four hours at Red Blossoms. “I’m here to help. I see you’re all packed up.”

“Yeah,”

I said, glancing at the boxes of art supplies. I’d packed in fits and spurts whenever I needed a break from sculpting, leaving only a handful of tools on the table.

“This is the best work you’ve ever done,”

she said giving my shoulders a squeeze.

Whatever happened, I felt a surge of pride while I studied the piece from all angles. No question, it was my best. I’d hacked the shadow figures into pieces then replicated the lines on the entwined figures in the middle, making sure any missing parts that remained were in places where Theo’s figure and mine entwined. It was a little Jerry McGuire “you complete me,”

but it was the truth. Plus, I’d left it up for interpretation if we filled each other’s gaps or simply shielded them from the rest of the world.

“Wow,”

Chris said, running into the room through the open slider. “That looks great, but I have a paper to finish, so can we move this along?”

“I didn’t ask either of you to help me.”

“No,”

Chris said, stacking two boxes and lifting them. “But we figured you didn’t want to move out while Theo was here, and it’s getting late.”

He took off without another word, almost running into Lauren.

“I’m here,”

she said, breathing hard like she’d sprinted all the way from Karma. “I have ten minutes, so load me up.”

“How did you even know to be here?”

I asked as Mom shoved a bucket of clay toward Lauren.

“You told Rowan you were moving out when you used Cal’s bathroom, and she’s finally realized she’s not helping anyone by stressing her back,”

Lauren said, grabbing the bucket and a stack of drop clothes.

I’d told my sister to keep me accountable, but I didn’t expect her to call in reinforcements to help me move.

“Thank goodness she’s being sensible,”

Mom said, grabbing another box, leaving only my tool chest and portable speaker. “Especially this close to the wedding.”

“Thanks for the help but get back to whatever you need to do. I can get the rest,”

I said as I wrapped the last of my tools and placed them in the chest.

After Lauren and Mom took off, I opened the kitchen door, placed my key by the uncovered statue, and left, taking everything but my heart with me.