Chapter 2

Chapter Two

How many wayscan one Willow Ashford be pathetic? Let me count the ways.

Could it be the way I showed up to work my first day on the job, in a full suit, ready to kick ass, only to find out that the dress code was far more lax than anyone had told me? I’d had to go through my whole day, meeting all of my superiors, looking like a pretentious idiot.

Or perhaps it was when, after warming up my food on my third day on the job, I tripped on my own heels, sending my Pad Thai sailing through the sky and all over the carpet. Bad enough that the entire staff in the bullpen saw the entire fiasco, but the room of a dozen investors saw every humiliating second through the full glass windows as well.

Not enough?

Well then, surely it was on my fifth day at the company, when I had been horribly late to work because half-way into my thirty-minute drive, I realized I forgot my security badge to get into the building. Class act there, Willow. Class act.

Honesty, the thing that made me truly, completely pathetic, was the fact that it had been two weeks since I had gone to Club Obsidian, and I had yet to take one step back in that place. No matter how desperately I wanted to.

That would change tonight. My bag was packed, and I was going to do this. I still wasn’t strong enough to wear my little gear out in public, but tonight I would at least go into the little room. And if it went well, I’d slip into the bathroom to change clothes. I’d like to say I had grown in the five years since I had discovered kink, discovered my little side. But in truth, I was that same scared girl I’d been years ago, walking into my first club. That had gone well; why wouldn’t this?

For a moment, I let the pang of loss sting within my chest at the memory of the home I’d left in Denver. It wasn’t just the amazing team I’d had at work, or the friends I had made — it was losing the community of littles that had become like a second family to me. Granted, one nasty breakup from my first ever Daddy had made the move back to Providence just a bit easier. To say that Thomas hadn’t exactly been gracious when I had called our relationship quits would be putting it lightly.

All of that was behind me now. Now, I was ready to start fresh in this new life. Even if I was stumbling my way through it.

You can do this,Willow. Just put one foot in front of the other.

Standing outside of the playroom at Club Obsidian, nerves slithering around my belly like a nest of snakes, I just couldn’t bring myself to take the plunge. The only way I would ever get past this crippling anxiety and insecurity was to go inside that room and immerse myself in a new community. Hopefully, I’d find a new home there.

Reaching inside my bag, I let the soft faux fur of Mr. Fluffers soothe me. I just needed to pull the trigger.

Just do it, Willow.

Just do —

“Glad to see we didn’t scare you off.”

Frozen in place, the same voice that had spun comfort and desire within me two weeks ago sounded from behind me. The déjà vu was tangible, like a hand squeezing my throat shut.

He was here.

Again.

And he was standing behind me.

Again.

In front of the littles room.

Again.

And all I wanted —

“So, did you decide to go on in? Or still not quite ready?” His words held no judgment, only interest. Though, why he was interested in me or my plight escaped me.

“Oh, I don’t know. Just kind of getting my feet wet, you know?” I shrugged, turning to face him.

“I know you don’t know me, but it seems to me like you’ve got some shaky nerves, or perhaps are a little afraid to go in. Or perhaps I’m mistaken?” My eyes found his, all dark and sexy, peering down at me from his tall frame.

“It’s just… a new place. I don’t know.” My hand gripped Mr. Fluffers deep inside my bag like a lifeline. This man made me nervous, but not in a way that frightened me.

“Well, would it make you more comfortable to not go in alone? I know you don’t know me or anything, but I’d be happy to accompany you.” His gentle smile was nearly my undoing; a blush spread over my cheeks like wildfire.

“I couldn’t ask you to do that. I’m sure you have plans, and a submissive to go attend to.” Nervously brushing a lock of my hair back behind my ear, my eyes lowered. I was making a fool of myself, but it was nearly impossible to not want to be little in his presence. He loomed over me, easily over six feet tall, with broad shoulders — perfect for cuddling. And that smile — that smile —equal parts disarming and charming, giving me the feeling of comfort and protection and something delectably dirty all in one tiny smirk. How was I supposed to act?

“No submissive for me at this time, sugar. But I’d be happy to go in with you. If it would make you feel more comfortable, that is.” I weighed my options carefully. On the one hand, he was Alyssa’s father. And that felt — weird. Kind of. Maybe? I wasn’t entirely sure. On the other hand, I had stood outside of this door twice now without taking the plunge and getting involved. Perhaps he was right. Besides, it wasn’t like he recognized me, anyway. Surely, I could go in, maybe make some new friends, and he would go back on his merry little way. I doubted very much that this was his scene, anyway.

“Alright,” I shrugged and offered him a smile. “Why not?”

Holding his elbow out to me, he escorted me inside the playroom. Immediately, I could feel dozens of pairs of eyes on me, on us. He led me to an area of sofas and chairs. On the floor were a few tubs of toys; my eyes immediately went to the Legos. Most of the others were playing in other areas, with only one couple sitting here. A man sat on a chair, brushing his little boy’s hair. It was sweet. I longed to feel such a tender touch on my own long locks.

I nodded, not trusting my own voice. “How does this spot feel?” Mr. Stone asked me. He made space beside him on the large sofa, but I did not miss the way his legs spread, making space for me to sit on the floor below him, should I wish to. It was completely unassuming and non-pressuring; the absolute perfect way to give me a choice.

Thinking better of sitting in such an intimate place as between his thighs, I sat on the couch beside him, pulling my legs up and tucking them beneath me. I longed to pull Mr. Fluffers out of my bag, but thought better of it.

Baby steps, Willow. Baby steps.

“So are you new to the area, or new to the community altogether?” he asked, shifting to better face me.

“Neither, well, not exactly. I moved back here recently.” Pressing my lips together tightly, I stopped myself from saying too much. His easy demeanor made it difficult not to say too much. “But I’m not new to the scene, just this particular community.”

“So not a newbie, just new to the Providence scene.” He nodded in understanding, his arm stretching across the back of the sofa. I could almost feel his fingers against my skin; even though they weren’t touching me, only the back of the sofa.

“Hell, where are my manners?” He swore softly under his breath. “I didn’t even think to ask your name, or introduce myself, for that matter. I’m Adam.” He gestured lightly with his free hand towards me.

“I’m —” I stopped abruptly, realizing that I couldn’t give my real name. So many in the kink community used fake names, but I had never thought to. I had always used Willow. But there was no way I could say that here, not to him. In my discomfort, I had shoved my hand back into my large bag, feeling Mr. Fluffers for comfort. “You can… um… you can call me…” I trailed off, searching my now blank mind for any kind of name that would suffice. My fingers pet over Mr. Fluffers, and it came to me. “You can call me Bunny.”

His face lit up; his eyes sparkling.

“Bunny. I like that. It seems to fit you.”

“You don’t even know me.”

“Don’t I, though?” His fingers lifted from the back of the couch, touching my cheek lightly, just where a cursed blush heated my skin.

“I… um…” My eyes lowered almost automatically, but not before I saw the way his eyes moved down over my body, just for a moment. My submission answered his dominance with far too much ease.

“I’d like to ask you a question, Bunny, but it’s a personal one. Would that be alright?” His tone was soft and sweet, the perfect tone for a Daddy to have. If only he were a Daddy. The look of him spoke far more of a sadist than a Daddy, however.

“Alright.” My fingers lifting to tuck an errant lock of hair back behind my ear nervously. The long, strawberry blond locks were wavy with far too much unruliness, but he stopped me with a gentle touch on the hand before tucking the troublesome lock behind my ear himself.

“What makes you nervous about joining in the little scene here in Providence? Was that the scene you were in before? Wherever you were before?”

I struggled to answer. It was not a simple question to answer.

“What is in your bag there, Bunny?” he asked, his hand touching my bag where my hand lay inside, playing with Mr. Fluffers.

“Oh, um…” Scrunching my nose in embarrassment, I pulled Mr. Fluffers from my bag, holding him in my lap, though all I really wanted to do was pull him to my chest and snuggle him.

“Well, who do we have here?” Adam’s entire demeanor changed. Sitting up, he looked at my stuffy with rapt fascination and excitement, his smile drawing an answering grin from my lips, putting me at ease.

“This is Mr. Fluffers!” I answered with a slight bounce on the sofa, unable to hold back my excitement.

“It’s nice to meet you, Mr. Fluffers.” To my utter shock, Adam held his hand out to the bunny, as though shaking the hand of a stuffy was a normal, everyday occurrence.

Was Adam a Daddy? Had I been wrong about my assumption completely? Surely not.

Hesitantly, I held out Mr. Fluffers’ paw for him to shake, giggling when Adam made a show of it. We settled back into the sofa, a little more comfortable than we had been five minutes ago.

“I think…” I searched for the right words. “I think that I’m just afraid of not fitting in.”

“Not fitting in? Why would you ever think you wouldn’t fit in?” His brow furrowed in concern.

“It’s been a thing most of my life — not fitting in.” I shrugged, my eyes lowering.

“Hey.” His voice, quiet yet firm, pulled my attention as his fingers touched my chin, lifting my eyes to his. “First and foremost, this community is built on trust and acceptance. I can tell you that for certain. Second, you should never have a reason to feel you do not fit in. You are perfect just as you are.” His eyes darkened, narrowing slightly in a way that made me gasp. “And anyone who tells you otherwise? Well, you just send them to me, and I will deal with them.” There was an edge of darkness to his voice, something that made a shiver of fear and delight run through me.

I barely managed to nod.

“Hewwo,” a small, timid voice called from beside me.

“Good job, Brody!” The man sitting above him whispered just loud enough for me to hear. Nerves clutched me, but Adam’s hand touched my shoulder, squeezing in encouragement.

I could only manage a wave at the boy, but it was a start.

A very good start.

“Go make a new friend, Bunny,” Adam whispered. “I need to attend to something, but if you need me, just find a Dungeon Monitor and tell them you are looking for Adam. They will know how to find me. The Monitors all wear those vests, you see?” He pointed out a Dungeon Monitor in the far corner, wearing one of those bright green and orange vests like a construction worker.

“Okay,” I replied softly, nodding. He urged me with a hand on my back to go talk to the boy.

“Want to play Legos with me?” I asked, biting the bullet and putting myself out there. Brody quickly looked up to his Daddy, who nodded. The blocks were quickly spread across the floor for us to play with.

My eyes looked up with a smile, searching for Adam. He stood in the doorway, a smile on his handsome face as he gave me two thumbs up.

I decided to pretend that his approval did not have my thighs clenching in desire.

No, that certainly wasn’t what happened.

Not at all.