8. Vivi

eight

vivi

My mind was racing a million miles an hour, but when I heard his voice and felt his hand on my thigh when he started the car, everything inside me went quiet.

I'd heard once that if you were ever kidnapped, you should try to catalog anything and everything you could about the drive. Turns, sounds, train tracks.

But I didn't.

My mind was quiet. Blank almost.

Only Nix was in my head.

Nix.

Nix had come by and literally swept me off my feet.

By kidnapping you! the sane part of me tried to argue, but the complaints were halfhearted at best. And why did I keep picturing him as the detective that had been in the last break room? All tall, dark, and handsome with beautiful fathomless eyes the color of deep moss?

"Nix," I said out loud the moment the car stopped. And even though he didn't say anything, I could feel him watching me as the loud sound of what I assumed was a garage opening rang through the car. "Nix, please let me go. I won't tell anyone. I don't even know what you look like."

"Yes, you do," he whispered, and the car moved again. Before I could his words, the driver's side door opened and shut. Then mine opened. I wasn't able to make a sound with the way my heart was suddenly racing in my chest.

I'd been kidnapped. I'd been kidnapped by the man I had been talking to. I'd all but told him everywhere I went. I'd trusted him. I'd fallen for him, and he'd taken me in the middle of the night in an alley.

And he'd said I knew what he looked like!

I felt him lean over toward me, and when I breathed him in, that soft familiar scent I'd been smelling filled my lungs.

Woodsy. Citrusy. Musky. Completely masculine.

"It's been you," I whispered with my eyes shut even though the blindfold was still in place. His movements stilled, and his hands at my hips froze. How could I have been so stupid? Why hadn't I trusted my gut? He's been following me . A shiver ran down my spine. He's been in my apartment.

"What did you say?"

"It's been you," I repeated a little louder. My voice still shook, but it grew stronger with every syllable. "It's been you. You've been inside my apartment," I accused .

"I have," he whispered what felt like right in front of me. If I moved a smidge forward, I had a feeling I'd feel his lips against mine. And despite the craziness of the situation, I really wanted to do just that.

Was I sick in the head?

Was this Stockholm syndrome.

No! It was just me. Me and my dirty fantasies swirling in and out of my head.

"I'm not going to hurt you," he promised, and before I could open my mouth to scream, he pulled me out of the car and over his shoulder. Carrying me where, I had no idea.

"Help!" I shouted. "Help! Someone! Help! Please!" His hand smacked my ass, and I squeaked at how much I liked it.

"There is no one for miles, kitten," he shared. "So, if you wanna scream, go for it." I opened and shut my mouth. There was no way of knowing if he was being honest or not. But I stayed quiet. I needed to save my energy. Be smart! a voice whispered in the back of my head. He walked through wherever the hell we were and carried me like I weighed nothing more than a sack of potatoes.

And I realized a lot about myself in that moment.

I knew if I had ever found myself with anyone else in this situation, I would have been freaked out, fighting and biting and yelling until I couldn't stop. But I wasn't in this situation with just anyone.

It was Nix.

"What's your name?"

"Nix," he shared, and I frowned .

"Your whole name," I clipped with sass I didn't know I still had inside of me.

"Later." His hand squeezed my bottom, and even though it felt like all the blood in my body was rushing to my head since I was tossed over his shoulder in a fireman carry, my sex clenched.

It almost pulsed.

I was turned on.

I had no idea what this man looked like, or his full legal name, but I knew a couple of things.

I was safe.

There was no way Nix would ever hurt me.

And I had a feeling whatever he had planned, I'd like it. A lot.

He stopped, and I when I breathed, his scent was strong inside wherever we were. Carefully and with the gentlest touch, he set me down. His arms wrapped around me, almost like he was worried I would run. I could have easily lifted my knee and hit him where it hurt. I knew it like I knew my name, and I had a feeling he did, too. Even so, he didn't move, and I didn't knee him.

"You scared?" he asked. His lips brushed the side of my face, and I heard his sharp intake of air. Could he feel the way my body seemed to vibrate for him?

"Honestly?" I licked my lips when he grunted. "I'm not really sure."

"Yes, you are," he growled. "Tell me," he demanded.

"I'm not," I admitted. "I mean… I don't like not knowing where I am or what you look like but…"

"But? "

"You won't hurt me," I answered confidently. Maybe it was stupid of me, na?ve. But I really didn't think he would.

"You sound pretty sure of that," he whispered. My skin rose with goose bumps. "I like that," he admitted, and I relaxed, almost leaned into his body. Quickly, I processed just how big he was. Tall. Strong. Warm.

"You're shivering," he pointed out.

"It's a little chilly and"—I swallowed hard—"this overall feels scratchy."

"Hmm…" He took a step back. Cool air flowed between us. "You look cute in this getup. Maybe one day, I'll have you wear it for me again."

"Why?"

"So, I can rip it off your sexy-as-sin body." My thighs clenched on their own accord, and my chest rose heavily.

"Nix…"

"Like a savage animal, only to find you not wearing anything below. That was one of your dirty little fantasies, wasn't it?" I gasped, and my thighs pressed together. The sound of his deep chuckles made me feel hot and cold all over.

We'd stayed up late a lot of nights. Sharing our darkest, dirtiest fantasies. He'd been great at coaxing them out of me.

"Shh… you're thinking too hard."

"Nix—"

"You're right, you know?" His big, warm hands moved to the metal button at my collar. One by one, he popped them off. "I won't hurt you. Not in any way you won't like. I promise." The ties on my hands loosened, but I just stood there.

I didn't try to rip the blindfold off.

I didn't do anything but stand in from of him. Yearning for him to be the one to take the mask off to reveal himself.

"Nix, please… let me see you."

"You know what I look like, kitten," he oddly confirmed. My brows pulled together. I know what he looks like? The pulse point at my neck picked up speed as I breathed in deeper. Inhaling his scent. The scent I was almost sure had been in the break room when that detective walked in.

"Nix." My chest heaved and my hands shook, but I couldn't get them to move.

Was it him? Was Nix the detective I'd been pining for from afar? I wasn't sure, and for some reason, I couldn't get myself to ask.

Nix' hands rounded my shoulders and pulled the overall off slowly, peeling it from my body. Then they moved down to lift one leg and then the other, leaving soft trails of heat against my skin. When the ugly, shapeless uniform was gone, I was left in nothing but a tiny red camisole and black biker shorts I'd worn under my office clothes to make it easier to get dressed in a small bathroom at a mom and pop coffee shop before I got to the bus. I hadn't had time to go home since I was cleaning the police station on my own.

"Look at you." Appreciation dripped from his voice, and it made me feel… pretty. Sexy. The deep intake of breath made me very aware of just how close he was, of how much of me he was lo oking at. And I shocked myself by not trying to hide from what felt like his scrutinizing gaze.

In that moment, any insecurities I'd ever had about my body no longer existed. I wasn't scared or worried. I wasn't sure if that was because I knew him on a different level after all our phone calls or because I could hide behind a blindfold and not really know who I was standing in front of half-naked.

Or maybe it was my soul recognizing my other half?

One as twisted and dark as I was, and we clicked perfectly in place.

"You're even prettier than I imagined," he confessed. My face felt hot.

"Nix—"

"You took my breath away when I first laid eyes on you. Did you know that, kitten?

"I, umm…"

"You stirred something inside of me," he whispered what felt like a hairsbreadth away from my lips.

His big, calloused hand moved up my waist, and I didn't squirm as it explored. I didn't even giggle when it tickled. I stood still when his hand cupped the side of my face.

"It came to life, and every little thing I learned about you only made it hungrier for you," he kept sharing as I leaned into his caress. His thumb skimmed the apple of my cheek, and my eyes shut behind the blindfold, letting all my senses soak in everything they could. "That's the same white bow you were wearing, and that night, I got home and pictured peeling this overall off your body right here."

"You did?" There was no hiding the hope in my voice. Or the pleasure it brought to me that Nix was sharing even more about himself. He grunted, and the sound only added to the warm pulsing between my legs.

"It's why I texted you." He'd found my number? "Fuck, I just wanted to hear your voice."

"But you texted." He wanted to hear my voice? My observation made him laugh, and the manly sound surrounded me like a warm blanket.

"No one ever answers their phone to unknown numbers nowadays." He wasn't wrong. "I had to make sure to get your attention. Earn your trust."

"Earn my trust."" He had done that. God, I wasn't sure how I hadn't realized that. He might not have made a date for us to meet, but I had been telling him exactly where I would be every night since we'd started to talk.

Not to mention I'd told him all about my fantasies.

Before I knew it, the overall was completely off and he'd tossed it behind me. "Is that better?" His touch was soft. "Less scratchy?" he asked with concern, and I nodded.

"Yes, thank you." My thighs pressed together, and my nipples stood at attention against the flimsy sheer unlined bra I'd worn to be a little more comfortable.

"You're shaking."

"I'm just… I'm nervous." I laughed awkwardly. Nervous was an understatement.

"Why? It's just me." My lips twitched at his simple answer. Just him? He might have gone through whatever lengths he'd had to, to get my phone number, but didn't he know how he plagued my thoughts? How I had been wondering what he looked like, how much I wanted to meet him?

Yes.

He knew. There was no way he didn't. He knew and planned all this out for me.

Planned to sweep me up, take me in the middle of the night somewhere so we could finally be together. All to make my fantasy come true.

"I want to see you. Please, Nix."

"Nixon," he corrected, and I swallowed.

"Nixon?" I repeated. "Is that your first or?—"

"Nixon Hayes," he shared. I repeated his full name, liking the way it rolled off my tongue. "You still cold, kitten?" The concern was clear in his voice while his hands stroked my bare arms.

"A little," I answered and then shook my head. "No, yes, I'm not really sure." I couldn't stop the trembling of my body, so he took matters into his own hands.

Nixon picked me up and sat us down on what I assumed was a bed.

"Here, cuddle in close."

"Are you… snuggling me?"

"Maybe. Do you mind?" I shook my head. I leaned in and rested my head on his shoulder. " You haven't taken your blindfold off," he noted. "You're not tied up anymore. There is nothing stopping you from?—"

"You put it on me," I cut him off, and I could feel him watching me. His hands never stopped stroking my arms, and before I know it, he covered us with a comforter. It brought the notes of his cologne or body wash closer. And for some crazy reason, I had never felt safer.

"You want me to take it off you?" I melted into his body. God, this big, strong man killed me. How could he think I didn't want to see what he looked like?

"You're the one who's been creeping in the shadows, Nix, not me," I gently pointed out. His lips touched my forehead, and my lips quirked upward.

"You're right."

"Why did you? I mean… you texted knowing who I was?"

"Yes." His voice was low and grave.

"And then… followed me around?"

"Yes," he admitted. My teeth bit into my bottom lip.

"Why? I mean… other than the obvious."

"Which is what exactly, baby?"

"I'm just me." I lifted my head. "I'm not… I don't know. I'm not anyone special. Why not just say hi, approach me?"

"I won't lie to you, Vivi. I wasn't sure." Something in my belly tightened.

"About?"

"You." Ouch, that was honest. My body locked in place. "It's not what you're thinking. "

"Sure, look, maybe—" I started to move from his lap, but he didn't let me. If anything, he turned me so I was straddling him, my hands resting on his shoulder.

"I know why it sucks for you, me saying this. Your parents were assholes."

"You know." Of course, he would. He'd followed me. He had probably looked me up. Maybe he worked at the precinct, too?

"I know. I know all about you. I don't know why you're not scared right now as I tell you this, but fuck me, I'm glad."

"Nix—"

"I've been divorced." I winced. I knew being sad he'd been someone else was irrational, but I couldn't help it.

"Oh?"

"And even before that, I thought the whole idea of love was ridiculous. And living the life I do, doing what I do, I saw parts of the word and life that only added to my resolve that forevers were never actually fairy tales but twisted tales."

"Nix—"

"But then you came along," he rasped. "One look at you and, Vivi, you… you changed me. Everything in my head and heart. Just one look at you brought out a side of me I didn't know existed."

"Nix—"

"And I thought learning about you would be enough. But it wasn't. Then I wanted to hear your voice. I was sure the moment we talked, I'd see there was no way in hell I'd have anything in common with you. "

"Why?"

"Because you're younger than me. You're my opposite in every sense of the word."

"I don't know about?—"

"I do. You're a walking, breathing, living ray of sunshine out in the world. I'm pretty sure you believe kindness can be spread like wildfire."

"I mean—" He chuckled.

"My point exactly. You make sure old ladies get on the bus safely and open doors for people."

"Make sure old ladies…" I started to repeat his words and frowned. He'd just confirmed how often he followed me.

"I told you, kitten, I'm obsessed with you. The more I learned, the more we talked… the hungrier I got." I shivered, but in a good way. Everything felt warmer inside of me. "And realized just how fucking wrong I was."

"About?"

"Love. Forevers. Happily ever afters. I might have not known it at the beginning, but I know it now, pretty girl." He leaned in closer, and I wanted to believe him.

His hands cupped my face, and suddenly, the blindfold loosened. It fell away, but my eyes were shut, and I couldn't get myself to find the courage to open them.

"Give me those gorgeous eyes, kitten. I need you to see me so I can keep telling you something." My eyes fluttered open slowly, adjusting to the bright light in the room.

My gaze was cast down, and I knew who he was without looking up at him. My head popped up and my eyes widened .

"It's you."

"It's me." His thumb stroked my cheek.

"I felt so guilty when we talked at night." My face heated as I reminded him of our dirty calls. "I imagined you."

"Fuck." His eyes shut, and his forehead leaned against mine. "I love you, Vivian Delacruz. You're mine. I love you so fucking much," he rasped, and I giggled.

It had been a long time since I'd heard those words from anyone other than Lana and her mom.

"Nix…" I couldn't get myself to say them.

I felt it.

I'd started to feel more than a crush a long time ago, but I was scared.

"You're not married… I mean anymore?"

"No. Fuck, no. I've been divorced for seven years." I nodded as my head spun. I couldn't stop looking at him. He was even better looking up close like this.

"You're mine?" I asked stupidly with so much hope inside of me I was afraid I was going to float right off his lap.

"All yours. Only yours. Moment you're ready, I'm gonna change your last name and keep you for always."

"That's crazy." I giggled nervously, but the smolder in his gaze never wavered.

"It's the truth," he stated, and I could see the determination in his stare.

"Well…" I stared into his beautiful eyes. "Good thing I like the sound of that." I giggled some more, but it didn't last long .

When his lips touched mine, it felt like my entire body caught fire.

Warming me from the inside out. The kiss was soft at first, a barely-there touch, but with every drag of his lips along mine, it got hotter, heavier. Hungrier. Before I knew it, I was a squirming mess on top of him. I felt empty as I rubbed against the long, hard bulge behind his pants and needed so much more. I was close to making myself come, but I couldn't get there.

"You're wearing too many clothes," I huffed impatiently against his mouth. The rough exhale of his breath tickled my lips.

"You're telling me," he rasped. "But I can't get myself to lift you off me. Not yet."

"Nix," I whined and didn't miss the way his lips quirked up and his eyes warmed like he thought I was cute.

"Keep rubbing that tight little pussy against me," he panted. My hips did his bidding. "Need to watch you come," he grunted.

"Oh god!" My fingertips dug into the muscles of his shoulders while I rocked back and forth on him. It was almost embarrassing how wet I was. If I looked between us, I was pretty sure my shorts would look like I'd had an accident. I managed not to shut my eyes and watch him watch me. Through a hooded gaze, I stared at him, and his never wavered.

There was something erotic, intimate about watching your partner in the heat of the moment. Maybe it was because of how well we got to know one another that I felt comfortable, easy around him like that, despite having just officially met. Nix' hands dropped to my lower back and pressed me against him as he bucked upward.

"Find it," he strained.

"I can't. I need…" I was close but not close enough. The pressure was magnificent but not doing the trick.

"Tell me. Use your words, kitten," Nixon demanded, and it left me feeling bolder. Braver.

"I need more. It's not enough."

"You need more?" I was about to nod when he flipped us over, laid me on my back, and I gasped. "Yeah, you fucking do. Good girl telling your man what you need. Fuck." His Adam's apple bobbed. "What do you want, Vivi? My mouth? Hands?"

"All of it," I whined.

"Greedy, dirty girl." He winked and dropped to his knees before pulling me to the edge of the bed.

"Nix!"

"Fucking love how you say my name." Before I could think of something to say, his hands were pulling down my biker shorts along with my panties. "Fucking loved these," he murmured. I lifted myself up on my elbows.

"What?"

"Those panties." It should have scared me, at the very least weirded me out he'd been inside my apartment, gone through my drawers, and had touched my delicates, but maybe we weren't as different as he thought?

Maybe I had a dark side that matched his perfectly, because knowing it only made my sex clench harder.

"Look at you, kitten. So fucking wet and dewy." His tongue ran across his straight teeth.

"Nix—"

"Shh, I got you." His fingers slid up and down between my folds. I was sticky wet and on edge.

"Nix." My voice cracked.

"I know, baby, but you gotta use your words for me, beautiful."

"Nix, please… touch me. Please! I need your touch." My hands clenched the sheets below me.

"Like this?" His thumb moved up and touched my clit, and I moaned. Loudly. I couldn't hold back. Nixon teased me relentlessly with the pad of his thumb while he drew small, hardly-there circles around my swollen clit. My toes curled. The friction made me so wet I could feel it.

But it still wasn't enough.

I squirmed against his touch, trying to find the pressure I needed, but his free hand held me in place. "Uh-uh," he tsked. "What do you need to do for me, pretty girl?"

"Hard. I need more. Inside. Lick… lick me. Oh god!" His finger dipped inside of me, and he made a dark rumbling sound that reminded me of an animal. Before I could look at him, his mouth was there .

I'd watched movies. Read dirty smutty books that made my heart race. But never had I actually experienced anyone's mouth on me. And Nix' mouth? He hadn't been eating me for a minute yet, but he easily had a five-star rating from me.

He started kissing my pussy. Soft brushes against my sensitive folds that made me squirm and ache. The scruff on his jaw tickled and set delicious sparks of heat throughout my body. Up and down. And before I could get used to it, he really started to lick. Licks turned to devouring. I was breathless as my back arched off the mattress, trying to move my sex closer to his face. His mouth never stopped, all while he finger-fucked me.

It was beautiful.

The sensations made me feel like I was about to come out of my skin.

"Oh! Oh! Oh, Ni-Ni-Nix! Gah!" I came. I reached the highest of highs and soared off a cliff of bliss.

My body convulsed, and I writhed against his mattress like I was a woman possessed, but I didn't care. All I could do was feel and let myself drown in the euphoria he created. Not that I got long to enjoy it. He pulled me up, and I realized he was completely naked. Somewhere between making fireworks burst behind my eyes and me catching my breath, he'd torn everything off his gorgeous body.

He lifted me up and into his arms before settling the two of us back in the middle of his bed. Without saying a word, I opened my legs and straddled him, hovering right over his thickness while we kissed. It was slow and sweet and so perfect tears prickled in my eyes, but not one rolled down my face .

"We don't have to," he panted in a rough whisper when he pulled away. His eyes searched mine. "You can just rub against me, and that's enough." My hips moved. His jaw clenched and his eyes shut tight for a second. "Or we can stop and—" I didn't let him say another word.

I kissed him with a smile on my lips as I slowly started to drop down. "Vivi," he growled his warning, but I didn't want to hear it.

"I want you," I whispered confidently. "Can't you feel how much I want you?" His tip dragged against my folds before I stopped when he was lined perfectly at my entrance.

"Fuck, baby," he groaned and made sounds that fed something inside of me. He said I'd woken something in him, but he'd brought a sex kitten out of me. One I hardly recognized and didn't expect but fucking loved.

"I know. I know you would stop if I wanted. But I don't need to. I don't want to," I whispered, pressing my lips against his between words.

"Thank god," he groaned. "Take me, kitten. Take me all the way in." I nodded and started to take him inside of me. The tip of his dick nudged and started to slide inside of me. I gasped, and his arms wrapped around me.

"Nixon!" I cried out.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck!" he cursed. "You're so tight. Jesus Christ, kitten, so fucking tight."

"Oh god," I whined. "You feel so big, so good. Oh my god, honey." His lips crashed against mine, and in that moment, we were so close together we were no longer two people.

We were one .

I had no idea where I started and he ended, and I never wanted to find out. Nothing in my life had made more sense than the two of us. Forever. Everything I had lived in my life, the good and bad, had led me to him. And I was more than okay with it. I would do it all over again if it meant finding myself right here and now with him.

"Fuck, ride, ride me, kitten. Hard. Ride me," he growled, and I did as he asked. Slowly, I rose and dropped, taking him in and pulling him out. His thick length stretched me but felt incredible.

I felt whole.

"Nix, Nix, oh, wow, this… this is… Never ever had this, baby…"

"Fuck, yes, Vivi. You never had this, never will have anything but my dick feeding this pretty little pussy." His filthy words made my head swim with desire. I picked up speed.

Up and down, a little faster every time. I felt the coiling in my belly started to tighten. My breathing stuttered, and before I could even tell him how close I was, my orgasm plowed through me in a way all I was able to do was hold on and feel while my face dipped into the crook of his neck, making the moment even better.

Wrapped up in his arms, I breathed in as his scent filled my lungs. The moment was magical. Warmth filled me from the inside out a moment later as the sound of his roar echoed in my ears and his head rested against mine.

"Fuck," he panted. His lips touched the top of my head, and with a drowsy smile, I pulled away to look up at him .

"That was wow."

"Yeah, it was." His lips touched mine, and I knew my fate was sealed.

Nix was a stalker.

A man who had crossed countless lines and boundaries others could have got arrested for. But as wrong as it might have been, Nixon was mine, and it was so good I felt like I was living a real-life fairy tale.

Maybe I was just as crazy as he was.

"You're thinking pretty hard," he noted. I smiled as my hands moved up to touch his face.

"My hands feel heavy." I giggled softly, and his took hold of mine and rubbed them. I watched him tend to me, and when our eyes met, I let my heart do the talking. "I love you, too," I shared with confidence and courage. "I didn't think…" My eyes dipped to his thick corded throat. But Nixon needed my eyes. With time, I would learn he'd always want my eyes on his. His fingertips tipped my chin upward. When our eyes locked, I felt brave again.

"I didn't think I would ever want to fall in love. Putting that much trust and faith in someone… after my parents…" I made a face, and when his eyes softened, I knew he knew the whole story. "I have my chosen family. My cousin, Jenna, my best friend, Lana, and her mom are plenty for me, and I was okay with it staying like that for the rest of my life. But our calls, getting to know one another… you made me want so much more, Nix."

"Kitten…" His eyes searched mine, and I smiled, my body relaxed against his .

"I know." I rubbed my nose against his. "This whole thing is… it's fast and crazy, and you're a little…"

"Unhinged?" he guessed. I laughed a little too loudly; it almost sounded like a snort. He chuckled.

"Maybe a little. But maybe… maybe I'm a little unhinged, too, because I like that you were so… obsessed with me. I'm no one. I'm plain and?—"

"Shh, you don't put my girl down like that. My girl is one in a billion, kitten." His fingers stroked my cheeks, and when I leaned forward, he slipped out of me. I gasped, hating that I lost him. "You like me inside of you."

"I do."

"You love me? Even…" His Adam's apple bobbed. "Even after everything I did?"

"Nix—"

"I watched you. Sat outside your building, stared into your apartment, followed you on the bus, went into your apartment?—"

"Shh." My fingers covered his lips. "I know. I think… I think I love you for it, too. I love you for the man who talked to me all night long and made me feel special, seen somehow, in a world where anyone could just pass me by."

"I swear to you I will make you happy, baby."

"I know, and I'll make you happy, too."

"I love you, kitten. Love you so much more than I thought was possible."

"Show me," I whispered and felt him start to harden beneath me. "Already? "

"Baby, I got a feeling it's going to be like this forever."

"I'm okay with that, if you are." He rolled us over, pinning my body beneath his while I smiled up at him.

"I'm more than okay with that." I didn't get the chance to smile because his lips touched mine and we got lost in one another all over again.