14. Santa

Chapter 14

Santa

I panicked when Dario hadn’t believed me about who I was and pulled up my Santa glamour. It hadn’t been my plan and wasn’t at all how I wanted this to go down. I guess I thought, because he was a shifter, he would just believe me. Like he would somehow have already known and that no “evidence” was needed.

Of course, that was ridiculous given who I was. Collectively most of society didn’t believe in my existence. Full. Stop. I didn’t mind, not normally. If all I had to give was amazing childhood memories, that was a gift worth giving. But with Dario… it was different.

In hindsight, no one believed in me after a certain age, and even suspecting he might had been a stretch. That wasn’t true, some adults did believe, but the numbers were significantly lower than I preferred. Sadly, the number of people who believed in me decreased as a whole each year, they got lower and lower thanks to children being pushed to grow up faster and faster. But that was a different issue for an entirely different day.

And now he was staring at me. Not a movement or a word to be had. He stared. That was all. I couldn’t tell if it was because he was scared or shocked or happy—or what.

“Ho-ho-ho?” It came out as a question, which hadn’t been my intention, but it did its job. The next thing I knew, he was hugging me, apologizing for not believing me.

“You’re him. You’re Santa.” He squeezed me tighter, and I felt like I’d finally come home.

I hugged him back, holding on as tightly as I could in my current get-up. “Yeah, I am. And you’re a reindeer. How about that.”

He buried his face in my neck, scenting me deeply. I knew this was a thing shifters did, but in my head it had always been kind of creepy. Now, as he did it to me, I saw how intimate it was.

We stayed like that for a few minutes until Max got jealous and decided to try to get our attention. Silly dog.

“I think someone needs to go out.” I stepped back, hating to break our hug but not wanting Max to have his needs go unmet simply because I wanted to stay in Dario’s embrace for the next week or so.

“Don’t leave.” Dario rubbed his cheek against mine. “Please.”

“Not going anywhere.” I wasn’t sure I could if I wanted to, and I very much did not.

Dario took Max to the back door, and while I waited, I took off my glamour. This one had been extra taxing because it included glamouring my clothing, something I didn’t like to do. I finally felt like myself again when I was back in my real clothes—the ones that weren’t magically morphed.

A couple of minutes later, Max ran into the room ahead of Dario, who immediately took my hand. “That feels better.”

“It really does.” I gave his hand a squeeze. Touching him, feeling that connection—it was grounding in a way.

“Now what?” he asked.

I half-shrugged, unsure. So much had changed in such a short period of time, and I hadn’t fully processed it all. I led him to the couch, where we both sat down, Max settling onto my feet.

“I don’t know what’s next.” My life had been all laid out, and having a mate, especially one from the south, hadn’t been part of that. “I always thought I’d be alone. My job is pretty much all-encompassing, and I live... not here.”

Only it was so much more than that. It sounded so cliche to say I wasn’t like other guys, but I really wasn’t. Not even close.

“My job is my identity. You have your work and your reindeer and your personal life, and those are separate but intermingled. For me, it’s all one and the same. I am Santa. Sure, Chris works, but the essence of who I am is in my position, and I...”

I trailed off, a lump forming in my throat at what I needed to say next.

“I don’t think I’m good for you.” My voice cracked. I despised the words coming from my mouth. But if he was mine, the one meant for me, then wasn’t it my job to give him the best? He deserved better than the life I could give him. He deserved everything.

“I think I should be the one to make that decision, don’t you?” His shoulder leaned into mine.

I didn’t like that we weren’t facing each other, but if we sat in any other position, we might lose our contact, and right now, his palm pressed against mine with our fingers laced together was my lifeline. Letting go of his hand—I wasn’t ready for that.

“How about this?” He shifted his body, and I flinched. He must’ve sensed why because he held on a little tighter as he turned to face me, our arms outstretched but still connected. I managed to twist a bit as well. As much as I hated the awkward reach that made our touch possible, I had to admit this was better. I could watch his face as we spoke. Max was less impressed getting up and moving to his bed.

“Fate doesn’t make mistakes.” Dario was dead serious. He closed his eyes. “I refuse to believe that fate makes mistakes.”

I wasn’t sure if he was trying to convince me or himself. He inhaled deeply, and this time, when he let out his breath, he locked his eyes with mine.

“How about we just see where it goes? No mating marks until we both decide. No claiming, no promising each other forever. Just...”

“I guess we try this like the humans do,” I filled in for him, forcing a chuckle.

“Yeah, let’s do this the human way.” His words were hopeful, but there was no denying the underlying defeat in them.

“That makes this is a first date, right?”

He nodded.

I used some of my Christmas magic and had mistletoe appear, hanging above us. When I glanced up, his eyes followed.

“Humans kiss on first dates, right?” Because I wanted nothing more than to taste him, to prove to myself that this wasn’t all a dream.

“Yeah, I suppose they do.” A small smile spread across his face, and he stood up, pulling me with him, and leaned in, brushing his lips against mine in a sweet but far-too-brief kiss. But instead of pulling back, he pressed his forehead against mine and sighed happily.

I wasn’t sure what to say or do next and so I opted to savor the moment, sighing happily.

That must’ve been the sign he was looking for. He brought his lips to mine one more time in a passionate kiss—one that said all the things our words hadn’t. It was a kiss that said we might not be promising each other tomorrow, but there would be one and another and another and another. We just needed to figure out how to make that happen.