Chapter 84

Stop!” I exclaimed and slapped him on the shoulder, which only made him laugh harder. “It’s not that funny!”

We’d gone from sitting to sprawled out on our backs, nestled between mounds of blankets.

“It’s not funny!” I repeated, my voice rising a notch. Killian was laughing so hard he was nearly wheezing. “Ian!”

“I can’t fucking help it!” he said. He covered his face as he tried to control himself. “I find it fucking funny that the only other man you’ve kissed tried to lick your fucking tonsils. Who the fuck does that?”

“Gary, that’s who,” I retorted. I should’ve felt bad for giggling with him, but it was hard not to laugh at such an awful first kiss.

“And you kissed him twice!”

“For research! It was for research!”

“What research?” he scoffed.

“I had to know if he was really that bad!” It was worse the second time around. And that single thought had me falling apart in a fit of giggles. “It was so bad.”

“I’m not at all fucking bothered by this.” Killian rolled on his side and tugged on my hip to make me face him. That handsome grin on his face did unspeakably inviting things to my core, and I clenched my thighs together. “It’s every man’s dream to have his wife kiss another man and it turns out to be so awful she ghosts him.”

“God, I’m horrible,” I groaned. “And what about you? Wasn’t there anyone for you?”

“Not a fucking one.”

“You’re telling me you look like that and no one tried?” I demanded.

“I never said they didn’t try,” he corrected. “Hell, Violet touched my dick once.”

“Excuse me?” I exclaimed. Tiny little lingerie model better not have. It only made Killian laugh harder.

“Once!”

“I’m going to kill that little blonde wolf.” I made a playful display of trying to get up, but he caught me around the waist and dragged me back down.

“Get back here, you crazy fiend,” he said.

“I’m going to kill her.”

“Baby girl, it was one time!” Killian replied, but I could barely make out his words as he laughed.

“I don’t care! She didn’t need to touch your… you know!” My cheeks burned as I tried not to say that word in his mother’s house. I didn’t need Maeve to overhear me.

“Dick?” He cocked one brow—damn man. Something so simple shouldn’t have been so sexy. Still, I scowled at him, which was harder to make my face do than it should’ve been.

“That.”

“Say the word.”

“Not here!”

“Say the word dick, princess.”

“She didn’t need to touch your dick!” I slapped a hand over my mouth as the words came out way louder than intended. In a house of wolves, there was no way I wasn’t heard.

“That’s my dirty girl.” He grinned. Stupid man… stupid, sexy man. “And it doesn’t matter. It wasn’t that impressive.”

“I think it’s impressive.”

“I’m a grower, not a shower, baby girl. She got a handful of nothing.” The look on my face made him break down all over again.

“Still going to kill her,” I grumbled. Violet Atwater touched my husband’s dick—separated or not, the tiny little lingerie model didn’t belong anywhere near his dick.

“God, you’re fucking adorable when you’re possessive,” Killian said. His thumb traced the curve of my bottom lip, and my pulse kicked up. The heat of his body, the softness of the blankets, the security of it all. I was overwhelmed by all of it—wanted more from it. “What’s going on in that pretty head of yours?”

“What if I put a donut on your dick and ate it off?” I asked because apparently, that was where my mind went instead of just saying I wanted to kiss him. What in the world was wrong with me?

“That’s a waste of a donut!” He burst out laughing. “Baby girl, you don’t even like donuts.”

“I like your dick.”

“I’m aware,” he replied.

“How many donuts could you—”

“Nine the last time I checked,” he said before I could finish. I gasped. He didn’t!

“Ian!”

“What?” he exclaimed. “It was a weird fucking weekend with Roan and Axel! It involved a Walmart trip, three dozen donuts, and a weird fucking dare.”

“I don’t even want to know—I do, but I don’t.”

“I beat them by one fucking donut,” he told me with more pride than any man should have about donuts on his dick. “They were one inch thick. Roan checked. It means my dick is—”

“I know what it means!” I cut him off, giggling. “Please, tell me the three of you didn’t eat the donuts after…”

“Fuck no! We did eat the extras though. It was still a waste of fucking donuts.”

“Of course.” I smiled. Scooting closer, I pressed a kiss to his scruffy jawline. This man and his donuts. “Why do you like donuts so much anyway?”

“They make me think of you,” he answered. “More specifically of the day I walked you home from Waverly’s.”

“Oh.” Emotion clogged my throat. It was a silly thing until he said that. Honestly, I just thought he liked the sugar.

“Don’t get me fucking wrong, I’ve always liked donuts, but now… now, I think of you whenever I eat them,” he continued. “It’s not the only way I carry you with me.”

He turned his head to show off the tattoo on his neck. The intricate design was geometric with a downward-facing arrow with choppy pieces to create a compass in the middle. Two black birds flew around the compass while a small one flew over the feathers on the arrow. Written in Roman numerals on one side of the compass…

Oh.

My chest tightened.

April nineteenth…

“That’s beautiful,” I whispered, blinking back tears. Bittersweet and beautiful.

“I wanted to carry both of you with me always,” Killian told me softly.

“For such a tough guy, you’re awfully sweet.”

“Don’t go telling people that.” He kissed me chastely. “You’ll ruin my reputation.”

I made a sound, completely unimpressed by the tough guy reputation. Despite how intensely he’d changed in three years, so much of him was the same. He was a blend of old and new—things I could find comfort in and things I wanted to discover.

I wanted to be like him. I wanted the past to build and change me for the better instead of letting it destroy me. There was no doubt he’d had his struggles, but he’d grown with them. I could stand to do a lot more growing.

“What are you thinking?” he asked, those dark eyes searching mine. I didn’t have the words to explain to him the overwhelming emotions crashing together inside me, so I kissed him. His mouth slid across mine as I wiggled closer. His fingers curled around my neck, and I moaned.

And then the back door slammed open. Both of us lurched upward. I scrambled away from him, feeling a lot like a teenager caught doing something I shouldn’t have as my heart galloped in my chest.

“Don’t mind me, darlings,” Maeve seethed as she stormed through the house.

“Mom,” Declan growled, hot on her heels. The rest of the Byrnes were right behind him in the weirdest angry parade I’d ever seen.

“I’m going to kill him, Declan. Don’t you dare try to stop me,” she snapped back. Oh, no. Whatever else she said was lost as she disappeared down the hallway.

“Fuck.” Killian was on his feet before the word left his mouth. “You stay.”

“But—”

“Genevieve, stay,” he ordered. He stared at me, waiting for me to protest. And he was right. I planned to. Because if I was right, my father was the one his mother was about to kill.

“No!” I hurried after him, and he grabbed me by the shoulders.

“Are you staying with me, or are you going with him?” he demanded. He didn’t bother to hide the rise in his voice. “Did I just waste my fucking time chasing after you? I told you, I can’t—”

“Let me help,” I interrupted. “It’s still you.”

“Then let them fucking handle it as a pack matter,” Killian replied. “I’m tired of fucking fighting this out with him. I can’t fucking win, Genevieve. But my brothers can take care of it for good in a way that doesn’t land me in jail.”

I chewed my lip.

“Don’t do anything stupid, please,” I said. He kissed my forehead and left me alone in the living room.