Nine

Nine

Rhys

I don’t schedule Parker for another week. If a client starts showing up on my schedule regularly, Tony wants to know more about them. I don’t want Parker anywhere on his radar.

When I get to his apartment, he makes me put on one of his sweatshirts again because it’s cold out and then pushes a mug of hot chocolate in my hands.

“You realize I’m here to fuck you, not get babysat,” I tease, but I do take a sip of the hot chocolate, and it tastes fucking amazing.

“Just warm up for a minute,” Parker replies, taking my free hand and leading me to sit on his bed with him. “You’re here for two hours; we’ve got plenty of time. We can talk while you drink that.”

I shake my head, kicking off my shoes before turning to lean back against the headboard of his bed. “Someone really failed you when they taught you what hookers do.”

“You’re the one who told me to forget about the money,” Parker says. “That’s what I’m trying to do. Because if I think about the fact that I’m paying for your time, it makes me not want to do anything with you.”

“Okay, okay.” I surrender and take another sip of the hot chocolate, letting the mug warm my fingers. “What do you want to talk about?”

He waits a beat before asking, “If you could be anything else in the world, what would you choose?”

It sounds a little like the opening to roleplay,  so I ask, “What would you like me to be?”

His lips press into a thin line. “I’m really asking you, Rhys. It’s not about sex.”

I pull my lower lip in to chew on it and watch his eyes darken. “I don’t know,” I answer honestly. “I haven’t thought about it much.”

His fingers brush my cheek, a feather-light touch that has my heartbeat jumping. “Why not?”

“Because you really don’t get out of this life unless you die.” I mumble the words as embarrassment heats my skin. I hate talking about this stuff. As long as Jack’s in danger, there’s nothing I can do to get out of this life.

He frowns, letting me know I’ve said the wrong thing. Before I have the chance to apologize, he asks, “Where were you before this?”

“We lived in Carmel-by-the-Sea.” Even speaking the name makes me miss it so much that it hurts. It was such a nice area—like something out of a storybook. The complete opposite of my lifestyle now.

“Is that where your family still is?”

“I think so.” Most of the pictures Tony’s shown me of Jack have him outside or getting off the school bus. Rarely in front of the house. And I haven’t spoken to them since the day Tony took me away. And that’s a time in my life I try really hard not to think about. Those days I spent at the training cabin were some of the loneliest I’ve ever experienced. They were full of nothing but pain and fear.

I stare down into the half-empty mug, trying not to think about how nice this feels. I haven’t had anyone concerned about whether or not I was warm enough in a really long time. My parents would love Parker.

“So Tony took you away,” Parker says when I’ve been silent a while.

I nod.

“Your parents had nothing to do with it?”

The question makes my stomach clench. It wasn’t something I ever thought about. Tony never mentioned it. If my parents had something to do with it, I’m sure Tony would’ve paraded that in front of me. “I-I don’t think so.”

Memories of my home, that safety, start pressing in on me until I can almost smell my mother’s perfume. Almost feel my father’s strong arms around me. Almost see Jack barging into my room, demanding I play a game with him in the way only younger siblings can.

“Did Tony ever hurt you before he took you away?”

I shift my gaze to stare at the base of the lamp on Parker’s nightstand, wishing he’d drop the questions. This is the stuff I don’t ever want to tell anyone. “No, he didn’t. But I never liked him much because he made me feel uncomfortable.”

“Did you tell your parents that?” His voice is soft and full of concern, making the ache in my chest only burrow deeper.

“No. It felt…weird.” Looking back now, I wish I had said something. My dad wasn’t the type to choose a friend over his kids. If I told him how uncomfortable Tony made me, the way Tony looked at me when we were alone, Dad would’ve made it stop. But Tony was his supervisor. I didn’t want to make things bad for him at work. And I really thought Tony would just stop eventually.

“So you haven’t talked to anyone in your family since Tony took you away?”

“No. I’m not allowed to contact them.” I haven’t tried either. I can’t take the chance that Tony was telling the truth when he said he had someone watching them. Especially now that Jack is the same age I was when Tony took me. I can’t stand the idea of him being in this life too.

My throat tightens, making me lean over to put my mug on the nightstand. Then I reach for Parker again, digging my fingers into his hips. Tony would punish me if he found out I was telling all of this to Parker. “Please, I-I don’t want to talk about it anymore.”

“Okay.” Parker squeezes my elbow. “Okay, we can stop talking about it.”

I take a steadying breath and release it slowly. But before I have the chance to say anything, Parker says, “I’m sorry for everything that’s happened to you.”

“I deserved it.” The words come out of my mouth before I even realize I’m going to speak them. They’re so practiced. Tony told it to me every day for weeks when I was in that cabin with him. And eventually, I started repeating it back to him, but I always held onto the memory of who I was before him. Maybe I wasn’t the best kid, but I knew I didn’t deserve it.

From the way Parker’s body stiffens, I have a feeling he’s thinking the same thing. “You didn’t,” he says.

“You don’t even know me.” I’m not sure why I’m arguing with him except that his kindness is putting me on edge again. No one should be this nice to me.

“I know enough,” Parker says softly. “I don’t like the thought of you getting hurt.”

“Yeah, well, it’s kind of par for the course with this job.”

He’s quiet for a second, studying my face. Then he asks, “What if you didn’t have to work this job anymore?”

It’s an innocent enough question, but it makes my heart hurt. “I already told you we don’t usually get out.”

“But if you could—”

“I’m not going to,” I interrupt, irritation flaring to life in my veins. “And even if I did by some miracle, what would I do? This is my only work experience, and I haven’t been in school since I was fifteen years old. Where would I go? My parents would never want me back, and without a job, I can’t afford anything.”

I don’t mean to say it all, but Parker’s endless push about this only makes it all feel even worse. I don’t want him to give me hope or promises.

“I’d help you,” he insists.

“I don’t need you to help me. I just need you to fuck me.”

“Rhys—”

I don’t let him finish. I climb into his lap and put my hands on his shoulders for balance. He immediately drops his hands to my waist to help steady me, and I welcome the touch. This is what I know. What I’m good at. And this with Parker feels good.

“Rhys, you don’t have to do this.”

I shut him up by leaning down and pressing my lips to his. Memories of home keep trying to crash in on me, but I don’t let them. It doesn’t matter what Parker thinks; this is my life, and it’s never going to change. There’s no use in dreaming that it ever will.

“Rhys…”

“Please.” I kiss him again, clinging tightly to him. “Please, just help me forget about it all for a minute.”

I don’t have to fake the need in my voice. My body is craving his, and he will help me forget about Tony and all the other bad stuff for a while.

“Okay,” he whispers, and I pull back enough to read his expression. I need to make sure he really is okay with it because I’d never want to hurt him. When I meet his gaze, he gives me a nod.

I wriggle out of his grip and move down between his legs. He’s already hard. Already leaking. So I slide just the tip of him into my mouth, savoring the salty taste on my tongue.

He groans, and pushes his fingers into my hair, but just like the last time I took him in my mouth, he doesn’t guide my head at all.

I take him in inch by inch, relaxing my throat to avoid gagging over his length. When his head brushes the back of my throat, I lift a hand to cup his heavy balls.

He grunts, his fingers tightening in my hair. “Shit, Rhys.”

I hum loud enough to vibrate it up his dick, and he hisses. Precum is leaking down the back of my throat, and my back is sore from the position, but I want to please him. And just like last time, the noises he’s making are turning me on. Making me want this too.

“I could watch you in this position for the rest of my life,” Parker says, his voice full of desperation. Ragged.

It’s not the first time someone’s said something like that to me, but it’s different coming from Parker. I want to hear it from him. I want to know I’m doing a good job. That I’m pleasing him beyond whatever he thought was possible. With him, it’s easy to push aside the memories of Tony and all the other clients.

I feel like I could stay in this position for the rest of time. Solely with Parker. I crave his approval. I want to know that no one’s ever made him feel as good as I have.

But Parker has other plans.

“Stop, stop,” he breathes. “I want to come inside you.”

I pull my mouth from him and move up the bed to straddle him, but he grabs my waist to stop me.

“I don’t want you to hurt yourself,” he says. “There’s lube in the drawer.”

I shake my head before he’s even done talking. “I’m fine.”

Disbelief shines in his eyes, but he doesn’t make me. And it’s that moment that I realize this is just who Parker is. He really cares. He doesn’t want me to get hurt. I was the one who insisted on money, and it wasn’t just because of Tony. It’s because the thought of Parker wanting me outside of that scared me.

Quickly, I roll a condom on him, then I watch his face as I lift up and sink slowly onto him, letting his length enter me fully. The stretch burns like I knew it would, but I don’t mind it. All I want is to feel close to Parker. He makes me feel safe. Wanted.

He groans and fastens his hands on my hips, helping me keep my balance as I slowly ride him. His eyes shine in the glow from the lamplight as he stares up at me, his breath quickening every time I lift up and sink back down onto him.

“You feel so good,” he murmurs, his voice full of need. His cock thickens inside me, so I speed up my pace, watching as his body flushes. Sweat beads his forehead and chest as he lifts his hips to thrust into me every time I drop back down.

The sound of our skin meeting echoes throughout the room, mixing with my grunts and Parker’s moans. His thighs start trembling, letting me know he’s close. So sink down on him, as deep as I can allow him to get, and clench my ass hard.

“Fuck!” His fingers dig into my hips as he comes so hard that his back arches off the bed. The warmth fills me, and for once, I like it. Even with a condom between us, I like knowing I brought Parker to orgasm.

When he comes back down, I gently ease off him and get rid of the condom. As soon as I come back to the bed, Parker pulls me down, nestling me underneath him. I expect him to drift to sleep, but he kisses me instead before lifting up to settle his body between my legs. My cock is hard and leaking after feeling Parker inside me, but I hadn’t planned on doing anything about it. Not unless Parker said to.

He leans down, placing a kiss on my bruised shoulder. He’s so gentle that it doesn’t even hurt. I close my eyes as his lips move down my body, kissing every bruise I have. I let my body relax into the mattress. Let myself get lost in the feel of Parker touching me.

His mouth brushes my ribs, then moves down to my hip. My skin prickles with heat. With…with want.

He moves down to my thighs, and I squirm a little. When he glances up at me, my whole body flushes.

“Sorry,” I mumble. “I didn’t mean to move.”

“You don’t have to ask my permission to move.” He watches me for a second, making sure his words sink in, then he wraps a hand around my cock and slides it up and down. His gaze stays locked on my face, making me squirm again. Clients so rarely look at my face when we’re together. This makes me feel so exposed. Vulnerable.

“You’re so beautiful,” Parker murmurs. His thumb swipes over the head of my cock, and I can’t stop from whimpering. It just feels so good. So much better than it ever has before. And it doesn’t take long for Parker to have me writhing on the bed, thrusting up until I come in his hand.

He leans down to kiss me, gently, like he’s telling me a secret.

And I wish I never had to leave.