18. Chapter Eighteen

Chapter Eighteen

Liam

I glance down at my arms, and when one of them hiss at me, I almost drop all three of them. "She's not here to protect your ass anymore. I'm not above taking you back there."

All three of them seem to cower at my words, and I look back up as I walk into the house. One of the nurses smiles when he sees me, but then he sees the three ugly cats in my hands, and his smile drops.

"I'm sorry–"

I cut him off before he tells me what I already know. "I know, okay. I just–"

"Liam!"

I turn at the sound of Capri's voice, and her face lights up when my eyes meet hers. She glances down at the cats and then at the balloons in my hands, and her smile doesn't falter.

"I think we can make an exception since it's a holiday." She rests her hand on my arm and guides me in as she tells the other nurse not to worry. He doesn't question her and we walk into the house.

"How is she today?"

"She's been really good."

I let out a breath, and when I look over at Capri, her smile seems sadder.

"I wish you'd stayed last night. She was much better after a while and was asking for you."

I don't reply to her because I don't have anything to say. I know it's not Mom's fault that she's angry at me for what happened to my baby sister, and it's not her fault that she sometimes forgets me or confuses me with my asshole dad. I know it's not her fault, and maybe I'm selfish for not sucking it up and taking every blow she throws at me, but I just can't sometimes.

"How are you?"

I only nod, and Capri doesn't push it, but I feel her eyes on me as she walks me to my mom.

She's in the backyard on a blanket near the pond. I take in her favorite yellow sundress she's in and she looks at peace. I hesitate before walking over because I don't want to ruin her day. I watch her from a distance for a while, but after a few minutes, I walk over before I change my mind and leave.

"Hey."

She looks up at the sound of my voice, and when she takes in everything in my arms, her smile widens.

"Oh! Is it someone's birthday?"

I settle next to her on the blanket but keep the cats close in case she flips out.

"It's your birthday, Mom." I hand her the balloons and gift, but she shakes her head like she's disappointed, yet she still smiles.

"It's not my birthday, sweetheart." She laughs softly as she plays with the string of the balloons. "You were never good at remembering it." She laughs again and I watch her smile, silently wishing she could always be this happy.

"I remembered this year."

She shakes her head again and cups my face. "You remembered, but you got the date wrong again, sweetie."

"If you say so," I give her a shrug. "It's your birthday. What do I know?"

She looks down when one of the cats meows, and I wait for her reaction, but she only lets out a soft gasp and reaches for one.

"Oh, these are beautiful." She smothers the smallest one, and when she kisses it, I'm suddenly grateful I got them cleaned before coming here. I let the other two out of my grasp and they make their way over to her. They climb her lap, and I feel myself smiling when she laughs again.

"Do you remember–" She laughs harder. "Do you–"

I feel a laugh bubbling in my throat as she struggles to contain herself.

"Do you remember when your sister tried taking the poor neighbor's cat home?" She laughs and laughs, and I barely blink as I keep my focus on her.

"We were walking home and she snuck up to their porch and just scooped up that poor thing."

I smile at the memory. Shanti attempted to catnap that cat every day that week and failed, but she was determined that day, at least as determined as a three-year-old could be.

When we passed the house, she tippy-toed all the way across their yard before grabbing the cat from behind. She got scratched across the face by the shit, and I almost killed it when she cried. Mom said it was unfortunate, but now she'll learn not to touch animals without asking. I guess she did learn, but her scar wasn't pretty.

Now that I think about it, it was definitely our fault for letting her do that, but it was cute watching her try to be sneaky. I genuinely didn't think the cat would scratch her since it's only ever been friendly, but I guess she scared it.

My mom suddenly pushes the cats off of her, and I pull them closer when I see her getting upset about something.

"Your dad was angry when he saw Shanti's scratch." She shakes her head, and when one of the cats makes its way back to her, she softly pushes it further, so I grab it and hold all three in my arms again.

"He doesn't know how to control his anger, Liam." She hugs herself as she thinks about him. My dad never put his hands on her, but his anger was genuinely insane to me, and it makes me feel like I can't breathe when I think about how I got that trait from him.

"You should take them back outside before he sees them." She glances at the cats, but I can tell she wants to hold them again.

"He won't be back for a while. They can stay a bit longer."

She asks me if I'm sure, and when I tell her I'm certain, her smile is back and she takes all of them onto her lap again.

"They are so perfect." She rubs one of their stomachs, and her words remind me of Sage before her meltdown in the shelter. That woman really is a headache, but I think I would've taken ten cats if she cried about it, and the thought makes my stomach turn. I don't know why I care so much about satisfying her, but I do, and it's unsettling.

"Did you let your sister see them?"

My eyes snap back to my mom, and she's watching me, so hopefully.

"Yeah." I lie, and her smile widens.

"How was she with them?" She looks down at the cats again and leans against her elbow. "The doctor says pets are beneficial for children with Down syndrome, but your father is against the idea." She shakes her head like she's annoyed with him, and I just want her to be happy again, so the words slip past my lips.

"He changed his mind. We're going to keep the cats."

My mom looks up at me with the brightest smile I've seen.

"For Shanti."

She leaps from where she is and wraps her arms around my neck. "How did you convince him?"

I tell her it took a lot of debating, but he caved after a while, which is probably the biggest lie I've ever told. When he was set on something, there was no changing his mind.

"Open your birthday gift." I push the gift to her and scoop up one of the cats when it walks off too far. I don't know if these things can swim, but I'm not going in that pond for either of them.

"It's not my birthday, Liam. You and Pri are very confused today."

We're confused? I bite back my smile because it's a dick move to laugh at her confusion, but she makes it too easy.

She looks over her shoulder and rolls her eyes at someone. When I follow her line of sight, my eyes land on Capri, who's watching us carefully.

"I know she's my best friend, but she doesn't listen very well. She keeps asking if I'm okay, and I've told her hundreds of times I'm fine ." My mom looks at me for a response, and I glance at Capri before rolling my eyes.

"Tell me about it."

My mom covers her mouth as she laughs, and I smile down at her. Not even a minute passes before Capri makes her way over to us, and my mom sits up, but she looks guilty.

"How's it going over here?"

My mom glances at me and shakes her head, and I do the same before rolling my eyes again.

"We're fine , Pri. I don't need a babysitter." Her words are far from harsh but still laced with sarcasm.

"No?"

I glance up at Capri, and she raises her brows. "Liam sure does think so since he brought you here for your birthday."

My mom's head snaps over to me, and I have to turn away from her so she can't see me laugh.

I act like I'm clearing my throat before I look back over at my mom. "She doesn't know what she's talking about. It's not even your birthday." I shake my head and she agrees with a nod as she lays on her back with the cats on her stomach.

I bite back a smile as I glance up at Capri, and she laughs softly before walking off. I remind my mom to open her gift, and she doesn't tell me it isn't her birthday; she simply opens it instead.

"Is this a puzzle? I love puzzles!" She goes on about how she completed one with a thousand pieces the other day, and I'm not sure if I believe her, so I make sure to fact-check that with Pri later.

When she flips the box over, she stares at the picture the puzzle is supposed to make, and she runs her fingers along Shanti's face. "Where did you get this?"

"I had it custom-made."

She looks up at me with teary eyes, and I don't know what changed in the last few seconds, but when her tears start falling, I take the puzzle and hide it behind my back.

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you. Forget about–"

"No, I'm not upset. Here, let me have it."

I hesitate, but she urges me, so I give the puzzle back to her. I keep my eyes on her, and she keeps her gaze on the picture.

"She was so tiny."

I look down at the puzzle box, and my chest tightens at the picture of us in the hospital the day Shanti was born. I'm sitting on the bed with Mom and she has Shanti in her arms, wrapped in a white blanket. She was so tiny, Mom had to tilt her so you could see her face. I remember her being the smallest in the NICU. I refused to even hold her because she was barely bigger than my hands, and I was convinced I would crush her.

"She's getting so big, Liam."

I wipe my mom's tears, and she holds my hand on her cheek. "She's turning four soon, can you believe that?" Shanti would've been twelve this year, but I swallow the lump in my throat and smile at my mom.

"She said she wants a cat for her birthday. Do you think we're going to be able to hide these from her until then?"

My mom smiles again as she looks down at the cats. When her brows furrow, I catch myself and realize I already told her I showed them to my sister.

"She's a nosy kid." She laughs softly. "She'll find them. We can show her them and tell her it's an early gift." She nods to herself, proud of her idea, and I lean forward to plant a kiss on the top of her head.

We're in the middle of the puzzle when my phone starts ringing and I don't think of answering, but then I realize it's Sage and she must be out of the hospital.

"Give me a second, Mom."

She nods, and I walk a few feet ahead of her.

"Hello, Liam Leslie!" Sage smiles through the screen and she no longer looks like she was attacked by a beehive which is refreshing.

"Dory." I keep my eyes on her, and her smile widens, her pretty dimples popping.

"You know, I feel like you're calling me Dory because I'm calling you Liam Leslie, but jokes on you because I like the new nickname, and it's not going to make me stop calling you Liam Leslie." She holds her chin higher, and I raise my brows at her.

"Right."

She so clearly bites back as a smile.

"Well, if you enjoy being compared to a dumb blue fish–"

"She's–"

"She's not dumb, and neither are you." I finish for her, and when her face scrunches, I bite back a smile. "It was dumb for you to smother a cat when you're allergic to them."

"I forgot that I didn't have my medicine." She tries to defend herself, but she doesn't have a good case.

"Yes, Dory. I remember."

She burst into a laugh, and I shake my head at her. "I'll see you later tonight."

"Wait, do you still have the kittens with you?"

"Maybe."

"Can I maybe see them?"

I glance at the blanket and my mom still has all of them on her lap. I almost tell Sage no, but when I look back at the screen, she's watching me all hopefully with her big green eyes.

I let out a sigh and walk over to the blanket. "Let me see them for a second?"

My mom smiles up at me and gestures to her lap. I place them a few feet from her and give her my back before flipping the camera.

Sage awes at them and takes a few pictures through the call. "You're going to take them to the vet, right?"

"Sure."

"You mean yes."

"Sure."

"Liam Leslie!"

"Yes, Dory. I'll take them to the vet. Goodbye."

She makes me promise, and only after I do does she let me hang up. When I turn back around, my mom is watching me with a weird look.

"What?"

She shrugs and looks back down at the puzzle with a smile.

"I think you do know." I push, and she looks back up at me, her smile still present.

"Who was that?"

I tell her it was no one, but she only raises her brows at me accusingly. "I didn't know you were seeing anyone."

"I'm not." I grab the cat when it walks too close to the water again. I feel my mom watching me, but I don't look up and do the puzzle she's clearly struggling with. There's no way she did a thousand-piece puzzle.

"Is she your girlfriend?"

"No."

"But she's a friend who's a girl."

"I suppose."

"Hmm."

I look up at her, and I can't tell if she's humming at me or the puzzle since her eyes are on two pieces that clearly don't fit together.

"I suppose she's your girlfriend."

"She isn't, but you can suppose what you'd like." The cat walks off to the water again, and I scoop it up before bringing it to eye level. "I will let you drown ," I whisper to it before planting it in my lap, and as if he understood me, he stays put.

"Do you like her?" I like sleeping next to her. I open my mouth but immediately close it again because even if she isn't going to remember this, I shouldn't say that. "I'll take that as a yes."

"Don't."

"Well, does Shanti like her?"

I go to tell her that they haven't met and aren't going to, but I think about her question. I think my sister would've loved Sage. She loved everyone, but Sage would've been good with her. She's kind and soft. She laughs easily, and Shanti liked making people laugh, but most of all, she's pure.

That woman could probably find the good in evil people, and her smile could make them want to be better while her tears would stop them from ever causing harm.

Sage is full of so much life, it would've been a lot to have them both in the same place. No room would've been big enough to contain the energy of the two of them, but it's a room I'd want to be in all the time if my sister was there.

I don't answer her, and she doesn't ask about Sage again as we complete the puzzle, but she's on the front of my mind the entire time, and I don't know how to feel about that.