32. Amber

Chapter thirty-two

Amber

I didn’t know elves could run so fast.

I mean, I knew they were fast, but Ivas was gone before we thought to look for him. Probably smart on his part. Despite winning the battle, despite my being alive, Eldrin’s eyes carried a heavy weight, his hands bloodied from the fight, blood dripping from his arm from a shallow cut. He scanned the surrounding woods, hand clutching his daggers, poised to strike.

He would have killed Ivas if he stayed. Slowly.

“What now?” I asked, resting against Eldrin’s chest once he gave up the search. For now. Vanir was gone, vanished like water into the soil. The wind rolled through the trees, making a familiar music, a peaceful idyll completely at odds with what we had just seen. A king had melted. Was consumed. I looked at the barrier and shivered. These Woods were alive, I didn’t doubt that, but what I had seen emphasized that the elves lived within the sphere of some ancient magic that killed as well as it preserved.

I had acted on a guess, a desperate hope. At most I thought I’d distract him enough to let Eldrin attack. I never thought my actions would unleash something so cruel and terrible.

Eldrin swallowed. “I’m the king.” He shook his head, as if the reality was just occurring to him. “My brother has no other heirs, and there’s no one else in the royal family in our part of the Woods. I am the king,” he repeated, as if in disbelief.

“Oh,” I said. “Yes, you are.” If only I had the words to encourage him, even as my heart cracked.

We had shared a beautiful dream in the Woods, nights of exploring each other’s bodies, and days spent with a companionship I had never known. But there was no place for me here, even with Eldrin as king. The elves wouldn’t want a human as their queen, and Eldrin would need to take care of his own position—I had seen enough of elven court politics to know that Eldrin likely had a fight ahead of him. A human wouldn’t fit in, and in fact, I would be a danger to him by staying. A weakness. And I had a feeling that Eldrin’s struggle was only beginning. The elven court was a mess of politics, and not everyone would be happy that Eldrin was back in power.

“Do you want to go back to court with me, Amber?” Eldrin said. “Or you can go home now. For good. ”

“I can?”

He nodded. “The choice is yours. If you’re here and speaking with me, that means the bite worked. That veinwart brought you to the brink of death, but now you are cured. There’s no reason for you to stay.”

I moved my arm, relieved that the familiar pain and unnatural cold was gone, other than the sting of the fresh bite. I had been so distracted by Vanir trying to kill me that I didn’t realize that my shoulder no longer ached, other than the expected soreness that accompanies a wound. The bite had healed me.

Eldrin had healed me. In more ways than one.

A flock of little birds flew through the branches, hopping above us and chattering, almost as if they knew what we were saying. But did they understand the heart break that waited for me?

“What will you do?” I asked. “Now that you’re king.”

Eldrin took his time to answer, his gaze distant. “I need to return to Great Glen and assume my control over the throne.” His jaw set. “While I am the king by right, a lot could change if the court realizes that Vanir is dead before I am there. I need to act quickly.” And the last thing he needed was a human in the way while he did so. Our dreams while on the run quickly shattered when faced with reality. As I knew they would.

“Alright.” I looked at the barrier, choking back a sob. “I think I should go home, then. We’re already at the barrier. No point in dragging this out longer than we have to—and I’m guessing that it would be best if you didn’t wait here longer.”

He nodded slowly. “Unfortunately. Word can spread in surprising ways where the death of a king is concerned.”

I lied—there was every point in my dragging this out. Because I didn’t want to go. I didn’t want to leave his side. I was facing the worst breakup of my life and I didn’t want to say goodbye to him a moment sooner than I had to. But there was no point in staying and holding him back, in going deeper into the Woods, if I was just going to leave. It would be a distraction to him. A weakness. And who could predict what the elven court was going to do?

“Then…I think I need to go.”

“Alright,” he said solemnly. “If you’re sure you wish to leave, you may.”

“I think we both know that this is how it has to be,” I said, wiping my eyes. “You know what the court would do to me.”

“I know. And although I am a selfish man, I cannot ask you to stay. I cannot even ask you to come back in one year. There is no way of knowing what awaits me. But, Amber, I wish I was a more selfish man. Because there’d be no possibility I’d consider letting you go.”

He ran a finger across my cheek and placed a kiss on my forehead. I relaxed, holding back tears at the thought that I would never be able to hold him like this again. Maybe I was imagining it, but it felt like he was holding on longer than necessary, too .

The moments stretched, seconds feeling like hours as we clung onto a moment that neither of us wanted to end.

And then it broke.

“Here,” he said, bending down and picking up an acorn. He covered it with his closed fist for a few seconds, and when he passed it to me, it had a faint, silvery glow.

“What is this?”

“A benefit of being the king,” Eldrin said with a sad smile. “You saved me, Amber. You gave me back my life, and my throne. If you ever desire to return, if it ever happens that you change your mind, this will allow you passage one time. But…I cannot promise you will be able to return to your world if you do so. And I cannot promise anything about what you will find if you come through.” I would be risking finding that he was no longer king, or even dead, he meant. But I wouldn’t think such things. Eldrin would manage—he’d find a way.

He had to.

Instead, I asked, “Is the barrier still going to be difficult for people to pass through? Those who have your permission, I mean.”

“Probably. No magic lasts forever, and this magic is far from its home. But it will serve for a long while, if we are wise.” He looked at the barrier, that shimmering thing that had caused so much trouble. “I can sense it now, like my own limb. It is strong, but not immortal. If we are lucky, it will last us until the worlds return, should that day ever come. ”

I tucked the acorn close against me, in a small pocket in my dress’s bodice. I wouldn’t use it. I couldn’t use it. But I would always have that reminder of him. He had his life and destiny, and I would find mine. Somehow.

“Goodbye, Eldrin,” I said, touching his cheek with my hand, and he placed his hand over mine. “Thank you. For everything.”

“Goodbye, my Ember,” he said with a sad smile. He gave me one last, long kiss, as if he could consume me by doing so. One that was meant to stay with me, no matter what happened. A kiss that felt like an eternity. And then it was done, his lips gone from mine forever.

It was time to go.

After one final lingering look, I faced the barrier, holding my breath as I walked through the translucent wall. The magic stuck to my skin like a wet fog, threatening to smother me. A few steps farther and the air suddenly changed, turning more humid and hotter, and full of summer once more.

I was back in the human lands.

Now on the other side, I could barely make out Eldrin’s gray figure, lurking behind the wall. I waved, he slowly raised a hand and waived back, and then, alone, I began the long walk home.