Chapter 54

Fifty-Four

FINN

That the memory flashed forward to me in wolf form watching Felix as a toddler play at Cassa’s feet, meant the bad part was yet to come. I swallowed and wished for Wesley at my side, but only felt the barest hint of him through the layers of numbing cold that made me shiver. This dream layered over me while I lay staring up at the statue without the ability to move my head, a faded remembrance rather than the detailed replay. Strange.

The feeling of the omega strength saturating the area where Felix played calmed us both, though I sat near a tree, still not allowed to get close. Cassa had cast me from her bed and her heart despite my endless promises to care for our broken child. Two years and the amount of omega strength she had to use to keep him subdued made my jaw clench. His wolf’s hold was weak and fragile, but he was young.

Cassa promised over and over she’d take care of him, keep him in control. She researched endlessly, called elder pack members, witches, and any paranormal being we’d ever encountered for answers. Most were as stumped as she was. Whatever I was, which had partially passed to Felix, was a monster beyond anything of record.

I watched them play at the edge of the stream, Marina always close to help Cassa.

“He’s growing so fast,” Marina told me.

I nodded, though feared his wolf wouldn’t gather strength fast enough to control the darkness. How Cassa kept Marina from seeing his monster was a mystery to me. But Oberon remained near to keep mine in check.

Cassa’s gaze found me, accusation still in her eyes though I’d done nothing.

I sighed and got up, nodding at them before shifting to my human form and heading back to the main pack house to deal with whatever chaos the wolves brought me today. A hundred times I thought to leave and let Oberon care for the broken wolves, only the second I did, their darkness began to return. He could hold it back for a time, but he would have to destroy them eventually, and maybe it was my fault for letting them live and soak up more pain.

It didn’t seem to be a guarantee of age in a wolf, as Oberon was untouched and a handful of other wolves remained mentally sound. Not proximity either as a few dominants lived among my pack with no glimpse of the beast taking them over. Why did the madness touch some and not others?

“I think we should shift the pack around. Move some of the broken ones to stable alphas,” Oberon said as he followed. “It will ease the burden on you.”

“But we don’t know why it affects them or if it will spread to the other packs.” Sometimes it did, causing an entire pack to go feral, which meant I had to destroy them all. “Could you wish possible destruction on any pack?”

“I trust a handful of alphas to take care of their people,” Oberon said. “One wolf is not a heavy burden, even if it’s broken. Leave it to the alpha to decide if they are too far gone. Why must it always weigh on your heart?”

The human heart was far too fragile. My wolf complained about it all the time. The beast could overwhelm it easily and I’d let myself fall into the control of the other just to ease the ache. “It should be me, shouldn’t it? I’m the monster.”

Oberon sighed. “Only by choice, my friend.”

He wasn’t wrong, but I couldn’t burden anyone else with it either.

A scream echoed through the woods. I jolted into a run toward the noise, which was where we’d left Cassa. Oberon raced behind me, but the smell of blood and death reached my nose before I could exit the trees to the riverside and discover what had gone wrong. My heart pounded in fear that Cassa was hurt. A wall of doom encapsulated the area with oppression, darkness, and pain. The dark taint of magic stronger than I’d ever felt. Even my sire’s cave before he died hadn’t been the abyss of rage and agony this was.

But it was Marina who lay in a bloodied heap with Cassa’s arms around her, protecting her with her body as the toddler Felix in a nightmare monster form snarled and clawed at her. I growled and launched myself at him, ready to kill the monster I should never have let be born.

Cassa threw herself between us, and I froze, unable to hurt her even while Felix tore into Marina’s broken body giggling a terrible sound as though seeing more blood and broken skin with bone protruding made him happy.

“Cassa,” I said. “Cassa, the boy is broken.”

“He’s mine,” Cassa said. She unleashed her omega strength in a wall of calm so heavy I dropped to my knees unable to lift my head. Oberon did the same behind me, breathing heavily as if keeping upright at all were near impossible.

Felix calmed and shifted back to his toddler form, covered in blood, wide eyes staring at his mother. The wolf inside him disoriented, and I could sense it floundering for control.

Cassa wrapped her arms around him and the oppressive levels of darkness vanished. The wolf regained control and he sighed, and snuggled into her with a sweet sound of the baby he should have been.

“Cassa,” I begged.

“No,” she said, lifting him and walking away from us, her omega strength keeping us pinned to the ground. She vanished into the trees, leaving Marina’s lifeless body, and us unable to move until she’d gotten too far away to hold her magic over us.

I stared at the empty gaze of one of my pack, horrified that I’d been unable to protect her until the omega magic vanished, and I could rise to reach her. She didn’t deserve this. Marina had been one of our oldest female wolves. Never an alpha, but always protective and encouraging among the pack.

“I’ll get a pyre set up,” Oberon whispered.

“What do I tell the pack?”

“I don’t know.”

“I need to go after Cassa. Felix is dangerous.”

“Could you hurt him?” Oberon asked. “He’s your child, too. She’s kept him from you, but your wolf adores him.”

Marina’s blood was still warm as I held her broken body. It would be a lie to say I didn’t love Felix. He scared me, more than I scared myself, but I still loved him. He was mine as much as he was Cassa’s. Two years and I’d been trying to help teach him control, and failing miserably. The wolf in him would play with the other wolves for hours without incident, and something would shift, and he’d snap at someone, drawing blood. Accidents, I thought, and Cassa pulled him away to soothe him with her omega power.

She pulled away from me because she didn’t have the strength to soothe us both. Centuries I’d lived, and now relied on a single sweet omega to ensure my sanity. That said a lot of terrible things about me.

I lifted Marina and carried her toward our funeral spot, heart filled with grief. The beast wanted to break free, find Cassa and Felix, and end the nightmare. The wolf wanted to comfort his mate, and hold his pup. The human mourned. A war of three souls in one flimsy human skin.