19. Medusa

W e’d thrown a gauntlet. Benji had millions of followers and he gained more with all of this. One of his followers just so happened to be Pepper Crane, who was stuck in the house for her protection. She must have been bored, even with Lucky in the house, so she was puttering about online.

She saw Benji and Cas’s video and made sure it got blasted to anyone who might not have seen it. We expected them to respond with violence. But while we were waiting, I dragged Alecto to my bedroom because something was up with her.

“Seriously, what’s up?”

“What do you mean?”

I cocked an eyebrow at her. Megaera had told us Lucky was one of her mates when she had some downtime. That meant two of the original furies had found their mates. They were ecstatic and so was I.

“You don’t seem happy for your sisters. Are you jealous they found their mates?”

Alecto flopped on her back on my bed and groaned.

“Shit. If you noticed, then they definitely did. I’m not jealous. I’ve met two of my mates. I met one years ago, and he didn’t outright reject me, but he sent me away. That’s why I said if you ever went to a Meatball Hellscape concert to throw fruit at Orion Onyx. I met the other about twenty minutes ago.”

“Flying Spaghetti Monster and Lucifer are your mates?”

“It sounds even more ridonk when you say it.”

“Are you kidding? Orion Onyx and Lucifer are both insanely beautiful. I wasn’t with Dionysus when he appeared in that portable toilet because they said it can be traumatizing for new gods. He’s kind of a loner so I’ve never met him. Lucifer can be a lot but he’s actually a great guy.”

“Orion is a complete ass. I met him by accident when I was on vacation. We knew we were mates, but he said he didn’t want to complete the bond until he finished writing his new album. I helped him with it and as soon as we were done, he disappeared with everything we worked on and changed his number.

“I used my fury magic to find him and as soon as I found him, he was in bed with a groupie. Orion looked at me like he barely knew me and told me to join in or get the fuck out. I went back to the Underworld and everyone said that was their best album. It won countless awards.”

“What an asshole. If it makes you feel better, literally everyone thinks whatever he did when he was writing that album needs to be recreated. There was a ton of tension in the band with the next album and they briefly broke up. He tried to make a go with other musicians and it didn’t work. He had to go groveling back to his original bandmates, and they are supposed to be working on something new now. Sounds like he should have been groveling to you.”

Alecto started laughing.

“Do you know how hard you’d have to grovel to appease a fury? You’re different because you haven’t known you’re a fury for very long. We see the worst. He knew I could find him and that I’d seek him out. I’m fairly certain he buried himself in groupies until I did just so I’d catch him.

“It’s different when you fuck someone together or are both on the same page about it, but we never talked about that. If fact, he specifically told me numerous times he didn’t like people who only wanted him because he was a musician or could feel he was a god. Orion doesn’t make music for fame. He loathes fame and everything that comes with it. He does it because it completes his soul. He did that to get rid of me, but it didn’t outright reject me in case he changes his mind and wants me later.”

“Want me to turn him to stone so you can throw things at his statue? Pax can turn him back when you feel better.”

“I’d rather just forget I ever met him. I’m happy for all of you. I really am. It’s just not going to be like that for me.”

“Underneath all the swagger and daddy issues, Lucifer is actually pretty great, even if he can be annoying sometimes. But I’m guessing you scanned him with your fury magic as soon as you felt the connection.”

“Yes, and it was fucking annoying. His rebellion was justified and even those deals he makes when he’s pretending to be the devil aren’t totally wrong. He never makes deals that are going to harm any innocents and he’s helping a lot of people without taking too much in return. And I have a feeling that fucking yorkie is treated like a queen.”

“Josephine is spoiled rotten, but she can also turn into a giant hellhound with the mental capacity of a teenage girl, so it’s best to keep her placated or she explodes into hellfire and goes on a killing spree.”

“Noted. Spoil the yorkie with the fancy haircut.”

“So, maybe give the fallen angel a chance? He doesn’t date. I’ve heard him go on plenty of rants about he’d never go on one. The fact that he asked you after feeling the connection says a lot.”

“A fallen angel, a fury, and fucking Flying Spaghetti Monster. The Fates are fucking with me. Not as hard as they did to you, but still.”

“Oh, goddess, what if you have more out there and it’s even weirder?”

“Weirder than Lucifer and Flying Spaghetti Monster pretending to be an anarchist punk star? Don’t even speak that shit into existence.”

“I won’t speculate and end up cursing you if you promise to give Lucifer a chance.”

“Deal, I guess. Couldn’t happen with two mates, right?”

Lucifer wasn’t like that. I had no idea why Orion had done what he did. Lucifer had never once mentioned looking for or even wanting to find his mate, but Michael clued me into something. I didn’t know if they existed before Lucifer fell, but there were no female archangels now. Lucifer could have been in love with one and lost her during the first civil war. That could be why he was how he was about dating and commitment.

Still, I had a good feeling about this.