Chapter 16

CHAPTER SIXTEEN

M y mind is reeling as I pass through the corridors toward the Great Library. It seems Hethenos is responsible for everything bad that has happened. My jaw ticks as I try to hold in the anger, desperate to escape. I better not run into her, because I’m not sure I can hold myself back from unleashing it upon her.

Suda is restocking the shelves as I enter, and I’m thankful to see the place is deserted. She glances up as I approach, a small smile wrinkling the sides of her eyes.

“Zarla, dear, what can I do for you?”

“Fallen angels,” I whisper.

Despite the lack of ears to hear me, I don’t want to risk drawing unwanted attention.

Suda’s eyes scan my face, and she gives me a curt nod as she leads me through the library to the section on fallen angels. She glides her finger across three books.

“Let me know if you need anything,” she says and leaves me alone.

I take all three books from the shelf and place them down on a nearby desk with a thud. A puff of dust flitters into the air, and I cough, waving it away. All the books are thick with fine print, and I know I’ll be here for some time.

I spend the next couple of hours flicking through the books, learning everything I can about fallen angels. Fallen angels are angels who have usually committed a crime or broken one of the sacred angel laws. The Throne is then tasked to decide their fate, whether they are to have their wings torn off and be thrown down to Earth, or killed.

Most of them live out their lives on Earth without the slightest clue who they really are. It’s awfully cruel, and my heart aches knowing Kyle had to endure this for almost a decade.

I shiver at the thought of having my wings torn off. It must be excruciating. But that’s not what happened to Kyle, at least that’s not how it sounds. I continue flipping through the third book and find a section about fallen angels, a curse by way of magic. This also removes the angels’ memories, but if the magic curse were to be broken, then so too would their cruel fate.

But how can the curse be broken? And then I find it. Only an angel with a god or goddess bloodline, or an angel using the forbidden dark magic, can break the magic curse.

God or goddess bloodlines. I didn’t even know such an angel existed. I’m fairly sure Hethenos doesn’t have a god or goddess bloodline. She just didn’t seem the type. So it’s clear she must have harnessed the forbidden dark magic.

So according to this, I either have to find someone with a god or goddess bloodline, or I will need to harness the forbidden dark magic myself. I didn’t like the latter option, but I will do whatever it takes to get Kyle his wings back.

The section on dark magic is easy enough to find myself, as I know Suda will disapprove. I need to be discreet.

My mother’s words echo in my mind from her note, reminding me to trust no one.

I pull two books on dark magic and flick through them. Nerves twist in my stomach, and I know I am teetering on the edge of dangerous territory. I hear footsteps, and my heart hammers against my chest as I slam the book closed, scanning the library. But I’m still alone.

Calm down, Zarla, I tell myself as I reopen the book and continue reading.

Bingo. I find a section on using dark magic to remove an angel’s wings. It sounds like a dangerous task to even attempt to use this magic, and once you harness it, you are stuck with it. I shudder at the thought. Farther along, I read about a place within the Dark Forest, in a clearing, hidden deep inside the forest where you can call upon the God of Death for the power of the dark magic.

There’s an image of the clearing, and it looks ancient. It’s made from large stones with symbols etched into them surrounding a circular stone in the centre. It’s incredible, like ancient ruins from a time long ago. A time of the gods.

I’m studying the image when I hear footsteps once more and casually close the book, covering it with another one about guardian angels as Yimel and Rimel appear.

“Zarla,” Rimel says, his eyes filled with suspicion, “what are you doing?”

He leans up against the bookshelf opposite me and crosses his thick arms over his chest. Yimel circles me, clearly trying to see what book I’m reading. I only hope the guardian angel book is covering the others well.

An uncomfortable wave of anxiety creeps into my throat as I sense they’re checking up on me, but not at my father’s request.

Rimel narrows his eyes. “Why are you reading about the forbidden dark magic?”

Oh no. He saw it.

I swallow the lump in my throat. “Curiosity got the better of me, I suppose,” I say with a forced laugh.

I don’t think he buys it.

He pushes off from the shelf and takes a few steps toward me, and then he presses his hands down onto the desk as he leans forward. “Many angels have gone down that route despite the warnings. Once you dabble in the dark magic, it consumes you, often to the point of no return.”

Something tells me he’s trying to intimidate me, perhaps even scare me off this trail, so I have to play it cool.

“Oh, I heard someone mention it, and I was curious, that’s all. I would never actually use it.” I see Yimel in my peripheral vision, eying Rimel.

Yimel doesn’t say a word, and I can feel his eyes on me again. An unsettling feeling twists my stomach, and I have an overpowering urge to leave, but I can’t. I’m frozen to the chair.

“You wouldn’t be lying to us, now would you, Zarla?”

I meet Rimel’s untrusting eyes and hold his stare. I’m not about to be intimidated by this asshole. His accusation surprises me and feels more like a threat.

Yimel moves closer, and I can almost feel him brushing up against my arm. They are way too close for comfort, and I’m contemplating telling them to back off.

“We wouldn’t want to see anything bad happen to our future queen, now would we, Yimel?”

“Absolutely not,” he says, his breath warm against my ear.

Demetros and Lacinda step around the corner and halt as they take in the situation before them.

Yimel and Rimel back up away from me.

“Take care, Zarla,” Rimel says, and they leave.

I let out a long breath as I relax a little, more relieved than ever to see my friends. Demetros eyes them as they leave, and then he and Lacinda sit down in the chairs opposite mine.

“What was that about?” he asks.

I bite my lip, unsure whether to tell them the truth. The last thing I want to do is lie to my friends, but I don’t want to drag them into the middle of this either.

Lacinda reaches out and squeezes my hand, her brow furrowed with worry. “Are you okay?”

I meet her concerned eyes and give her a tight-lipped smile.

And then Demetros spots the books. He moves the guardian book covering them and snatches up the book on dark magic I was reading, holding it up.

“Dark magic? Seriously, Zarla?”

I rub my face and take a deep breath.

“Zarla, this is serious. What are you reading this shit for?”

I pick at my nails as they both stare at me. “A lot has happened that you don’t know about.”

Lacinda raises her brows. “We’re listening.”

I hold a hand up. “Hang on a sec. If you’re both here, then who’s looking after your human?”

They glance at one another for a moment. “Lissian called us back and sent some seconds to watch him. She said you needed us.”

My throat suddenly tightens as tears blur my vision. I swallow hard, trying to keep them at bay. So much has happened in these last few weeks, it’s becoming harder to hold it together. The thought of being able to release some of what I have been holding on to is a welcome relief.

I take a deep breath, relaxing my shoulders. “You have no idea how much that means to me.”

“Okay, you’re scaring me. What happened?” she asks.

Trying to decide where to begin is difficult, but it all started with Kyle, so I decide to start there. “Did either of you ever see me playing with an angel when we were little, someone who wasn’t from here?”

They both shake their heads, their brows furrowed with confusion.

“It’s hard to explain because I have no memories of it, but?—”

“Hold on, you have no memories of it?” Lacinda shakes her head. “I don’t get it.”

“Someone removed my memories. But I’ll get to that part soon,” I say, and she nods. “Kyle was an angel from Zarquon who used to come here to see me. I don’t know why, but we would hang out together all the time when I was younger. Lissian knew of him, but I don’t believe anyone else did.

“Kyle witnessed a conversation between two angels, a male and a female, and the female was saying how she killed my mother, and that they couldn’t let me reach my potential.”

Demetros opens his mouth to speak, but Lacinda beats him to it.

“What?!” she squeals, and I have to shush her. “Sorry,” she says.

I relax my forearms on the desk. “It sounds like it was Hethenos, but we’re not so sure about the male.”

Lacinda slams her fist on the desk. “That sneaky bitch.”

I shush her once more. “Keep it down, please. Anyway, she removed Kyle’s wings and his memories and threw him down to Earth. He woke up in a field all alone, with no idea who he was. He was only thirteen.”

Demetros leans back in his chair, stretching his arms above his head. “Wow, this is insane.”

“Yep,” I agree, “the sacred golden fountain bonded me to Kyle, as my human.”

Lacinda’s mouth practically hits the floor. “Shut up. Seriously?”

“Yes, seriously. After I went to Earth, watchers attacked. They have attacked here a few times now too, and something tells me it’s all connected. Kyle has powers, and I took him back here to the sacred golden fountain, and he got some of his memories back. He remembered that we knew one another. Finlay knows, and I have been trying to figure out a way to get Kyle’s wings back.”

Demetros leans forward. “Do you think that’s why someone was leaving you clues about your mother’s murder? Because they knew Hethenos did it?”

I glance at Lacinda, and she shuffles uncomfortably in her chair. “Sorry, I told him about the notes. I hope that’s okay.”

I smile at her. “It’s fine. Oh, and I have a weapon made by the gods, and I think Kyle might be my fated mate. I think that’s about it.”

They both stare at me through wide eyes. I’m not sure if I’ve left anything out, but it’ll do for now.

“Can I meet him?” Lacinda finally asks, her voice laced with excitement.

I laugh, relieved they’re taking this so well. “Not yet. We can’t tell anyone about any of this. There’s something seriously bad going on, and I think it’s all connected. My mother’s murder, Hethenos, Kyle, the watchers attacking. Everything.”

Demetros scratches his head. “Wow, this is crazy. That’s a lot for you to be dealing with on your own.”

I pick up the third book on dark magic and flip to the page showing the clearing in the Dark Forest, and then spin the book around to show them. They both read it before Lacinda’s eyes snap up to meet mine.

“No, no, no. Don’t tell me you’re thinking of going there?”

I understand her concern. The Dark Forest is a dangerous place, but after my encounter with the Zelons, it doesn’t feel so scary to me. And at this point, I’m prepared to do anything to help Kyle. I can’t send him off into the Dark Forest. This is something I have to do.

“Oh no, she is,” Demetros says, reading my expression.

I raise my hands. “What? Tell me what other choice I have.”

They glance at one another, and Demetros shrugs. “Okay, I get it. But the Dark Forest is dangerous. Imagine if you ran into a Zelon. What then?”

I bite my lip, and Lacinda claps her hands together. “Oh. My. Gods. You already have, haven’t you?”

I smile, pressing my teeth together. “Yeah, maybe. I kind of rode one.”

Demetros whistles. “Damn, girl. You’re full of surprises today, aren’t you?”

I can’t help but laugh, and the relief I feel is unreal. I literally feel fifty pounds lighter after finally spilling the beans to the both of them, and I’ll have to remember to thank Lissian.

“So when do we go?” he asks.

“Oh, you’re not coming,” I say.

Lacinda glares at Demetros. “Yeah, we’re not going, are we?”

I can sense her anxiety after her last experience in the Dark Forest with the Zelon, and the last thing I want to do is to put my friends at risk. This is something I have to do alone, end of story.

“No. Absolutely not,” I say as I get to my feet and put the books about dark magic away.

Demetros and Lacinda stand.

“Ah, yes, we are,” Demetros firmly states.

I fold my arms as I stare at my stubborn friend. “Look, I appreciate the offer, but?—”

“Oh no, it wasn’t an offer.” He shakes his head and takes a step forward. “We’re coming with you. Or at least, I am. Lacinda, I totally get it if you don’t want to.”

She whacks him in the arm. “Oh, if you’re going, then so am I. We’ve got to have our girl’s back.”

I move forward and wrap my arms around my friends, more thankful than ever to have them. This is going to be a difficult task, to say the least, and I know I will need all the help and support I can get.

I head back to my quarters, in desperate need of some sleep. We agreed to meet outside the Dark Forest at first light tomorrow morning. I told them both if they decide to change their mind, I would understand, but they assured me they would be there. The thought of meeting the God of Death is pretty terrifying, and I decide to shove the thought to the back of my mind. The last thing I need to do is freak myself out any more than I already am.

What if harnessing the dark magic doesn’t go so well? What if it changes me? I shudder, shoving that thought to the back of my mind, too.

Stop thinking of the worst and focus on the outcome. Focus on Kyle, I tell myself, and it helps.

I round the corner toward my quarters and spot Amaros waiting outside my door. I stop, almost planning to turn and run before he spots me, but it’s too late as his eyes meet mine. He peels himself off the wall and waits expectantly.

I slowly walk to him, trying my best to hide my nerves, which I hope aren’t clearly visible on my face.

“Zarla, we need to talk,” he says, his tone serious.

I gulp. Crap, he’s figured out my plan.

“Can we talk in your quarters?” he asks, gesturing to my door.

I hesitate, unsure if I should be alone in my room at night with him, but then remember we’ve been alone in there before. I nod and open my door, moving aside for him to pass. After closing the door, I take a seat on the edge of my bed, and he follows suit, sitting at the end.

“So, what’s this about?” I ask, my voice cracking slightly. I clear my throat.

His expression is hard to read, and he simply stares at me. I glance away, needing to break the contact from his intensity before returning my gaze to his.

“Is there something you need to tell me?” he finally asks.

Oh no. He knows . What do I do?

He raises his brows at me.

“Um, no, I don’t think so,” I say.

He rubs the side of his face. “Finlay told me about Kyle.”

That bastard .

“So it’s true,” he says, scanning my face.

I let out a long breath. “That depends what he told you.”

He gets to his feet and then sits down right next to me. “Zarla, I need you to tell me the truth. Is Kyle an angel?”

I bite my bottom lip. “Maybe,” I say, and he gets to his feet and paces the room, “but it’s not my fault,” I quickly add. “I didn’t know. The gods bonded us together.”

He stops and stares at me. “Do you have any idea how dangerous that is? How dangerous angels from Zarquon are?”

I get to my feet, annoyed that he’s speaking of Kyle this way. “There’s nothing dangerous about him. I know him.”

He laughs, and it’s a sinister sound. “Are you serious? You don’t know him,” he says with a wave of his arm toward me. “You’ve barely been bonded to the male.”

He narrows his eyes, his jaw clenching, and I gulp. Does he know we’ve been intimate? Has he sensed it from me? I start to wonder what Finlay has told him.

He closes his eyes for a moment, taking deep breaths. “ How well do you know him?”

He doesn’t have to say the particular words for me to understand their meaning. He is asking if we’ve been intimate. How dare he. It’s none of his business. I raise my head higher as I stand my ground.

“Well enough,” I simply say.

His nostrils flare as his body tenses.

Oh no, he’s pissed.

He storms over to me, fists clenched at his sides, and I stumble back at his sudden movement. He stops far too close to my face, but I hold my ground. I’m sick of males, particularly my father’s guards, trying to intimidate me. I’m the King’s daughter. They have no right.

His grey eyes bore into mine, and then he kisses me. I’m so shocked at first I don’t move as he slides his hand behind my neck, pulling me closer. He parts my lips with his, and his tongue moves against mine. It feels good, better than it should. And then I snap out of it and shove him back, breathing hard. So that’s what this is about? He’s jealous?

He licks his lips as a sinister smirk spreads across them, and he takes a step closer. There’s a flare of anger in his eyes, and for the first time, fear trickles into my throat.

“Zarla…” he whispers, reaching up and stroking my cheek with the back of his hand.

His gaze drops to my lips, and I hope he doesn’t kiss me again. Amaros is a handsome male, but he’s been with my sister, and regardless of all of that, I think I’m in love with Kyle. The absence I feel in my heart when I’m away from him speaks volumes.

There’s a hunger in Amaros’s eyes, and I know his feelings for me are stronger than he lets on. So why has he been messing around with my sister? Surely he couldn’t have thought that would appeal to me. Unless I was never meant to know about it. Is that the kind of male he is?

He drops his hand to his side, his expression switching back to the more serious one I have learnt to expect. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have…” He abruptly walks to the door.

I don’t move until I hear the click of the door as it opens and then closes, and then I hurry over and lock it. My life is far too complicated already. Why did he have to go and kiss me? Gods above, how am I going to get to sleep now.

Guilt tugs at my chest, and I have to remind myself that Amaros kissed me, and I didn’t want him to. Did I?

I need to harness the dark magic and get back to Kyle. Fast.