Chapter 7

CHAPTER SEVEN

T he sun is setting in the skies above the Kingdom, but the orange and pink hues do little to uplift my mood, and I can't see the beauty in it like I usually do.

Amaros takes me back to my quarters, and I'm surprised when he stops in my doorway and doesn't follow me inside.

I draw my brows together as I stare at him, and he leans against the door frame.

"I will come in if you want me to. But something tells me you could use some space right now."

I gaze into my room, scanning the place that somehow feels cold and uninviting. Amaros is right—I need to be alone. My mood will only bring him down with me. Whether or not he cares about that, I do. I face him again and force a weak smile.

"Let me know if you need anything," he says, stroking my arm. "I'm here for you. Always."

I drop my focus to his hand, and he removes it before gently closing the door, leaving me alone with my thoughts.

The following week, I pour my energy and focus into protecting our Kingdom. All angels within Silanthia are on high alert to ensure no lost ones breach the borders. Harlum sent all seconds down to Earth to reinforce the guardians and seconds already down there. Our depleted defences spike my anxiety, but the attacks have been focused down on Earth, so it makes sense.

The younger seconds and guardians within the academy have started advanced training to prepare them for the possibility of an attack. They will become the new defence for our Kingdom if needed. I can only hope the Master can whip them into shape fast because there is a lot riding on them. It's a heavy burden for any young angel to bear, but we have no choice.

I'm stepping out of the shower when someone bangs on my door. Gods above, who the hell is that? I wrap my towel around myself and hurry to answer it. My hair is still wet, and water rivulets drip down my chest and back, puddling onto the floor.

I yank the door open to find Nilo breathing heavily, as if he's just run the entire way here. "Zarla, you have to see this!"

"See what?" I ask, growing impatient.

He sucks in a gulp of air. "Get dressed and meet me out front. Hurry!"

I close the door and quickly change into my leathers, use the towel to dry my hair as best I can, then run through the castle to find Nilo.

He's pacing around outside the main entrance, and his focus shifts to me when I approach. "Follow me."

Without giving me any explanation at all, he takes off into the sky. I roll my eyes and follow him. He flies over the castle grounds toward the Kingdom boundary, and as we near it, I see them. Zelons are spaced around the borders every sixty feet.

Wow. Keva did it. He really convinced the other Zelons to help guard the borders.

I catch up to Nilo, who hovers in the air above them, and their yelps sound out below.

"Isn't it incredible?" he says.

I'm speechless and just bob my head in agreement. I have never seen so many Zelons in all my life, and truth be told, I didn't realise there are so many within the Kingdom. There must be thousands of them.

Although my heart hurts at what's happened between Kyle and me, something about the Zelons' display of loyalty seems to ignite a fire within me. A smile spreads across my lips, and for the first time in a long time, I feel hope.

Cool drops of rain land on my face while I run across the grass toward the patio in front of the castle. The sun's beams warm my skin as I breathe in the floral scent in the air.

I love springtime in the Kingdom. The castle grounds come to life with flowers of every shade and scent. It's truly magnificent.

Amaros is waiting for me under the cover of an umbrella at a small glass table, a tray of tea and a spread of various foods arranged neatly for us to share.

We've spent a bit of time together lately. He's been there for me in a way I didn't expect. As a friend.

"Tea's getting cold," he calls out as I dash under the shelter and take a seat in the chair opposite his.

I roll my eyes, running my fingers through my damp hair, and slip my hands around the teacup. It's just cool enough to hold. Definitely not cold, by any standard.

"Did you hear about the Zelons?" he asks.

I take a sip and place my teacup back down. "Yeah, Nilo showed me earlier. I had faith Keva would deliver, but it was still a surprise. Had you any idea there were so many Zelons in the Kingdom?"

He shakes his head and takes a bite of a small pastry. The keepers in the castle are excellent cooks. This food is incredible.

"So, when do I get my own Zelon?" he asks, and I can't help but laugh.

He raises his brows. "What? It only seems fair."

What's got you all giddy? a voice sounds in my head. Finlay.

Not now, Finlay. I'll catch up with you later.

Fine. I'm just with the Zelons. I think I've found one for myself, actually.

I roll my eyes, and Amaros frowns at me.

"What's wrong?" he asks.

I can't hold the laugh that escapes my lips. These males are something. Of course they all need to have their own Zelons now after seeing how I have Keva.

"Finlay wants a Zelon, too," I explain, and he smirks.

Well, try to ride him and see if he likes you, I tell Finlay.

I think I'll wait until you get here, he says, and I laugh.

Amaros stares at me with piqued curiosity. "You never cease to amaze me."

My cheeks flush, and I glance down, picking up my teacup and finishing it. He's started doing that lately, complimenting me. At first, it bothered me, but now I don't mind as much. He's trying to mend our relationship, and I am going to allow him to, no matter how long it takes. I haven't told him about my memories coming back to me yet. I know that will be a hard conversation to have, and I don't want to risk our friendship again.

Something tells me it was always to protect me, nothing more. That he knew it would destroy me growing up, having witnessed my mother's murder, so he took the memory of it from me. And I'm feeling that he may be right and that he does really care about me.

"I hope that wasn't overstepping," he says, pulling me from my thoughts. "It's just, you're unlike any other female I have ever met."

"Thanks," I say and pop a chocolate truffle into my mouth.

Although spending time with Amaros has become enjoyable again, I can only handle so much of his compliments. I push my chair back and stand.

He frowns. "I hope I didn't upset you?"

Shaking my head, I swallow down the truffle. "No, nothing like that. I just promised the Master I would attend the academy training of the younger recruits. And I'm meeting Finlay after that."

"Oh," he says and gets to his feet.

Sensing I've upset him, I reach out and take his hand. "Thanks for this. We'll catch up later, okay?"

His focus drops to our hands, and he smiles. "Yeah, sounds good."

I release my wings and take off toward the academy, where I find the Master in the arena. There must be a few hundred angels training in here. I knew this place was huge but never imagined so many angels could fit in here at once, and this is only a fraction of them, too. I catch the Master watching me, his long grey hair pulled back in a bun on the top of his head as usual, and I hurry to his side.

"Zarla, thank you for coming," he says, dipping his head in greeting.

"Of course."

I scan the arena, surveying the recruits as they fight. They're not half bad, actually.

"Do you think they're ready?" I study his face as he watches them, curious to know what he's thinking.

These angels have been training here for years, but it's only been a few weeks since they upped their training to prepare for guarding the Kingdom.

The Master rubs his chin as if deep in thought. "Not yet."

I shift my focus back to the fight taking place on the mat before us. Two young males—although you wouldn't know they were young by the looks of them—are sparring. One is only slightly taller than the other, and they are both stocky males. The taller one rakes a hand through his red mane, trying to tame it, and fails. The other male readjusts his grip on his baton and shakes his head, sending his mop of black hair to the side and out of his eyes.

If nothing else, these males could do with a haircut.

"Zarla," the Master says, stealing my focus.

I look at him, and worry shines in his pale blue eyes, despite his best efforts to mask it.

"I know it's been a tough few months for you. A lot has happened within the Kingdom, most of which I wasn't aware of until after the fact. I must say, I am impressed with how you handled yourself. I knew you had the strength of your mother."

My throat constricts, and I swallow the lump down.

He reaches out and places a hand on my forearm. "I know it's a big ask, but these angels need guidance. Someone they can look up to. Someone they can trust. It would mean a great deal to me, and to them, if you could show your face around here a little more often. I see the respect they have for you, and I think it would go a long way."

I stifle a gasp. I never would have guessed that any of these angels would feel that way about me. Sure, learning I'm a goddess and defeating Hethenos probably sounds cool to them, but the reality isn't what they think it to be. She almost killed me, and if it hadn't been for my mother, I don't think I would be standing here right now.

I suck my bottom lip between my teeth as I mull over his request. I'm not some sort of mentor, if that's what he has in mind for me. Surely they could find someone better suited for that task.

He's waiting for an answer, and guilt gnaws away inside me at the thought of letting him down.

"Yeah, I guess I could do that."

He gives my arm a squeeze. "Brilliant."

"Zarla Quinn?" a soft voice asks.

I spin around to face a short redheaded female, her curls tightly bound and hanging down her back. She reminds me so much of Lacinda. A smile touches my lips as I look her over. She can't be much older than ten, perhaps.

"Hey, what's your name?" I ask.

She beams at me with a wide smile that takes up much of her face. "I'm Fraya. Is it true that you're a goddess?"

Before I can answer her, a bunch of other females rush over to join her, and they're all looking at me like I'm some sort of magical being or something.

"Is it really her?"

"Oh my gosh! It is!"

"We think you're amazing!"

I can't help but laugh. "Well, thank you. I hope you're all learning many new skills to help protect our Kingdom?"

They all nod enthusiastically, and the Master gives me a knowing smirk as if to say, I told you . I roll my eyes at him.

"Good. I'm sure we will all be much safer with you guarding the Kingdom," I tell them.

They giggle and run off, leaving me and the Master watching after them.

"You see? You have quite the fan base here."

I leave the arena feeling better about what the Master has asked of me. He was right. Showing my face there more often will help. If I can somehow give these young angels hope, then I have to do it. I can't imagine how scared they must have been when they learned of the lost ones getting into the Kingdom.

I fly toward the Dark Forest to find Finlay when his voice enters my mind.

Sorry, Zarla. Had to leave. My father was expecting me.

That's okay, I reply, we can find you a Zelon another time.

I swoop around and head back toward the castle.

Good. I am sure I have found the right one, but I'd rather you be there, just in case. It might bite my head off if I approach it.

I laugh at that. I highly doubt it, but it depends on if you offend it or not.

I don't think I'm an offensive angel, he says.

I scoff at that.

What? Everyone loves me.

I roll my eyes at his arrogance. Whatever you say, Finlay. I'll catch up with you tomorrow.

Take care.

I head for the balcony of my quarters when I change my mind and decide to visit Amaros. I have been enjoying spending time with him, and we have rebuilt some of the trust that was lost. Of course, I have many unanswered questions about his involvement with Hethenos, but I know I will be ready to ask about that soon.

I land with a soft thud on his balcony and cross towards the windows, but when I spot him with Astelle, I frown. He has her pinned up against the wall, kissing her with such passion it makes my heart ache.

What am I doing? I know I should leave, but I can't.

He reaches his hand down, slides it through the split in her dress, and then moves it between her legs. Her head falls back, seemingly enjoying his touch. He traces kisses down her neck before slipping the strap of her dress down, revealing her breast. He takes her nipple into his mouth, nipping at her delicate skin.

What are you doing? Just leave! I tell myself.

He then glides his hands down her thighs, gathers her dress up, and lifts her. She wraps her legs around his waist.

Finally, my shock breaks enough that I can move. I run to the edge of the balcony and dive off.

That lying bastard. How many times has he told me Astelle is nothing to him? He knows she tried to kill me. He acted as if he wanted to mend things with me. But that doesn't mean he wants to be with me. Gods above, what an idiot.

I make my way to the Great Library, needing a distraction. Suda is nowhere to be found, so I scan the aisles of books myself looking for anything about the lost ones. But no matter how hard I try, I can't get the image of Amaros and Astelle out of my mind.

I slam a book back into place and let out a frustrated grunt. Get it together already, I tell myself .

Then a book catches my eye. I step forward and gently pull it from the shelf. It's thick with a worn leather cover, but unlike most books in this place, it's not dusty. Someone has read it recently. I'm sure of it. I take it over to a nearby table and flip through the pages before an image jumps out at me. It looks just like a lost one. I read out the section next to the picture.

Once angels of the gods, lost ones are dangerous souls with whom there is no redemption. With no escape, they now reside in the Realm of Lost Souls for all eternity.

"Zarla?"

I jump as Amaros appears before me. His face is flushed, and it sickens me at the thought of why. I get to my feet and shove the book back onto the shelf, ignoring him completely as I leave the Great Library.

"Zarla, wait!" he calls out after me.

He grabs hold of my arm, and I shake him loose as I spin around to face him. I grit my teeth and glare at him.

His brows draw together, apparently confused at my reaction. "What's wrong?"

"Where were you just now? Before you came to find me?"

A knowing look crosses his features, and I can practically see his mind racing as he attempts to come up with a good enough lie.

He scratches the back of his head. "Oh, I was…ah… I was just with Harlum. Why's that?"

I shake my head and storm away from him. Bastard. He's seriously going to start with the lies again? After everything he's already put me through? And to think I was beginning to trust this male again. I mentally slap myself.

His hand wraps around my arm once more, but this time, he doesn't let go. I fight against his grip, but he manhandles me up against the corridor wall, pinning my arms up by my head.

"Zarla, stop!"

I breathe heavily through my nose while I glare at the lying bastard.

"I don't understand. What's wrong?"

I scoff. "Seriously? You're going to stand before me and lie to my face? Again?"

He closes his eyes as the realisation sets in that I know.

"You bastard! I saw you with her!"

"It isn't what you think."

I struggle against his grip, but he doesn't loosen it. "Really? I saw you two! It's exactly what I think it is. So you're still seeing her? After everything?"

"It's not like that. It's not what you're thinking. She's just a distraction, a bit of fun."

I grit my teeth. "Oh yeah? Why don't you ask Astelle if she thinks that's all it is? I should've trusted my instincts. I knew I couldn't trust you. Now let me go."

He shakes his head. "Of course you can trust me, Zarla! But I don't understand why this has upset you so much. I thought we were just friends."

I shake my head and bite the inside of my cheek. Arrogant asshole.

"Isn't that all we are? Friends?"

I don't miss how he has moved in closer, and I am annoyed at myself for enjoying his proximity. Even now, after what he's just been doing. Gross. What is wrong with me?

He releases one of my wrists and runs the back of his hand across my cheek. "You can trust me. Always."

I am sick of his lies, and I am sick of waiting to confront them. Rage builds inside me, and this time, I can't control it. I won't, not anymore.

"Oh yeah? I can trust you? Like how you never told me you were there the night my mother was murdered?"