14. ‘Shadow’

FOURTEEN

‘SHADOW'

ZOEY

Not sure how much longer I'm going to be able to calmly sit here with this jackass smirking at me. Something about this piece of shit makes me think I should know him, and in my profession, I always trust my gut. I'm racking my brain to try and fit his face, though I don't even know what I'm trying to do. When I hear a dark chuckle, I look at his face. This time it's me smirking. I might not be torturing him but he's not going anywhere either. He's on the specialized piece of wood that I had one of the guys from the sanctuary make for me. It's just wide enough to hold someone's waist against the width of it, but the arms and legs hang off the sides, which makes it very convenient to hang small weights off the wrists and ankles. My thought behind this type of torture is it's slow and extremely ball-busting painful. I should know, I designed the wood table pole, and the weights depend on if the person is in good shape or bad. What eventually happens to the asshole on the table is their shoulders can't handle the weight and they dislocate out of the sockets. This jagbag, Michael, I've got to give him some quiet kudos. Since I put the additional weight on a few minutes ago, not at any time since I started adding weights has he shown any sign of pain. I know he's experiencing it, even though he's trying to be as stoic as he can manage. Actually, as time goes by, it's starting to fucking piss me off.

"So guess you don't recognize me, do you?"

My head snaps back before I can control it. First thing a person must do in this type of situation is control all movement and emotions. Don't engage because then they have the upper hand. I know this, goddamn it, why did I react? So at this moment I decide if he keeps running his mouth, I'll use duct tape to keep his pie hole closed. Then my world shifts.

"Do they call you Shadow because of that thing on your face? Or is it because you move like a shadow in the night? Come on, tell me, Shadow, or should I call you by your real name? If I remember correctly, it's Zoey, right? Zoey De Luca, the daughter of Dario De Luca? He was your father, right? Is any of this coming back to you, bicha ? How about that cage remember how he kept you in it and only took you out for you to entertain his new friends?" The deeper rumbling sound of his voice immediately has my guard come up as goose bumps form on both of my arms. The baby hairs on the back of my neck are standing up. A reel of film starts rolling in my mind's eye and I can't stop it. Holy mother of God, no, this can't be happening? Not now. Fuck no. Then he starts to laugh and I lose it. My eyes skim the area until I find what I want. Moving like my name, I grab a six-inch Gordon Bowie knife in one hand and brass knuckles in the other. Michael is grinning like a lunatic as I approach him. His next words literally eradicate my soul.

"Do what you have to, Zoey, but you will never erase me from your thoughts or more importantly your nightmares. You and me are connected in so many ways, bicha slut. The way you obeyed me every single time I visited Dario, if not you paid because there are always consequences with your actions. Remember how I pounded that into your head literally. I'm sure you remember what bicha in Puerto Rican means right? Well, it appears at this present time our roles are reversed. Or are they? Let's see if you can give as good as I gave you back then."

I raise the hand with my Bowie and swing down across his chest. I'm not going super deep, just enough to make it burn. This is not going to be a one and done, it needs to last. I've done this enough my entire life in the Devil's Handmaidens so that I could do this all day and still he wouldn't die. Back and forth I find my rhythm and just keep at it. Blood is covering my front and Michael isn't laughing anymore, which is a good thing. So caught up in my never-ending nightmare, thanks to my dad, I never hear the door behind me open or my name being yelled out. One minute I'm swinging and the next I'm up against the wall. Fuck, wrong thing to do as I push off while swinging my body to the left then right to break away. I know deep down this person has no intention of hurting me. What they don't realize is my mind—no, my entire being—is back there in my past, not here in the present. I turn my body and swing my hand with the brass knuckles into their side. A solid kidney punch and whoever it is goes down with a hard thump. Fuck, when I see the red hair I know instantly it's Heartbreaker. Goddamn it, I think as I fling the knuckles off my hand and drop the knife.

Poor Heartbreaker is in agony. I can tell by the sounds coming out of her. It was a direct hit to her kidneys. Fuck, I need help immediately or my sister could die. I walk to the table and dial Goldilocks.

"Kind of busy, Zoey."

"Got a situation, one of our sisters is hurt. Need someone down here now. Michael is in some trouble also. I totally fucked up. I'll explain when you get down here."

I disconnect before she can ask her million and one questions, as usual. Yeah, I fucked up and not only that, I hurt a fellow sister. That's my main thought as I kneel next to Heartbreaker. When I glance up at Michael, he's still grinning as blood drips from every cut puddling on the cement floor below him. I don't give a damn about him. My concern is for my sister. The door to my wet room flies open with Raven, Rebel first, then Tink and Glory. Wildcat is behind them with Malcolm close by. When he sees his friend cut and bleeding, I watch him approach him, not thinking at all. Jumping up, I get between them, hands on Malcolm who tries to shrug me off.

"What the hell is wrong with you, Shadow? My God, he needs to get to a hospital. Help me get him down."

"Not gonna happen and he's far from dying. Believe me, Malcolm, if I wanted him dead, he'd be fucking dead. Malcolm, you don't know who this monster is so you need to relax and let me explain a few things to you about your friend, Michael."

Raven is on one side of Malcolm while Rebel is on the other, making sure the situation doesn't go south, I get that, though this time I made it go that way. Glancing around, I see Goldilocks/Tink watching me. I give her a head nod to the door and she understands. Just as I'm about to walk out, Michael starts screaming.

"Zoey, don't go. Come on, we were just getting started. I'm sure you've had years to think about me in your nightmares. Come on, slut, if this is the best torture you got then you didn't learn a thing from me years ago. Don't quit on me now, you filthy biker bicha ."

The room goes deadly quiet until Wildcat grabs a towel out of a cabinet and walks over to Michael, who has gone instantly quiet when she approaches. She stuffs the towel in his mouth, turns to Malcolm, and mouths, "I'm so sorry, Malty." His head drops as we walk out the door.

"Zoey, you know him? How? What's wrong? Come on, talk to me. I'm here. Please, you're scaring me. TALK TO ME, ZOEY, GODDAMN IT."

I look down and into her stunning green eyes filled with worry. It doesn't matter anymore; everyone knows what happened to me.

"Michael is the worst kind of sadist. I belonged to him for almost a year before Dario demanded I be returned back to him. I thought he was either dead or found a hole to hide in. Goldilocks, I'm sorry. You said not to touch him, but when he started poking at me, I just totally lost it. Had to poke him back and make it hurt. He's not going to die but he's gonna be in some severe pain. And shit, Heartbreaker, is she okay?"

"Hey, don't worry, we got this. Now take a few breaths, then we're going back in there and you're going to tell us exactly what, when, and how you know Michael. 'Kay?"

I nod as I lean against the hallway wall. My head is pounding and my insides are flipping all over. Dario and his demented ways and the choices he made for me will never go away. I'll never be free. No matter how hard I work at being a better human being. No, not better, just a human being.

One minute I'm covered in blood, looking at the faces of my club sisters, the next I'm wrapped up in arms around my waist. Wildcat is holding on tightly.

"Shadow, don't let this sick prick win. I don't know what he's been spewing to get in your head, but remember, like all of you have been telling me; whatever happened is in the past and you've moved forward. You've already won, sister, not him. His life is shallow and without love, friends, family, or anything that is important. I don't care what he was a part of, look at him now. It's all an act, he's petrified and knows he doesn't have his asshole ‘friends' to take his back. Those type of people, especially men, need to have others around to feel strong and in control of every situation. He's being controlled by you and you alone. I don't care if you kill him but make him suffer like he's never suffered before. Please, sister, do that for me and I'll owe you for the rest of my life. I'm not leaving but I don't have that in me, wish I did because with him it would be a pleasure. Like a once in a lifetime moment."

Looking down at my sister, who just had her past blow back and blast her, the fact she can worry about me speaks highly of who Wildcat is. No wonder she was on to being a great cop, she has the instincts. Need to talk to my dad, get him to fast-track her application. Timber-Ghost could use another good deputy. Maybe Wildcat and Yogi can pair up. Fuck, who would have thought two patched members from our clubs would end up on the police force. Life sure the hell plays some wicked games.

"Thanks, sister, you're right. I'll let him squirm in it, though his shit brought back a ton of things I've tried to forget. I will put him to ground but first, I think you and Malcolm should have your questions answered. Especially your man, sister, because he looks like he's losing his right arm which, in a way, he is. That motherfucker was so good that even Malcolm didn't see the evil lying right below the surface. Let me get cleaned up and have a word with Goldilocks and Glory. Not sure, but my ass might be in some serious trouble. I ignored my prez's command and went rogue. There are always consequences to my actions. Please tell Malcolm I didn't mean to disrespect him or you. To me, that jagoff, Michael, is as evil if not worse than my father Dario was. They walked in the same circles. Wildcat, don't believe his lies because he's had years to become the heinous human being he currently is. Something is seriously wrong with him because I know what he's part of, and I know he had a hand in what happened to the both of you. We'll talk soon, but for now, let's take a break from all of this. I'm getting the stink eye from Goldilocks, so gonna see what's got her looking at me like a crazy tiny lunatic."

I squeeze Wildcat's hands then walk toward the one person who saved my life so many years ago. It's been a while since I've lost control, and I can see the concern in Goldilocks's eyes. I mean, she's seen me at my most manic and insane moments to where I am right now. Sure, she doesn't want to see me take steps back. Fuck, neither do I. When I reach her, she is instantly in my space, arms around my waist. Damn, didn't think I was so huggable, for Christ's sake. But if I had to admit it, her tiny arms feel good right now.

"Don't play badass, Zoey, I can see your fear and worry, you can't hide from me. Please give it to me straight, how bad is it that we have Michael here? I can call Dad, Enforcer, and Wrench to get rid of him if you want me to. They'll make him suffer as much as you want. Don't let the dark pull you back, Zoey. I can't lose you, neither can the club. Not to mention your new life including Panther, Avalanche, and the guys at the ranch."

I've loved this tiny person since the first time she stuck up for me in that field years ago. She managed something no one else ever has in my entire life. Well, except Panther. She has a place in my heart because she's never let me down. Always has given me all her trust and support. Her worry and concern brought me back from where Michael was trying to drag me back to. I lean down and give her a kiss on the cheek, which has her jerking back. Yeah, I know, I'm not one who does all the touchy-feely shit. That would be tree-hugging, crystal-loving sister Taz, of course.

"Love you, Goldilocks. Always have and will 'til the last breath I take. Thank you for just being you. I won't let him win but for Wildcat, Malcolm, and me, it's got to be me who puts him to ground. Saying that, let's let him simmer a bit. I'll have Rebel work him over a bit, but don't want him dead yet. I get the feeling he has way too much needed information in his noggin about Dario and the Thunder Cloud Knuckle Brotherhood, along with the circuits associated with both. I thought Raven said she had a lead on a domestic situation or a small circuit of some kind between here and Bozeman, if I'm not mistaken. Once she gets the information, we'll have to move fast on it, so put that asshole on ice. Only water, no food or just the minimum to keep him alive. Limited options to speak either ball gag, rag, or tape. Keep his discomfort at peak levels. Whoever is left behind has to be someone who can fuck with someone or we get Enforcer or Wrench over here. With that said, are we good, Maggie? I know I fucked up and I'm sorry, Prez."

Her head jerks all the way back. Can't remember the last time I called her Maggie. The worry in her eyes turns her green eyes to an emerald pine tree color. She reaches up and grabs my cheeks.

"To you, Zoey, I'll always be Goldilocks. That's just ours. Or Prez, but never Maggie. When you use that name, I know you're pulling away and that I won't ever accept. You hear me, you badass motherfucker?"

That has me laughing out loud. Tiny and mighty. Maggie-Goldilocks-Tink is one of a kind. Talk about badass. She just told me in her no uncertain way that I'm all good and so are we. I give her a nod then walk back into the room and over to where Michael is still on my unique wood table ledge. Malcolm has checked out his cuts and even stitch three of the bad ones. I'm not gonna ride his ass 'cause he doesn't get this at all. Michael's eyes follow my every move. They get huge when I pull out a bottle of booze. He knows what I'm about to do because he's done the same thing to me and probably close to a hundred other women after he whipped us raw then, as he would say, he had to clean the marks we made him give us. So with that thought in my head, I open the bottle, walk over, and before Malcolm can grab my hand, I pour the liquor over all the cuts, small and large. Michael tries to scream but the rag keeps most of the noise down. When I pour the alcohol over the deepest one, I see his eyes roll and then he passes out. Or he wants us to think he did. I don't give a fuck and when I look to Malcolm, he stares at me for a moment then shakes his head. I see Wildcat come up behind him, grabbing his hand and pulling him so he turns, and they both walk out the door, never looking back at this asshole.

Me, on the other hand, I reach out and grab his balls, squeezing tightly until I hear the sound I want. A choking sound has me lifting my eyes to his, which are shooting flames my way.

"This is the prequel, Michael. There will come a time when you won't be able to talk or even moan your wish for death. That's when the real fun begins. I'm not doing this alone. Wildcat and Malcolm will help, along with Enforcer and Wrench. You might not know who they are, but believe me, you're gonna regret what you became associating with Dario. That I can promise you. Now I've got to go, but here's something to remember me by."

Then I squeeze his sack until his eyes start to bulge out. I give them an even hard press then quickly release. If I continue to do that, eventually cells will rupture and release toxins that will damage his liver and kidneys. That's when the real pain will start. I meant it, he's going to feel such pain he'll scream with agony to take his last breath. Only then will I be able to give Malcolm, Wildcat, and myself some peace when I put him to ground to rot for eternity.