19. Chapter 19

Chapter 19

Wayden

" I f I didn't have to go, I wouldn't go, but my brother is alone and…" Escala slapped Wayden on the shoulder, interrupting him.

"Go. My pack is not going anywhere. Go and take care of your brother. Family is important."

Yeah, family was important, but his family was just… Wayden shook his head, not wanting to get into it. He had a long way to go before he saw Ckson. He'd wait for the emotional rollercoaster when he got there.

"I'll see you soon," Wayden said. He turned to where Blaine was saying goodbye to the omegas. Wayden waited for him to finish before he walked to the shuttle. Blaine followed him a few minutes later and they were on their way.

Fuck. He couldn't believe he was doing this. Wayden gripped the controller as the emotions he'd buried deep inside him surfaced to choke him. Damn Ckson. Wayden never thought he would have to see his brother so soon after he'd sworn never to see him again.

"Are you okay?" Blaine asked, taking the passenger seat. "You seem a little tense."

"I'm… I'm fine." Wayden mumbled, hating that he was already becoming tense before he'd even seen Ckson. Being around his brother was a fucking chore. Wayden hated it. They drifted in silence for a while, and Wayden hated that too. He hated that he was letting Ckson control him… again. Growing up with an aggressive alpha wasn't the easiest thing in the world. They were moody, controlling and everyone tiptoed around them because God forbid someone offended them somehow. And he was going back there, to take care of him.

No one cared about how Wayden felt… no one. It felt like their childhood all over again.

"You know, I heard there are nice attractions on the southern part of the planet. Do you think we can stop at some of the places for a few minutes?" Blaine said. Wayden turned to stare at the omega. Blaine shyly looked away, causing Wayden's heart to beat fast. Fuck he loved it when Blaine looked all bashful. It looked good on him. "I mean we don't have to. I just thought…"

"We'll stop and go sightseeing. My brother can wait. It's not like he's dying or anything," Wayden said. Blaine gave him a strange look. "What?"

"You don't like him?" he asked softly.

"It's not like that. We just have a complicated relationship. He's… you'll see when you meet him," Wayden said. He didn't like badmouthing aggressive alphas, but fuck, his brother was a handful.

"I'm sure he's fine. You're a little weird too," Blaine said.

"What? What did I do?"

"You don't know?" Blaine's laughter filled the shuttle sending shivers down Wayden's spine. Wayden couldn't help but laugh too. "Are you sure you're not an aggressive alpha? Sometimes I can't tell."

"When have I ever behaved like an aggressive alpha?"

"Do you want me to remind you?" Blaine rubbed the side of his neck, reminding Wayden what he'd done. Wayden winced.

"That was…" Wayden said and then looked away. He stared at the airways, guilt burning his insides. "Sorry about that. It's… I shouldn't have done that."

"You've already apologised, Wayden. I forgave you. We moved on from there," Blaine said. "I didn't bring it up to make you feel bad. I was just…"

"I know. It's just not one of my proudest moments," Wayden said with a sigh. If he could turn back time, he would. He didn't even know what had gotten into him. He'd just… followed his instincts. Was that how his brother felt?

"Mine neither," Blaine said softly. He blinked rapidly and then smiled. Wayden wanted to reach out and touch him. "I'll look up interesting sights."

"I know of a place. It's a day and a few hours from here. We can start there," Wayden said. Blaine nodded, a wistful look in his eyes.

"I'm jealous of you," Blaine said. "You've travelled around the planet. You've seen a lot of things."

"Yes, I have. My work has taken me to many places. I've been to the original sites where our packs used to live and have done excavation work," Wayden said. "That was exciting. It was like uncovering lost treasure."

"Did you find any?"

"No," Wayden said with a laugh. "There were a few packs who showed signs that they were more affluent than others though."

"Tell me more." Blaine turned in his seat to face him. The excitement in the omega's face did things to Wayden. And without even thinking about it, Wayden found himself telling Blaine about his research and the places he'd been, which made Wayden long to take the omega with him on his next fieldwork trip. Would Blaine agree if he asked him? Would he go with him?

Wayden glanced at Blaine. They hadn't spoken about what was happening between them. Wayden had wanted to talk about it, but he got scared every time. The very thought of his heart breaking all over again scared him. Wayden wanted to trust Blaine. He wanted to trust what they had. Something so beautiful couldn't be bad, Escala had said that. Ambrose came to mind and Wayden knew there was no guarantee. Ambrose had been the sweetest omega he'd ever met. Wayden had never thought that Ambrose would betray him.

Fuck.

Wayden gripped the controllers tight and tried not to think of the worst. Blaine was different. He wasn't like Ambrose. He wouldn't… No. Wayden had to trust his feelings. He wasn't going to allow his past to control his future. He wanted Blaine. That meant he had to be brave. He had to put his heart on the line in order to love again.

"Is something wrong?" Blaine asked. "You stopped talking."

"Did I?" Wayden asked with a tiny laugh. "I was just thinking."

"About what?" Blaine innocently stared at him.

"How I feel about you," Wayden said. Blaine visibly jerked. He turned to face the front. Wayden reached for his hand. "This is just about how I feel, Blaine. You don't have to say anything or feel anything. I'm just… I want to tell you how I feel."

"I…" Blaine started.

"No, just listen. I need to do this while I'm still brave or I'll never do it," Wayden said. "I love you, Blaine. I fell in love with you. I don't know how it happened. One minute I couldn't stand you and the next I wanted to be close to you. I want to see where this thing between us will go. I know it's too soon and we haven't talked about what's happening between us. We didn't exactly start the way a normal couple would. But I think things are good between us… perfect, actually. I love being with you. I know you might not feel the same. I just… wanted you to know." Wayden glanced at Blaine, waiting for Blaine to say something. Even though he'd told Blaine he didn't have to say anything, Wayden kind of wanted to hear how Blaine felt about him.

Don't push, Wayden told himself. He let go of Blaine's hand and turned to look at the airway. They drifted in silence. When it was time for lunch, Wayden set the shuttle into auto-drift, and they went to prepare lunch. He watched Blaine silently move around the cooking station, preparing their food. He looked shocked out of his mind. Maybe Wayden shouldn't have told him yet. Maybe it was too soon. Fuck. Wayden didn't know. Blaine was so complicated. Wayden couldn't figure him out. And that's what scared Wayden the most.

"Come here," Wayden told Blaine.

"What? Why?" Blaine said staring at him.

"Okay, I'll come to you," he said getting up. He rounded the counter and pulled Blaine into his arms. "I didn't tell you I love you for you to act funny."

"I'm not acting funny," Blaine grumbled, but he wrapped his arms around Wayden. "I'm scared. I don't know if I can trust you."

"What?" Wayden pulled back to stare at Blaine.

"It's not you. It's the way I am. It's hard for me to trust alphas. I don't know if I can put myself in a position where I'll be vulnerable. It's not even about you its…" Tears filled Blaine's eyes. Blaine tried to blink them away, but they spilled over, rolling down his cheeks.

"Shhh… it's okay." Wayden pulled Blaine back into his arms and held him tight. Had some alpha hurt him?

No. Please, no. Wayden's arms tightened around Blaine. He wished he could take the pain of whatever had happened to him away. Wayden's heart broke as Blaine cried harder. The whimpering sounds ripped Wayden's heart to shreds, leaving him feeling helpless and a little guilty for treating Blaine the way he had when they'd first met. He should have known that Blaine's hostility wasn't unfounded. Wayden knew there were cruel alphas out there. A lot of omegas suffered because of them. Wayden rubbed his hands down Blaine's back, trying his best to give him the comfort he needed.

After a while, Blaine stopped crying. The omega leaned his head on Wayden's shoulder, his body limp. Wayden picked him up.

"What are you doing?" Blaine asked tiredly.

"Taking you to bed. You've cried yourself out." Wayden walked into his room and placed Blaine on his feet. He turned to the bed and pulled the covers open for him. "Lie down."

"Thank you," Blaine said as he lay down. He looked up at Wayden shyly. "Sorry about that. I don't know what came over me. I've never cried like that."

"You don't have to apologise. Get some rest," Wayden said. He turned to the door to walk out of the room but stopped when Blaine spoke.

"Stay with me," Blaine said softly. Wayden got under the covers and pulled Blaine into his arms. Blaine sighed as he buried his face into Wayden's chest. "Give me time, please… please."

A lump formed in Wayden's throat as emotions overwhelmed him.

"I'll do more than that, baby. I'll earn your trust. I'll be the alpha you need. Just promise me one thing," Wayden said.

"What?"

"When you figure out your feelings and realise that you don't love me, let me down gently. Remember that I have a heart too, and it breaks just the same as yours. Remember that I swore that I would never fall in love or let myself be vulnerable again, but I'm opening myself to you because I want you. I want to be with you, even if my heart breaks. My love for you is bigger than my fear and my past pain."

"Okay," Blaine said.

"Okay. Now go to sleep. Everything will seem better once you get some rest," Wayden said. Blaine sighed, burrowing into him. For someone who didn't trust him, Blaine was comfortable enough with him to sleep in his arms.

That had to be a good sign, right? Blaine wouldn't seek comfort from him if he didn't trust him just a little bit.

Wayden hoped it was a good sign. They could be amazing together. He vowed that he was going to show Blaine just how much. And in the coming days Wayden did just that. Their trip home turned into a romantic getaway that Wayden wished would never end. They stopped at all the sights Blaine found along the way. They walked hand in hand on purple sand, climbed the tallest hill, watched shooting stars streak the night sky, kissed under the twin moons, made love for hours, until all Wayden could hear were Blaine's moans of pleasure.

Every day was an adventure. Wayden couldn't get enough of Blaine's beautiful smiles, excited screams and thirst for knowledge. The omega's excitement was contagious. Wayden found himself smiling for no reason, and he felt like a young alpha on his first crush. He followed Blaine everywhere. He was enchanted, taken… totally obsessed with Blaine. Wayden had never thought he would fall in love like this. Never.

"This is beautiful," Blaine exclaimed as he looked up at him.

"Yes, it is," Wayden said, the field of wildflowers forgotten. Wayden pulled Blaine close and slammed their lips together. Blaine moaned into his mouth, clinging to him as if he would never let go. Wayden cherished these moments when Blaine's emotions slipped through, when he didn't hide behind his fear, and he just let himself be. The moments gave Wayden hope and encouraged him to do more, to love Blaine even more. He kissed Blaine harder and deeper, claiming him the only way he could - with a kiss. Blaine leaned into him for a second, giving himself to the kiss before he wiggled away.

"We only have a few minutes here and I want to explore," Blaine said, turning to the field.

"Go," Wayden told him. "You can take as much time as you need. I'm not in a hurry to get home."

Blaine gave him a strange look again, before walking away. He'd been giving Wayden that strange look whenever Wayden told him he wasn't in a hurry to get home. Which Wayden wasn't.

"Go," Wayden repeated, not ready to explain to Blaine how he felt about going home to see his brother.

Blaine nodded and walked to the field. He moved around the field, picking flowers like an excited cub on his first outing. Blaine looked so happy and carefree that Wayden wanted to watch him. Wayden spotted a boulder a few paces away. He walked to it, sat down, and leaned his back on it so he could comfortably watch Blaine as he moved from one flower to another – inspecting each one with enthusiasm and interest.

"Don't pick the whole field. We don't have room in the shuttle," Wayden shouted with a laugh.

"I won't," Blaine shouted back. A few minutes later Blaine ran back to him, a bouquet of flowers in his hand. "What are you doing?" he asked.

"Watching you," Wayden responded, making Blaine blush. "Are you done?"

"Yes," Blaine said. "We should get going. Your brother is waiting."

Wayden swallowed a groan. He didn't want to think about Ckson right now. He was feeling good and happy for the first time in a long time. Thinking about Ckson would only bring him down and he wanted to enjoy this moment with Blaine. He didn't know when Blaine would make his decision, and all of this would come to an end. Wayden shoved the negative thought away, focusing on the positive.

He got to his feet and took Blaine's free hand. Hand in hand they walked back to the shuttle where Wayden took Blaine to his room.

"We really don't have time for this," Blaine said, but he dropped his flowers and let Wayden help him out of his clothes.

"You smell like flowers," Wayden said, ignoring Blaine's words. He picked up Blaine and placed him on the bed. He ran his hands down Blaine's body and gripped his cock. "I couldn't wait to touch you like this."

"We had sex two hours ago." Blaine moaned arching into him.

"I know," Wayden said, taking Blaine's mouth in a deep kiss. Blaine opened to him, submitting to Wayden in the sweetest way, and it drove Wayden crazy. It made him want to claim Blaine over and over, until there was no doubt to whom he belonged. Wayden flipped Blaine onto his stomach and was inside him in seconds. Blaine's hole squeezed around him so tightly that Wayden gritted his teeth to keep from coming. He gripped Blaine's hips and made slow sweet love to him, until they came.

"I love you so much," Wayden said, holding Blaine tight. Wayden longed to hear Blaine say he loved him too, but he shoved that longing away. He had Blaine in his arms. This was enough.