13. Leo

Normally, I go through two or three days of uncomfortable preheat symptoms before my heat comes. My need for sex is something that blooms slowly, amongst my need for touch. It's something predictable and constant, like the rise of hunger or thirst, not something that spikes out of nowhere.

The sudden arrival of my heat is like a punch in the gut. My skin chafes at the fabric of Steve's shirt, even though it's loose. The stitching along the neckline and across the shoulders is unbearably scratchy. The counter is cold and hard underneath my belly. My body aches to be filled, even though Steve is deep inside me.

It isn't just my body, either. My heart aches. That's always the worst part of my heat. I yearn for an emotional connection to my alpha that's as deep as his cock. I hate that desperate desire for love. It's worse than the skin sensitivity, high libido, or fatigue. Most of the time I can convince myself that I don't need anyone to love me. Not even my dads. But during my heat, the loneliness in my chest becomes an unbearable chasm. Tears leak from my eyes, just like slick leaks from my ass. I'm nothing but a mess of bodily fluids and need.

"Hey, are you okay?" Steve asks.

I shake my head.

"What can I do to make it better?"

It's all so overwhelming, I can't answer. I just burst into sobs. One second Steve was fucking me into oblivion, and now he's looking at me like I'm a ceramic doll that might break. No alpha could possibly think this is sexy. What if he changes his mind about me? Dave hated my heat. He threatened to hire someone to "take care of it" the following spring if we were still together. He emphasized the "if" like he found the idea implausible.

Steve withdraws from me. Slick and cum gush from my hole. I'm horribly empty now.

"No," I whisper. "Don't go."

"I'm not going anywhere. But I'm sure this countertop doesn't feel good. How about I take you to the couch or my bed?"

I nod. "Okay."

"You look like you want to take that shirt off." He points to where I'm pulling on the collar of the shirt I stole from his closet. I didn't realize I was doing that.

"It hurts," I say.

He grabs the shirt by the shoulders and lifts it over my head. "Your heat came on suddenly. That can't feel good." He tosses the shirt onto the floor. "Do you want to walk or would you like me to carry you?"

I lean forward and curl my arms into my chest. My forehead collides with his collarbone.

He chuckles. "Okay. That's one way of answering." He twists me around and hooks an arm underneath my knees and neck. Being lifted is uncomfortable and wonderful at the same time. I get a little motion sick as he carries me over to the couch, but I also feel cared for.

He sets me down in the pile of blankets I collected on the couch. "This is a nice little nest."

Something primal within me likes his compliment. I wriggle my body underneath one of the blankets—not because I'm hot, but because it makes me feel safe.

"We could stay here for a while," I say. "Just you and me."

He smiles. "Okay."

"This isn't my house, but I set up these blankets, so this space is mine," I explain.

Steve runs his fingers through my hair, brushing it out of my face. "Do you usually like to be home during your heat?"

I nod. "It's safer."

"That makes sense. Does this area feel safe enough? Or do you want me call a driver to take us back to your place?"

I wrap my arms around his body and pull him closer to me. His naked skin against mine is exactly what I need. "We can't leave. I'm leaking everywhere."

He chuckles. "Fair enough."

"I'm not smart during my heat," I warn him. "Brain fog. And sadness. I am very sad during my heat. I wish someone would care about me. I am so sad that no one does."

Somewhere in the fog of my mind, I know I've said too much. Alphas don't like it when you complain. They like smiles and yeses and dry eyes.

Steve presses a kiss to my cheek. "I care about you, Leo."

"But my heat isn't fun. Alphas like heats that are fun."

He brushes his nose against mine, making my skin spark at the gentle touch. "You are fun, Leo. Your heat is just a few days a year. If it's awful, we'll deal with it together. But I bet you and I can have a good time." He slides his hand between my thighs. It's slippery there and incredibly sensitive. "You told me I could breed you, remember?"

I shiver at the idea of it. "Now?"

"Not yet. I have to open you up first. Will you let me open you up?"

I relax my legs. Steve pushes my knees up, and lines his cock up with my entrance. "Relax, okay?"

I'm so loose from my heat that I can take him without any discomfort. He tilts his hips, and then he's brushing against the mouth of my womb.

"Yes. Right there," I say.

He rocks his hips gently, putting pressure on that sensitive part of my body with the tip of his cock. It's like he's massaging a live wire inside my body. I shake my head, overwhelmed with sensation.

"Do you want me to stop?" he asks.

"No. Please no."

He jerks his hips up, jabbing into it. I whine and move my hips with him, needing more sensation.

"Oh, fuck, Leo. I can feel it loosening."

He grinds the tip of his cock against it. I throw my head back and grip his shoulders tight.

"Harder. I need it harder."

"I don't want to hurt you," he says.

"Please."

He snaps his hips up, slamming into it. I can feel it loosening too, opening up for him. He eases back and rams into it again. This time, I move my body in time with his, and we snap our hips together. It hurts, but I need the hurt now.

"More," I beg.

Instead of the brutal thrusts from before, he goes back to rocking his hips gently, grinding his cock against the wildly sensitive opening. All I can do is lie there, desperate for more. He grasps my cock and pumps it. I'm unprepared for the extra sensation. My body seizes up with pleasure, my ass clamping down on him. I scream, scraping my nails across his back.

Steve sinks his teeth into the flesh of my shoulder and pumps into me in quick succession. His body trembles as he comes, filling me with his hot seed.

Without any finesse, he pulls his cock out and flips me around, pushing my chest into the soft pile of blankets. I'm naked and presenting for him now, my ass up and dripping with slick. He thrusts into me all in one go. I groan. From this angle, he's bigger. He pushes my hips down and then fucks into me again, this time jabbing into that sensitive spot.

I can feel him forcing me open, little by little. It's painful, but I need it. I rock back into him, our bodies in a blissful synchronicity. I'm so lost in pleasure, I forget to be sad, and I forget about the brain fog.

I forget about everything but his dick and how badly I need him to breed me.