Chapter 21

21

SCARLETT

I 'd gone to Eli's last night to talk to him about our fight. I wanted to get some clarity. But it seemed like Eli was fine, and he was ready to move on. Apparently, our relationship was merely a learning experience for him.

I couldn't get over the fact that he'd said he loved me but was okay with walking away after one disagreement. Our relationship was supposed to be temporary, but something changed for me. I wanted more, but now I wasn't sure where I stood with Eli.

It almost seemed like he was okay with me leaving. He'd already made plans to build a house and fill it with kids. That shouldn't have hurt because we never discussed doing that together, but it did.

I should have been focused on preparing for our performance. Guests were starting to arrive, and the backstage was pure chaos. Kids walked around in various states of dress, chasing each other with tree branches, squealing and laughing.

I should have reprimanded them, told them to be serious about their first performance. But I couldn't. This was how theater should be for kids. It was fun and light. The kids were performing in front of a large audience for the first time and needed to get the energy out.

I gathered the adults and directed everyone to different stations so we could get the kids dressed and into hair and makeup, then hand them any props they needed for the first scene.

The sets on stage looked amazing. The Fletchers had done a phenomenal job, and it didn't feel like a kids' production.

As it got closer to start time, I encouraged the kids to drink and eat a snack. I was familiar with how often they needed to eat at this point, and I didn't want anyone to be hungry on stage.

Finally, when the lights dimmed, I moved onto the stage in front of the curtain.

"I want to thank everyone for coming tonight. This is an original play, The Magical Forest, written by Marigold Fox and directed by yours truly. The kids worked really hard the last few weeks, so please silence your phones. Photography and filming is encouraged." This was a kids' production after all.

With a bright smile, I moved off the stage and nodded toward Eli who slowly opened the curtains.

John was frozen in place, and Emma nudged him, whispering the first line to him. His eyes cleared, and he said his first line a little too loud. There were a few laughs in the crowd, but otherwise I was happy he recovered.

I moved off to the side so I could watch the kids as they came on and off the stage. I was quick with encouragement and to remind them to eat and drink on breaks. Marigold escorted kids to the bathrooms. It was a well-oiled machine. I was familiar with how these things worked but wasn't sure it would be the same with kids.

It was nice to work closely with Eli. He was quick with a smile and a nod in my direction. But I couldn't understand why he wasn't upset I was leaving tomorrow.

I focused on the play and tried not to think about how I had to get on a plane early tomorrow morning. Marigold had agreed to drive me to the airport. Chance was working, and my parents were going to the farmers market. It was as if nothing would change when I left.

No one seemed upset. It was as if no one expected me to stay, and they were okay with me leaving. The problem was, I wasn't so sure I was okay with it anymore.

The quicker we moved through the scenes, the tighter the vice on my chest felt. When the play was over, so too would be my time in Telluride. I never wanted to stay before. I was always eager to see the world, meet new people, but now my heart ached at the idea of leaving everyone behind.

I couldn't ignore the biggest draw of all—Eli Wilde. I'd never felt a bigger connection with anyone, and I'd screwed everything up.

He'd bought the building so I could host my play in it. He saved it from being turned into a restaurant. It was a sweet gesture even if it was a bit overbearing. I'd never had any man do something so over-the-top for me, and I was leaving it all behind.

He'd probably sell the theater when I was gone or, worse, hire someone to replace me. Would she be better for him? Would she be a city girl looking for a small town to settle into? Would she fit in like I never did?

After the kids took their final bows, Eli forced me onto the stage to a standing ovation. I wondered if I'd miscalculated my influence here. Afterward, I stood in the lobby talking to everyone, clutching one of the bouquets of flowers I'd been given.

Parents expressed their gratitude that I'd brought theater to the kids. It hurt that I had to walk away from this. I could see myself hosting year-round classes, seasonal performances, and even camps in the summer.

Would Eli had given me free rein with the theater? That was a sense of freedom I'd never experienced in a production before. Why hadn't we talked about the possibilities the other night? Instead, I'd shut him down. I'd gotten defensive, assuming the worst of him.

I should tell him before I leave. Tell him I was an idiot. But I wasn't sure it mattered any more. Eli was full of smiles tonight.

Finally, he clapped his hands then whistled to get everyone's attention. "We have a surprise in the auditorium if everyone will come back inside."

No one questioned it, just filed back into the auditorium. Once I moved past the doors, everyone yelled, "Surprise!" There was a huge banner under the balcony that read Good Luck, Scarlett. This was my going-away party. My mouth was dry. Everyone was here. The whole town, my family, Eli, and his family.

Everyone stopped by to wish me well. There was even talk about who would take over the theater now that I was gone.

It shouldn't have bothered me, but I couldn't even draw in a deep breath due to the pain shooting through my chest. It was as if I was easy to replace. I wasn't wanted or needed here. It was what I'd always feared. But now that it was a reality, I wasn't sure what to do. I didn't feel that same urge to run.

I wanted to burrow into this town and make myself part of it. But that wasn't the plan. It didn't even sound like that was what anyone else wanted.

It was too late to change my mind. I'd already signed up for the new play. They were expecting me on set tomorrow. I couldn't let them down.

"She's going to do amazing things," Eli said to someone and then moved toward me. "She'll have to let us follow her travels on social media."

I nodded, unable to talk to anyone. Usually people made comments about me coming back, but this time, no one did. It was as if they were used to me coming and going and didn't care one way or another if I stayed .

I swayed on my feet, remembering that I hadn't eaten since lunch. There was food at a nearby table, but I couldn't eat. My stomach cramped. I had to get out of here. There was the urge to run. I slipped out without anyone seeing me and walked to my car. I drove to my condo for the last time.

Everything was packed and ready to go. I even had my airplane outfit carefully folded on top of my dresser. Tomorrow, I'd be staying in a motel in some town in Tennessee where I didn't know anyone. It didn't feel as good as it used to.

It felt lonely, isolating. Why was I leaving when I had so many friends and family here? I'd made more connections with the community the last few weeks than I had my entire life. In the past, I was so eager to get out, I never bothered to make deep connections.

I screwed everything up, but there was nothing I could do. I poured a glass of wine, then headed to the rooftop deck. There were so many memories here: when we planned the play, dancing around our attraction in the hot tub, making love in the cabana, and waking up to the sunrise. Would I have moments like that with anyone else?

It hurt to even think about it. I sat by myself and drank my wine. I half expected Eli to appear, but he didn't.

Instead, I got pictures of Marigold at the bar with Chance and the Wilde brothers. Eli was in the background, talking to someone. I couldn't see if it was another woman. I didn't want to know. I didn't have a claim to him anymore. He was done with me, and I didn't blame him.

When my eyes began to droop, I returned to my room, listening for any sound of Eli coming home. I never heard his door. Any time I drifted off, I'd jerk awake, wondering if he was with someone else. I punched the pillow with the intention of fluffing it up, then flopped back down. How could he move on so easily?

I finally fell asleep, feeling sorry for myself. My alarm went off at the crack of dawn. No one would be awake at this time of day. My parents hadn't planned to see me off this time, and Chance was already at work.

Marigold was waiting for me in front of the lodge. I threw my small suitcase in the back of her car. I was used to traveling light, but I almost wished I had more things to bring with me.

When I got in, she handed me a coffee with a bright smile. "Are you excited about Tennessee? I can't wait to see videos of your performance."

Marigold didn't bother waiting for an answer. She kept up the chatter all the way to the airport. When we were there, she got out to give me a hug. "I'd better get going. Eli wanted to set up interviews for the new theater director today."

A sharp pain went straight through my heart. "I didn't realize you were replacing me so soon."

Marigold nodded eagerly. "Eli's excited to keep the theater going."

"And he's going to be involved?" I asked, carefully lifting the handle of my suitcase. I should go. I couldn't handle this conversation so early in the morning, especially without any sleep.

"He said he caught the theater bug, and he loved seeing those kids on the stage. Thank you for getting it off the ground. I know we'll find the right person for the job."

I was replaceable. No one needed me. I nodded miserably. "I'll miss you."

Marigold waved me off with a bright smile. "You'll forget about us as soon as you land. Onto the next show, right?"

Wow, that hurt more than I thought it would. "It's not like that."

Marigold tipped her head to the side. "You don't have to worry about us. We're going to be fine. I have the new play to start planning."

I should have been the one planning the next production with Eli and Marigold. Instead, I was leaving. But this was what I always wanted. No one to bother me when I left. Now that I had it, it didn't feel so good.

Marigold was already walking to the driver's side door. "Have a safe flight."

It was so generic. Something you'd say to anyone. And then there was her comment to not worry about keeping in touch. I'd ruined our friendship, and there was nothing I could do to fix it. The damage was done.

I went inside, forcing myself to put one foot in front of the other. I printed my ticket and headed through security.

It was a routine I went through all the time. But it felt more final somehow. By my next visit, everyone would have moved on.

Marigold might have found someone she could be in a relationship with. Eli would be working with a new theater director. He might even be living with a woman in his new house.

My parents and my brother had already written me off. They didn't even pressure me to come back for the holidays. They assumed I'd be busy with the new production and told me not to worry about it.

I sat at my gate, wondering what had changed. I kept coming back to Eli. He was the difference. He was the one who showed me how amazing Telluride was and that I fit in. I always had. I was just too busy running away to connect with anyone.

I loved Eli, and I wanted more for myself than motels in a new town every few months. New lines to memorize. New cast mates to get to know. More bars to hang out in. It was a lonely, empty life. Why had I ever thought my life was full? I couldn't drum up any excitement for my future in Tennessee.

The announcer came over the loudspeaker to say my flight was on time. I let out a breath. This was the life I'd chosen. I wanted to travel around and act. But I couldn't deny the satisfaction and joy I got from teaching those kids.

They'd grow up without me to guide them. I was sure someone else would love them as equally as I did. But I didn't want someone else directing the kids' plays in Telluride. I wanted to be the one.

What had I done? I'd already committed to being in Tennessee. I didn't have a choice. I had to fulfill my commitment. Maybe when this play was done, I'd figure out what to do about my life in Telluride.