45. Wildflower

45

Wildflower

You Deserve Everything, Dahlia.

"Looks like a rock-solid case. Tax fraud, felony embezzlement, and a fuck ton of forgery," Ryan says, stepping out of his car and meeting Everett and me in the driveway.

The low bass of music pounds beneath our feet, evidence of the raging party going on out back. Darby and Leo's reception is completely wild.

Everett and I took a trip to my storage unit earlier this morning, where I put together a box of Lou's old toys and dropped them at a donation center on our way home.

But as far as the police are concerned, I was grabbing table linens for the wedding and stumbled across an odd thumb drive I didn't recognize. After opening it up at home, I saw several concerning documents belonging to my father's business, and I thought it best to report them to Ryan and get his opinion.

Upon seeing the evidence, it was his duty to turn the files into the police.

"They're on their way to the local authorities in Crestwell, where the business is licensed. It'll take a few days to process, but I'm guessing official charges will be brought against him for at least tax fraud and felony embezzlement."

I let out a deep breath. "When do you expect the warrant will be issued?"

Ryan shrugs. "I expect it to happen very quickly."

Everett's arms tighten around my waist as I fall into him, letting out all the tension I'd been holding in. We head around the side of the house and enter the backyard. The reception rages on with lights, music, and dancing.

The ceremony was beautiful, taking place right at sunset on a crystal-clear day. The backyard was immaculately decorated, in white, green, and yellow florals, Darby and Leo saying their vows against the backdrop of the ocean.

My sister opted to walk herself down the aisle, but she only made it halfway before Leo ran out to meet her at the center of it, pulling her into his arms and kissing her before they even had the chance to say, ‘I do'.

The reception was just as lovely. Everett and I both gave speeches. I opted for heartfelt, whereas he opted for funny, ending with a video of Leo doing a humiliating sandwich chain commercial several years ago, which is apparently the best way to embarrass him. Leo then spent the next several hours getting pleasantly drunk, my sister right along with him.

Now, they move around the dance floor to ‘Teenage Dream' by Katy Perry, an alarmingly fitting anthem for the two of them. My sister looks fuller of life than I've ever seen her. Lou spins in circles with Carlos while Monica chats with August on the edge of the dance floor, smiling at her husband and my daughter.

Elena didn't stay long after dinner, claiming she was tired, though she did give Darby and Leo a surprisingly thoughtful wedding gift before she left.

I realize Everett and Ryan are chatting quietly next to me when Ryan pats him on the back and steps off the porch, heading toward the cake table. "Oh, and Dahlia," he turns around, "is there any chance your mother could be involved in all of this?"

"I doubt it. He didn't think highly enough of women to let them be involved, though that's probably to my mother's benefit now."

Ryan nods. "You might want to give her a heads up, then. They'll probably look into her anyway, and it might help if she's prepared."

"Okay, thanks." I force a smile as he walks away.

"He's probably right." Everett wraps his arm around me, tugging me against his chest. "You could have Darby call her, though, if you don't feel up to it."

A sense of dread washes through me at the thought of talking to my mother. It's not the same kind of fear that comes with my dad, but the pain associated with her is still its own hurt. She was the first one to make me feel like I wasn't enough. Not pretty or thin enough. Not smart or accomplished enough. Not kind or poised or popular enough. She's the one who cared all too much what others thought, and other people always thought I stuck out like her sore thumb. Her black sheep. Her lost cause.

"No. She doesn't need that kind of pressure on her honeymoon." I step out of his arms, raising onto my toes to press a kiss to his cheek. "You go have fun. I'll be back in a minute."

"You're going to call her right now?" he asks.

"Might as well." I shrug. "I've still got some champagne in my system. Liquid courage and shit."

Everett lets out a laugh, shaking his head. "I can come with you."

"It's okay. You go," I urge. "I'll be right out. I promise."

"I love you, Dahlia." He takes my hand, brushing his lips across my knuckles. "No matter what your mother says to you in there, when you come back out, I'll be waiting, and I'll still love you. I'll still think you're the best thing that has ever happened to me."

My mind and heart and soul scream at me to say the words back to him, knowing I've never meant anything more. But they get lodged inside my throat, and all I'm capable of is offering him a smile, turning to head inside the house.

The music lowers to a dull roar as I shut the door behind me, running up to my bedroom and grabbing my phone off its charger. Scrolling through my contacts, I select my mother's name and press call. It's late here, even later in Kansas, which might be the reason why I pulled the trigger so soon, secretly hoping she won't answer but being able to say I tried to warn her.

She does pick up, though, on the third ring.

Her groggy voice echoes in my ear. "Dahlia?"

"Hey," I say lamely, unsure how to address her.

"Oh my goodness," she gasps. I hear rustling on the other side of the line. "You're actually calling me. Is everything okay?"

"Not really," I mutter. "Um. Is Dad near you at all?"

"No. I–I'm, uh… Well, no. He's not here."

"Are you lying to me?" I find myself asking.

"No, Dahlia. I promise I'm not lying to you." For some reason, I believe her. I think I mostly believe her, because if my father had been in bed beside her when I called, he'd have already taken her phone to speak with me himself.

"Look, Darby and I thought it'd be best if we—"

"Today was the wedding," she interrupts.

"Yeah." I swallow. "She's still enjoying herself, which is why I'm the one calling."

"How was the ceremony?" my mom asks.

"Beautiful." I sigh, deciding to throw her a bone. "It was lovely. She looks stunning."

"I don't doubt it." It's almost as if I can hear her smile. "I'm sure you look stunning too."

I want to snort at that, but I choke it back.

"Is she happy?" my mother continues.

"She's very happy."

"And you… Are you happy?"

Chocolate brown eyes and steady, tattooed hands flash across my vision, bringing a smile to my face, one I know she can hear in my voice when I say, "I'm happy."

"Good," she breathes, sounding almost relieved. "Good. And Lucille?"

"Lou is doing well," I murmur.

"Thank goodness." She's quiet for a moment before she continues, "I…I want you to know that I heard what your father tried to do. I overheard him speaking to Jason about it yesterday morning. I–I would've called you if I had known beforehand. I would've tried to do something to stop him before he went that far." That's a first . I'm stunned by my mother's admission and the sound of her voice breaking. "I left him, Dahlia."

"What?" I crawl back onto my bed, covering my feet with blankets, as if it'll somehow protect me from what I've just heard.

"I'm in Indianapolis with my sister. I arrived yesterday evening." She sniffles. "I didn't tell him where I was going, but I have no doubt he'll figure it out soon enough. He's a little caught up in rage over your sister's wedding right now, so I imagine it'll take some time for him to recover from that. I'm hoping his fury toward me will take a backseat for a while."

"You left him?"

"Yeah." A soft sob rips from her throat. "He crossed the line. He's been crossing the line for years. I'm so sorry my line wasn't you, Dahlia. I'm sorry for that, and I know that nothing I ever do will make it up."

Tears stream down my face, and I do nothing to wipe them away, wishing she could see the way she's breaking me once again.

"My line should've been you, the same way yours has always been your daughter. It was my responsibility to teach you, but instead, you're the person I had to learn from, and I'm so sorry."

I don't know how to respond. I don't forgive her, and I'm not sure I can accept her apology either. I don't know if I have it in me, though it still feels like some inner child deep inside me is being embraced by her mother for the first time in her life.

"Dad has been doing a lot of shady, illegal shit, and I found out about it. I had proof, and I turned it over to authorities earlier tonight. A warrant should be issued for his arrest in the next few days," I find myself blurting out. "I hope they get him before he gets to you. Darby and I wanted to make sure you were aware this was coming."

"Thank you," she says quietly.

"You're welcome," I respond, unsure of what else could be said. "I… I've got to get going, get Lou to bed. Good—"

"Dahlia," she interrupts. "I…If you…If you ever need anything, if you ever want anything from me, I'm here." She sighs. "And thank you. For breaking the cycle. For saving them both."

I know she's referring to my sister and my daughter.

"I wish someone could've saved you," I whisper.

"I wish I could've saved you."

"I didn't want to be saved."

She chuckles. "No, I suppose you didn't, but it sounds like you were nonetheless." She's quiet before adding, "I hope he's good to you."

"Better than I deserve." My nose stings, and a knot of emotion forms at the center of my chest.

"You deserve everything, Dahlia."

Tears spill over again. Not sad or broken or angry tears, but ones of gratitude. Suddenly desperate to be back in his arms, I choke out, "Bye, Mom."

"Bye, Dahlia, darling."

I hang up, dropping my phone onto the sheets next to me. My head falls against my knees as I let out a lifetime of pent up insecurity and loneliness.

I'm not healed, and I haven't forgiven her. I'm not ready to rebuild any kind of relationship with her, and I'm not sure I ever will be, but I think I finally received the one thing I needed more than the rest.

It wasn't my father's approval I was after all this time. It was hers.

I needed her to admit I was never the problem. I was never broken. She was the one who failed me . They both did. Her acknowledging that truth was the closure I thought I'd never have.

I give myself a few more minutes to cry it out before gathering my composure and heading back downstairs. The reception rages on as I make my way across the yard and find Monica and Carlos at one of the tables. They're watching Everett and Lou with amused smiles as he spins her around the dance floor on his toes.

"Darby and Leo have a car picking them up at eleven-thirty to take them to a hotel downtown, and they'll head to the airport tomorrow morning," Monica says as I fall into the seat next to her. They're honeymooning on some private island owned by a rich heiress friend of Leo's near the Maldives. "We're going to take Lou home with us for a sleepover so you two can have the house to yourselves."

"You don't have to do that," I say, leaning against her shoulder.

"Oh, but I already got Lou excited about it." She smiles down at me.

"Thank you," I whisper.

She responds by grabbing my hand where it rests on the table, and we go back to watching Everett and Lou dance together, my sister and her new husband laughing beside them.

It's then I realize everything I've ever needed is right here in front of me.