Chapter 22

CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO

NO ONE

E very step I took echoed off the rough-hewed walls around me. I thought I was deep in the pits of the Night Spawn headquarters, but this felt like a different place entirely. We'd moved through a maze of tunnels and walked for long minutes. The cement floor was flat and the walls were rough as though they'd been dug out of the ground by hand. The smell of damp dirt lingered where the tunnels were dark and silent. A chill ran up my spine, and I wrapped my arms around myself and blew out a breath.Marius strode in front of me with his shoulders back and chin held high. I envied his confidence. His thick leather coat billowed out around him with every step he took. His wild hair swayed and moved with him, and for a moment I was distracted by how the strands moved.

He glanced back at me over his shoulder. "This is the point of no return."

"I know." I swallowed around the nerves in my stomach.

I'd been a vampire for less than a decade, but I couldn't feel more out of place among them. I didn't share their extreme strength or speed. The only thing we had in common were the fangs that seemed to descend of their own accord whenever I felt strong emotions. I was a human with pointy teeth who couldn't return home and felt as though I had no home anywhere. I'd been lost among the shuffle until he found me.

Marius dropped back to walk next to me. He threw his arm around my shoulder and pulled me into his side. He beamed down at me. "You're joining us, and now you will always have friends, a place to belong."

I gave him a half-smile and prayed his words were true. "Yes, Marius."

"And let us not forget the power you'll wield. Your true vampire nature will come out." He pressed his fingers into my shoulder and gave it a squeeze. "I'm so very proud of you."

The knot in my chest eased at the sound of his words. It was a rarity for anyone to say they were proud of me. When I was a human, I'd been small, feeble even, easy prey, and easily distracted by books. I preferred them over anything else. They were an escape from my existence, and I found that fact to be true even now as a vampire. The only benefit was that I could read even faster now.

"Thank you, Marius."

He turned down another tunnel and led me toward a metal door. There was a window next to it as though I was walking into an interrogation room rather than to receive my new powers and join his army. I didn't particularly feel one way or the other about The House of Shade, though Marius said otherwise, I just wanted someplace where I felt I belonged. Eternity was a long time to wander the Earth alone, and after nearly a decade, loneliness was a monster I no longer wanted to face.

"No need to thank me, child." He opened the door. "We are, of course, as one. And after your transition, you too will be one with us."

He walked me into the room, and I was greeted by the oddest stench: sulfur. It stung my nose, and I took a small step back, but Marius was there to move me forward into the dark room. I got the eerie feeling this was a mistake. It was too dark, too secluded. I'd been all over the Night Spawn headquarters and not once had I ever felt like there wasn't a vampire around. But here it was damp and silent. The air was stagnant yet cold. The walls were thick rock. Only the one wall with the window in it was made of cement. I couldn't hear past my own racing pulse.

"Perhaps I need to think on this a bit more." My voice sounded small, even feeble to myself.

"Now, now, my dear, you trust me, don't you?" Marius smiled down at me, and he turned me around to face the door as he took a step between me and it, blocking me from leaving.

"Of course I do." He was the first one to pay attention to me, the first one to take the time to talk to me about what my hopes and dreams were.

"Then you are ready to become one with us." He placed his hands on my shoulders and gave them a squeeze. "I am confident in this."

"Right, okay, yes." I closed my eyes for a second and took a breath, then blew it out. I smiled up at him. Finally I would belong. Finally I would have a place. "I'm ready."

"Lovely." He dropped his arms and took a step back toward the door. "I'll be just outside, and when it's over, you'll be a completely new vampire."

Completely new ? Did I want to be completely new? Not really. I just wanted to find a place where I fit in as myself. But if this was some weird kind of initiation or blood magic, I was sure I could stand it to have a place to belong. Families were made every day, after all. They didn't have to be just blood-related.

I gave a nervous chuckle. "I mean not all new, right?"

"You'll be the best version of yourself." He took another step back. "Young, strong,and powerful ."

He moved out of the door and smiled at me. "Welcome to the true Night Spawn."

"But what if I like who I am?" I just wanted others to see what I saw in myself. I wasn't sure I wanted a big change. Perhaps just a few things.I knew my strength was lacking. My speed was not what it should be. It stung to know I wasn't even close to what I should have been.

The door slammed shut between us and I heard the distinct click of a lock. I reached for the knob and gave it a twist. Nothing happened. I pulled at the door. It didn't budge. I knocked on the door. The room went dark, and I was left in total blackness. I spun around, listening to the blood rush in my ears.

"Umm, hello? You know, maybe I don't think this is a good idea."

A low growl rumbled from within the walls. I spun again. I am not alone . "Marius, I don't want to do this. Okay? I-I don't think this is meant to be."

But the door didn't open, and I knew he was standing outside the window watching. I felt hot breath on the back of my neck. Goosebumps rose over my skin. I whirled around and I was met with two glowing amber eyes. They looked like a wild animal's eyes reflecting in the night. I tried to move but I froze, my fear holding me hostage. I opened my mouth to scream. and a large hand wrapped around my face and covered my jaw. The fingers wrapped around the back of my head and pulled at my hair.

It lifted me off the ground. I swung my dangling feet through the air, desperate and confused. Suddenly, it slammed me down. My skull cracked back against the floor and black dots swarmed my vision. I tried to clear my mind, but it was slow coming. Warmth spread across the back of my head and flowed over my neck and shoulders. The smell of my own blood hit my nose, and I found the strength to struggle against the thing pinning me down. I swung my arms out and kicked my legs again, but again I connected with nothing. The hand over my mouth was like a solid vise, but its body was formless. It was like kicking at air.

Black and gray smoke filled the room in a spiraling funnel. It twisted and moved like a snake coiling in all different directions. The lights above flashed back on, blinking at me, then they turned to flicker like a strobe light. Panic and fear rushed through my body. I didn't want this. Whatever this was, my whole body screamed that it was wrong. The smoke hovered over my face, and for a moment a face appeared in it. It opened its mouth and long shark-like fangs descended. Drool stuck to both the upper and lower teeth, and a whimper, muffled by the thing's hand over my mouth, escaped my lips.

It snapped forward and the mouth of the smoke covered my face completely. The hand moved away, and I sucked in a sharp breath. Blackness swarmed my vision, and I felt it shove its way down my throat and into my body. I choked on the sulfuric taste and my lungs seized. My back bowed as pain exploded through my limbs. Every cell in my body exploded, and it felt like they were reforming anew. Fire and ice raged in a war inside me. Sweat and shivers racked me from the inside out. Moments turned to days that felt like years and went back to seconds again. I was lost, gone in this cloud of gray and black smoke. I wanted to scream for help, but I knew there would be no answer.

Slowly, ever so slowly, my will to fight, to survive, slipped away. My body stilled and I lay there letting this happen to me. It was a violation of the deepest kind. My soul, my life, my memories all fell to the back of my mind where they were locked away until they were nothing but lost in the dark, smoky fog. I was nothing, my cells burned to nothing. My life was nothing.

It slowly withdrew with a growl, and I didn't move. The smoke left my body a shell of itself, and the pain of fire and ice remained in my veins. I dared not move, yet my breaths began once more, and I felt the cool, damp air run down my throat. Slime covered my face and limbs. Sulfur clung to my hair and arms. Still, I had to remain so still in the hopes that if I didn't move, I wouldn't feel anymore.

The door clicked open, and the hiss of fresh air filled the room. Still, I couldn't move. Marius knelt beside me and pinched my chin, forcing my eyes toward him. "Who are you?"

I thought. I scanned my memories for a hint of who or what I might be. There was nothing. My mind only showed me hazy images that were not clear. My brow furrowed, and I swallowed, searching for the words. It felt like razor blades in my throat, and I tried to swallow again.

He pinched my chin harder. "Who. Are. You?"

But there was nothing left of what I used to be. There was only this, only right now. I cleared my throat. "I am no one."

He shoved my head back, releasing my chin. "Welcome to the new Night Spawn."

He didn't meet my eye, he just rose to his feet and started for the door while calling over his shoulder, "We'll see if you're worth anything to me. Now get up."

Get up? I didn't know if I could. The pain remained so acute it hurt to breathe. Who was I? What was I? Deep down, I knew that whatever I'd been before no longer existed, and I truly was no one.