Chapter 39

Thirty-Nine

Mira

Mira didn’t remember much of her healing, only a lot of pain. She woke a few times; she was certain of that. There were times when she remembered soft hands on her cheeks and a melodic voice who told her that she would live. He ordered her to live, because if she didn’t, then he would follow her into the abyss.

By the time she was well enough to sit back up and be aware of everything around her, she was mostly alone. Byte was still there, and the little droid was so excited to see her again. It hadn’t left her side, and instead decided the best spot in the entire dome was right next to her bed.

She’d arrived here essentially dead. But because she had been hooked up to the undine, it had been like chest compressions. The undine had breathed for her, and so her body had been forced to stay alive. Melete had stayed with her for days with that cord connected to her, breathing for an achromo she should have hated.

The moon pool no longer closed. She wasn’t all that certain why, but had a feeling it had to do with the attack on Beta.

She didn’t know much about that. The yellow finned undine, Maketes she had since learned, told her about the attack and that most of the people in her city were still alive and well. She didn’t have any reason to worry too much about them, although he seemed to hesitate while telling her.

Those black eyes looked at her and saw too much. He knew there was something angry bubbling inside of her. That she wanted to see Arges and still hadn’t seen him.

Thus far, she had stopped herself from asking. Maketes had told her that his people had kept him trapped. At least, that was how she thought he meant it. He said that Arges wasn’t coming for her, and she’d thought that was because someone wasn’t letting him return to her side.

The longer it took for him to get here, the longer she wondered if he just didn’t want to see her.

She feared he considered her unworthy. Or maybe he’d gotten what he wanted out of her. Information, sex, and then he thought better of it. Maybe she’d been so bad at having sex with him that he had decided it wasn’t worth it to keep her around. She didn’t know.

All she could do was stay in her dome. Clearly, her own people didn’t want her back. So she healed, waiting until she was well enough to walk, then workout, and then swim. After that, she swam every day.

No one attacked her. None of the undines seemed to care that she existed. Even the ones who visited with fish for her to eat watched her swim with amusement. She was getting stronger, though, and that’s all that mattered. Stronger. Healthier.

The medkit had stitched up her body, and that was the only thing she could focus on right now. Because her heart was shattered.

Maybe she just wasn’t good enough for him. At least not any more than as a pet.

Swimming now, she adjusted her rebreather, so it didn’t pinch her face so badly. Mira had to test the damn thing to make sure it still actually worked. After the last fiasco where it had stopped working, she didn’t really trust it. Not as much, at least.

A clawed hand reached out of her peripheral and grabbed the rebreather. She only had a second to shout, “Hey!”, before the rebreather was pulled from her face. Planting her feet hard against the chest of the undine next to her, she shoved with her feet and pushed off of them. All she had to do was make it back to the dome. She’d been practicing. She was better at holding her breath for long periods of time, and getting better the more she practiced.

A sharp jab at the side of her neck, and suddenly there was air in her lungs. Pushing, inflating, giving her a sense of life.

“Where are you off to?” She’d know that deep voice anywhere. Part of her wanted to melt into him, to weep in relief that he was finally here.

The other part of her wanted to hit him, and that was the part that came out on top. Whirling, she punched her fist to his chest and then ripped the tube out of her neck. “Where have you been?”

He grabbed the end of the tendril, sighing, before attaching it to her neck again. “Feral creature. I’ve been here, but there has been much for me to fix.”

“Fix?” She felt him inflate her lungs again, and the feeling was so strange it was hard for her to even focus. “I don’t know what you’re trying to do here, Arges, but you haven’t come to see me since I’ve been injured.”

“I’ve been here, just not while you were awake.” He lifted a hand again, brushing her hair behind her ear before making that sighing sound again that suggested he was pleased. “I have missed you.”

He didn’t... He didn’t get to say that. She had missed him too, but she’d been sitting here alone. Sad. Dreaming of him coming and telling her that she meant something to him and instead, here he was, being an absolute dick!

“No,” she muttered, turning toward the dome and swimming away from him. Air be damned. “I’m not having this conversation with you.”

He floated above her, barely flicking his tail to keep up with her. “Did you not miss me?”

“While dying? Yeah, a little.” She hated admitting it, but she’d told Arges that she was in love with him. So, of course, she had missed him. She’d be lying if she said she didn’t.

“Then why are you swimming away from me?”

“Because I’m mad at you.”

He swam around her, and their connection made her have to spin with him. The gliding rotation was graceful and calming, but she refused to be calm with him right now. “Why?”

“Because I almost died, Arges!” She sucked in water and choked. Just because she had air didn’t mean being underwater was easy for her. She felt him exhale hard and all the water expelled out of her mouth, as her lungs couldn’t contain all the air. It was uncomfortable and strange and it wasn’t human. None of this was.

She couldn’t even breathe hard in her anger. She could only take what he was giving her. So all she could do was glare at him, tears pricking her eyes alongside the saltwater.

“You weren’t here,” she said, her voice choking a bit. “You handed me away when I was clearly dying and you didn’t even care. You stayed there, and then you didn’t come here. I thought...”

She didn’t know what she thought. She thought he would come back as her knight in shining armor to tell her that he loved her too, and that they would figure out a way to be with each other, but all of this had happened so fast. And then nothing happened. Nothing at all. She didn’t even get to see him.

“Mira,” he murmured.

She let him grab her around the waist and drag her through the water toward him. Maybe she was weak for it. But she wanted to feel him, even if it was a lie. His clawed hands curved around her skin, pulling her against hard muscles and a tail that coiled through her legs with a familiarity she wasn’t sure he deserved anymore.

“Don’t Mira me,” she said. Planting her hands against his stupidly firm chest, she gave a little shove. “Where have you been?”

“I told you, there were things I had to do. I had to make sure that the two of us were safe, and now I know for certain that we are.”

“Really? That’s all you have to say? You had to make sure we were safe.”

“I had to know for certain that everything was where it was supposed to be. My people and yours do not play nicely, and I had to tell some rather elaborate lies to make sure that I could even get out of those bindings to save you.” He dragged his face along hers, and she felt the fluttering gills at his neck toy with her skin. “My people were not happy that I saved you. Some of them wanted to kill you after I had worked so hard to save you. So I had to stay. I had to argue for your life. Our life.”

“I don’t understand a word you’re saying.”

“I’m sure you don’t.” He cupped her cheek, turning her face to his and pressing a kiss to her lips, lingering there for long moments. Almost as though he meant it. As though he really meant he’d missed her. “I did not want to return to you until I knew you were safe. Until I know we could love each other without anyone else interfering.”

Love.

He’d indirectly said he loved her, but that wasn’t the same. That wasn’t what she wanted to hear.

She wanted to hear that he was consumed by her. That every second he was away from her, it was like he’d torn out a piece of his heart and let it dangle in the currents. She wanted him to bleed because he wasn’t with her.

They were insane thoughts, but it was how she’d felt. Like a part of herself was missing. Like she wasn’t entirely a person until he came back to her.

He tugged her against him a little harder, scooping his hand around the back of her neck and forcing her to look at him. Really look into those black eyes that saw too much. “Did you question my affection while I was gone?”

“Every day.”

“Really?”

“Every second,” she said, her voice a little choked. “I could have died. I would have if Melete hadn’t breathed for me. Or if we didn’t have the medkit. That man tried to kill me and all you did was hand me off and then disappear for weeks.”

His claws dug into the back of her head. “I went back to kill him, Mira. I followed him through the entire city and then I chased him in his escape pod. He tried to flee so he wouldn’t have to pay the price of touching you. But then I ripped his ship apart, and I tore him in half. I left him for the sharks, so that they would all know what happens to anyone who lays a hand on you.”

Her heart skipped a beat. She didn’t think it was normal for her to be so turned on by that answer, but fuck, she wanted him.

He inhaled deeply, those gills fluttering against her stomach, where he was suddenly very obviously excited. “Fuck, woman. You shouldn’t react like that when I tell you I murdered someone for you.”

“How else am I supposed to react? I thought for weeks that you didn’t care about me anymore. You disappeared, and I thought I was some pet you put back in the carrier and was having people take care of you while you lived your life.”

“Never,” he hissed, his fingers flexing against her hip and the back of her head. “I couldn’t leave you if I tried, kairos. You are and always will be the soul of my soul, the heart that beats in my chest. I would do anything for you, Mira. Even lie to my own people, convince them that fighting against the achromos is foolish, and making someone else the leader of their warriors. I have given everything up for you.”

“You didn’t.”

“I will,” he said with a shrug. “If that is what you want. That is what I have set in motion, at the very least. At any point, I will make Maketes the person who leads the pod. You and I can disappear forever.”

It sounded nice. Just the two of them. But then she would never see more undines, or more people in the ocean that still made her feel like this world was worth saving.

They had been so helpful in his absence. Melete, Maketes, a few others whose names she hadn’t caught, but they were kind. Really, truly kind. They had brought her food and asked her questions. Some of them had even taken their own chips so they could actually converse with her. They were sweet, and she didn’t want to lose all that.

But most of all, she didn’t want him to give up everything for her. That wasn’t fair. Not when there was a chance they could make this work.

She shook her head. “I want to figure out a way for all of us to stay together. I want you to have your people and me, Arges.”

“There are some who say that is an impossible future.” He kissed her collarbone, his lips skating over her skin. “I have spoken with the ancients in the sea. They showed me our futures, and there were only two paths. One where we fight, and one where we are a family.”

“Maybe you didn’t see everything,” she replied, petting her hands down his hair and digging her nails into his scalp. “Maybe you only saw a piece of the future. A moment where we were alone. But maybe your future is with me and with them.”

“We have a lot of work to make that future happen. Your people. My people. None of them want to get along and I don’t think it’s entirely possibly just yet. You’ll have to translate for us before they will even speak with our kind.”

“I can do that.” She didn’t know how or what would happen if she did, but she would try.

Arges scraped his nails down her sides, and those fine points of contact made her gasp. A sudden rush of heat flooded through her veins and, oh, she had forgotten it felt like this when he touched her.

Like nothing else mattered. Like a shark could swim by her and she wouldn’t even notice. Even if it took a bite out of her, she would just smile and beg Arges to touch her again.

Arching against his touch, she tried to remember what they had been talking about. “So your plan is to work with the achromos, then? You want to make a deal with them?”

“My plan is to bring you to a grotto and fuck you where the water is warm and you can be comfortable.” He nipped at her neck, his sharp teeth likely leaving marks. “I want to hear the sounds you make again, this time with nothing standing in our way. I want to know that you are mine, and I am yours.”

She was nodding. Why was she nodding like an idiot?

Wrapping her arms around his neck and her legs around his waist, she held him tightly against her. “Let’s do that, Arges. And perhaps this time I can come up with a way for both of your... needs to be met at the same time.”

He growled low under his breath and those black eyes flashed. “That is not possible, achromo.”

“Maybe not with an undine.” She reached between them and palmed where she thought he came out. A kick of his hips against hers was her reward, and she swore the scales shifted underneath her palm. “But that’s entirely possible with a human.”

“Fuck me,” he groaned, already swimming away from the dome so no one would find them.

“I intend to,” she replied with a bubble of laughter.