Chapter 15

Prism

ELITE GROUP CHAT

Jamie: Bros, are we sure Prism actually went to talk to the cops?

Lars: Where else would he be?

Jamie: Maybe he skipped town. Trying to get out of moving.

Max: Well, would you want to live with Kruger?

Kruger: Don’t make me TP your room again.

Max: Try it. I dare you.

Jess: I want to live with Ben.

Max: I give you three months tops.

Kruger: *toilet paper emoji* x 6

Madison: Why are you all texting each other? We are literally in the same place.

Rory: They’re trying to get out of moving.

Jamie: Prism started it.

Ryan: Seriously, have you checked in w/ him, Kruger? What if they arrest him again?

Rush: We should go down there.

Prism: *stop sign emoji* I’m literally pulling up to the house now.

Kruger: P! You told him our address?

Ryan: Is that Arsen’s ride? Pretty nice for not being a Rubicon.

Win: *eyes emoji*

Win: Bro! A G wagon. That’s sweet.

Rush: It’s not a Corvette.

Landry: Stop staring out the windows and get back to hauling boxes.

Wes: How’d it go at the police station, P?

Prism: *unicorn emoji* *rainbow emoji*

Max: Good. Get your ass in here and get to work.

Prism: *Peach emoji*

Jamie: You took so long I ate your breakfast.

Madison: Jamie Michael Owens…

Jamie: I thought he skipped town. Can’t waste good eats.

Prism: *pig emoji*

Jamie: I deserve that.

Ryan: You can pay for the pizza later.

Win: Pizza party!

Darkening the phone screen,I gazed out the windshield, my stomach dipping a little at the sight of my new place.

The front door was propped open, and a few boxes were stacked on the sidewalk. Jess’s ancient car was parked in the driveway right next to Kruger’s Audi. Jamie’s red Rubicon and Ryan’s black one were parked behind them. The driveway beside ours was filled with Win’s black Range Rover, Wes’s bright-yellow Rubicon, and Rush’s blue Corvette. Lars’s matching blue Corvette was likely parked in the garage with Max’s motorcycle.

Win waved from the upstairs window, possibly my new bedroom, and at his side, Lars waved too. Downstairs, Jamie and Ryan waved from the living room as Landry and Rush came out the door to grab the boxes.

They were worried about me. Not just Kruger and Jess but all of them.

“So this is your new place?” Arsen asked, pulling up behind a rented moving truck with the back open.

I nodded. “Thanks for the ride.”

Even though it was time to get out, I sat there in the passenger seat just staring at the stone and vinyl townhouse. It wasn’t necessarily chaos, but it wasn’t exactly calm either. Moving days never were. Of course, today would be hectic. We were leaving the dorm we’d been in for almost two years and replacing it with a three-bedroom townhouse. We needed actual furniture for this place. Dishes for the kitchen. Appliances… Wait. Did we need to buy appliances?

My eyes went to the back of the truck, but there were no appliances. Just some furniture we’d bought from a local store that they’d held on to until today.

The fact that I didn’t know if we got everything we needed hit me hard because it brought on a surge of helplessness. Being helpless was something I worked hard not to be. It also made me feel a little ashamed that I let Kruger and Jess take on the bulk of all this, pretty much going along with whatever they wanted and planned because it was less stressful than trying to make decisions on my own.

“Hey,” Arsen called softly, his hand sliding over my thigh.

The touch was unexpected, and I glanced down, studying the way his long fingers looked draped across my leg. He had three rings on today. The band on his thumb, the chain-looking one on his pointer finger, and then another silver band on his middle finger, this one with a black spade in the center.

My phone lit up and my stomach tightened, but then I saw who was calling, and the anxiety of talking on the phone vanished.

“It’s my gram,” I told Arsen.

He gave my thigh a little squeeze. “Answer it.”

“Hi, Gram,” I said into the line.

“Hi, honey, how’s the moving going?” Her voice was familiar and calm, and hearing it just then brought a wave of homesickness over me.

Without thinking, I dropped my hand over Arsen’s. His fingers flexed and widened, making enough room for me to push mine between them.

“Not too bad,” I answered, gazing out the window. “Everyone is here helping.”

I could practically see the sparkle in her blue eyes when she said, “Is Jess keeping them all in line?”

I laughed beneath my breath. “Doesn’t she always?”

“She’s going to have her work cut out for her living with you two.”

“We aren’t that bad,” I teased.

“Well, you aren’t. Benjamin on the other hand…”

I laughed.

The humor in her voice melted right into genuine concern. “How are you doing, honey?”

“I’m okay,” I told her, spinning one of the rings on Arsen’s finger.

“I can still get on a plane and be there by tomorrow. Are you sure you don’t want me to come help set up the house?”

Yes. I did want her to come. But I was almost twenty-one. She’d already done so much for me. More than she ever needed to do. I needed to do this to prove to myself I could.

“I’m sure,” I told her. “Elite is all here. We’ll be done in no time.”

“Do you have everything you need?”

“Yeah,” I replied, wondering again about appliances. And dishes.

“I put extra money in your account. Go and get anything you need. And buy your sister some flowers. She deserves them.”

“Yes, ma’am,” I said dutifully.

“Okay, well, I know you’re busy, but I wanted to check in. FaceTime me tomorrow, okay? Give me a tour of the place. I want to see everything.”

“I will.”

“Remember, if it gets to be overwhelming, it’s okay to take a break. You don’t have to do it all in one day.”

Even though I knew Arsen couldn’t hear what she was saying, my eyes shot to him instantly, embarrassment coursing through me and making my cheeks heat.

He wasn’t looking at me, instead staring at his own phone, which he was scrolling through with one hand.

“Yeah, I know,” I mumbled, spinning the ring again.

“All right. Tell everyone hi for me. And, Matt?”

“Yeah?”

“I love you.”

“Love you too, Gram,” I said quietly and then ended the call.

After lowering the phone, I looked back to the house where my friends were starting to pile out the front door.

“Thanks again for the ride,” I said, starting to pull away.

His hand caught mine, lacing our fingers. “Go on a date with me.”

I froze for long moments before slowly rotating to look at him. “W-what?”

“I can’t let you get out of this car until I know when I’ll see you again.”

“You want to see me again?”

“Princess, if I could, I’d never let you out of my sight.”

Oh.“You sound like a stalker,” I retorted, trying not to give away the fact that I wanted to be stalked by him.

“Is that a yes?”

“P!” Kruger called from the other side of the tinted window. “Come on, bro. We got to get our move on.” To punctuate his impatience, he tried to open the car door, but it was locked.

“Quit being a hog, Arsen!” Kruger called, yanking on the door handle some more.

Arsen rolled down the passenger window. “You say something, Kruger?”

Kruger ignored him to lean in the window frame and ask, “That took longer than it should have. Everything go okay?”

I nodded. “Yeah, everything is good. Sorry it took so long. Didn’t mean to leave most of the lifting to you guys.” I couldn’t help but steal a brief glance at Arsen, knowing the reason I was so late wasn’t because of the police questions but because I’d spilled my guts.

“So you don’t have to go back down there, right?” Kruger asked.

“Right,” I answered.

“Amen.”

“Did you say a prayer?” I cracked.

“I’d do anything for you, P. Even call up the sky daddy.”

Arsen snorted. “The sky daddy?”

I grinned. “Never say that in front of Jess,” I told Kruger. “We’ll both get a lecture.”

“Never say what?” she asked, appearing out of nowhere.

“Agh!” Kruger hollered, jumping back. “I swear, woman, you’re one of them ghosts in those movies you like.”

“You just can’t hear her over all the noise you make,” Max told him as he approached.

“Bro! Sweet ride.” Win bounded around Max to try and open the back door. “Hit the locks, bro. Give me a tour.”

Arsen hit the lock button, and the back door was pulled open almost instantly. Win dove into the back seat. “This is sweet! Lars! Come see.”

I glanced at Arsen, worried he would be put off by the sudden onslaught of my friends. But he just smiled.

My door opened, air brushing against my side. “What the hell is that?” Kruger hollered, jolting back and pointing at my and Arsen’s joined hands.

I ripped my hand away so fast, tucking both beneath my thighs. My face flamed with his outburst, and the ringing in my ears seemed louder than before.

“What?” Win leaned between the two front seats, his chestnut hair flopping around as he tried to see what Kruger freaked out about.

“Nothing,” Kruger said, barely containing a grimace. “Thought I saw something.”

My heart was beating unevenly, and my stomach felt like it was on a trampoline. “We should get to it,” I said, sliding out of the Mercedes and shutting the door.

“Since we’re all down here, let’s bring in the couch,” Ryan suggested.

“You guys need a hand?” I heard Arsen ask.

“No,” Kruger said at the same time Max said, “Yes.”

Ryan spoke over them both. “Bro, sure. Sectionals are heavy.”

Arsen got out of the G wagon and pocketed his keys. As we all went to the truck, I pulled out my AirPods, jamming them in my ears and turning on one of my favorite playlists, which was a mix of old and new music.

Four of us grabbed one side, and the other four grabbed the other. Wes hauled in the ottoman that was our coffee table, and the girls directed us through the front door and into the living room. There was already a large rectangular rug laid down on the dark wood floor. It was dark grey, thick, and soft underfoot.

Once the two pieces were in and together, Rush, Arsen, Ryan, and Jamie went back out to get the last section. When they were done, it was a large U shape that the ottoman sat in the center of. The couch was gray like the rug but a lighter shade.

The girls started tossing a bunch of pillows around, I slid out of the room to head toward the kitchen. Our place had almost the same layout as Max, Wes, Win, and Lars’s place next door, except our fireplace was centered on the wall in the living room and theirs was in the corner.

Both places had three bedrooms, three floors, and a garage. The lower floor was basically just a basement with laundry. Max and Win kept workout equipment there at their house. The middle floor was the living room, kitchen, and dining room with a set of glass sliders that led out to a yard. The top level held all three bedrooms.

I went down the small hall from the living room to the kitchen, knowing it probably looked like our friend’s but not remembering for sure. We did look at this unit before signing the lease, but my brain sort of skipped over a lot of the details in the midst of me processing the fact that I was going to be moving houses.

So now I wanted to acquaint myself with it because not knowing was giving me anxiety. The kitchen was to the left and did have the same black cabinets and white countertops as next door. There was a white subway tile backsplash and a double stainless-steel sink with a small window over it.

A long counter with room for stools beneath separated the kitchen from the dining room, which was currently empty. The glass doors had standard blinds covering them, so I couldn’t see into the yard. I didn’t care about the yard, though.

Turning to face the kitchen, I looked immediately for the fridge. It was there. So was a stove and dishwasher. There was even a microwave built in above the stove.

Relief drained some of the tension from my shoulders, and I leaned my elbow onto the counter.

“Matty?” Jess’s voice had me straightening.

I gave her a sheepish smile. “I couldn’t remember if we had appliances.”

She laughed. “They’re all here,” she said. “But we still need to buy some pots and pans.”

“We’ll go out tomorrow, and you can pick what you want. I’ll buy.”

“I’ll pay half.” She pushed.

I shrugged. “Fine. If you want to tell Gram that you refused to use the money she sent…”

She sighed. “Did she really send money?”

I nodded. “You can ask her yourself when I FaceTime her later.”

“Did you pick a room yet?” she asked.

I shook my head. “It doesn’t matter. Whichever.”

She frowned. “You should go look. You might like one better than the other.”

“I’ll just take the one closest to the bathroom,” I said.

She laughed. “Practical.”

Since she and Ben were sharing a room, I insisted they take the “master,” which had its own ensuite. That meant I got one of the other bedrooms without an attached bath, but the one in the hallway would be all mine.

As overwhelming as moving was, it would be nice to have my own spaces.

“You flirting with my wife, bro?” Kruger asked, coming into the kitchen to wrap his arms around Jess from behind and pull her into his body. He nuzzled his face into her neck, getting tangled in her hair, but he didn’t complain. In fact, I was pretty sure I heard him growl the word, “Mine.”

“Your fiancée is my sister,” I said, throwing the F-word out there just to annoy him.

Lifting his face out of her neck, he said, “Your mind is on vacation, but your mouth is working overtime.”

I laughed.

Arsen appeared, his eyes taking in the three of us standing there. “Did you guys need help with anything else?”

“It would help if you left.”

Jess gasped and pulled out of Kruger’s arms. “Benjamin Hayes Kruger, what the hell has gotten into you?”

Arsen just smirked. “Sorry, bro.” Then he gestured to his shirt. “No requests.”

“I can see why you’re a DJ,” Kruger said. “You have a face for radio.”

Arsen laughed, but I didn’t think it was funny.

Pulling out my phone, I shot Kruger a text.

The second his phone went off, he pulled it out of his pocket to check the message. He read it and then looked over at me.

I sent the same message again.

Prism: *cursing emoji* x 2

Before he could reply, I moved past Kruger and my sister to stop in front of Arsen. “I think we’ve got it all from here.”

“I’d stay and help, but I actually have to be at the radio station in an hour.”

“Thanks for helping with the couch,” Jess said, coming to my side. “And for sharing your lawyer with Matty.”

Arsen smiled. “Anytime.” Glancing back at me, he said, “Walk me out?”

I followed him past Jamie and Ryan who were arguing with Max about where and how to hang the TV.

When I stopped partway down the sidewalk, planning to just call out a bye, Arsen grabbed my wrist and tugged me forward. I pulled my wrist free almost instantly, but my feet kept moving, following him all the way around to the front end of the black wagon.

“I’m sorry about Kruger,” I blurted out, more anxious about my best friend than I realized. “I’ll talk?—”

Arsen reached for my hand again, tugging it between us. “You don’t need to apologize for him.”

“But I?—”

“You didn’t do anything wrong, princess.”

No, but Kruger was being a dick, and I should have said something. Done something more than sending a text. But getting into an argument with him on moving day was more than I wanted to deal with.

Honestly, the idea of getting into an argument at all with my best friend was more than I could handle.

“So tomorrow?” he asked, changing the subject.

“Tomorrow?”

“For our date.”

My feet stuttered a little. He really wanted to go out with me? “But it’s Monday,” was all I managed.

He smiled. “Are dates only allowed on the weekend?”

“I-I don’t know.” I’d never actually been on a date.

Those fancy LV trainers scuffed over the ground when he moved closer, tugging the hand he was still holding into his chest. “You wouldn’t make me wait five days to see you again, would you, princess?”

I swallowed. “No.”

“Good boy,” he said low.

The praise lit me up inside.

“I’ll pick you up tomorrow at six.”

“Are you sure?”

“Five.” He decided. “I’ll pick you up at five. Waiting until six is too long.”

I rolled my eyes.

“I can’t kiss you right now,” he murmured, eyes looking at something over my shoulder before coming back to rest on my face. “But tomorrow, I want what’s mine.”

My insides twisted and twirled, his promise whipping up a tornado of emotions inside me. How I stood so still, I didn’t understand because everything inside me wobbled so much.

“P!” Kruger called. “Give us a hand with your bed.”

Pulling my hand from Arsen’s, I groaned. “I forgot to buy sheets.”

“No worries, bro! I’ll take you to get some. I know the best places,” Jamie said.

“You know the best places to get sheets?” Rush heckled.

“He’s theater girl’s errand boy. He just lives to shop,” Ryan cracked.

“Hey, fuck you, Walsh,” Jamie called. “When your girl needs sheets, you go buy her sheets.” Then, “Like you have room to talk, Mr. Fairy Light Hanger.”

“Whipped. Both of you,” Rush mused.

“You literally bought your girl a Corvette… and you’re tattooing your entire arm because she likes ink,” Ryan shot back.

“Boyfriend material. All of you. I just got my girl a house. Clearly, I’m husband of the year,” Kruger bragged.

“It’s a rental!” Max hollered, nowhere in sight.

Bro must have the hearing of a bat.

“I’d like to see things from his point of view,” Kruger muttered. “But I can’t get my head that far up my ass.”

“Your friends always like this?” Arsen mused.

“Always.” I confirmed.

“How about I take you to get sheets tomorrow?”

“Is that what people do on dates?”

His eyebrows arched. “You’ve never been on a date?”

My lips curled in.

“Hey,” he said, reaching out to touch me, then dropping his hand and glancing quickly toward my friends who were still insulting each other in the back of the moving truck. “I’m glad I’ll be your first.”

I nodded.

“And no. Sheet shopping will be after the date.”

I didn’t know why, but that sent my mind to dirty, dirty places.

“Prism, get over here,” Rush called.

“I have to go,” I told him.

He nodded. “I’ll see you tomorrow, princess.”

I went to help my friends carry in the new king-size bed I’d purchased. Hey, go big or go home. The entire time, I listened to Arsen’s engine start up and fade into the distance.

After making it to my new room, we set down the mattress so I could put together the frame. Before getting to work, I went to the window, which looked out over the front yard and street.

The black wagon was long gone, but still, I looked.

“I saw you holding hands,” Kruger said behind me. I glanced over my shoulder, and he made a soft noise. “They went to grab the headboard.”

Nodding, I grabbed the pieces of the bedframe. “I think I’m going to tell everyone I’m gay.”

Kruger was quiet a moment. In that small chord of silence, doubt and anxiety chewed on my belly. Then my best friend nodded. “I’ll support you, bro. Of course I will. And you know Elite will support you too.”

“But?” I said, knowing he wasn’t done.

“But are you sure this is what you want?”

“Arsen didn’t ask me to do this,” I declared.

“He didn’t?”

I shook my head. “He asked me on a date.”

“A date.” The echo was sort of void of any kind of emotion, and I looked at him, trying to gauge his reaction. “You want to go?” he asked.

I nodded.

“You don’t have to come out to your friends to go on a date,” he pointed out.

“I know,” I said, but I felt hollow inside from when he wanted to touch me and didn’t. How I physically ached when he held back from kissing me and how my fingers tingled from pulling them away from his when all I wanted to do was hold tighter.

He’d been completely respectful and cognizant of the fact that my friends didn’t know my orientation. He didn’t complain or act like I was selfish or inconvenient. He said I was enough.

But suddenly, I wanted more.

Suddenly, I was needy and impoverished, fixated on wanting to touch him. To let him claim me, to claim him in front of any eyes that stared our way. I’d been all out with him before, hell, even with who I was. But as I stood there staring at that empty street, I’d unexpectedly become all in.

“You really like him that much?” Kruger asked, his voice hushed as if he knew the brevity of what he was asking.

I met his eyes. Held his stare. That alone was a difficult task for me, but just then, my eyes were as steady as my resolve.

“I think I like him more.”

Just admitting that out loud crashed my confidence, but even in the crash, the truth remained. My arms slackened, and Kruger came forward to take the metal pieces from my hold. When they were gone, he cuffed my shoulder and pulled me in, hugging me hard.

“All right then, bro,” he said. “If this is what you want, I’m here for it.”

“You’ve been a giant dick to him.”

“That’s my job. I’m your brother.”

“I need you to like him, Ben,” I whispered. I wished I didn’t have to be like this. I wished it didn’t matter. But it did. It mattered so much.

And if Ben and Arsen couldn’t get along…

“Like him? Of course I do. He’s like the sun. Totally lights up my day,” Kruger quipped.

I snorted.

He pounded on my back before stepping away. “As long as he makes you happy, then I’m happy.”

I nodded, some of the worst pressure in me easing. “Ben?”

“Yeah, bro?”

“What if it doesn’t work out?” I ached just thinking about it, and because of that, I knew it was already too late for me.

“Not to be one of them dudes that answers a question with a question,” he said. “But what if it does?”

“You think it will?”

“Judging by the way he looks at you? Yeah, P. I think I like your odds.”