13. Elton

CHAPTER THIRTEEN

Elton

“Woah!”

I’m unprepared as Knox hauls me into his apartment, his mouth crashing against mine before I even get the chance to say hello. Was he waiting at the door and staring through the peephole to see when I arrived? He must have been because I hadn’t even knocked.

Regardless, I meet his kiss with equal passion, moaning into his mouth as my tongue brushes against his barbell. He kicks the door shut with his boot while simultaneously ripping off my shirt. And I mean ripping it in half, straight down the middle, to expose my chest like we’re in some bad porno. While it’s incredibly hot, we have things to discuss before the dirtiness starts.

“Knox,” I breathe against his lips, trying to put some distance between us. “We need to talk.”

He shakes his head and pushes aside the torn parts of my shirt to claw at my chest. “No talking. Get naked.”

“No, seriously. Hold up a second, man,” I laugh. Even though his eagerness is a total turn-on, I want to talk.

He narrows his gray eyes and lets go of me petulantly. “What?”

“I wanted to thank you,” I say, smiling softly and chuckling as his eyes widen. When I realize he has no idea what I’m talking about though, I gulp. “Um, for helping me home the other night?”

Remembrance hits him, and he clicks his tongue. “It’s no big deal.”

I mean, it kind of is. Knox didn’t have any reason to take care of me and make sure that I was okay after all those disastrous Flip Fucks I drank. While the actual events that occurred are a bit blurry to me, it was nice of him to make sure I was safe and tucked into bed by the end of the night. Although, I hate to admit I was a little disappointed when I woke up the next morning and he wasn’t there. It would have been nice to not be completely alone for once. I even would have made him breakfast as a thank you.

“It was really cool of you.” I continue, despite the fact that he’s ignoring me in favor of getting undressed. “I actually wanted to give you a proper thank you. Maybe we could go somewhere, and I can buy you a drink? We can avoid anything that Skylar makes because his drinks will?—”

“No need,” he says dismissively, already pulling down his pants, momentarily distracting me with all the tattoos on his naked skin. He braces his hands on his hips and impatiently taps his foot. “Okay. Are we done, then? Can we fuck now?”

I nod, a little disappointed that he just brushed off my thanks. He didn’t even say anything about us getting drinks together. That’s Knox, though. I keep forgetting that he’s a dick. “Yeah, for sure. What do you want to do tonight?”

“I want to fuck you.”

My breath hitches as nerves dance in my stomach. “Oh, okay. So we’re jumping straight in.”

“Is there a problem?” he asks, raising his pierced eyebrow. If I’m not mistaken, he seems pissed, which is absolutely ridiculous, considering I’ve done nothing I can think of to anger him tonight.

“Are you okay?” I cock my head. “Do you need to talk about something?”

He snorts, slowly jacking himself as he juts his chin at me. “Pants off, babe. I don’t need to talk about shit.”

“Okay,” I mumble, trying to remind myself that this is the way hookups go. We’re not best friends, and we owe each other nothing but orgasms. I take off my pants, shimmying them and my underwear down my legs, and even though Knox’s body is all sorts of sexy, I find that I’m having a rough time staying hard. Chewing on the inside of my cheek, I gesture at my soft dick. “Sorry.”

He ignores me again and hauls me to him by my hips, spinning me, and bending me over the couch. “Going to get you ready now. Condom or no condom?”

We had the talk about our status but, for some reason, fucking without a condom right now just seems…wrong. “Ugh, condom.”

He grunts in confirmation, not saying anything else as he disappears to grab one. I have a moment alone while he does, and I find that I’m actually really fucking nervous. Sure, he’s fingered me before, but we’ve only done that once, and I don’t know what to expect. While I have no doubt that it’ll feel good once I get used to it, I’m still worried about how much it’ll hurt, and what it’ll be like.

“Knox,” I say when he comes back, turning my head to look at him. “Can we slow down? Maybe… I don’t know? Talk first?”

His upper lip curls as he scoffs. “Talk? I thought you said you wanted to hook up tonight.”

“I do—” My breath hitches as he starts massaging my ass. “But…”

“But what?” He tears open the condom wrapper with his teeth. “Do you want to fuck or not? If so, spread your cheeks. If not, get the fuck out.”

I don’t know what makes me snap. If it’s the shiny glint of the latex that freaks me out or if it’s his words, but I do. I shoot up, knocking into him, and throw my hands in the air. “What the fuck is wrong with you tonight?”

“Nothing,” he grits out, crossing his tattooed arms over his chest. “You’re the one being weird.”

My jaw drops. “For wanting to talk before getting fucked for the first time? Sue me for thinking it should be special!”

“ Special ?” He says the word with so much disgust it makes me feel like an idiot. “There’s nothing special about this, Elton. We’re fuck buddies. You knew what you signed up for.”

I nod because I did. This was just supposed to be something fun and sexy to help me relax and not obsess about my quest to find my forever person. I was never under any false pretense that Knox would be sweet and kind, but I thought that maybe I’d get a modicum of respect. “I know we’re just fuck buddies, but I thought as friends, you could at least?—”

“Friends?” Shaking his head, he pinches the bridge of his nose. “Jesus Christ, Elton. What makes you think we’re friends?”

I’m the one who looks at him like an idiot now. “Because we’re fucking?”

“That doesn’t make you my friend.” He paces in front of me, digging his fingers into his hair. “Just bend over or get out.”

“What? No!” I argue, trying to get him to stop pacing because it’s giving me a fucking headache. “What’s wrong with you? Do you want to talk about it? We can get some takeout and?—”

He growls when I reach for his hand, and it’s his turn to snap now. “You’re not my friend, Elton! You’re not my goddamn boyfriend either! You’re just a booty call! A fucking rebound! How many times do I have to tell you that?”

Ouch .

“A rebound?” I parrot, shaking my head. “You mean, you’re just using me to get over someone else? Who?”

He curses under his breath. “Fuck, yes. I mean, no. Look, it’s none of your fucking business.”

“Your dick was about to be in my ass! I think that makes it my business!” I shout, growing frustrated. Running a trembling hand through my hair, I wonder how I could have been so stupid to get wrapped up in this. It was fun—it can be fun—but I’m not going to let Knox treat me like trash just because I’m not the one he really wants. “You know what? If you’re so hung up on somebody else, maybe we shouldn’t be doing this.”

His eyes widen as I start getting dressed. “What are you doing?”

“Leaving,” I tell him as I yank my pants over my hips. “This isn’t working.”

I thought that maybe it could. I’ve never really been a no-strings kind of person, and I thought that perhaps it was because the situation had never presented itself, but something about this whole arrangement just seems off. I don’t need Knox to love me, or date me, but liking me just a little is a requirement of hooking up that I didn’t realize I had until now.

“You’re acting ridiculous,” he says, chasing me through his apartment as I move toward the door. “Elton, babe, don’t go.”

Scoffing, I whip around, dishing out just as much as I’ve been given. “ Babe ? Is that what you called him too? I am a grown-ass adult, Knox. I know red flags when I see them. Once you get your shit together, then you can call me. Until then, bye.”

“Wait.”

His hand shoots out to close the door I’m trying to open. Still naked, eyes shining with something akin to desperation, he looks so vulnerable. He fucks with his lip ring, an act I’ve noticed he does when he’s nervous, and gulps. “I’m…”

I wait for him to say he’s sorry, or that he’ll try to be better, but nothing comes out. I wouldn’t have let him have sex with me tonight regardless, but maybe we could have hung out as friends and gotten to know each other better. But I take his silence as my answer.

I move past him and out the door, feeling stupid, because I always knew Knox Sanders wasn’t someone you wanted to be around.

I guess I was an idiot for thinking that people could be different beneath the surface.