21. Chapter 21

"JJ?" I stare at Dean, my eyes wide and unblinking. "Honey, are you okay? Blink or something." Dean's voice is laced with concern as he studies me closely.

"Wow..."

"What's wrong?"

"You... you just look..." I struggle to find the words to express how gorgeous he looks in that crisp RAF uniform with his hair neatly trimmed and styled, and his beard perfectly groomed. "So damn hot right now."

A smile tugs at the corner of Dean's mouth, and he chuckles. "Is that so? Fucking hell, I thought you were having a stroke or something when you just froze like that." I shake my head, still awe-struck at how gorgeous he looks.

With a playful sway, I make my way over to him and run my hands down the lapels of his jacket, smoothing out any wrinkles. "You sure do clean up well, Captain Reyes."

Looking at him now with his beard trimmed and neatly groomed, his hair cut and styled as it used to be when we first started seeing each other four years ago, my mind is flooded with memories of us. The good, the bad and the downright ugly. The last time he was in this uniform was at his friend's funeral. The weekend he proposed to me, and I swore blind I wanted to spend the rest of my life with this gorgeous yet infuriating man.

Today, I stand by Dean's side, my heart overflowing with pride and awe, as he receives the prestigious Victoria Cross from Her Majesty the Queen. The weight of his bravery, sacrifice, and unwavering commitment to protecting not only our son, but also his country, feels almost tangible in the air. If someone had told me just a few weeks ago that I would be here, witnessing Dean's declaration of valour, I would have scoffed and dismissed them as mad. And yet, here I am, watching this incredible moment unfold, still struggling to fully grasp the reality of it.

The golden sun streaming through the windows bathes the ceremony in a warm, soft glow, illuminating every detail of this momentous occasion. My heart swells with emotion as I watch him step forward to receive this well-deserved honour, the cheers and applause of his family and members of his squadron gathered echoes around us. It feels like a dream, one so vivid and beautiful that I never want to wake up. In this moment, surrounded by the recognition of his courage and the profound sense of honour lingering in the air, my eyes well up with tears and I can feel the lump in my throat thickening. I've cried an endless number of tears over this boy, but today the tears are those of joy.

And oh my God, the Queen of England just smiled at me.

My life is complete.

After Dean's reward ceremony we drive back to his parents' house where they of course throw a big barbeque to celebrate his medal. Dean's parents invited his superiors and members of his squadron along with a couple of the guys from the Special Forces.

"Mrs Reyes," Chief Scott greets me as I attempt to walk past him and one other senior officer I can't really place that he's been chatting away with. "I hope you're staying out of trouble and car boots," he adds with a smirk accompanied with a pointed look.

I force a laugh and resist the urge to roll my damn eyes. "Chief Scott, I am, yes. It's nice to see you again. I hope you're enjoying the food." I say amiably and gesture to the plate of wings he's holding.

"Oh, I am indeed, yes. Thank you for inviting us. It's been a while since I've had a good barbeque." I didn't invite him. My mother-in-law did. Ever since this man stood at my door over a year ago and broke the news of Dean's death to me—or shall I say bald-faced lied—I harbour a deep dislike for him and I'm not one to hold onto grudges.

"Of course. I imagine with your line of work it doesn't leave a whole lot of time to socialise or spend time with your family."

Chief Scott smiles and takes a sip of his beer. "It absolutely does not, but civilians get to enjoy their time because soldiers sacrifice theirs. It's a small price to pay for keeping our beloved country safe, knowing families can sleep easy at night with us watching the skies."

My eyes find Dean across the garden laughing with his squadron members and I smile. "I promise you, it's not easy sleeping at night knowing your heart is out there somewhere and may not make it home."

Chief Scott follows my gaze and smiles. "No one said it was easy loving a hero."

As if sensing me watching him, Dean turns his gaze and his endless green eyes interlock with mine. "Loving him is the easiest thing I have ever done. It's the distance, the never-ending fear that grips your heart when they're away for months at a time and the sacrifices... those are hardest parts of loving a hero."

"Spoken like a true military wife," Chief Scott's voice resounds with admiration. "It's clear how fiercely and deeply the two of you love each other. You must be bursting with pride for him." I nod, reluctantly pulling my gaze away from Dean to look at Chief Scott. My heart swells with pride and love as I think of all that Dean has accomplished. "Being chosen for such a prestigious program is a great honour for any officer, and it will surely open many doors for him in the future. Dean is the first pilot from our region to have been selected, and we couldn't be more thrilled." Despite my efforts to keep my smile in place, it falters as confusion creeps into my mind.

What prestigious program is he talking about? "I'm sorry, prestigious program?" I ask, unable to hide my bewilderment.

"Ah, here comes the hero of the hour," Chief Scott says with a grin as Dean joins us. "I was just telling your lovely wife about the incredible offer you received from Falconridge Academy and how proud we are of you." My heart swells even more as I gaze at Dean, filled with admiration and love for the man standing before me.

But what am I missing here?

"Falconridge?" I ask, turning to Dean for an explanation. "What's Falconridge?"

"Dean, you haven't told her yet about the offer?"

Dean avoids my eyes and scratches his forehead awkwardly. "No sir, I haven't yet."

"What offer?" I demand, my tone clipped as I stare at him, waiting for an answer.

"I was going to talk to you about it later."

Before Dean can respond, Chief Scott jumps in eagerly. "Falconridge is an elite academy for fighter pilots. They only recruit the best of the best, and Dean has been put forward as a top candidate." My shoulders that were bunched in agitation a second ago start to relax. Okay, that's not so bad. My husband is considered the crème de la crème of fighter pilots. I can certainly live with that.

My eyes volley between Dean and Chief Scott and for some odd reason I can feel a knot starting to form in my gut. "Well, that's exciting."

"You're both going to love Florida," Chief Scott chirps, gives Dean a pat on the shoulder and walks off. And there it is. My heart drops like a lead balloon deep into my stomach. Huh?

"Flori—what?" I stammer, gaping at his retreating back. Did he just say we're going to love Florida ? Why the fuck would I love Florida?

"JJ, come with me." Dean's fingers lace with mine, he pulls me toward the house and guides me up the stairs toward his old bedroom. I observe Dean as he closes the door and leans against it with a sigh. "I was going to talk to you when we got back home."

"Talk to me about what, Dean? What the hell is going on? Why did your Chief of Air just say we're going to love Florida?"

"Because the academy is in Florida." My jaw goes slack and for the second time today I gape at my husband—or rather ex-husband —without blinking. "The programme is for a year with an opportunity as an aviation instructor after graduation."

No, goddamn it, not again.

The back of my eyelids sting and I blink away the onslaught of tears I can feel coming. "What? So, you're just up and leaving for another year ?" Dean shakes his head and takes a step toward me, his hands reaching for me, but I retreat and shake my head, holding my arms out to keep him at a distance. "It sounds to me like you've made up your mind already without talking to me first."

Dean shakes his head, takes my hand into his and pulls me to him and this time I allow him, but deep inside I have the biggest urge to pound my fists into his stupid face. "No, JJ, I haven't. Listen to me, I'm not going anywhere without you or DJ, all right?"

"So, you've declined the offer, then? Because he seems to think we're going to Florida, Dean."

"No, I haven't given them an answer yet. I wanted to talk to you about it first, but Chief Scott beat me to it."

"Okay, I'm listening, talk..."

Dean pulls me over to his old bed and we sit facing each other. The room is small and stuffy, the air thick with tension. I watch him as he speaks, and I can already tell how much this means to him and it kills me. His eyes are bright with excitement, but there's also a touch of nervousness in them.

"Look, I'm not going to lie to you," he begins, his voice earnest. "This opportunity only comes around once in a lifetime, and it is every fighter pilot's dream to be selected by this academy. You're trained by the best instructors and the program focuses on advanced air combat techniques and tactics."

I nod along, trying to understand why this is such a big deal for him.

"Yes, it is in Florida," he continues, "and usually, they don't allow for families to come along, but for us they have made an exception. The academy will arrange housing for us that is close by to the training ground, so I'll be able to come home and not spend too much time away from you and DJ."

My heart sinks at the thought of being separated from him again. We've already been through so much, and the idea of another long-distance stint makes my stomach churn.

"So, you'll be training and that's it?" I ask wearily, dreading the answer.

But Dean shakes his head. "No, I will also be required to go on high-stakes missions."

I feel like someone has punched me in the gut. High-stakes means dangerous. And with Dean being selected for this elite program, it's likely that those missions will be even riskier than before.

I rip my hand out of his and scowl at him. "High-stakes means dangerous, right?"

Dean nods meekly, his gaze boring into mine apologetically. My heart aches as I realize that he's not just asking me to support his dreams, but also put my own fears and concerns aside.

"Jesus Christ, we can't catch a damn break," I mutter, burying my head in my hands. "Aren't you tired Dean? Because I fucking am. When is it going to end? It's just one damn thing after another."

Dean reaches for my hand again, squeezing it gently, forcing me to look at him again. "JJ, hey, you and DJ are my priority first and foremost. If you don't want to come to Florida with me, I'll decline the offer and they'll send someone else and that will be the end of it."

My voice trembles with agitation and hurt as I snap back at Dean. He sits across from me, his expression stoic.

"No, it won't be the end of it, Dean!" I meet his unwavering gaze once again, my tone loaded with frustration. "You can't put this decision on me. It's not fair. You and I both know that deep down, if I ask you to decline the offer, you'll always resent me for it. You've said it yourself, it's a once in a lifetime opportunity. I can't be the one to take your dream away from you. Not after you've worked so hard to get to where you are."

Dean's silence speaks volumes as he stares at me, his eyes searching for an answer.

"Do you really believe I could ever resent you, JJ?" His voice is soft, but full of emotion.

I shrug and push myself up from the bed, needing to move and release some of the pent-up tension in my body.

"Maybe not right now," I begin pacing the length of the room, "but years from now when your career isn't where you expected it to be, you'll look back on this moment and blame me for holding you back. And I refuse to live with that guilt."

I'm aware that I'm ranting, but I can't help it. The frustration and anger are bubbling up inside of me, threatening to spill over. How dare he put this kind of responsibility on me? It's unfair and manipulative.

"Okay fine," Dean's voice cuts through my thoughts, instantly silencing me. "I will take the burden off of you and decline it myself then." He stands up and takes a few steps towards me. "I told you I'm not going without you."

I stare up at him, trying to decipher his intentions as he inches closer. "Okay, fine!"

"Great!"

"Good!" I respond, waiting for relief to flood me, but it doesn't. We stand there in the middle of his old bedroom where we've shared many fights and many passionate moments for a moment just looking at each other, the air around us crackling.

Christ, what am I supposed to do here? Knowing how much Dean loves his job, it would be unfair of me to ask him to give it up for me when I knew what I was getting into when I chose to be with him.

"I will be that girl who waits months for a single kiss from your lips that makes those months apart worth every second. I will never take you for granted. I promise to be patient and understanding, to love and cherish you. And no matter the distance between us I promise to always wait for you."

On the day we stood before our friends and family I vowed to always love him unconditionally, and be patient, and wait for him always. Right now, it feels like I'm betraying those vows. Even if we're no longer legally married, and those vows no longer hold any significance they still mean everything to me, and I know they do to him as well.

As hard as it all is, the truth is I will readily go anywhere with him. Because I've had a taste of what life is like without Dean and I have no interest in it. Perhaps us moving away for a year to a new place will do us good.

Dean shuffles toward me, the floorboard creaking under his boot as he reaches to cup my face in his large hands. "JJ, please don't look at me with those eyes, baby girl. I promise you, my life with you and DJ is far more important to me than any job. All I want is for you to be happy, for us to be happy. I think we fucking deserve that after everything."

A pout forms on my lips as I gaze up at him through my lashes. "So do I, Dean," I say in a soft, pleading voice. "I can't bear the thought of being away from you for an entire year, but I can't just up and leave everything we have here behind. This is our home. If I do come with you, while you're gone DJ and I will be all alone out there. At least here we have our family."

Dean nods, his thumb tracing the outline of my jaw while his eyes search mine. "I know, baby girl. I know it would be unfair of me to ask you to leave everything behind and come with me, especially after everything you've already sacrificed."

"I can't ask you to stay, Dean. Not when I can see how much this really means to you. You've worked so hard; you've earned this opportunity."

"JJ, there will be other opportunities," Dean states, trying his best to reassure me. "Yes, it's exciting and a privilege to be considered, but it's nothing compared to a life with you and DJ. That year I had to spend apart from you, all I prayed for was the chance to come home and be with you. I can always get another job, but there is only one you ."

My eyes close and i exhale a shaky breath. "On our wedding day, I made a promise to love you unconditionally and to always be patient and wait for you. If I ask you to stay, it would go against that promise to ask you to give up something that means so much to you, something you've dedicated over a decade of your life to."

"Baby, it's just a job," Dean insists, but I shake my head, opening my eyes again to look up at him, I curl my fingers around his wrists.

"It's not just a job, it's who you are and it's who I fell in love with. You belong up there, soaring through the skies, Captain Reyes. You wouldn't be the man I fell in love with if you were anything but a fighter pilot." I assert and shrug, "You need to accept it."

Dean shakes his head, opens his mouth to speak, but I press my fingers to his lips silencing him. "It's just a year, and you'll have time off in-between, right?" Dean nods soundlessly. "I'm sure DJ and I can find something to do to occupy ourselves out there while you're working. I mean, they don't call it the sunshine state for nothing, right? And, I can do with a bit of sun."

Dean's lips curl into a gorgeous smile against my fingers. "JJ, am I hearing right? Are you saying you'll come with me?"

I nod, smiling. "Yes, you idiot, I'm coming with you."

I squeal when Dean lifts me into his arms and his lips come crashing down on mine. My arms snake around his neck and I kiss him back with equal zeal. I can feel the excitement exuding off of him, and it makes me happy. This is us. Dean and I, and nothing, not even the looming unknown, can break us apart. As long as we're together, we'll face whatever battles come our way, side by side. In my heart, I truly believe our love is stronger than any obstacle life throws our way.

We eventually break apart, breathless and grinning like a couple of fools in love. Dean brushes his thumb against my cheek, his gaze soft and full of love. "I love you so fucking much, JJ."

"I love you too, but if you take me all the way out there and die on me again, I will hunt you down in the afterlife and spend all of eternity making you pay in the most painful way possible." I threaten, my eyes narrowing playfully, and Dean just laughs. The deep throaty sound reverberates through me and ignites something warm deep in my belly.

"I'll gladly take whatever penance you'll give with a fucking grin on my face, baby."

Be still my manic heart. I just adore him.

Dean leans in and draws me in for a slow, deep kiss that has my toes curling and my lady bits aching for some much needed attention from my handsome soldier. When Dean's tongue brushes against mine I let out a breathy moan and my hips instinctively rock against his groin eliciting a groan of pleasure from him. All the passionate times we've shared in this very room flood my mind and fuels my desire for him. The sex fog rolls in and it's so thick that I can't even think of all the guests and family members that are wandering around the house. The thrill of us potentially getting caught at any moment is electrifying. I want him and judging by the feel of his raging erection grinding against my pussy, he's feeling the same.

"Dean..."

"I know, baby." In a matter of seconds, I'm pressed up against the bedroom door and we're kissing like two untamed animals. I'm so consumed by my need for him that my mind doesn't even register that he's somehow unfastened the trousers to his uniform and his hands are slipping up my dress and pulling aside my underwear.

I've never been more thankful for dresses than I am in this moment. "Fuck, baby, you're so wet," Dean pants into my mouth as he rubs the tip of his cock over my slit.

"Alpha One, you're cleared for take-off. The runway is all yours."

"Roger that, base command." Dean drawls with wicked grin and presses his forehead to mine as he slowly pushes himself into me. My mouth hangs open when I feel him filling me and my walls flutter and stretch to accommodate his length. "Ahh fuck," Dean groans gruffly when he pushes in to the hilt. That first thrust already has me whimpering in pleasure. "Shh, we need to be quiet, baby."

Ugh, I don't do quiet and neither does Dean. It's impossible for us, so I curl my fingers in his hair and drag his mouth hungrily to mine. It's the only way I'll keep quiet. Dean's mouth attacks mine, nipping, biting and sucking on my lower lip while he works his cock into me with short, hard thrusts. I can feel that pressure starting to build deep in my groin and my moans become louder and so does his.

I wrap my legs tightly around his hips, pulling him closer to me as he thrusts deep inside of me. As I rock my hips back and forth, we both let out a long moan of pleasure. His hands grip my hips tightly, his fingers digging into my skin as he watches me ride him with a hunger that matches his own. Sweat beads on our skin, glistening in the dim light of the room.

Dean's hot breath mingles with mine as he pants into my mouth, his words driving me wild. "Fuck baby, ride Daddy's cock just like that. You're such a cock hungry little slut and I fucking love it. I can't get enough of you." His voice is raw and filled with desire, fuelling the fire burning within me.

My body ignites with heat as I chase down my climax, desperate for release. It's so close I can almost taste it. My heart pounds against my chest, the sound of it ringing in my ears as every muscle in my body tenses with anticipation. Dean slams his hips up into mine, grinding against my g-spot with each thrust, sending us both spiralling towards our mutual ecstasy.

"Oh God, Dean," I cry out in pleasure, unable to hold back any longer. "I'm coming... oh yes!" With a low, primal growl, Dean pulls me closer, his body hot against mine as he commands me to milk his 'fucking cock' and make him come. My breathing quickens as I eagerly comply, my mouth watering at the thought of bringing him pleasure. As my lips and tongue work their magic against his, his own movements become more urgent and desperate. With every powerful thrust, I feel myself getting closer and closer to that sweet soul-shaking pinnacle of climax.

And then it happens; a shuddering whimper escapes me as my walls clamp down on Dean, sending us both soaring over the edge together. His growls mix with my moans as we give in to the overwhelming pleasure coursing through our bodies.

But even as my orgasm takes control, Dean's thrusting never falters. In fact, it slows to a grinding motion that only adds to the intense sensations rocking through me. I can feel every part of him as he fucks me through my release, preparing himself to empty all of his pent-up desire into me.

And when he finally reaches his own climax, I can feel it in every frenzied pulse of his cock and every trembling movement of his body against mine. "JJ," he pants, almost breathless from the intensity of our shared rapture, as he spills rope after rope of his hot cum deep inside me.

We stay still, eyes closed, foreheads pressed together while we bask in the aftereffects of our orgasms until it slowly ebbs away. "Mm, that was the teenager in me that spent countless years in this bedroom fantasising about fucking you in every corner of it."

"Do you think it would have been as hot as it was right now if we had been together back then?"

Dean chuckles, "Probably not, but I would have given it my fucking all." I let out a laugh as I picture us as two fumbling teenagers attempting to have sex.

And then, the sound of Ashlyn's voice echoes up the grand staircase, interrupting our blissful moment. "Jeyla!" she calls urgently. "We have a bit of a code brown situation down here! A shit grenade has exploded in your child's nappy, and he's stinking out the joint! Get down here please... NOW!"

I groan audibly, "Your sister and her impeccable timing as always. I'm convinced the twin bond the two of you share somehow alerts her whenever we're getting it on, because there is no way this is a coincidence."

Dean laughs, brushing a kiss to my lips. "I fucking hope not. At least this time she waited for us to finish. Usually, we get interrupted right when we're in the middle of it or just as I'm about to nut in you."

I raise an eyebrow at him and shake my head. "Do you think anyone heard us?"

Dean's eyes search mine and he purses his full lips adorably. "Do you care?"

Honestly, I really don't. So, I shake my head in response, my cheeks heating, and he grins. "Good, I want everyone to see how insanely beautiful you are in your post fuck glow."

I smack his arm when he leans in to kiss me again. "Put me down, you idiot. I need to clean up, I can feel your ‘glow' leaking down to my arse."

Dean lets out a gruff laugh as he slides out of me and sets me down to my feet gently. I grimace when I feel the warm trickle of his seed running down my legs. As I go to step around him to find something to clean myself up and go to tend to DJ, Dean steps in front of me. My eyes lift to his in question as his hand slides under my dress and he drags his fingers through my slick folds, rubbing the sticky essence of us both into my skin.

"Don't wash it off," Dean speaks quietly, his eyes darkening as he slides my underwear down my legs and stuffs it into his pocket. "The thought of you walking around with no underwear, holding my cum inside you and clinging to your skin is such a turn on." He affirms, taking hold of my chin he tips my head back and brushes a kiss to my lips. "And when I take you home later, I'm going to fuck you full with more of it while you scream for me."

The thought of walking around feeling sticky between my legs should disgust me, but he's right, there's something so erotic about it that my throat dries and a shiver of need rushes through me. Shit, now, I can't wait to get back home.

"Come on baby, our son awaits." Dean laces his fingers with mine and leads me out of his childhood bedroom.

"There you are," Ashlyn complains as soon as we step into the living room. Those green eyes that are identical to her brother's narrow as she takes one long look at me. "Oh, bloody hell. Do you two not possess an ounce of bloody control?" Dean and I turn to look at one another, trying our best to conceal our smiles. "Seriously, there are people around everywhere."

"Whatever do you mean?" I ask, feigning innocence. Ashlyn shakes her head, her arm tightening protectively around DJ when Dean reaches out to take him. "We were just talking."

Ash scoffs and Dean scowls at her when DJ is pulled away from him. "My aunt's left tit you were talking! Did you bother to look in the mirror before stepping back out into public? If there was an advert that screams ‘we just fucked' it would be this picture right here." She asserts, gesturing to the both of us with her free hand.

"Fucking hell, Ash, what are you the sex police?" Damn it, why didn't I stop by a mirror to straighten myself out before coming down here. My hands instinctively move to smooth out my hair as I feel my cheeks shifting through every shade of pink known to man. Dean's strong arm circles my shoulder, and he draws me close against his side before he burrows his nose into my neck and presses a kiss against my pulse point. "Yes, I fucked her, and no I'm not ashamed of it, and I couldn't give a flying fuck who knows. Now, hand over my son."

Ashlyn, shakes her head. "You're not touching my nephew with your filthy sex hands," she utters before she walks toward the kitchen leaving Dean and I watching her retreating back in bafflement.

"Sex hands?" Dean utters as he follows his twin through their childhood home and I watch them with a grin on my face. "How do you think we fucking made him? Ash... Ash, bring him back here or so help me God I will sit your arse down and go through every sordid detail of how he was conceived!"

"Mum... Dean just had sex and he doesn't care who knows about it!"

"I'm going to fucking kill you, Ashlyn!"