29. Declan

TWENTY-NINE

DECLAN

I stand outside the door, my hand hovering just inches away from the wood. I've flown across oceans and continents to be here, but now, with my pulse thudding in my ears, it feels like the longest journey is right on the other side of this door.

I rub my palms on my jeans, heart pounding in my throat. One deep breath. Then another. I lift my hand and knock—soft at first, like I'm not even sure I want him to hear it. But the second time, my knuckles make a sharp, hollow sound. No turning back now.

The door swings open almost immediately, and there he is.

Savion.

My breath catches. His eyes widen, and for a second, we're both just frozen. He looks... thinner, his face sharper around the edges. His skin is darker, kissed by the South African sun. But it's the hollow under his eyes that tugs at me the most. He's exhausted.

And yet, he's still the most beautiful man I've ever seen.

"Declan?" His voice is soft, barely a whisper. I can see it in his eyes—the surprise, the disbelief, and then... yearning. That same goddamn yearning that's been gnawing at my insides for weeks.

I swallow hard. "Can I... come in?"

Before I can even finish the question, he moves. His arms are around my neck, and he's burying himself in my chest. I stumble back a step, catching him, holding him. Christ , the feel of him in my arms again—it's like everything that's been out of place in my life just snaps back into place.

"I missed you," I rasp, the words torn out of me.

Savion's fingers clutch at the back of my shirt, like he's afraid I might disappear if he lets go. "I missed you too. So much."

I pull him even closer, my face buried in his hair. His scent hits me, calming lavender paired with the woody notes of sandalwood and him . The weight of him against me, the warmth of his skin through the thin robe he's wearing, the steady thud of his heartbeat against mine—it's everything I've been craving, more than I can put into words.

"Every day, it felt like you'd slipped further away from me," I confess, my voice rougher than I'd like. My hands can't stop moving, holding his shoulders, his waist, anywhere I can reach. "Savvy, I?—"

He cuts me off with a kiss, sudden and fierce, his mouth crashing into mine. I groan against him, my fingers digging into his hips as I kiss him back with everything I have. His lips are soft, desperate, and I can feel the tremble in his body as his hands slide up to cup my face. It's primal and frantic, both of us trying to make up for the time we lost.

"I love you," Savion gasps against my lips, his forehead pressing against mine. "I'm sorry I ran. I'm so sorry."

I pull back just enough to look at him, my hands cradling his face. "Don't. Don't apologize." I swallow hard, my chest tight with emotion. "I need to know we're connected, even when we're miles apart. No matter where I am or where you are, I want to feel like you're with me. Like we're never really apart."

His eyes search mine, and I can see the change in him—the fire that wasn't there before. He's tired, sure, but there's a determination in the way he's looking at me, like he's finally ready to stand and fight for us.

"I want that too, Declan. I know it won't always be easy, and I'm not perfect." His voice is steady despite the tears in his eyes. "But I promise to face my fears and fight for us, no matter the distance. You mean too much to me." He cups my face with his palms. "I know what I want, and I'm not leaving you. Not ever."

The sincerity in his voice hits me hard, and I pull him back into a kiss, softer this time, more deliberate. His lips part, and I deepen it, tasting him, feeling him, trying to memorize every detail.

I slide my hands down his back, feeling the slight tremor in his muscles, and guide him toward the couch. He lets me, and when I sit down, he follows, straddling my lap without hesitation. His hands roam my chest, his breath hot against my neck as he kisses his way down.

"I'm stronger now, Declan," he whispers, his voice breathless as his lips brush my ear. "I'm not afraid to fight for us."

His words send a delicious shiver down my spine, igniting something deep within me. I tug the robe open, revealing his beautiful body, scars and all. My fingers trail over his ribs, feeling the subtle hollows where weight has been lost, but beneath it all, I sense a newfound strength in him. He's different, but he's still mine.

"Show me," I murmur, leaning back just enough to meet his gaze. "Show me how much stronger you are."

Savion intertwines our fingers and leads me toward the bedroom. When he flicks on the switch, the room bursts into a golden glow. He turns toward me, a mischievous glint in his eye. Then he slowly unties his robe and lets it slips down his body and pool on the floor.

I freeze, my heart stuttering in my chest as I see Savion's naked body, fully and in the light, for the first time.

And I take him in.

It was a small victory when Savion let me see his face without makeup for the first time all those weeks ago. Another one when he let me caress his cheek. And another when he gave himself to me for the first time at Joshua Tree.

But tonight it's more.

As he stands before me, the light reveals the scars on his neck and the way they trail down to his left pec. My breath catches as I take in the map of his body—each mark, every dent, and every imperfection carved into him speaks of survival and strength. He's laid bare, vulnerable yet powerful, and the sight sends a rush of emotions coursing through me.

"Savion," I whisper, my voice thick with awe. "You're beautiful."

He looks at me, a flicker of uncertainty crossing his features, but I can see the determination in his eyes. "I'm learning," he murmurs, a tremor in his voice that tugs at my heart. "I want to believe you."

"Believe me," I urge, stepping closer. I reach out, tracing the outline of a scar on his chest with my fingertip, the texture of the skin contrasting with the smoothness around it. "Every scar, every mark—it's part of what makes you extraordinary. You've fought through so much to be standing here, and that's what I admire. You're not just beautiful; you're a warrior."

The way he reacts, that spark of pride igniting in his eyes, sends warmth flooding through me. He's revealing himself, not just physically but emotionally, and it's a gift I don't take lightly. He's shedding the weight of self-doubt, ready to embrace every part of himself. Ready to let me embrace him fully, too.

Savion reaches out and removes my clothes and with every inch of skin revealed, he kisses it reverently. I feel the warmth radiating from him, his body alive and electric against mine. I groan softly as he shifts against me, his hands gripping my shoulders, grounding us both. There's no hesitation now—only raw need, only love.

"I love you," he breathes, his lips brushing mine, each kiss a promise woven into our shared intimacy. "I won't ever stop."

I grip his hips, guiding him, feeling every tremor, every shared breath. "I love you too. Always."

"On the bed, rockstar."

"Um, what?"

"Yes," his eyes glints. "You heard me. On. The. Bed."

I can't help but smile. I'm loving this side of Savion. I haven't seen it before.

I knee walk into the queen-sized bed. It's going to be a tight fit for two big guys, but I don't plan to do a whole lot of sleeping in it. I turn when I get on the center and flip onto my back.

He leans in to claim my lips again, this kiss slower, more intentional. The exploration starts slow but gains momentum, our hands and mouths discovering each other's bodies in new ways that make us shiver with pleasure.

A groan escapes my lips as he moves over me, his strong hands gripping my shoulders for support. No hesitation left now—just raw need and love.

"I need you," he whispers against my lips as our bodies move rhythmically together. "No matter what else is happening, I need you with me."

His mouth descends on me, taking me in fully as he licks and sucks eagerly. The hollow of my neck. My pecs. My navel. Savion moves further down, bypassing my dick that's yearning for attention, towards the sensitive area between my balls and ass, causing me to squirm with pleasure.

"Get in me, baby," I urge him on.

He raises his head to meet my eyes. A look of intense desire crosses his face. "I want to fuck you."

My heart skips a beat at his words; in all of the times we've fucked, I've never bottomed and the thought makes me nervous, but for him… for him I will do it.

"Yes, baby," I consent quietly, "you can take my ass."

With renewed fervor, Savion returns his attention to my cock, taking it deep into his mouth while massaging my balls. He sucks and licks until I can't hold back any longer. Ribbons of cum shoot into his mouth with an intensity that leaves me breathless.

After I'm spent, Savion rises up onto his haunches and uses the cum from his mouth to lube himself up.

"Legs up," he demands huskily.

I comply willingly; goddamn, he can be bossy in bed. It's a side of him only I get to see, and I love it. Holding my legs back myself, Savion spreads my ass cheeks apart and begins to rim me. The mix of his saliva and my cum drives me wild.

"Oh fuck, Savion! Oh fuck!" My arousal returns in full force as he continues his ministrations.

Savion raises his head, his face a messy blend of cum and saliva, He couldn't look more beautiful to me. He spits the rest of my cum into my hole before inserting one, then two, then three fingers to slowly stretch me out. I'm so hot for him, it's surprisingly easy.

He rubs his cock against my hole. My body tenses.

"Want to fuck me instead?"

Oh god, this man.

He's willing to forego his pleasure for my comfort.

"No, I want you to fuck me."

His eyes lock on mine, as if he's trying to figure out the truth of my words.

"I promise, baby," I say. "I want you to fuck me."

"It'll be my pleasure," he says, before starting to penetrate slowly.

I brace myself for the discomfort but it's minimal.

With one strong push, Savion's dick slides fully inside me, his muscular thighs resting against my ass.

"You okay?" he checks in with me after a moment.

"More than okay," I assure him breathlessly.

The rhythm he sets is brutal yet intoxicating and takes me to heights I've never reached before. My dick gets in the game again, getting even harder than it did earlier.

My voice hits notes that would put any rock singer to shame as we climax together—Savion deep inside of me and me on my stomach and chest. Some shoots into my beard.

We collapse against each other, both of us panting, skin slick with sweat. His head rests against my chest, and I hold him close, my fingers threading through his hair.

"I'm not going anywhere," he murmurs, his voice soft but sure. "I promise."

I kiss the top of his head, my heart finally slowing, a sense of peace settling over me that I haven't felt in a long time.

"Good," I whisper back. "Because I'm not letting you go."

The sound of our breathing slowly returns to normal. I've still got my arm wrapped around Savion's waist, and we're just lying there, soaking in the moment.

Then, his stomach growls—loud. I can't help it, I laugh.

He shoots me a look, but he's smiling. "Well, that's a mood killer," he says, clearly amused at himself. Savion's eyes widen. "Shit," he mutters, sitting up suddenly. "The room service… we didn't hear them knock." He checks the clock on the nightstand. "They were supposed to be here, like, over an hour ago!"

I laugh again, pushing myself up onto my elbows. "Yeah, we were a little… distracted."

He rolls his eyes at me but there's no denying the smirk playing at the corners of his lips. "I was starving before you came in, you know." There's a hint of mock annoyance in his tone.

Pulling on his robe, he heads to the door, but not before he plants a kiss on my lips.

"The food survived," he says when returns to the bedroom, rolling the cart toward the bed. "Barely."

I sit up properly. "Cold food's not the worst thing I've had to eat."

Savion looks at me like I'm out of my mind, but there's a softness in his eyes. "You're ridiculous," he mutters, climbing back onto the bed.

I lift one of the silver lids and inspect the plate. "I've had worse, trust me. This is gourmet compared to what they've handed us backstage after some shows."

He laughs, shaking his head, but he grabs a fork anyway. "Fine. Let's see."

We start picking at the food, and I make little jokes about how cold it is. He's laughing, and God, it's such a good sound, so much lighter than when I found him. It's not the dinner I imagined, but hell, I don't care. I'm sitting here with him, sharing cold food, and it feels perfect.