4. Ella

CHAPTER FOUR

ELLA

" A uggieeeeee!" I squeal as I run toward him after stepping off the escalator. I swing my backpack off my shoulder and drop it on the ground before leaping into my best friend's arms. I wrap my legs around his waist and my arms around his neck in a hug so tight I worry I might squeeze the air right out of him.

But judging from the grip his strong arms have on me right now, I'm guessing that's not going to happen. God, he feels good.

Like comfort.

And happy.

And everything is right in the world.

"Hey babe," he murmurs into my ear as I bury my face in the crook of his neck. Hugging Auggie has always been one of my very favorite things. The number of bad days I had growing up that ended with me rushing to his house for a comforting hug were more than I can count. He's always been my source of happiness. My emotional support. My safe place.

A light chuckle rises from his chest. "Ella?"

"Hmm?"

"Did you eat a cinnamon roll on your flight?"

Shit.

How does he always know?

I finally release him and he lowers me until my feet touch the floor. With a cautious wince, I nod. "One before my first flight, one during my layover, and cinnamon roll bites on this last flight."

His brows peak and he chuckles again with a grin. "Shit, Ella. Do I make you that nervous?"

I'm crazy, I know.

I like to eat cinnamon rolls when I'm nervous.

It's a habit now.

I can't help it.

"Not exactly. I mean flying makes me nervous too but…" She shrugs. "I haven't seen you in over two years, Auggie. What if you took one look at me and decided your offer was a terrible mistake? What if we no longer have anything in common whatsoever? What if you don't want me here but you were just trying to be nice in offering me your place to live? Also, damn." I place my palms on his chest. "How the hell did you somehow get even bigger and harder than the last time I saw you? Are they force-feeding you protein powders everywhere? Sneaking it into your swole juice or something?"

He laughs, circling my wrists with his hands, which surprisingly also feel bigger and stronger. "They're feeding me just fine, babe. It's my job to stay fit. Plus we've been in preseason workouts." Still holding my hands, he steps back so he can get a better look at me. "And you look great too. This is a great look for you," he says, nodding to my leggings and crop top. "I half expected you to come down the steps in your pink sweatpants and Jonas Brothers t-shirt. And also," he tugs on the zippered hoodie I'm wearing that just happens to be his old hockey sweatshirt from freshman year of college, "where the hell did you find this?"

"It's been in my closet for years, remember? You leant it to me that one night after that concert on the quad when that drunk asshole spilled his beer all over me. I tried to return it to you but you told me to keep it…so I did. Now it's just become one of my comfort pieces. When I'm missing you, I just throw it on and pretend it's you."

He smiles with a shake of his head and pulls me back into his chest, wrapping his arms around me again. "Well, you won't have to pretend it's me anymore because I'll be right by your side. You're here now. Right where you should be. And for the record, there is zero chance in hell I would ever turn you away or not want you here, alright? If I didn't want you here, I wouldn't have offered in the first place and you'd still be living in Indigo Bay."

"Okay." I sigh, allowing myself to breathe him in.

August Blackstone.

My person.

"I believe you."

"Good," he says. "Because I'm really fucking glad you're here. Now let's go get your luggage."

"Seriously, what do they put in the water out here?" I take another glorious bite of the pepperoni pizza August bought for dinner. "This has to be the best pizza I've ever eaten."

"Mmm." August shakes his head as he swallows his bite. "That's because you haven't been to Chicago. Wait till we play the Red Tails this year. I'll take you out for the real deal. Chicago has the best deep-dish pizza in the world as far as I'm concerned."

"Yeah?"

"Hands down."

"So, tell me about the guys on the team. What are they like? Will I like them?" I lean back against the couch from my place on the floor, twisting my mouth. "Will they like me?"

He scoffs lightly. "Of course they'll like you. What kind of question is that?"

"A sincere one." I shrug. "I just want to know what they're like. I mean, I don't want to interfere with your day-to-day life but if I get this job, I'll obviously be around a lot. I wouldn't want your friends to think I'm some sort of flake or something."

"Trust me. They won't think that. They're not like that."

I curl my hand in that come gesture. "Okay…I'm listening. Tell me more."

August takes another bite of his slice before he speaks again. "Oliver Magallan is a great guy. He's the team captain and he's the only one of us who has a girlfriend. Well, fiancée actually. He's got a solid head on his shoulders and pretty much always does the right thing. He's like the Captain America of the Anaheim Stars. Fun fact: his sister is married to one of the players on the Red Tails so we've struck up a nice relationship slash rivalry with their team. They're good guys."

"Okay. Oliver's a ten but he's married. Got it. Next?"

August's brow rises as he watches me warily. Why I'm all of a sudden getting a chilled look from him, I have no idea.

"What? Did I say something wrong?"

He shakes his head and then clears his throat. "No. Uh, then there's Griffin. He's my best friend."

"What?" I rear back, a little hurt. "I thought I was your best friend?"

"You are babe." He smiles, wiping his mouth with his napkin. "Okay think of Griffin more like my brother. My very humorous, sometimes crass, and inappropriate but would kill anyone for hurting you kind of brother."

I incline my head and smile. "Sounds like the perfect kind of guy. Teddy bear with a sense of humor but cross him and pay the price?"

"Yep. Exactly like that."

"Swoooon," I breathe, leaning my head back on the couch.

August laughs. "I wouldn't go that far. Also, he has this fascination with pajama pants. I can't remember if I've mentioned it before."

I cock my head. "Pajama pants? How so?"

"He collects them. He's always wearing a different pair anywhere and everywhere. He's got them in all colors and with all sorts of random designs. Scooby Doo pants, Transformer s pants, Batman pants, Star Wars pants, ones with cats, ones with sloths, ones with eggs and toast. Seriously, you name it, he's probably got them."

"That sounds like fun! At least he sounds like a guy who appreciates his comfort."

"I keep telling him one day he's going to find a girl just like him and it's going to be hilarious."

"Okay, who's next?"

"Harrison," he says with a nod. "Really great guy. Hard worker. Loves kids. He helps coach the youth league whenever he can and helps run a few hockey camps over the summer during the off-season. He's one of those guys who will literally give you the shirt off his back if you ask for it. Or he'll rip it from you on the ice."

I giggle. "Really? A shirt ripper, eh?"

"These guys are all beasts on the ice. I'm telling you. They all have great personalities off the ice, but when we're on the ice and it's game time, we leave it all out there. Nothing gets through us when we're really playing well."

I purse my lips, making a mental note of all August is telling me. "Got it."

"Ledger is like another big brother. A little goofy. He has an enthusiastic sense of humor, but he's got a huge crush on one of the girls who works in the front office. He's been too scared to ask her out so sometimes he denies he has a crush at all, but we know. We see the way he is with her. It's cute. One of these days he'll come around."

I gasp, sitting up a little more interested. "Oh my gosh that sounds like cute juicy gossip! Who is she?"

"Can't tell you." August laughs. "At least not until after you get the job."

"Aww man! Why not? What if I don't get the job?"

He looks at me dismissively. "One, you'll get the job and two, if you don't, I'll absolutely tell you. I promise."

"Then why can't you just tell me now?"

"Bro code," he says plainly.

"Ugh! So unfair!"

Ignoring my cries, he continues. "Listen the only one of us who seems to have a proverbial stick up his ass is Barrett. He's our goalie and he's a grump probably a solid eighty percent of the time. So, when you meet him, don't be shocked if he comes across that way. It's just his personality."

My brows crease and I tilt my head. "Why do you think he's grumpy a lot?"

"Beats me. He works harder than anyone of us and he's fucking good at what he does. Best goalie in the league hands down though you'll never hear him say it. But he's also had a few knee issues lately. I know that bothers him more than he admits."

"Married?"

He shakes his head and leans forward to grab another slice of pizza from the box. "Nope. Like I said, Oliver is the only one who is in a committed relationship though they're not married yet. Honestly, I'm not sure Bear would ever get married. He doesn't seem the type."

I wag my brows. "So, a bunch of single hockey players, huh? Any of them good dating material?"

He nearly chokes on his bite at my question. "For you?"

"Yeah."

"No. Absolutely not."

I give my best friend a goofy smile. "What? Why not? You just said they were all single."

"And they're all sluts," he explains. "I'm sure Griff has had more than one sexually transmitted disease. I love the guy but he'll sleep with just about any pussy that walks by. Ledger has a tiny dick. Trust me, I've seen it. Plus, like I said, his interests lie elsewhere."

"But—"

"Harrison is never around. He keeps a remarkably busy schedule so you'd hate that too and Barrett's an asshole so…you know. I wouldn't if I were you."

"Uh huh. Okay. Well, speaking of dating…should we come up with some sort of…I don't know, ground rules or something?"

"Ground rules? What do you mean?"

"Yeah ground rules. You know, like leave a sock on the door when you have a woman here." I tap his hand with my own. "Cause as much as I love you, Auggie, I do not want to walk in on that! And I don't really want to have to hear it either." I twist my mouth. "Though I guess I could get a sound machine or something."

"Ella."

"What?" I look up from my pizza to find him staring me down.

"We don't need ground rules."

"Why not? What if?—"

"I don't bring women here, Ella."

I cock my head, studying him. "What, like ever?"

"Never." He shakes his head slowly and I'm flabbergasted with his answer.

"You're serious?"

"Very serious."

I stare at him for a moment, taking in his rigid demeanor, and then I let out an uncomfortable laugh. "What the fuck, Aug? You live in this…" I flail my arms. "Palatial apartment in the swankiest of buildings. You literally have everything here you could ever want that would certainly make any woman happy and you're telling me you've never invited a woman back to your place?"

"Hell no," he says. "This place is my place. My private safe space. If fans knew where I lived, I would have lines of crazies at my door all the fucking time so no. No way. I don't bring anyone back here. Nobody knows where I live except the other guys on the team because a few of them live in this same complex."

I narrow my eyes, taking in his words. "So, you've never…you've never slept with a woman in your own bed?"

How can this be?

He shakes his head quietly having swallowed another bite of pizza. "Ella, I don't usually sleep with women if you get my drift."

"You don't…" I gasp, hearing his words in my head. "August Blackstone you don't sleep with women?"

"No."

"But you fuck them?"

I see the slight lift in the corner of his mouth. Like he's proud I came to the correct conclusion. "All the time."

Something in my stomach drops.

I'm shocked by this news.

Why am I shocked by this?

My shoulders droop as my body slouches. "You're a pump and dump guy?"

He shrugs, popping the last of his pizza slice into his mouth. "I like to think of it as an adrenaline deposit. And you know this about me, Ella. When was the last time I had a relationship of any kind?"

He's right. I know this about him. But still. I thought maybe I was wrong. I thought maybe somewhere in that professionally cold soul of his there might be some sort of a heart.

"Ugh!" I roll my eyes and wipe my mouth with my napkin. "You're the worst."

"How am I the worst? I've never given any woman the wrong idea. They're all willing participants. Fucking is just…"

"What…?" I ask him, standing from the floor and crossing my arms over my chest and suppressing the feeling that I want to cry. Ugh, why is crying my go-to emotional response? I hate this about myself. "What is fucking, exactly, to you?"

And why is this news upsetting me more than I thought it would?

It's not like I didn't know he sleeps around.

"Fucking, for me, is just a way to help me unwind after a game. There's nothing emotional about it." He shrugs. "It's fun. It's physical and it gives me the release I need after a hard day…pun unintended." He smirks. "What's so bad about that?"

I cock my head. "So, then, what about me?"

"Uh…what about you?"

"Well first of all, what if I don't see fucking as just a physical…" I shake my head trying to find the words. "Deposit of adrenaline as you so nicely put it."

His brows lift. "I'm guessing from the look on your face that fucking is more of an emotional thing for you."

"Yes. Of course it is, but that's not what I meant when I brought up me. I meant, what happens when I want to bring a man home to my bed?"

He shakes his head adamantly. "No, no, no, no, no. That's a hard pass. Nobody touches you. Certainly not in my house."

Okay, now he's just pissing me off. I jut my hip out, my jaw dropping as I scoff. "So, it's okay for you to run around fucking whomever you want, but I can't have a boyfriend if I want one?"

"You can fuck whoever you want. Just don't do it here and honestly, I'd probably be better off not knowing about it."

"But unlike you, I'm the relationship type, Auggie. So, if and when I find the right guy for me, I'm going to want him to meet you and spend time with me and us, here, in my home. We're going to want to be physical because that's important to me in a relationship. You said I could live here."

"And I meant it, but?—"

"So really you meant I can sleep here, but if I want to do any kind of living, which may or may not include a relationship with someone, or God forbid, sex of any kind, I better do it somewhere else."

"Listen Ella, I?—"

I can feel my heartrate rising with every passing second. "What happens when one of your teammates falls madly in love with me, huh? What then?"

My challenge amuses him. "Right. Like that's going to happen."

I shift back a step, my mouth hanging open. "Oh, so now I'm not good enough for your teammates?"

His smile fades, his brows pinch, and he shakes his head. "That's not what I'm saying at all. Why are you getting all?—"

"You know, I'm not really liking where this conversation is going." I raise my hand to stop him from saying anything else. The last thing I want to do is fight with my best friend on my first day here.

"Ella." He steps toward me but I take another step back again.

"No. I get it. I hear you. Loud and clear."

Resigning himself, he pushes his hand through his mussed hair, fumbling his words. "Look if you…sleep with whoever you want. It's none of my business but?—"

"That's right. It's none of your business, but alright. I'll play by your rules, August. So, just so you know, when I don't come home one night it's because I'm obviously out having the best fuck of my life."

"Ella."

"I'm tired from traveling. And I have a big day tomorrow."

We didn't even get to talk about my interview. It's fine though. I'll be fine. Everything's fine.

"I'm going to bed."

Frustrated and disappointed.

"Ella."

"Good night, August."

I rarely call him August.

He's always been Auggie to me.

It actually hurts to walk away from him as I head to my room and shut the door. Leaning against it, I inhale a deep breath and release it slowly.

Maybe we're both tired.

Maybe we have to get through a few growing pains after moving in.

Maybe this won't be as easy as either of us thought.

I just hope it's all worth it.