Chapter 8

Chapter Eight

William

I called the office and let them know I wouldn’t be in today. I didn’t tell them why. I was sure they'd find out soon enough, but until then, I’d preferred not to have to answer a bunch of questions. Once in a day was enough for that shit, and I’d had my fill of it from the station. Carlotta and I were finally allowed to leave at around two p.m. with warnings not to leave the country and that we needed to be available if they need anything else from us. I was kind of tempted to just hop on a plane and ignore what Officer Dumont said, but deep down, I knew that would only make me look guilty and I had nothing to hide.

Well, nothing except for my affair with Candy. And I knew how to hide that. I picked my cellphone up and began going through everything. I started with my call log and then moved on to my text messages. I had to get rid of any trace of Candy from my cellphone. I deleted all the texts, all the sexts, and all the calls. Next, I knew I would have to delete the sexy nudes she had sent me, as much as I knew I would regret that once they were gone. I would also have to delete her phone number from my contacts list.

“Who are you texting?” Carlotta asked me.

I had almost forgotten that she was there. I glanced at her, trying to bite down my anger at her. So much of this was her fault, and she didn’t seem to see that at all. Who I was or wasn’t texting was none of her business, but I didn’t think I had the energy for another fight with her, so I decided to just tell her the truth.

“No one,” I said. “I’m erasing all of my texts from Candy. I don’t want a single trace of her left on my phone when I’m done.”

Carlotta rolled her eyes and shook her head, looking at me like I was a child who had said something so stupid, she didn’t know whether to laugh or cry.

“The cops will know you’ve done that, William. They’ll get access to your calls and texts from your cellphone provider if they want them. And then when they see your cellphone, they’ll know you erased them all. It’ll make you look guilty.”

“Then I’ll erase all of my calls and texts and they’ll think I just like a clean inbox,” I fired back.

“They won’t believe that’s normal. Seriously, William, just stop it,” she insisted.

I knew suddenly what she was trying to do. She was trying to confuse me and make me panic. She wanted me to leave everything on my phone so that the cops could find it and it would make me look like the guilty party.

“You’re incriminating yourself by trying to hide this,” Carlotta added.

I laughed, a bitter sound that I didn’t like one bit.

“You mean you’re trying to incriminate me by trying to convince me to leave a ton of circumstantial evidence behind that all points to me,” I said scornfully.

Carlotta’s eyes filled with tears. She blinked and they started to run down her face.

I sighed. “Oh, here we go. The water works.”

She glared at me through her tears.

“You know what, William? You do what you like. And when you incriminate yourself, don’t say I didn’t warn you, all right?”

“For fuck’s sake, Carlotta. You’re so damned manipulative,” I said, shaking my head.

I put my phone down, letting her think she had won this one, when in reality, I had finished deleting everything I wanted rid of. I kept a couple of Candy’s naked pictures, ones where her face wasn’t in them. I needed something to look at to remind me of better times when Carlotta started like this again.

“Screw you, William. I’m done with all of this,” Carlotta said.

She picked up a book from the small table beside her. She stared intently at the pages, but her eyes didn’t move. She wasn’t reading the book. She just wanted to cut off our conversation. Well, screw that.

I got to my feet and crossed the floor to Carlotta. She didn’t even look up until I snatched the book out of her hands and put it back on the table.

“What are you hiding, Carlotta?” I said.

“From the police? Your affair,” she snapped.

“Not from the police. From me,” I said .

“I didn’t kill Candy, if that’s what you’re implying,” she snapped.

I was getting sick of her trying to manipulate me and snapping at me like I was the bad guy here.

“It’s funny you sound so certain about that when your only form of defense is the claim that you can’t remember anything that happened that night,” I said with a smirk.

She looked at me for a second and then she looked down at the ground. I almost pressed the matter, but truthfully, at that point, I was just glad to get her to shut up for a minute and let me think.

I sat back down and ignored Carlotta when she picked her book back up again. We remained sitting in silence, each of us hiding our secrets, each of us filled with bubbling resentment. I began to wonder how the hell my marriage had come to this.

I remembered when Carlotta and I first got together. How we couldn’t keep our hands off each other. How we would talk and talk for hours and share every little secret. And now, we barely spoke to each other except to fight. I didn’t know how Carlotta had changed so much.

I knew for sure in that moment that our marriage was failing. Maybe not even failing. Maybe it had already failed. Carlotta was no longer the woman I had fallen in love with. She had spent our whole marriage manipulating me until she believed she was in charge. She had even pushed me into the arms of other women. And yet still I was here, by her side. She really needed to wake up and realize how lucky she was.

My thoughts became darker and darker and I felt myself sinking into despair. This wasn’t how my life was supposed to go. We were supposed to be happy. Carlotta was meant to make me happy, but she didn’t. Not anymore.

Only one thing made me happy now. The feeling of being wanted by some pretty young thing who could have any man she wanted and yet chose me. Maybe that’s what I should do. Go out and find some eager girl to fuck. That would certainly help to ease some of the stress out of me. I could do it now. Just get up and go and get changed and hit the town.

I shook my head, pushing the idea away. Even though I was totally wired, I also felt exhausted, tired to the bone, and I knew I didn’t even have the energy to go and get changed, let alone go out.

Instead, I stood up and headed for the liquor cabinet. I poured myself a large scotch, and after a second of internal deliberation, I poured Carlotta one as well. She barely looked up from the book she had actually started to read at some point while I was brooding. She grunted something that I took to be a thank you.

I went back to my seat and sipped the scotch, hoping to push all of my problems away with it. Tomorrow would be soon enough to go out and find someone to take my mind off this shit.

I finished my drink and debated going for another one, but I didn’t even have the energy to do that. As my eyes started to close, I figured sleeping right where I was would be the best thing for both of us tonight. I didn’t think Carlotta would want me in our bed any more than I wanted to be there.