Chapter 18

The dream snuck in like all the others. It teased relentlessly until her body was on fire. Limbs heavy, breasts aching, and a steady throb that was both exquisite and painful, Ivy moaned softly and flipped onto her back. She opened her legs for him.

Mike Paul was there, a devilish grin on his face as his hands moved over her body. Caressing her breasts. Playing with her nipples until they were rock hard. His hands moved lower, skimming her abdomen. Then, her waist. Then settled right there , where she needed him to be.

“You like that?” he whispered wickedly.

“Don’t stop.”

He kissed her. A long, lazy kiss that had her senses exploding while his deft fingers made quick work, his touch sending electric shocks rifling over her skin that penetrated deeper, pulling on that place inside her where pleasure lived.

“I love you, Wilkens,” he whispered hoarsely before he kissed her again. Before he teased her into a frenzy. “Say it back.” He was poised above her, that beautiful face of his so intense his eyes blazed.

“I…” She tried to swallow. Tried to speak.

“Say it.” This time, his voice was rough.

“I…” She tried again, but her tongue was so thick she couldn’t form any words.

“I need to hear it.” Mike Paul was relentless with his hands and his fingers and, God, that tongue. “Say it, Ivy.”

Why couldn’t she speak?

I love you.

Why couldn’t she get the words out?

“You’re killing me, Wilkens.”

She heard a knocking sound, one that got louder as the moments ticked by, and frowned. What was it? Where and why was it happening? Eventually the fog lifted, and Mike Paul slipped away, leaving her empty and mad and horny and?—

“Will you stop with the knocking already?” She tossed a pillow at her bedroom door and sat up, pushing hair from her face so she could see. The clock on the bedside table told her it was nearly ten a.m. With a groan, she rolled off the bed and pushed open her bedroom door.

Kip stood in the hallway, a grin on his face. “Some interesting sounds were coming from in there. Wasn’t sure if you were alone or not.”

“Coffee,” she mumbled and pushed past him. He followed a few paces behind and grabbed a stool at the island while she poured herself a cup. One taste made her nearly gag. “My God, that’s terrible.”

“I made it two hours ago.”

“Why didn’t you wake me earlier?” She shoved the cup into the microwave, her level of grump increasing by the second.

“Because you’ve been sleeping like shit all week, and I thought you needed the extra time.”

“A lot of good it did.” She made a face and watched the cup go round and round.

“Here I was hoping you’d come out of that dungeon a new person.”

Ivy grabbed the mug and gulped down some of the lukewarm liquid. She eyed Kip overtop of the cup and shrugged. “I’d put on a happy face, but I’m not feeling it.”

It had been nearly a week since she’d seen Mike Paul. Nearly a week since they’d spoken, and he’d left her place, leaving Ivy with the proverbial ball in her court. The dreams were getting ridiculous. Seriously, a girl could only take so much. She’d told Kip as much the minute he’d walked through the door last Sunday night.

“I’m done, Kip. I can’t do this anymore. It’s gotten too complicated.”

Tired from a long ass trip home from Japan, he’d sunk onto the sofa and offered a small smile. But it didn’t reach his eyes, and she knew something was off.

“Can we hold off a little longer before the official break up?” His voice was strained, and she immediately sat down across from him.

“What’s wrong? What’s happened?”

“You’re not going to like this.”

“Try me.”

“My family is coming to Big Bend the day before Christmas.”

Shocked, she’d had to take a moment. “All of them?”

He rolled his neck and shrugged out of his jacket. “The senator has cleared his schedule. And Duke is coming with Keely. I guess the South of France didn’t interest her all that much.”

“Oh.”

“Collins might make it for Christmas day, but she’s coming back from Europe as well, so who knows.”

“But why?” Ivy didn’t understand. “I’ve never even met them. Your parents didn’t seem the least bit interested in me after our so-called engagement leaked. And your brother, I mean, you guys haven’t talked in a long time or am I wrong?”

“You’re not wrong.”

She shook her head as a new thought occurred. Her eyes flew to his, panicked. “Please tell me they don’t think we’re getting married on New Year’s Eve.”

“I don’t know what they think. But it will be hard keeping that little bit of news from them when they come.”

“Shit. What are we going to do? I only said we’d get married on New Year’s Eve because…”

His eyebrows lifted.

“Because Mike Paul drives me nuts, and I wasn’t thinking clearly, and I was mad, and he’d just left Thanksgiving dinner without speaking to me, and?—”

“In his defense, you were kind of frosty.”

“Whose side are you on?”

“I get it. You wanted to hurt him or make him jealous.”

“Something like that.”

“Look. We got ourselves into this mess because we were both trying too hard to avoid the things we need to face.”

“There was the tequila as well.”

“We can’t forget the tequila. It makes the most asinine idea seem like a good one.” Kip pulled off his sweater, leaving him in a white T-shirt, and tossed it. “Has something changed with you and this guy? Has Mike Paul found a way to make you forgive him?”

And then, Ivy had finally admitted the one thing she’d been afraid to say out loud. “I don’t think he ever needed my forgiveness. I think I’m the one with issues. Trust is a big one. And that’s more to do with me and my family. My dad, in particular.” Just thinking of him made her feel sad.

Kip sat a bit straighter. “You’ve never told me about him. About what happened.”

“I can’t go there right now.”

Kip had gotten up off the sofa and grabbed her into a bear hug. He’d kissed the top of her head, and when he spoke, his voice was low and rough.

“We’re in a mess here with no one to blame but ourselves.”

She’d nodded but kept quiet.

“The engagement was dumb. I knew it the minute it came out of my mouth. But I liked the idea of Keely knowing I was with someone. I didn’t want her to think I was sitting home, moping over the fact that she’d been screwing my brother when I thought I was the only one she wanted.”

Ivy wasn’t surprised the mysterious Keely was behind Kip’s motivation for this charade.

“Duke and I have never been close, and not for my lack of trying.” Kip was quiet for a bit. “He’s three years older than me and when I was a kid, I worshipped him. He was good at everything. Amazing ball player. He played third and could switch hit like a dream. He was drafted by the Dodgers and played six games. But then he tore his rotator cuff, and after recovery, it wasn’t the same. He wasn’t the same. Duke was sent down to the miners and quit two months in.”

“I’m sorry.”

Kip shrugged. “I tried to be there for him, but my own career was taking off and he wasn’t happy about it. We grew distant and lost touch. And then Keely happened, and I pretended I didn’t care, but I guess I did.” He cracked a smile. “I conjured up a fiancé and look where it’s gotten us.”

“I wanted a buffer between myself and Mike Paul.” She looked up at him. “I mean, the whole stupid thing made sense.”

“Like I said. The tequila was a bad idea.” He exhaled slowly. “My grandfather is coming with them and it’s the only reason I’m not nixing their plans.”

At Ivy’s questioning look, he smiled. “My mom’s dad. He was a coal miner his whole life. Grew up in Kentucky and he’s the best man I know. He hasn’t been well. He’s got heart failure. But he’s making the trip to Montana because he wants to meet you. I know it’s a big ask. But can we keep things status quo until they leave? I haven’t always had a stellar past and I don’t want my grandfather worrying about me. I don’t want to disappoint him either. I don’t think he’ll understand this mess we’ve created. According to Mom, he doesn’t have a lot of time.” He didn’t try to hide the pain. “It’s probably why they’re all coming.”

“Of course, we’ll keep up appearances. Why stop it now?”

And for the rest of the week, they’d carried on as before. A fake engaged couple who were busy doing their own thing. Kip worked out. He took Zoom meetings with his agent, rented action movies and played around in the kitchen. While Ivy slept like crap, was a grump until at least noon, and did everything in her power to avoid her friends and family. Mostly the family.

Which was why, on this particular Saturday, as she stared across the kitchen at Kip, she felt a complete, irrational rage take hold. His family would arrive Sunday night, which gave her exactly thirty-six hours to grow the thickest skin imaginable. God, his family, and her mother together in one room. It was enough to give a person hives.

She began to itch at the thought. First her neck. Then, her arms. Then, behind her ears.

“Are you okay?” Kip asked.

“No.” She glanced up, scratching the back of her legs. “I’m not okay. I’m so far from Okay Mountain that I don’t know how to find my way back.”

“Let me know when the storm ends, Wilkens because I’ll still be here.”

“We had a moment, you know?” She was hopping on one foot while trying to scratch the bottom of the other. “And he was being a good guy and trying to do the right thing. And I was standing there like an idiot, and I didn’t say a word because since when does the truth make it all good? And now it’s been nearly a week, and I haven’t heard from him, and what if he’s decided that he was wrong?” She ran out of breath and took a moment. “What if he realizes that he doesn’t love me? Oh my god, I just said the L word, and he's never even said it. Maybe his L word is like. Maybe he only likes me.” She shook her head. “I’m going crazy, and I’m scared, and your family will be here soon, and we only just got the Christmas tree up, and I have no presents, or cards or walnuts or fruit cake, but you know what I do have? I have hives, and I?—”

“Go see him.”

Out of breath, Ivy could only stare across the room. “What?”

Kip shrugged. “Go see Mike Paul. Tell him the truth.”

“Are you sure?”

He nodded. “This has gone on long enough, don’t you think? Go and see him and figure out your stuff.”

“But what about your family?” She bit her bottom lip, conflicted. “What about your brother and Keely?”

His face hardened. “I’m a big boy and it’s time I started acting like one. I’ll call and let them know about the change in our circumstances. I’ll tell them we broke up. That there’s no need to come to Montana.”

“Maybe we need to take a minute and think about this.” The doubt bunnies were jumping around. She yanked on the sleeve of her pajama top. “Won’t your grandfather be disappointed?”

“Probably.” Kip offered a pained smile. “He would have liked you.”

“Are you sure?”

“I’m sure.”

A new thought struck Ivy. “My mom is going to hate this.” She started to smile. “So much.”

“Go. Now. Get laid.” He winked. “At least one of us should.”

Ivy ran to her bedroom, mind moving so fast she had to stop and rethink everything she’d just thought of.

Shower. Shave. Moisturize. Everywhere . Make sure to find the bag that held the new red bra with matching undies. Perfume. Everywhere. Curl hair. Keep the waves loose because she knew Mike Paul liked it that way.

She turned on the hot water and let it run. Then, she shoveled the pile of clothes off the chair beside her bed and retrieved her cell phone. God, she hadn’t checked it since the day before and had missed a gazillion messages. She quickly scanned them, but none were urgent, not even the six or seven from her mother, all with the word URGENT as the first word.

She stopped at the last message she’d received from Mike Paul. It had been sent well over a week ago after they’d delivered the foal. She quickly typed out a new one.

The storm is over.

She waited a few seconds for a reply, but the message didn’t change from delivered to read. Shit. She read over the message and blushed. God, she sounded like an overly dramatic teen and, with fumbling fingers, tried to figure out a way to delete the message.

Ivy’s stomach, already in knots, rolled over, and she nearly fell off the bed when those three magical dots appeared.

She waited. Then waited some more. But the three magical dots remained in play without materializing into a message. Frustrated, she tossed the phone and hopped in the shower. He’d read her message, and that was enough. He was probably busy with something or got distracted midway through his response with a sick animal or his mother or the dogs.

Whatever the reason, it didn’t matter. She was going to Mike Paul.

She was going to have all the sex and tell him how she felt. Ivy was done playing games.

Her bravado lasted exactly three hours and forty-six minutes. Which was the amount of time it took for her to get ready—do all the washing and shaving and makeup. Throw on a pair of jeans that fit her butt like a glove, shimmy into a tight, metallic blue top that made her eyes pop, and her boobs look as if she’d gone up at least one cup size, and with Kip shooing her out the door, hop into her truck and drive out to Mike Paul’s place.

She stood at his front door for another four minutes because she was suddenly so damn nervous she was second-guessing herself.

Ivy grabbed her phone, turned on the camera, and reversed the lens so she could check her appearance. The woman staring back at her looked like she was on the brink of something big. Life changing big. Her cheeks were red, probably from the cold, but still, and her eyes were luminous, her lips shiny with gloss. Her hair billowed around her face, a silky dark sheen that fell in loose waves halfway down her back.

Wait. Was that a pimple? Ivy looked closer and nearly jumped out of her skin when her phone pinged. It was another message from her mother. She saw the word URGENT and swore. Could her mother let her have one day off without annoying the crap out of Ivy? She was in the process of trying to stuff the phone back into the pocket of her jacket when the door suddenly opened, and she found herself staring up at the man who’d haunted her for days now.

“Ivy,” he said, clearly surprised. “I was just going to call the dogs in.”

Mike Paul was shirtless; faded jeans hung low on his hips. His feet were shoved into boots, and he wore a black beanie. He looked so damn adorable and hot and sexy that all the words she’d stored up disappeared like water down the drain. She licked her lips, then narrowed her gaze. Was that a…

“Do you have a black eye?” she asked, peering closer.

“Do you like it? I figure it makes me look tough.” His voice was husky.

“Are you going to tell me how that happened?”

His eyes dropped to her mouth. “Not right now, if that’s okay.”

“You didn’t answer my text.”

“It’s been a crazy day.” He looked tired, and her concern ramped up.

“Are you okay?”

“I am now.”

“I’m not engaged.”

“What?” He scrubbed at the hair on his chin. “You guys broke up?”

“It was fake.”

“What was fake?”

“The engagement.”

“Your engagement was fake.” He frowned.

Ivy nodded.

“You and Lafferty aren’t a thing.”

“We never were more than just good friends. I know it sounds stupid, us pretending to be engaged, and honestly, the explanation kind of makes sense, I guess, if you look at it from our perspective, but?—”

Those were all the words she got out because suddenly Mike Paul’s mouth was on hers and she lost all train of thought. He kissed her deeply, holding her tight and not letting go until two wet noses forced them apart.

Breathing heavily, she glanced down at Weiner and Bun, who’d just come running from the barn.

“Your timing sucks,” she muttered.

Mike Paul’s hand slid under her chin, and the look on his face just about made her panties melt. “It’s cold out here.”

She nodded because, again, all the words inside her were gone.

“You coming in, Wilkens?” Mike Paul stood back and held out his hand.

A heartbeat passed. He didn’t have to ask twice.